Moon's Light, Reality's Dream
by G i g a HEART
Summary: Kakashi/OFC Gaara/OFC Hitori, an Anbu operative sent to spy on the Kazekage for the scheming Danzou. Nisei, an Anbu captain unable to forget about the past, gets thrown back into Hatake Kakashi's life.
1. ダンゾウ Danzou

**Author Notes:** Hey guys! Lisa here, this is a general collaboration between my friend Amy, and I. The only few warnings that I give you are 1) Contains spoilers - for those of you who have not yet read the manga, or started to watch Naruto Shippuuden series, I suggest that you not read this story! 2) Later on there will be Mature content, otherwise known as Lemon. If you are uncomfortable with strong violence or language, or later sexual content, then please stop your wandering eyes! 3) Mary-Sue centric, which I do believe offends most people. Please do not flame! Leave positive feedback!

**Disclaimer:** We do not own any of Masashi Kishimoto's characters, but we do commend him for his excellence, and creative genius.

**More Author Notes:** We do like to use the Japanese terms for countries. If you become confused about anything, we will consider leaving footnotes. Also, the story begins a little bit before Sasori and Deidara appear.

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Moon's Light, Reality's Dream  
月の光、うつつの夢  
Chapter One – ダンゾウ (Danzou)

Danzou reclined at his desk, looking as if he didn't have a care in the world, his one good, unbandaged eye closed as he mused over the documents strewn across the polished wood. The rough hewn, dark, burnt orange rock walls of the Root building weren't particularly spectacular, nor was the ratty black carpet, but it hadn't been originally intended to be such a permanent home for himself, or his group. Things just had a way of falling into place like that. He'd never imagined staying here for as long as he had, that his dreams to become Hokage would take even years to come to fruition. But those hopes had plummeted to nearly nothing after his ill-fated alliance with Hanzou of Amegakure.

The entire mess cast a pall of suspicion and doubt over him, a new cloud even darker and more sinister than the one he'd already carried. Indeed, the Leaf had reasons not to trust him, many more than they even dared to dream of, and with Princess Tsunade as Hokage, they would be even wearier of his presence. Teaming up with the Rain Village was neither the worst, nor the wisest decision he'd made. However, the Root, on the other hand, was proving to be both one of his best ideas, and more than useful over these last few years.

So much about his own, and the Foundation's, activities had to be concealed from any means of discovery, that a Curse Seal had been created. When place on the tongues of the operatives it would leave his Anbu paralyzed if they dared to speak of anything having to do with the organization or it's founder, from his name or mildest intentions, to his cruelest, most twisted plans and desires. This was such an important matter to him, that Danzou himself was the only one to ever place the seal. The need for such a thing became more than apparent after the debacle with that brat, Uchiha Itachi.

Trying use blackmail was more in the way of a ninja, but now Danzou's seal made sure that none could use the Itachi Tactic on him whenever they wanted something, as well as guaranteeing no enemies would gain knowledge of his plans by capturing, interrogating, and torturing his ninja. Leaving Anbu Root was something that couldn't be easily done, unless Danzou himself approved of it, and had recently become all but an impossibility. He couldn't afford to lose any of his perfectly trained operatives, especially now when he felt he was so much closer to achieving his largest goal, the one desire that drove him before all others.

The smooth, crisp paper of the document now in Danzou's hand crackled softly, the sound seeming to say "this is your opportunity." Details of the Akatsuki, that secretive band of rogue and missing ninja who's objectives have never really been clear, were always hard to come by. But here, in his one ravaged hand, are the words stained onto parchment, that could lead to all new doors opening for him. The Akatsuki have crept silently from the shadows, acting on collecting the Jinchuriki, and their sealed biju, from the various Hidden Villages. Two suspicious, oddly garbed travelers have been spotted on the move towards Sunagakure. There could be only one reason for such a move by that dreaded organization. They'd finally set their sights on capturing Gaara and drawing Shukaku from him. Danzou couldn't help but smile, aware that he was probably in possession of this new piece of information long before any other in Konohagakure, which honestly more than pleased him.

Not only would it look better if he had already sent out one of his own, and then consulted Konoha, it would serve his purposes very well. He could have a spy there specifically to watch over Godaime Kazekage, the reason seemingly altruistic, but beyond invaluable to him, not just in helping procure the safety of Sunagakure's Kage, but also in terms of the information that would be ferreted back to him. Danzou firmly believed the adage "keep your friends close, and your enemies closer," though he believed there were none he would truly call 'friends'. Still, he was honestly interested in the outcome of an encounter between that Akatsuki and the extremely powerful Kazekage, as much as he needed to learn more about the possible enemies of the future - to have an idea of their methods, tactics, and goals.

He placed the document on his desk with a small sigh, his fingers trailing lazily over the worn and time polished dark wood to his folder labeled 'Ansatsu Senjutsu Tokushu Butai.' With calm thoroughness, he started to skim over the possible candidates for this mission. In his perfect memory lay the names of countless ninja who would suffice for this mission, but he could only recall one special case who might excel at it. His hand found the picture with ease, and gazing upon it, he remembered the small child he had found that day. Her family hadn't completely made it outside of the Sunagakure border, and the two cold, dead figures beside her were all the evidence needed that she belonged to the Sand village. Apparently attacked by rogue ninja, she had laid barely breathing with a deep slash to her chest. The girl should have, and without his intervention, definitely would have died. Perhaps even then, he'd had an inkling of the dormant potential residing within that seemingly unremarkable child.

"Perfect," he mused, his fingers tapping lightly on the top of the desk as he leaned back in his chair again. She was definitely highly capable, a credit to his unique training techniques, and his Root organization as a whole. The first step he had taken to save this girl's life, was to erase her emotions. Removing the need for grief - for her family, her home, her old, now lost life - from her mind had not only allowed her body to heal, but to become much, much stronger. Lack of emotion also distilled the mind into a singularity of purpose, as well as providing yet another mask, one of unreadable intentions, resulting in one who would obey without question, and loyalty of the purest level that would drive one doggedly to complete their mission.

Death would be the only acceptable means of failure. This mission would be a nice change of pace. A challenge, a test of her, and his training methods. If she were to return to Sunagakure, how would it affect her? Would she remember who she'd been at all? He desired this test of the efficacy of his teachings, desired to see if her heart would even connect to the place of her birth anymore, or if she only truly belonged to the Foundation. He felt he had taken it easy on her, despite the laws he chose to stick to when it came to strictly training his foundation. Would she bend, or would she break?

That little girl that he rescued had changed immensely from the photo that now lay atop the folder on his desk. When she was younger, he picked her out as the one with the bright orange hair that seemed to always be going in a million different directions. As the years passed, that hair had become darker, a deeper red, and tamed itself as it lengthened, now falling to brush her back just above the waistline of her pants. The photograph proclaimed more innocence in that bright, child's gaze. But her jade eyes had turned cold, at least from the last time he saw her, with the passing of time and many missions, including assassinations. He smirked, his fingers finally ceasing their tapping on the desk and laying still. Thinking back, he couldn't imagine that the missions he's sent her on have fazed her in the least.

Always professional and efficient, she'd carried out each one with silence, grace, and a strange sort of dignity, and always seemed to even lack pride in her successes, displaying only an odd sort of satisfaction at each positive completion. Sending her to spy on Sunagakure's Kazekage would undoubtedly mean little to her other than another mission to complete, and even less than the brief, 'I used to live here'. After all, Danzou had made nothing of her origins, tearing any form of loyalty she might have once held, and binding her with every tie he could think of to only himself and the Foundation.

He rose stiffly, with awkward slowness from his comfortable seat and took the gnarled old walking stick from the corner of his desk, limping slowly over to open the door. The two Anbu guards outside kept their gazes riveted on the end of the long, rocky hallway, for all intents and purposes ignoring his presence, exactly as they had been trained to do. These ninja, if they had feelings, they would fear. That fear would then surely breed hatred, and hatred would lead only to war. They all knew, in their own minds, that this way of the ninja was safe, but also very dangerous, a delicate, precarious balance that needed only one good shove to topple it into a nightmare. 'Ninja without hearts!' Danzou smiled proudly, recalling how he had declared a new form of Anbu, a new beginning of merciless ninja, who only served him, and admired him, as if he were right all along. Because of course, he was. Always. His voice was rough, gravelly, and carrying all the warmth and comfort of an open grave as he addressed them:

"From the Root of Anbu, get me Hitori."

------

"Ishida-kun!"

The Anbu captain stormed through the door, her white cloak swirling behind her much like the tail of an annoyed cat, and surveyed the training area with a critical eye, seeking a specific, spiky-haired goof of an Anbu ninja. Ishida had been responsible for more than his share of ridiculous, childish pranks, but this latest one was by far the worst. Anbu ninja are those who protect the village from exceptional threats, and are usually sent out on high-risk missions. Many times, these ninja do not return alive. Such behavior was therefore unseemly in a potential Anbu candidate. Being captain of such an organization, this young woman had the unenviable task of beating such childish antics out of her trainees, by any means necessary, but this newest squad was proving to be incompetent beyond all belief, to her way of thinking, anyway.

'Godaime Hokage, how can anyone ever think that these infant ninja are really ready, when they're joking all the time?' she thought hopelessly, as she spotted one of her three students, Koji.

He was easily the smartest, and the best of the hopeless cases she'd be handed. The one shining star in a dark, dismal night sky, though he could be so much more. They all had great potential, if they would just approach their training with the gravity it deserved. It was only natural that her squad should undergo more training, extensive and excruciating in it's occasional brutality, because though the Ninja Academy was supposed to cut out all of these humorous little bits of undesirable character traits, it didn't seem to be very effective. Especially going by what she was seeing from the younger ninja being sent in to become Anbu. This choice meant life was no longer child's play, but none of them ever seemed to realize that until they came back from their first Anbu mission. Those who survived to come back paid for the honor of their mask with the loss of their innocence. Those not so fortunate paid with their lives. It was a hard life, to be sure, but it was a noble one, and that was more than enough compensation for those who chose it.

"Koji-kun." The captain watched the green haired boy intently, observing him critically as he pulled out another kunai. From this range, it was hit or miss. She studied his movements as his arm drew back, his muscles flexing noticeably beneath the tight sleeve of his shirt, and found herself unable to keep from critiquing his form, but also unable to find flaw with it. She caught herself feeling a small sense of satisfaction as the weapon thunked sharply into the target with seemingly effortless ease, the sound of it's impact audible to anyone in the room. Koji shifted his thin framed glasses back onto the equally thin bridge of his short nose, and turned to her with a feline stare, his eyes full of the glow of success, and glinting with a shadow of something resembling contempt.

"What is it?" He asked curtly, looking more than a little annoyed by her sudden presence. The crack that resounded through the room as the back of her armored hand met the side of his face, was nearly as satisfying as the soft grunt that came from him while he dropped to one knee, his mouth falling open just slightly, as if shocked by her response. With utter calm, she glanced down at him, her voice resonating with the same chilling tone that all Anbu members eventually acquired, as he returned to his form, this time reaching for a shuriken.

"There is neither room, nor tolerance for insubordination within the Anbu ranks. You should have learned this by now." She managed to keep the sneer from her face, but it took more than just a little effort. "Also, you are wasting time training with shuriken, or even kunai. You should focus on wielding your ninjato, ne?" She slid the short, graceful sword from his back and handed it to him, trying to keep condescension off of her face, before glancing around the room to include everyone there. "I'm looking for Ishida-kun. There is an opportunity for a new mission. I think it's essential for this squad to go. You could all definitely use the learning experience."

"A learning experience, Nisei sensei?" Koji shook his head, his voice now much softer and holding no emotion whatsoever, as he gripped the ninjato tightly. "I get to wear my mask?"

"That's right." Nisei answered quietly, not reprimanding him for the nearly childish pleasure at discovering he'd finally get to wear his mask. All Anbu went through that same feeling of elation the first time they slid the cold, concealing porcelain over their faces, even if it only lasted until they walked out the door. Ishida's spiky hair came into view, and she walked quietly past Koji, swiftly intercepting her laconic, and extremely late, student, with a glare that should have put the fear of death into him.

Today, Ishida would learn a very valuable lesson, even if she had to spend hours beating it into his dense, stubborn head. She stepped closer to him, leaning in a little as she smiled kindly at the overly confident young ninja, her newest, and weakest, student.

He seemed proud of himself judging by the way he was grinning madly at her, showing all of his even, white teeth. When she spoke again, after a long moment, her voice was calm, her tone level, only the slight narrowing of her eyes betraying any emotion whatsoever. "I woke up today with a chill in my bedroom and I thought to myself, I never leave my window open. So how did it get that way?"

Ishida beamed another bright smile at her, obviously trying hard to keep his laughter undetected, as she continued in the same story telling tone:

"A good ninja can tell when there has been an intruder, even from the slightest difference in the room. I opened my eyes to find a string above my head and a poorly devised plan to have a bucket full of Strawberry Mango tea dumped onto my head. I then expertly maneuvered myself from the bed, and nearly failed to miss the string on the floor, which then set off a swinging stuffed monkey larger than me. This flying toy then pushed me onto the pile of unpeeled bananas, the very same bananas I just bought for five ryos a pound..." At the conclusion of this little tale, Ishida nearly bent double, unable to hold back his laughter anymore, which earned him a sharp slap on the back of the head from his team mate.

"Nisei sensei..." she said, her tone all business. This girl was the only one of Nisei's students who ever seemed to take things seriously. Ayu-chan frowned at her childish counterpart before turning to regard her teacher skeptically, her brown eyes seeming even darker than usual as she rubbed at the spiral tattoo on her right arm. "I feel like a rebel, doing this behind my mother's back."

"You're all acting like children," Nisei answered quietly, barely holding back a sigh. These three students that she was assigned to didn't deserve her level of expertise. It seemed ridiculous to be forced to train and look over a bunch of brats fresh from the Ninja academy, when Nisei had looked forward to teaching much more competent adults. In spite of her own young age, her level of skill should have been enough to ensure such a thing. "I wonder if you even deserve to go on this mission..."

The Anbu leader frowned at herself as she began walking away, mentally cursing the fact that she was a squad leader, and not a Jonin. She was definitely not the type with the temperament necessary to successfully teach kids. Luckily, she wasn't the only one stuck in this same position. Another team of Anbu would be joining them, the secondary leader being Kouki-san. He was a very strict leader, but he also had an older group with him. He raised his hand up to wave, and she lazily waved back, smiling to herself. His porcelain bird beaked mask was a sight she still found herself unable to keep from laughing at, as did many others, but no one ever dared to laugh about it in his presence.

Kouki was, without a doubt, someone to take seriously and Nisei made sure that her squad knew that as well. When the two teams met up, he started to go over the seemingly easy task of protecting a shipment to the allied village, Hoshigakure. These silly, self important young Anbu scoffed, and some even dared to laugh. They were much too sure of themselves alright, especially for children who had yet to see any real action, or even go out on a real mission. Nisei sighed, blowing a piece of her black chopped bangs out of her face as she balanced her weight, idly shifting from one foot to the other, obviously anxious to get moving. She could feel the soft movement of her long black hair swaying gently back and forth in its low ponytail, the ends just brushing over the backs of her legs. Lately, her impatience seemed to be getting the best of her.

'Being Anbu isn't a joke.' She couldn't help but have these doubt ridden thoughts. As much as she wanted to have confidence in her team, and in the way she'd tried to train them, that would just be fooling herself, and she knew it. These kids really had no idea what they were in for, the dangers that could and would occur, in spite of the best preparations in the world, made by even the most senior ninja. They were bound to happen, on nearly every mission. The unforeseeable. As if the life of a ninja wasn't cruel enough, the reality of Anbu would someday hit them, as brutally and unforgivingly as it hits every one of them. It's always only a matter of time before an Anbu respectfully resigns their title and moves on. There had to be a time when enough was enough.

An assassin who lives life killing without question, eventually loses even themself, and what was the point in that? When there is no longer honor in what you do, only pain and sorrow, then it's time to pass the flame onto the younger generation. If only that younger generation didn't seem quite so disappointing as these three, Nisei thought she might actually be able to sleep soundly at night. She conveniently pushed away the thought that she wasn't much further removed from her own Ninja Academy days, like so many other competent, and even excellent, Anbu operatives she admired. Sadly, these three just seemed hopeless.

Nisei didn't find her job in the least bit enjoyable, but she couldn't see herself doing anything else other than protecting the village, even killing dangerous ninja to do it. Her love life would remain an emotionless pit, she decided long ago. There was no rush to ever quit being Anbu, especially now that she was captain, and she could see no reason to complicate her life any further by clouding her heart. She had a point to prove to a certain someone, someone who had probably forgotten her by now, despite his close connections to Anbu. Her golden eyes closed, as she shrugged deeper into her white cloak. She really didn't want to remember…

'Kakashi senpai…onegai...'

As if she was actually hearing her own angry words from that day, Nisei's eyes snapped opened. In the cold, cruel depths of her subconscious, her mind was laughing at her. It was merely the weak Nisei from that day, the one she thought she'd rid herself of forever. Apparently, she'd been wrong.

"Let's go," Kouki nodded his pale blonde head towards the door, and one by one the newly promoted ninja started to head out, each happily putting on their masks like it was Halloween and they were going out for candy. Remembering the first time that she went out on as mission as Anbu was difficult, everything about it seemed surreal and otherworldly, but Nisei remembered enough to know that she didn't feel one bit elated.

She pulled on the red and black painted kitsune mask with steady hands and followed behind, sticking to the basics. If Kouki was up front, then Nisei would guard the rear. It didn't take long before their limbs grew tired, the younger ninja especially experiencing difficulties. Nisei was already used to her legs kicking off of each branch, and using her upper body strength to hang onto the rough wood beneath her fingers. She regarded each of the others as dispassionately as should could, wondering which would fail, hoping that none paid the ultimate price and lost their life today.

Today they would each learn that the way of the ninja was always rewarding, always full of honor, even in the smallest details, but it was never easy. No, it was never easy.

The carrier wasn't very far from where they had started. It awaited them just a small distance outside of the village proper. Though at this rate, Nisei wondered if they would ever make it to Hoshigakure no Sato. A glance to the sky assured her that at least there wasn't rain in the immediate future. One small detail to brighten what was otherwise sure to be a dim day.

------

Danzou stood beside his desk, waiting for Hitori to answer his summons and walk through the door. As usual, he didn't have to wait long, which pleased him immensely. He wasn't surprised to see her mask in place, fully knowing that the girl had on yet another mask beneath it, a covering over her mouth and nose. For whatever reason, she had started this many years ago and he connected it to the way she had been raised in the Sand. Between the sand storms and the constant wind, many of Sunagakure keep their faces wrapped, which only made sense. He started to wonder, as he regarded her solemnly, if he should have taken that away from her.

Was she wearing the mask as if it were some sort of safety blanket? A connection to the things she'd been forced to leave behind? Or was it merely for concealment purposes? The desire to never have anyone see her true face. They both seemed likely answers, as he had information that she even slept with that damned fabric mask over her face. Even her own partner had never seen more of her than her eyes. He pushed those bothersome thoughts aside, and stabbed the mission folder with the tip of his finger, immediately drawing her full attention to it.

"Two of the Akatsuki, at least two that we know of, are heading for Sunagakure. Their objective will no doubt be to capture Godaime Kazekage, since he is the host of the one tailed biju. You will be going there as a spy, but I would like you to remain undercover. Your reason for staying under the Kazekage's care, and in the tower, will be easy enough to lie about, should you even be forced into speaking of it at all. I received a letter quite some time ago from Baki, expressing his concerns about Gaara becoming the new Kazekage. Many in Sunagakure still do not trust him, and others fear him, so Baki is worried that someone will try to assassinate Gaara. Now is the perfect time to respond, is it not?"

Leaning back, he smirked, knowing his rhetorical question for what it was, but expecting her silent nod anyway. Behind the porcelain inu shaped mask, her head did nod slightly, her long dark hair falling forward as she then bowed in obeisance to the only the master she had ever known - the man who had saved her life. She settled her fist onto the floor gently, her body lowering even further, showing her deepest respect for him. The muscles in her arm flexed beneath the grey arm guard as her head dropped even lower still. Finally, her silky crimson locks pooled on the ground around her and she watched dispassionately through the eyes of her mask and the curtain of her hair, as the sharp end of Danzou's stick slammed down on the mass of hair, effectively holding her in place should she even dare to think of moving.

"If it comes to it... You are to sacrifice your life to save Gaara's." The law in Danzou's voice was absolute, and they both knew she would never disobey him. It was okay to have her wings figuratively pinned now, as a butterfly would, as a specimen. It was entirely okay, because nothing else mattered. She had been taught to respond. If you are alive, if you can breathe, see, feel, and think, then you can respond. The amount of pain she had endured, the mental blocks she had learned to construct, these had allowed her to successfully build the iron walls that Danzou spoke so often about in training. You must have an iron wall around your heart, so that no man, no enemy, no threat, and no friend could penetrate it. Her soft voice, when she finally spoke, was like nothing more than the brush of a moth's wings against your skin.

"Hai, Danzou-sama."

He lifted his stick from the ground, releasing her as he turned his back towards her, a blatant gesture of dismissal. Deep in thought, she walked the short distance back to the room she shared with another Anbu Root ninja, her usual partner on missions that required more than one operative. Yomi certainly wasn't the usual silent Anbu when the two of them were alone. He liked to talk in private, but when it came down to doing his job, he was as mute, ruthless, and efficient as the rest of them. Danzou would never suspect that he had such a verbose individual in his operation, and Yomi was smart enough to never give him a reason to suspect such a thing. Hitori was the "lucky" one who got to enjoy his rambling monologues. She actually found his voice, and his presence, oddly comforting, though it wasn't like their partnership was something of their own choosing, or even a random occurrence. Danzou had decided the two ninja made a very efficient, compatible team.

"What did one-eye want?" Yomi asked, keeping his legs crossed as he lay casually upon the top bunk, making conversation as he always did while awaiting his next mission, should there be one for him anytime soon. Hitori always figured it must just be his way of staving off the ennui that had a tendency to develop in the lull between missions. Some ninja trained harder. Yomi talked. "Oh, that's right, you respect him. I'm sorry. What did 'Danzou-sama' command of you this time?"

To Hitori, Danzou was the man who had saved her while she lay bleeding out her life into the sand. Those sorts of rogue ninja attacks were common in Sunagakure back in that time, and were never anything personal, though they were almost always viciously deadly. So without hesitation, and without a single second guess, Hitori believed her life was Danzou's to do with as he pleased. If it meant going to Sunagakure and protecting the Kazekage, then she would do it to the best of her ability. It was the least she could do, after all of this time of being under his care and supervision. It's not that Danzou was ever fatherly, because she was certain those sorts of thoughts had never crossed his mind, nor would she ever have regarded him that way. She was, and continued to be, an asset, a weapon, nothing but a game piece on the board of his plans and schemes. But he had fed and clothed her, put a roof over her head, and given her a purpose, a reason to continue existing. He wasn't the horrible person that everyone assumed he was. She idly wondered why no one else could see that.

"I have a mission in Sunagakure. The Kazekage needs protection." Hitori slid the bag from beneath her bunk and pulled the mission folder from it slowly. The monkey-faced Anbu regarded his partner in silence for a long moment, his face slowly creasing into a look of amusement before he chuckled softly. Hitori sincerely didn't want to know why he was laughing when the matter was obviously serious to Danzou, and therefore also now serious to her.

Yomi finally decided to break the tension by speaking softly. "Sabaku no Gaara is perfectly capable of taking care of himself. Why would anyone request help from Anbu to protect him? Especially Konoha Anbu. That's absurd. Whatever that old man has up his sleeves won't be pretty in the end, it never is…"

Hitori didn't feel the need to reply as she packed all of her slacks and black undershirts. The armor was washed everyday, and a secondary set of armor had never been issued, so there was really very little to pack. Her singular weapon of choice stayed in it's place on her back at all times, unless she was actually using it, and she owned no tiny personal belongings of any sort. She came to Konohagakure with nothing, and she would surely leave that way, having never felt the need to have anything silly little personal things of her own. Such a desire had, in fact, never crossed her mind, being just one of those strange things other people did.

Yomi glanced up and her eyes followed his to see an Anbu guard shadowing the doorway. "Hitori. The artistry has prepared you a new mask."

She didn't recall Danzou saying anything at all to her about a new mask, and she was oddly fond of the inu one she was currently wearing. Something like a small pang of regret seemed to sting at her heart before she pushed it away, having no time or desire for such feelings. Slowly, she rose from her spot on the floor and followed the Anbu down the dark stone corridors in her usual silence. Above all other things right now, she was mostly curious as to why she would need a new mask. That just didn't make sense to her, no matter what angle she looked at it from in her mind. Leaning down, she carefully ducked her way into the small, chilly room where the artists made the porcelain, painting each mask in traditional colors, creating small, simple and yet functional works of art.

Her jade eyes moved slowly over the long row of tables, over the ears and noses shaped into the various animals that the Anbu conceive of themselves as. As an Anbu your mask was chosen for you, and no one ever had the option of picking one for themself, much the same as the names they used. Hitori slowly stepped further inside the room, moving quietly over to stand behind the man who was seated with his back to her. His fingers rose almost lazily, pointing to the mask laying atop the small table next to him. It was the first time that she'd seen this type of animal on any Anbu mask, and when she picked it up and held it's weight in her hand, the complete irony of the chosen animal didn't take very long at all to hit her.

A raccoon mask.

Without a word, but bowing slightly to the artisan, she clasped the mask loosely in her hand, regarding it as she slowly made her way back to her room. One finger traced idly over the dark circles around the eye holes as she found herself wondering exactly what Danzou was implying by changing her mask. Obviously, it was directed towards Gaara himself, but to what end, exactly? What purpose did this serve.

Yomi looked up from his large bowl of noodles, his charcoal eyes musing at Hitori as she slowly brought her inu mask over her head with noticeable reluctance, and placed it gently on her bag. He raised an eyebrow at the look of deep thought on her face. She was a very difficult number to read, between her odd ways and having not said much over the past few years of working together on missions and assassinations. Rarely, if ever, did Hitori speak her mind, let alone speak at all. Yomi knew her enough to know when she wasn't pleased with something though. Even if the girl thought that she didn't have a personality, it was very much there, in every other aspect of her. Words weren't actually necessary when you spent that much time embroiled in dangerous circumstances with another person.

Wordlessly, Hitori lifted her hand up and turned the mask towards Yomi's inquiring eyes, which widened almost comically as he cracked a huge grin. "Why Hitori, I didn't know you were funny…"

She let her arm drop slowly back down with a soft sigh, and stood there taking it in. His teasing was deserved. After all, she made the mistake of showing the thing Yomi in the first place. His words continued, as much as she wanted to block them out, or shut him up, there was no use trying. When Yomi wanted to talk, there wasn't much anyone could do to divert him, something Hitori had learned the hard way.

"I mean really, you should show this side of you more often." Mixed honey and brown colored bangs hid the full potential of Yomi's amused glances towards her, as he continued to joke, "…I was getting pretty bored with laughing at the wall by myself, you know. You could at least make shadow puppets with me."

"I'd rather not."

An astonished gasp came from her partner, overdoing it as always and definitely enjoying the situation to it's fullest, as Yomi always did. "It speaks! And yet it only spoke to decline my friendly offer." A sad, puppy face followed his words. It was definitely going to be the full Yomi routine tonight, unless she somehow managed to cut him off before he could really get started.

"Tell me more about Gaara." As she held out her mission folder, she purposely made her voice louder than it would usually be, hoping to both distract him from his teasing, and gain a little more insight into the mystery of her assignment. For all of the information the Anbu Root had on Gaara, he still remained an enigma in her eyes, and she definitely didn't like heading into this situation with so many questions left unanswered.

"Only because you asked so nicely," Yomi's voice fairly dripped sarcasm, as he took the folder from Hitori's hand and flipped it opened. "What do you want me to start with? Chances are you've already studied this."

"I need to know everything, and somehow when you're reading it, I understand it better." She stretched out on her back on top of the thin lining of sheets and the hard padding they called a pillow, putting her hands behind her head and waiting to hear Yomi's voice, purposefully ignoring the surprised look on his face. He must've been thinking for as long as it took him to finally answer her.

"Are you going to close your eyes and pretend that your beloved Danzou is saying this to you?" He didn't wait for an answer, knowing that she would never reply to that question, but began reading instead. "January nineteenth, Gaara was born to the Fourth Kazekage of Sunagakure and his wife. Upon his birth, the Fourth Kazekage had the one-tailed beast, Shukaku, sealed inside of his son, in hopes of turning Gaara into the Suna's Ultimate Weapon…"

As Yomi continued to read, Hitori held the mask up above her head and stared into the empty, black ringed eye holes, trying again to think of a reason why Danzou would go out of his way to offend Gaara, or to even implicate irony. Those thoughts only lasted a few moments, and her cold eyes didn't waver - wondering wasn't good for her, either. As she placed the mask down on top of her bag alongside of her original mask, she realized she didn't completely hate the new, unique mask, but the more Yomi read, the more she started to dislike Gaara himself. He sounded like a selfish child, one of entirely questionable sanity, and she could fully understand why the village would hate, and fear him. Who would act as the Suna's weapon? And how could someone like that change the way he supposedly had, in such a short time? No, it just didn't make sense.

The young Anbu knew that she wouldn't get much sleep tonight, not with all of these questions about her new mission floating around in her head, and doing nothing more than raising new questions in their wake. It was apparently now a shared impossibility, as Yomi felt her uneasiness from the top of the bunk. There was a personal tie between Hitori and Suna. Even if she pretended to forget, or refused to recognize the odd, distorted fragments of memories during her waking hours, dreams flooded her mind with images of the past that Hitori couldn't normally place while she was conscious. These old memories she wanted to so badly to bury, and push away from her mind.

Little by little she had become more successful at it, and she certainly never grew more curious about the Sand village. Now, she was only curious about the boy that was to be protected, since doing so had become her mission. Certainly there would be some there, including Gaara himself, who would deny that he needed the protection at all, but that wasn't her concern. Danzou had ordered this, and she would die fulfilling the mission he'd given her, if her life was the required price. Hopefully, this Kazekage would turn out to be worth her life, but she had serious doubts as to whether that could be true, or not.

Tomorrow would be a long day.

Her eyes, which had drifted closed as Yomi's voice faded into a soothing background noise, suddenly flew open again as the words he was speaking registered in her mind. "The only person who had ever loved or cared about Gaara tried to kill him and asked him to 'please die'…" His words stuttered to a halt, as even Yomi was given pause by what he'd just read. Their eyes met and held for a long moment, each wondering as those words repeated over and over again in their minds. Hitori closed her eyes again, and allowed this information to mix with the rest drifting in her thoughts, wondering exactly what Danzou had dropped her into. Maybe Yomi had been right. This certainly didn't sound like it was going to be anything pretty in the end.

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Well, that's it's for the first chapter, guys! Whatcha think? Continue?


	2. 無慈悲 Mercilessness

Hey guys, Amy here... I would just like to say, thank you for the hits on the story. I hope you're all enjoying it. **DON'T WORRY**, favored characters will appear in the next chapter. Well, at least there will be more appearances. Since this is a long story, we sort of have to stretch out these chapters so that you know the characters a little bit better. Please enjoy!

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Moon's Light, Reality's Dream  
月の光、うつつの夢  
Chapter Two - **無慈悲** (_Mercilessness_)

温室崩れのPrince  
_You're Prince of a ruined glass house  
_ 後頭部にシヤンデリア  
_with a chandelier behind your head._

"Oji-san," Ishida stood with his hands on his hips, squinting skeptically from behind his monkey-like mask at the small carriage containing the disappointingly small amount of cargo the two teams of Anbu were to safeguard en route to Hoshigakure. The old man holding the reins to the horses in his slightly shaking hands turned slowly to glance down at the young ninja, his warm smile causing even more lines to crease his aged, weatherworn face. Everything about the young Anbu, from his nonchalant stance, to the disrespectful tone of his voice made Nisei cringe behind her own mask, her hand twitching to discipline him. How did this obvious simpleton ever make it out of the Ninja Academy, when it was apparent he couldn't even remember the smallest parts of his training? Who in their right mind would have accepted such a halfwit into Anbu in the first place? Her eyebrows rose further as his voice, incredibly, carried on. "What's so important about this shipment?"

To make matters worse, Ayu then stepped up beside him, her jittery, much too high pitched laughter not fooling anyone, except maybe that old man. Fooling him wouldn't be so hard, since he seemed like someone who was lost, in every sense of the word. Nisei couldn't help but frown as yet another of her charges broke the same cardinal rule. Ayu's voice came out as shaky as her laughter. "What he means to say is, 'It is a pleasure to be protecting you. We hope to get you to Hoshigakure as soon as possible and without trouble'." A stiff, curt little bow followed these words, and Nisei felt her eyes rolling in her head, and heat starting to rise slowly in her cheeks. They had to go and prove just what incompetent morons they were, right in front of Kouki-san. It was only to be expected, really. Had Nisei honestly expected to get through this first mission with her team without experiencing any embarrassment whatsoever at their incompetence? If she had, she must've been dreaming.

Finally the old man laughed softly, the mirth wheezing out of his chest in soft, short gasps."Such cute masks…"

Following those words, Nisei turned a glare on her three team members, as if daring one of them to speak again. After giving them a long moment, and a mile of rope to hang themselves with, she grabbed Ishida's arm with one hand, and Ayu's with the other, none too gently dragging them both towards the back of the carriage. "Day One. What rule were you required to memorize? Do not speak while you're on a mission. If you absolutely need to run your mouth, then you will speak to me and me only." Each of them received a shake after this and she released Ayu, nodding at her and gesturing back towards the others nearby, turning her attention fully on Ishida as his team mate darted off relieved to be escaping the lecture, however deserved it was. "And you, Ishida. You were not paying attention at all, were you? This small shipment is filled with weapons and it would be very dangerous if anyone else got their hands on them. Especially the embittered rogue ninja who would not hesitate to kill you for what's stored in these boxes."

His face dropped and he bowed his head, knowing that he'd messed up yet again. "Hopefully no one will try to attack..."

"We don't waste our time with hope. We just ensure that any who try, fail." Nisei said, keeping her voice flat, and without the harsh undertone of annoyance that was trying so hard to creep in. Hoping that rogue ninja wouldn't attack wasn't a characteristic of Anbu, either. Anbu wanted to annihilate these rogues altogether. There was never mercy granted for those who chose to prey on the weak instead of protecting them. Though most of these rogues were complete idiots, anyone should learn after awhile that messing with the Anbu is no laughing matter, even these creeps who were only out for a good meaningless fight, or the chance to steal something of great value. Yes, the Anbu methods were harsh, but harsh was required to send the message out loud and clear. Nisei jerked her head towards the front of the now moving group and watched her young student dart off to take up his guard position while she settled into her own, at the rear. She knew better than to waste time hoping there wouldn't be an attack, choosing instead to prepare for the inevitability of one.

The relative quiet of the forest around her was already oddly suspicious . Of course, after you're so mercilessly and thoroughly trained to find everything suspicious, a flower out of place, a blade of grass bent the wrong way, a tiny scratch in the bark of a tree - these simple things would all look positively murderous. Birds carried on their cheerful cacophony in the treetops, while reptiles slithered into and out of the shadows, their passage marked silently by the waving of the grass and undergrowth of the ancient, sleeping forest. Insects continuously buzzed and hummed, darting through the entire spectrum of her view, creating their own orchestral counterpoint to the birdsong surrounding them. Each of these tiny details was important in and of it's own right. Even the smallest imbalance of nature was obvious to a ninja, even more so to an Anbu. Nisei kept her eyes and ears open, constantly alert to an increased degree of awareness due to her inexperienced, and so far nearly dangerously incompetent, team being out here, as well. Therefore, she wasn't even slightly surprised to find she suddenly had company.

Kouki landed gracefully right beside the Anbu captain, his black cloak billowing out in the gently tugging fingers of the wind, as he effortlessly matched his pace with the now steadily moving caravan. "I truly do feel bad for you, Nisei, being stuck with the youngest group of Anbu."

"Are you sympathizing with my current circumstances, Kouki-san?" Nisei chose not to stop the small smile that formed on her usually passive face. The mask hid all but the crinkling of her eyes, anyway. This wasn't even close to the first mission she'd been on with Kouki. He was a higher rank than her, having already been an Anbu captain when she was still just an operative, and he was damned proud of the work he'd done in the past. As he should be. Every much needed assassination, every Bingo book betrayer he had managed to capture, every mission he'd been sent on had turned out to be an overwhelming success. He'd made an honorable name for himself, and Nisei felt a small stab to her heart as each of her failures flashed almost tauntingly through her mind. Next to this man, she couldn't help but still see herself as not much more than a dumb kunoichi. Nisei knew that she was stronger now, much stronger, but that feeling didn't change much within her own mind.

Kouki tilted his head to the side, and she almost wished she could see his face. The feeling lasted for all of a moment before he spoke again. "Should I not sympathize with you? We were friends before Anbu. Do I stop caring about your well being because our situations have changed?" His head turned back to regarding the young ninja around them, instead of riveting that dangerous gaze solely on her. "When does that ever stop? When should it?"

"This is very unlike you." She answered quietly, drawing his gaze back to hers, nearly drowning her in that pair of dazzling blue eyes. She held them for as long as she could manage before turning away again. "Thank you for your concern, Kouki-san, but I feel that it isn't necessary."

She felt those eyes as if they burned into her while he studied her for a long moment. In her younger days, Nisei had an unfortunate tendency to give herself, her feelings and thoughts, away on many occasions, all too easily. At this moment, she couldn't help but wonder if she'd just done it yet again. She knew she certainly wasn't fine, and she hadn't been fine for awhile, but prided herself on keeping that hidden from those around her. When the fire of anger had started to flicker out within her, a hollow, empty sadness had slowly risen to take it's place. As was starting to happen all too frequently lately, memory returned to assault her with images and feelings she wished to leave buried in the quickly receding past. Kouki watched her cautiously, out of the corner of his eye, many of the same memories now rising to haunt him, as well.

Nisei had no business being on that mission back then, and it had changed something within her. He didn't have to close his eyes to see the image of her coming back without her Anbu Captain, none other than the great Hatake Kakashi. Kouki had watched in silence as Nisei wandered out of the forest, dazed and taking small, unsteady steps until she couldn't possibly hold herself up anymore. The lost look she gave to the rest of the squad faded into an obscured blur before she collapsed.

Kouki's eyes searched the ground, as if he could still see Nisei's unconscious body there, the way he found her that day. He was the first to reach her, leaning down to gently lift her up, resting her against the nearest tree. The long, black strands of her hair were sticky with blood under his fingers, and with a start, he realized it was her own. His hand trembled as he raised it, taking her wrist and pulling her hand slowly away from the right side of her face. There, just along the curve of her cheekbone and following the shape of her eye, was a deep, clean gash still oozing a few thick, crimson drops. The missing piece of her Anbu mask proved to be what had sliced her. It had been broken off of her face.

_'__Kakashi…'_

That one word, and the harsh, hurt sound of the whisper she voiced it in, triggered the connection for Kouki. Even as the stunning realization dawned in his mind, Kouki knew that the Copy Ninja had a reason behind everything he did. Those reasons were just never simple, and rarely apparent at a first glance. Attacking Nisei out of nowhere didn't seem at all like something that he would do. It was something much deeper than anything Kouki could probably ever guess at. The next morning, after that blazing war, that unforgettable mission, was the last time Hatake Kakashi joined in any Anbu activities as an Anbu. In fact, the very next day he had resigned. Nisei's attempt to make him stay had resulted in the strike which led to her scar, a mark that would never be a trophy, like a battle scar, but only a monument to her failure. Obviously, she had foolishly tried to fight him. But that on it's own, couldn't be the only cause. There had to be more to it, an imperative reason as to why Kakashi's presence was so needed. The obvious one, that he was the best Captain in Anbu history, just wasn't enough. Something more, something personal, lay behind the scar on Nisei's face, and the shadow of sadness haunting her eyes.

Ishida was doing his best to remain focused on his surroundings, but knowing he was under Nisei's watchful eye, and now that of Kouki san as well, made it just that much harder. More than anything he wanted to prove to his sensei, hell to everyone, that he and his team were ready to be Anbu. He always knew when Nisei's attention was on him, could feel that golden eyed gaze as if it was boring into the back of his brain. She always watched him like a predatory bird, a hawk waiting for that one mistake that would leave him open to become her prey. Ichida knew his new sensei didn't hate him, it couldn't have been hate, but constant failure wasn't a pleasant feeling. At least he was allowed to be in the front. It wasn't easy, but in spite of his overly relaxed nature, he'd never expected it to be any different. Maybe there was hope for him yet.

The boy stopped suddenly, hearing a new sound, a subtle change in the air around him. His chakra was burning furiously as his eyes picked up what the other Anbu had so far failed to see. A moment later the reins in the old man's hands were sliced clean through, and the responsible kunai impaled itself in a tree with an ominous thudding sound. The blade had barely missed Ishida's face. If he hadn't stopped when he did... He pushed that thought aside, already springing into motion, his hand closing around the kunai and yanking it free. It wasn't fear that drove him, no. There was no room for fear within him at the moment, merely purpose. He drew his arm back, the well trained muscles responding perfectly, and returned the offending kunai to it's owner, point first. The shadowy figure deeper within the forest moved suddenly at the proximity of the blindly accurate throw, giving away his position exactly as Ishida wanted him to. There was no time for petty self congratulation though as he scanned the forest, his breathing unlabored, letting his training take over.

Kouki looked at Nisei for a brief moment, already knowing that the best idea would be to split their force, his group taking the shipment and Nisei's staying to hold off the attackers. He called to his team, as he pulled himself up next to the driver and excused himself for shifting their places.

"Ibuki, point. Hikaru, rear. Minase, stay behind me and keep to as much cover as possible, ne?" He didn't wait for any of them to answer, turning instead to regard Nisei as his perfectly trained team responded accordingly. "Nisei... you've got this?" His words rang out even as he spurred the horses forward. He smirked, accepting her annoyed and lazy thumbs up to be a 'Yes', as he turned his azure eyes back to the road before him, urging even more speed out of the surprised and frightened horses.

Nisei watched Kouki and his team, her golden eyes narrowing and darkening as the carriage rapidly moved up the road, it's progress already becoming obscured by a thick cloud of dust. This was the moment she'd been both waiting for, and dreading. A hostile encounter would ultimately prove if her students were capable of what Konohagakure required of them. As always, it would be trial by blood - the only true test of a ninja's readiness to be Anbu.

"There's at least ten, maybe fifteen," Ishida said in a low, quiet voice. Nisei almost wanted to pat him on the back, or even pet his wild hair, but she managed to restrain her pride as her voice matched the tone of his own.

"And what do you plan to do about it?" Even though her mask was still firmly in place, Ishida spared a brief glance back at her, as if he knew she was smiling beneath it. Ayu still stood much too close to Koji, practically hiding behind him. The medic Anbu were the weakest, but that was no reason to show it, to act the part of a coward. Nisei found it to be the typical response in the face of the first encounter with a real battle, though. Ishida stayed within good range, keeping his eyes focused on the trees, and Nisei knew that he was still counting and calculating. Apparently, he'd kept a good brain hidden somewhere under that riotous mass of ridiculous hair, behind that mischievous pair of laughing brown eyes. Koji was obviously born to be elite, but at this moment, Nisei looked fondly to Ishida as the one who would truly prove something today. Perhaps another Kouki lived somewhere inside of him.

Ishida took one step back, his weapon already drawn and held lightly, yet confidently in his hand as Koji moved closer to him, the green haired boy reaching his arm back for his own ninjato. Their eyes met and held for a long moment before Ishida turned to Nisei, his head bowing forward slightly.

"Nisei sensei, step back and let us show you how we've been practicing as a team." The Anbu captain had no sooner opened her mouth to reply than five men charged wildly at them from between the trees. Without hesitation, Ishida and Koji moved forward to meet them, weapons flowing fluidly through the air, their bodies responding perfectly at every moment. Nisei kept her eyes glued to the forest, knowing more men hid within, and was about to bark an order when a sudden movement within the trees caught her eye, and the brief flash of a particularly recognizable figure nearly stunned her.

Suzuki Akira, the notorious rogue assassin straight out of the Bingo Book, was the one leading this attack. They were in for much more than any of them had bargained for. Nisei's new found faith in her team began to waver just a little as her mind set furiously to work.

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Hitori stepped out of the Anbu building with her black cloak around her, the hood pulled up over her startling titian hair leaving just her new raccoon mask visible to anyone who might happen glance at her. Danzou told her she was to be undercover, and she'd decided to start that immediately. Almost no one knew of the new mask, and covering up her all too recognizable hair would render her sufficiently anonymous. A swift glance to the sky confirmed yet another day of mild Konoha weather, and Hitori knew that Suna's weather would be very different, and worse than it ever was in this sleepy village. She never did pay much attention to such small things, but she couldn't help wondering about them now because they suddenly directly affected her. As of the moment, she wanted to figure out how long she could run without having to stop at a tea house along the way. Getting to the Sand as soon as possible was definitely the highest priority. Traveling had always seemed a more troublesome thing than it was worth to her. The run itself would be a strain on her toned muscles, and she welcomed the challenge, wondering if she could shorten a two day journey to just one. She didn't doubt her abilities in the slightest. The only time she ever rested on a mission was when she was with a team, when it was demanded by protocol.

"Hitori-chan." That all too familiar voice assaulted her just as she was about to pass through the wide open doors leading into and out of Konoha proper. Of course, it was Yomi. He leaned his back lazily against a tree just to the inside of those doors, his arms resting lightly over his chest and one foot propped against the trunk. As he moved to join her, his arms uncrossed, his hands out almost in a gesture meant to imply helplessness. Hitori stopped and regarded him with absolute patience, her malachite eyes meeting his smoky topaz ones while she waited. A long moment of silence passed between them while she wondered exactly what her erstwhile partner was up to. He had piqued her curiosity, though his childish laughter only managed to annoy her a little. The last thing she wanted right now was another delay."Danzou-sama requested that I escort you to Sunagakure."

"No, he didn't," she quickly snapped back as she walked past him, striding between the heavily guarded, highly secured doors, her feet carrying her slowly, but steadily along the well worn path. In spite of having caught him out in a lie, she knew that Yomi wouldn't be leaving her anytime soon. Danzou would never ask another Anbu to 'escort' her anywhere, and she briefly wondered if her partner thought she was stupid. Pushing the thought aside, she watched him with a concealed look of annoyance. He was walking with his arms behind his back, looking everywhere but at her.

"If you don't stop staring at me like that, I might start blushing." Yomi rolled his eyes at her expression, not that he could see much with her mask over her face, but he always imagined that blank façade whenever he received no answer, no rise at all from his seemingly emotionless partner. "Let's discuss, hm? Ahhh, the days of youth. You know, I was often perceived as the idiot of the bunch."

"Not much has changed-"

Before Hitori could finish her sentence, Yomi's short laughter cut her off, followed by slow, dramatic clapping. "Well done, Hitori! Insulting someone is funny." He wiped at his mask, pretending to remove tears, "I'm so proud of how this new side of you is developing. I must be such an amazing teacher." When that failed to even turn her eyes back to him, he chose to carry on as if he hadn't wanted an answer. "I've been thinking... You need to learn how to converse. Going into Suna, it's going to be expected of you to at least respond from time to time. That silent act of yours won't go over well at all. So.. let's practice, ne?" He eyed her sideways, noticing only a small twitch of her shoulders as if she was sighing beneath that concealing robe, and couldn't stop himself from grinning. "I'll take that as a yes." His hands rubbed together gleefully. "My old sensei was quite the bastard, you know. I heard you once went on a mission with him, before we were partners. How did that go? I bet it was exciting, seeing as he talks even less than you do, I think." A long moment of silence followed before he spoke again. "Ok, Hitori. In the art of conversation, when someone asks you a question, it's expected that you will reply."

"The mission went well." Her voice held no tone whatsoever and her gaze stayed locked on the road in front of them as she started moving faster, seeing her desire to shorten the trip from two days to one all but vanishing before her eyes. Yomi pretended he had tried to hold back the sigh that came from him, his head slowly shaking back and forth as he effortlessly matched his pace to her now faster one.

"Sometimes, it's also nice to offer details of your own when you reply. For example, how did he rate you? When he filed his final report on me to Danzou-sama, he had all sorts of delightful things to say about me, things I took in the highly complimentary nature I'm certain he intended." He fairly bounced beside her now, and she tried to suppress her irritation, knowing that he really was only trying to help her.

"Ruka-sama rated me 'highly competent'. I gave him the same rating as well." It was a struggle to force out what felt almost like a speech to her, and she nearly sighed again as Yomi's eyes widened, which had the effect of giving his monkey-like mask an even more comedic appearance. Then he whistled softly, expressing his incredulousness at the information she'd imparted, or how much she'd said. Either, or both, could be true.

"Wow, that's high praise from that evil, giant bastard!" He struck a thoughtful pose as he pondered for a moment. "I believe his report on me said I was a disgrace to the ninja name, not even remotely fit to be an Anbu operative, and the only truly useful purpose I could ever serve would be to clean up the streets after festivals, if I truly wanted to be of good use to my village." Soft laughter bubbled almost musically out of him before he continued on. "He also recommended that perhaps we would all be better served if I should just disappear entirely. Ahh, remembering training days is always so nostalgic." The sounds of crickets chirping happily nearby seemed much louder in the quiet following his last statement before he sighed heavily. "Now, it's your turn to volunteer something. Why don't you try asking me a question, or speaking of one of your own memories without prompting?" His voice raised ever so slightly in pitch and volume at the end, and it was just enough to cover another sigh from her.

"I have nothing to say, Yomi san." Her fingers twitched irritably and the silence stretched yet another long moment before she decided to at least try. "Actually, I do have a question. Does silence bother you so much?"

"Silence doesn't bother me in the slightest, Hitori chan. I just enjoy talking." Yomi's eyes scanned the thinning forest around them before turning down to the bag he started rummaging around in. He swore softly under his breath a few times, and at one point pulled his hand out and shook it fiercely before shoving it back inside, finally coming out with a long, sand colored scarf which he held out to her. "Here. You'll need this in Suna." She reached out to take the object from him, and her steps slowed as odd, random fragments of blurry memories assaulted her at the sight of it. Part of her remembered once wearing something like this, having never stepped outside without it wound around her head, neck and shoulders. "It will keep you shielded from the wind and sandstorms." Yomi's voice had taken a serious turn, his tone going somber. "This mission worries me."

"Yomi san..." He stopped her before she had a chance to say anything more.

"I know your arguments already, and I won't deny that you're Danzou's best. There's not a single doubt in my mind that you are Anbu's best, even. But..." He sighed as they halted completely and stood regarding each other in the falling twilight around them. "This mission is sending you into a very dangerous situation, and the Sand's Kazekage is a dangerous man. It's natural for me to worry because... you're not just my partner, Hitori chan. You're my friend." Before she could even think of replying, he turned away again. "Come on. Let's get moving or you'll never get there." Having said everything he felt he needed to for now, he took off running with the speed his tiny frame gave no indication he could ever possess. With his words tumbling through her surprised mind, Hitori stuffed the scarf into her own bag and darted off after him.

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Blood stings when it drips into your eyes. This was something Ishida hadn't known before today, but he was certain at this point that it was something he would never forget. Was it his own blood or someone else's? He might never know. The point being, it stung and made his eyes water, causing the already blurry vision of the enemy in front of him to waver in a way that was seriously starting to piss him off. His ninjato darted and stabbed out before him, slinging crimson drops in a grisly shower when he sliced it through the air. The blade was so sharp, so keen that his muscles barely detected the resistance when it met the throat of his latest attacker and parted it effortlessly. Jumping back, he nimbly avoided that warm fountain of salty stickiness and spared a glance for Koji. The other youth's green hair was now a decidedly brownish color that gleamed wetly, and looked matted to his head. The grin he flashed at Ishida pulled oddly at the unbandaged, freely bleeding gash on his face. They'd all earned their new scars today. Ayu stood more to the rear throwing kunai and shuriken into the fray when possible. Some of those kunai had exploding tags attached to them that resulted in messy eruptions of entrails, and other fleshy bits, that covered the ground beneath their feet in a dangerous, slippery wet litter.

Nisei had her own hands full, engaged in close combat with Suzuki Akira. So far he'd managed to parry every strike of her ninjato with his own well used katana, and they were currently standing nearly nose to nose, their blades locked between them as he laughed mockingly at her.

"What will you do now, little Anbu? Your partner has left you, and taken the best of the team with him, it appears." His ragged laughter came again, seeming almost an assault on her in and of itself. She responded with only a sneer before shoving him backwards and bringing her blade around in a fast arc, the glimmering, silvery steel aiming straight for where his neck met his shoulder. He dodged to the side but was unable to entirely avoid the strike, taking a small amount of damage to his arm. "This kitten has claws!" He exclaimed as he danced a little further away from her, blood rapidly staining down his sleeve. Nisei circled in the opposite direction, keeping her senses trained on everything around her even as she kept her eyes pinned on the man she was fighting. Concern for her students flashed fleetingly through her mind before she pushed it away with a mental growl. Now was the time to prove themselves. She wouldn't always be around to protect them, but forcing herself to let go was much harder than she'd thought it would be.

Ishida saw Koji out of the corner of his eye, running hell bent towards him as he jerked his weapon from the chest of the man in front of him. Knowing exactly what his team mate intended, Ishida bent forward at the last moment, grunting softly as one of Koji's feet landed firmly in the middle of his back and he used it to push off, seeming to fly into the three startled rogues in front of them. In spite of the blood and gore, the very real danger, and the seriousness of the situation they were embroiled in, Ishida couldn't stop the laughter that came out of him. Koji made flying look awkward as hell, but his deadly landing on that trio of ninja was certainly effective. Apparently, Ishida had something to learn when it came to counting the number of enemies because more than fifteen men had appeared, and he was starting to wonder about his sensei, when he finally spotted her crossing blades with the man who was undoubtedly the leader of this ambush. His line of thought was rudely cut off when a blade passed mere inches from his still blurred eyes, and he leapt back with an oath before springing forward into his own attack, and unfortunately missing the other ninja creeping up on him from behind. Ayu's warning shout came too late, reaching him only after he felt the cold bite of steel digging into the back of his thigh. The coldness passed quickly in the wake of the searing hot gout of blood that shot out when the man jerked the weapon free with an evil grin plastered on his dirty, unshaven face. That look lasted for only a split second before being replaced by a look of shock as he toppled forward into the grass with three kunai sticking out of the middle of his back. Ishida nearly dropped, but somehow managed to stay on his feet as Ayu darted forward and started wrapping a bandage tightly around his leg above the wound.

"Don't push it," she hissed softly as she tied the ends together. "You should be able to stay up a bit longer but..." Her words trailed off at the look of grim determination in Ishida's eyes before he turned to re-engage their enemies.

"Thanks... for all of it," he said over his shoulder as he moved away from her. Ayu bit her lip as she backed up again, reaching into her bag for more kunai and finally freeing her own ninjato. Medic or not, it was all too obvious it was past time for her to join this battle in earnest. She glanced distractedly towards her sensei before following Ishida into the fray.

This bastard was sincerely starting to warp her last nerve, Nisei decided as she closed with Suzuki yet again, this time smiling behind her mask in satisfaction as her ninjato slid down his blade to bite into the fingers wrapped around the hilt of his katana. His face barely changed expression and she had only a moment to wonder why before arms closed tightly around her, pinning her own arms to her sides and causing her to lose her weapon, which landed uselessly in the grass at her feet. "I suppose you think you've won now?" Even she was surprised at the calm tone of her voice as she relaxed in her captor's grasp, making her body into a movement hindering dead weight.

"No, I don't think I've won." Suzuki leaned closer to her as one hand reached slowly for her mask, intending to tear it off her face. His other hand held his blade high, poised to strike once the porcelain was gone. "I know I..." He never got to finish his sentence because a kunai suddenly appeared sticking out of his chest just above his shoulder. Nisei felt the man holding her captive grunt before his arms loosened from her and both men collapsed to the ground.

"Miss me?" Kouki's voice was as unmistakable as the bird beaked mask he wore, and Nisei found herself feeling irrational anger at the unexpected, and unwanted, rescue. "Isn't that Suzuki Akira? From the Bingo Book?" His foot nudged at the man groaning on the ground before he knelt down to secure him with the cords he pulled from his bag. "Your students are doing quite well out there, you know." Her lack of response made him wonder exactly what he'd done wrong as he wrapped the cords tightly around Suzuki's body, pulling them tight before knotting them. Kouki rose slowly and turned to regard Nisei who was glaring at him with her hands on her hips.

"I didn't need to be rescued, you know," she huffed before turning partially away from him. "This fight isn't over yet." Without waiting for him to reply, she lifted her ninjato and savagely attacked a nearby rogue who was charging at Koji's unprotected back. The feeling of the muscles in the back of the ninja's knees severing at the kiss of her blade almost brought a grim smile to her face, but her anger with Kouki prevented it from fully forming. "Bastard," she muttered under her breath before glancing around to see if there was anyone left to kill.

Ishida's breath came in short, heavy gasps as he rested on one knee with his head hanging down just a little. Aside from the wound in his thigh, every other hit he'd taken in this battle had been minor, and he counted himself beyond lucky. He nearly groaned seeing one of the few remaining rogue ninja charging towards him, and started to rise, but his vision was suddenly blocked by one long expanse of ivory thigh. His gaze slowly traveled up as the rogue hit the ground and he looked into a pair of pale blue eyes behind a neko mask. For a long moment he couldn't decide if he was looking at a man or a woman, but when the figure stretched a hand down to him, he realized it was definitely male.

"Ishida, right?" Somehow, Ishida could just hear the grin in the other man's voice as he allowed him to help him slowly back to his feet. "I'm Ibuki." A long moment passed. An awkward moment for Ishida that was interrupted only by soft, feminine laughter.

"Don't worry. He has that effect on everyone." Hikaru tipped her inu masked head sideways and leaned one arm casually on Koji's shoulder. "You guys did great. Where's your medic?" Ishida slowly raised his arm and pointed to Ayu walking slowly back over with Nisei and nervously checking the Anbu captain over for wounds. Kouki and Minase walked slowly out of the trees behind them, Kouki carrying the bound form of Suzuki Akira slung casually over one shoulder. Nisei stopped before her team, and patted Ishida softly on the head.

"You did well today, Ishida kun... Koji kun... Ayu chan. I'm proud of all three of you." Her voice sounded as tired as she suddenly felt. Slowly, she turned away from the others. "Let's get home, ne? I don't know about you, but I sure as fuck need a long, hot bath." Without waiting for anyone else, she started taking slow, measured steps in the direction of Konoha. What the hell was with Kouki lately? It seemed like every time she turned around, he was there, even when he wasn't supposed to be. Nisei certainly didn't want him there, him and his sterling reputation, his mile long list of accomplishments. His perfect damned blue eyes. A growl of frustration started to well up within her and she only barely managed to suppress it. It almost seemed as if Kouki was developing a white knight complex where she was concerned, and that just wouldn't do. Somehow, she was going to have to figure out a way to put a swift and permanent stop to it. Lifting one hand slowly, she brushed at the dirt and dust on her arm and sighed. She'd figure out what to do about Kouki after her much deserved bath.

-----

"Lady Hokage."

The blond haired Sannin sat at her desk, her head resting heavily on her crossed arms. She had pulled an all-nighter, which consisted almost entirely of tedious reading over the mountain of documents that always seemed to rise anew, as if it was her own personal, daily phoenix of paperwork. So much was happening lately, and with Naruto's sudden return grave situations seemed to blossom like flowers after a good spring rain. The last report, which was still locked tightly in her grasp, rambled with rather explicit detail about the Akatsuki, and their vicious ploys to capture each biju. They would eventually come for Naruto, as well. She had to start worrying about his future, but she also had to take into consideration what it was that he wanted, which was to bring his rival best friend, Sasuke, back to the village. Shizune's small laugh finally penetrated her thoughts, drawing her somewhat unwillingly to full consciousness.

"Forgive me. She does like to sleep a lot."

Slowly, Tsunade's topaz eyes opened. She had been pulled out of her thoughts to stare at some random Anbu, and completely ignore her aide. If Tsunade had any ounce of shame, she would have pulled herself together, but she honestly didn't much care. Everyone seemed aware of her occasionally lazy demeanor. She did her best to straighten herself in her seat, her back instantly making her regret the swiftness of that motion by delivering a sharp stab of pain. She bit her tongue not to curse loudly in front of the small company, and gave a curt nod for the Anbu to say what he needed to. He bowed low before starting to speak.

"Danzou has made a move."

"Ah," She said lowly, her pink lips turning up into a smirk. It made sense, especially with her just finding out that the Akatsuki were on the move again. "I knew he would, sooner or later. Please, elaborate… What has he done now?"

"Tsunade-sama," Shizune was immediately in front of the Hokage's line of view. Tsunade met her assistant's dark gaze, and saw the obvious concern there. "This is bad, especially now. The situation with Naruto..."

Irritated, Tsunade rolled her chair to the side and regarded the Anbu with her sharp gaze. "Go on."

Shizune's hurt expression disappeared as quickly as it had appeared, then she glanced at the Anbu kneeling on the floor. He slowly raised his head and continued on with his information. "Two Anbu from Danzou's Root organization were spotted leaving Konohagakure just a little while ago. The shorter of the two wore a monkey mask. We're not entirely sure who either of them were. The taller one was fully cloaked and wore a raccoon mask unlike anything I've ever seen. There's no doubt it came from the artistry, but I do not know what it stands for, and neither does anyone else..."

Shizune spoke before Tsunade could open her mouth, "Should we send out a team to track and follow them?"

Tsunade cast yet another irritated look at her assistant, as if in reprimand for the interruption, and then shook her head while she brought a hand up to cover over her slight yawn, thinking as quickly as her tired brain would allow. "No. We won't be so open about it, at least not yet." She placed her hand down and firmly gripped the side of her desk, pushing herself back in her chair. "Anbu, I think that Danzou and I should have a talk. Please go inform him that I wish to speak to him. Immediately."

-------

That's the end of the chapter. I hope you're all liking the story so far!


	3. 無力 Powerless

**Author's Note:** Hey! It's Lisa. I'm very glad to post up the appearance of Gaara and Kakashi. It's going to be a really long story, so it has to start off slow like this. It'll pay off in the end, to become a strong story. This story receives less hits, and no reviews, but I'm not giving up. I know when a story, an idea is good enough. Thank you!

Moon's Light, Reality's Dream  
月の光、うつつの夢  
Chapter Three - 無力 (_Powerless_)

感覚は夢を浮上してるようで  
_ This sensation is like a floating dream_  
想像上の痛みなどより  
_ It is more than just imagined pain._

Once her eyes fell on the man in front of her, Tsunade began seriously doubting how long she could remain calm. The more she looked at Danzou and his smug, overconfident face, the more she envisioned just how satisfying it would be to slam her fist into that face. Repeatedly. This man had always held such great loathing for her grandfather, and now that feeling had shifted to an ever growing hatred for her. Perhaps it was childish, but his obvious contempt for her didn't leave her much inclined to warm, fuzzy feelings towards him. She had only the small satisfaction of knowing she did have the one thing he so desperately wanted, a specific title that left this obvious traitor without the power he sincerely thought he deserved. He already had more than enough power to make Tsunade shift uncomfortably in her seat whenever she thought about it. If Danzou should ever become Hokage, that day would spark true fear for Konohagakure. Though, as long as she remained alive and strong, there would never be a chance for him to lay claim to the title of Hokage. For that reason alone, she was determined to hold the chair until someone worthy, someone she could believe in, appeared. For all of his posturing and posing, it was impossible to believe that Danzou had Konoha's best interests in mind. The only things that interested him were the schemes and desires locked in the shriveled black thing he called a heart.

"Tsunade-Hime." That was the name Danzou used to get away with not addressing her by the title of Hokage. His casual, short tone indicated that this chilling man was almost as thrilled to see her as she was to see him. Tsunade met his eyes with a look that would have shot daggers, if it could. "You've called upon me in such a haste. I wonder, is something the matter?"

"We specifically agreed that when you send out a member from Anbu Root that you would first consult me. I'm certain I'm not mistaken in this matter." She kept her voice even, trying not to raise it unnecessarily in spite of her complete and utter dislike for him. "You sent out two operatives today without my permission. Explain yourself."

Danzou's expression didn't waver in the slightest, as he'd obviously expected something like this to happen. The moment the summons to an audience with the Hokage was delivered to him, he'd almost certainly correctly guessed at the reason for it. He laughed gently, fake kindness oozing from him as he spoke. "Sunagakure has requested Anbu protection. Godaime Kazekage has been receiving many threats, as I'm sure you can imagine. I simply couldn't deny such a request. Forgive me, Princess Tsunade. I had every intention of informing you immediately." There seemed to be amusement glinting in his evil, dark eyes which shifted slightly to the left as he bowed his head. The movement was the smallest forward inclination, barely enough to keep him just short of outright rudeness. "I do have the letter that came requesting assistance."

Tsunade didn't underestimate him, nor did she believe he had the nerve to directly lie to her. Danzou was a lot of unpleasant things, but stupid wasn't one of them. The letter would read exactly what he had just said, though one and one were definitely not adding up to two, here. She took the paper from him regardless, barely restraining herself from snatching it rudely out of his hand. Suna asked for aid from Konohagakure Anbu, but from Root? Could anyone in Suna even really know much about the shadowy Anbu Root organization when so few even in Konoha did? She dropped her eyes from his to the letter and skimmed it carefully. The date on the paper was from months ago. Of course, he 'simply couldn't deny such a request' months later. Tsunade let the letter fall from her fingers, and then slowly crossed her arms. She wanted his real motives, but she knew that she would fail at getting them. Direct confrontation never worked with Danzou. He was much too good at covering his tracks, using his slippery nature to hide the things he didn't want discovered. No, this was a matter that she would have to send her own Anbu to look into.

"You waited months to respond to Baki's letter," She leaned in across her desk a little, watching Danzou smug smile grow a little more. "Why?"

"Sadly, these things sometimes fall through the cracks. At the time the letter was received, I had my best operative already out on an important mission. Besides, better late than never." The simple response made the Sannin shift uncomfortably in her seat, her eyes flashing angrily. His method might have been indirect, but to Tsunade, Danzou had basically just flat out said he was up to no good. She ended the unsettling conversation with a nod and a quick glance to Shizune. The dark haired woman took the hint and turned Danzou, bowing respectfully, even if she did dislike the man as much as her master did. They both had all the reasons they needed to fuel that intense feeling of distrust.

"Thank you, are dismissed."

Tsunade smirked a little at the overly pleasant tone Shizune used to issue what must've felt to Danzou like a blunt slap in the face. She kept her eyes directly off of his face, watching him only peripherally, and tried not to feel the satisfaction that rose from the sour twist to his mouth as he turned to go. He didn't bother to bow, nor did he speak again, choosing instead to simply vanish through the doorway. The Sannin didn't mind that very much, as her mind was immediately drawn to wondering which Anbu she should send out after Danzou's little ferrets. With a sigh she skimmed slowly through the list of operatives, already feeling a headache starting just behind her eyes.

Shizune practically hovered over the front of Tsunade's desk with an obviously worried expression sharpening her soft features. It really didn't look right on her. She studied the niece of her late lover closely and felt an unpleasant squeezing sensation in her chest, as if feeling a fist there, locked tightly around her heart. The look on Shizune's face was beginning to match the same intense stare that Tsunade would rather forget at the moment. That look never sat well on Dan's face, either.

"Tsunade, we have to do something about Danzou." Tsunade almost smiled at Shizune's words. Almost. And then a sudden thought came to her.

"That much is quite clear. Tell me, is Nisei back from her last assignment?" Tsunade looked steadily at the woman whom she considered her closest friend, the only person she felt she trusted completely with any situation, no matter how sensitive. Shizune was also the only person who ever understood the clutter in Tsunade's head, especially when she was making decisions. She knew Shizune would argue against the request for Nisei, but she would fail at that argument long before she ever won it.

"Hai, Tsunade sama." Shizune's stance changed, her posture becoming stiff, and withdrawn as she straightened. "She and Kouki took the team out to deliver the shipment of-" She stopped herself, seeing Tsunade's pointed look. She knew all of that already. "They were ambushed by Suzuki Akira and his band of rogue ninja. No one was seriously injured. The boy, Ishida, took a nasty wound to his leg, but it'll heal without any problems. Sakura chan started working on it straight away."

"I'm glad to hear all went well. And what of Nisei's condition?" Tsunade's voice was sharp. She knew Shizune was dancing around the main point of the conversation, and she chose to let the other woman know of her awareness. "I know that you wish to protect Nisei's feelings. But her tactical skills, her keen senses, and even her experiences in the past all contribute to what we need right now. Send for her, and inform Kouki that he is to pick up Nisei's team." She lowered her eyes back to the paperwork in front of her, wordlessly signaling that the conversation was over and she now simply expected to be obeyed. Without question.

"It's not that I wish to protect her feelings!" Shizune's sudden outburst caused the Hokage to raise an eyebrow. "Even though you're looking at me like that, I'm telling you that you have my reasons all wrong. Nisei is too powerless when it comes to her emotions. I've seen it." Unfortunately, 'without question' almost never worked on Shizune.

"So not only are you concerned about Nisei as a person, but you are also concerned about her feelings," Tsunade's soft laughter seemed to echo through the room. "I know that you mean well and your heart is in the right place, but do not underestimate Nisei. There is a reason why she is an Anbu captain. I saw to it. I've allowed her a break, giving her these young operatives to train, but now it's time for her to start doing some field work. She needs it."

"But…" Shizune's voice cut off abruptly as Tsunade raised both her hand and her eyebrow, signally that the conversation was now definitely at it's end. Their eyes met, locking in frigid glares. Shizune faltered and looked away first.

The Hokage never loses the argument.

------

Hitori leaped quickly up the high, rocky promontory followed like a mirror image by Yomi. The odd looking pair crouched side by side as they surveyed the miles of desert in front of them. Less than ten minutes before, a brief, but ferocious sandstorm had hit suddenly, barely leaving them enough time to shelter in a cave at the base of the rocks they were currently perched upon. Sunagakure wasn't very far off, not if they kept moving at the speed they'd been traveling with previously. The miles seemed like practically nothing after the years of missions across all sorts of terrain on foot. This journey wasn't anywhere near as tiring as some they'd been on. The two days travel had been easily trimmed by at least twelve hours. As she leapt back down into the sand, Hitori was thankful that Yomi was able to talk and keep up, even as his sandals sank and slid in the deep grains at every push against the soft surface.

"You're in quite a rush," He finally huffed out several miles later, still following closely next to her, and sounding only barely fatigued. If nothing else, Yomi was definitely a trooper. "When you arrive, are you just going to pull out Danzou's letter and wave it around, or will you actually have the nerve to hand it to the Sand's Kazekage yourself? I heard that he's pretty intimidating in person."

Hitori spared him a glance, but never slackened her pace. "I have never met such a person."

A leering image of Danzou flitted through Yomi's mind, but he pushed it away in irritation."You will, even if you are Anbu. Sure, you'll be able to hide it, but you won't be able to deny feeling it. It's a specific aura that the person gives off. It's the look in their eyes," Yomi's arms moved to better elaborate, caught up in his own words. "You've faced a lot of scary bastards in your days, but it'll be different when you feel it." 'Trust me on this one,' he added silently, swallowing hard against the lump that formed in his throat when he thought about what now lay ahead of his friend.

She didn't feel obligated to answer since she'd never personally experienced such a thing. Her mind was trained to be unemotional, and no matter how hard she tried, she couldn't even begin to imagine what intimidation felt like. Yomi kept his eyes on the terrain before them, but she could tell how tense he was by the lack of his usual grace of movement. For once, she actually wished she could think of something to say. As much as Hitori wanted to enhance her conversational skills, she felt completely incapable of doing so at the moment. The miles were slowly slipping by, and soon Yomi would be forced to turn back and leave her on her own. She couldn't help but feel something that must be a lot like apprehension. Yomi knew all about her lack of personality, and had obviously tried to help her overcome her 'failings.' Not that it was her job to appeal to the Kazekage's liking, but some things were expected, even from a Konoha Anbu. It was true that not many trusted the Anbu ninja from Root, mainly because of who the head of the organization was. It had never been a secret that they all functioned as Danzou's eyes, ears, and hands. Hitori knew she couldn't use that excuse to be distant, though. Doing so would accomplish nothing more than giving them another reason to distrust her, and her mission was looking difficult enough already.

"Ready?" Yomi asked, looking at Hitori for a long moment. Of course she was ready, and the look she shot him in return said as much. It was a stupid question to ask. No one in Anbu cared if you were ready or not. She gave a silent nod, and without looking back, continued on further towards the rocky outcropping just before the village itself.

Yomi crouched half-concealed behind a large rock, one hand resting lightly on the ground as he watched the guards stop Hitori at the entrance to Sunagakure. She retrieved the letter from within her sleeve and casually handed it over, making no sudden or threatening movements. He studied the looks on their faces, releasing his held breath in relief when they relaxed their posture a little, their less suspicious gazes following her as they stepped out of her way. A sigh tried to rise within him, but he choked it off. There was no reason to start feeling all melancholy now. Sure, their room would be empty when he returned to it, but even while Hitori was there, the room still sometimes felt just as empty and quiet. Though, he knew he would miss being able to run his mouth to someone who would listen and never interrupt him. At least he knew she was really listening, which was more than he could say of the walls. With one last glance back at his partner's diminishing figure, Yomi turned and ran hard, heading back towards Konoha.

The blue-black night sky had started slowly fading into the deep purple before the pink and gold explosion of dawn. It was cold in the village, but the temperature always dropped like that in the desert at this hour, she remembered somehow. Particles of sand brushed over her legs, and even they held a slight chill against her warm skin. It felt good after the long run. The almost unnatural quiet around her caused her to speed up a little, the soft soles of her shoes barely whispering through the sand under her feet. She didn't want to linger in the streets between these thin-walled houses where anyone might be able to hear her passage. Despite making her way quickly along the sandy paths, she did take her time to study over the buildings of the community. Sunagakure slept soundly, it seemed.

The Kazekage tower was located at the center of the village, spiraling up into the sky, and quite unlike anything Hitori was used to seeing in Konoha. One foot after the other, she slowly made her way cautiously forward. No one seemed to be patrolling this building, and she felt confusion rising in her mind. That was worst move that the sand shinobi could make, if they actually wished to adequately protect their Kazekage. Then again, she had more than enough reason to believe that the villagers did not fully respect Gaara, nor want him for their Kazekage. Maybe no one truly cared at all. She opened the large door with ease, wondering if her mission was going to being even too difficult for her, after all, and was met with a long, rocky stairwell.

Both of Hitori's hands met the door as she backed up wearing a look of grim determination and pushed off, sprinting up the staircase, conquering two at a time until she made it to the top. The quiet pre-dawn stillness only seemed to taunt her. It was always busy in Konoha, no matter what hour of the day or night. The sound of her tanto sliding free was barely a whisper as she pulled it from the sheath strapped to her back. She continued warily, with small, silent, measured steps. The first room she encountered was spacious and sparsely furnished, but obviously not the room she was looking for. She backed out into the hallway and began methodically searching, opening and softly closing each door, peeking inside and retreating again as she sought the Kage's study. Eventually the labyrinthine corridor took her the last room, and she came to an abrupt halt before it, wondering if the sound of her heartbeat was as loud outside of her head as it was within.

Her hand closed tightly around her weapon, the familiar weight reassuring her, before she twisted the door open slowly and stepped carefully inside the room. The wind whistled in softly through the tiny window above the Kazekage's chair as Hitori's eyes took in the dark surroundings. In spite of the fact that it was an obscenely plain room compared to the extravagance Tsunade displayed, there was no denying that she'd finally found it. Hitori could practically see Yomi in the back of her mind, clapping and smiling in the awkward way he had when he was trying very hard not to laugh, congratulating her for thinking of the word 'extravagance.'

Another breeze wafted through, and the sand brushed like an insect's wings across her legs once more. Everything about this place had her on edge. There was something different in the room now - a feeling, or perhaps a presence. The Anbu closed her eyes and sensed the chakra, but she couldn't tell where it originated. Suddenly, she felt tight pressure around her calf and her right leg was forcefully pulled out from under her, sending her sprawling backwards. The back of her head hit the wall with a climactic 'thunk'. Shaking it a little, and mentally swearing softly, she dug her nails into the wall to hold herself up. Her eyes roamed around the room, and still she saw no one, and nothing other than the sand that swirled lazily at her feet. A sudden thought bloomed in her mind and she narrowed her gaze at the golden grains. It was in the sand? Her jade eyes again searched for the one responsible, when the air itself seemed to flash and distort as something, someone moved towards her with incredible speed. The next thing she knew, the tanto was out of her hands and pressing against the raging pulse on the side of her neck.

"Who are you? More importantly, why are you here?" Somehow his voice was different than she expected - deeper, and softer. The tip of her stolen tanto cut into her skin, and she felt the pain like a sharp pinch. Obviously his patience was already running thin. "You made it past the doors. I want to know how."

Hitori was finally able to raise her head up enough to look back at her captor through the eyes of her Anbu mask, and found herself unable to speak, or even to move again. The words were trapped in her throat. This could be none other than Sabaku no Gaara. His wild mass of red hair stayed mostly in his face, especially on the right side, leaving his left more exposed. She tried desperately to remember the list of features that Yomi had gone over with her. Her eyes searched frantically, finally coming to rest the tattoo marked into the pale flesh of his forehead above his left eye, clearly reading 'love'. The dark tanuki-like rings around his dangerously narrowed, pale turquoise eyes were what caused her stare to linger. He looked absolutely furious.

Gaara moved his gaze slowly over her mask for a long moment, before his jaw clenched tightly and he found himself pulling at the bottom of the Anbu hood, then tearing the scarf away from the operative's face. A raccoon mask. Was that supposed to be something funny, something mocking? Someone sent to kill him while wearing the mask as a joke? He was offended already, that feeling only growing stronger as Shukaku's voice plagued his mind. It was incredibly hard to control the demon's urges, and Gaara had already slipped. The sharp, metallic tang of blood lingered in the air, even from just the tiny amount he'd spilled. His control had been improving steadily since his encounter with Naruto, but right now he wasn't sure if he could hold back. The tips of Gaara's fingers slid beneath his captive's chin, tilting the Anbu's face further up towards his, before slowly pulling up the mask.

"I…" Hitori's voice faltered, locking up in her throat again with that narrowed gaze now focused on her, taking her in. He tossed the mask to the side with seeming carelessness, the delicate porcelain breaking upon meeting the hard ground. Gaara wasn't amused, and apparently he was also beyond uninterested at this point.

"If you were an assassin, you would have at least tried to kill me by now. So, what is your purpose for being here?" He lowered his eyes to the floor, releasing her as he casually stood and walked over to his chair. She really hated this part, hated the powerless feeling that accompanied the act, as she knelt down on the floor and bowed respectfully at the man who had just attacked her. If a 'man' is what you would call him.

"Danzou sent me in regards to your request. I'm here to offer you my services. I will protect you with my life…" Her voice had somehow finally freed itself, but her words were rudely cut off before she could finish them, his deep, yet emotionless tone loud in the room.

"I didn't request help, especially from the Foundation. You seem to have wasted your time, and nearly your life, by coming here."

Hitori's eyes widened slightly. She absolutely couldn't be sent back to the Leaf. Danzou would regard that as a complete failure. "I have the letter right here."

A soft 'hum' indicated that he was interested in seeing it. She slowly slid it out of her sleeve and handed it to him, their eyes meeting again, before his turned down to the paper. It was from Baki. Gaara could tell the moment his eyes fell upon it. His raised his gaze back to the Anbu again. He didn't have any qualms with the operative being female, but the mask she'd showed up in, that now lay in broken shards on the floor, was another matter. A damned raccoon mask. What was intended by that? He pushed the thought from his mind.

"I suppose I have no choice then, but to welcome you to stay until you are recalled by your commander. There is a sleeping facility on the bottom level. Sunagakure, as any other village, simply enjoys it's hard earned rest. Do not be alarmed by how empty it appears. Appearances are often deceiving." That was all that Gaara felt inclined to offer her, and probably more than she deserved. His eyes shamelessly scrutinized her. The second mask she wore made it hard to get a good look at her, but it was strange how this woman had many attributes common to the people of Suna. He couldn't help but wonder if there was another meaning behind the choice to send her here, out of all of Anbu. He leaned back in his chair, letting the questions tumble through his mind as he watched her.

Hitori let her head fall lower when she realized he wasn't going to say any more. "Thank you, Kazekage sama."

--------

The Anbu captain stood in front of the Hokage's desk in complete silence while she internally struggled with herself. The last time Tsunade had requested Nisei's presence, wasn't one of her fondest memories. That meeting had ended with her current assignment, as teacher to the three students of her team, charged with turning them into ninja fit to become Anbu. In other words, the last time she'd seen Tsunade, the woman had handed her a giant headache and several months of sleepless nights. That much deserved and longed for hot bath remained only a desire in her tired mind, since the very moment she'd stepped inside Konoha, Nisei had been ordered to report directly to the Hokage's office. To make matters even better, when she'd first entered, it appeared the Hokage herself wasn't even there. Could the day get any better?

"Sorry to keep you waiting." Tsunade's soft voice snapped the sarcastic comments right out of Nisei's head as she turned to regard the other woman, shaking her head a little, as if to indicate she hadn't been waiting long.

"Lady Hokage…"

"I heard about the success of your last assignment. Congratulations. And thank you for giving your Village three more well trained defenders." Tsunade looked up at the half-masked Anbu captain and wondered what was going on inside her head. Nisei had changed a lot from the last time she'd been in this office. That's what Tsunade wanted, needed to believe, refusing to even entertain thoughts to the contrary. She continued once the strange blush on Nisei's face finally faded to a light pink. "I've decided to send you to Sunagakure to spy. An Anbu from Root is there, and was sent to stick close to the Kazekage. I want you to watch this operative very carefully, and I want to be made immediately aware of any behavior that seems even slightly suspicious. Everything. You will remain there until I instruct you further."

"Hai, Godaime Hokage…" Nisei bowed respectfully, and straightened to see the letter of approval in her face. Her small fingers took it gently. "I will go straight away."

"Good. You are dismissed-" Tsunade's words were abruptly cut off as the door to her office creaked open.

Shizune poked her head inside, fixing her gaze quickly past Nisei to Tsunade, "Hatake Kakashi has arrived, Lady Hokage."

Nisei immediately replaced her mask carefully over her face and shrugged deeper into her cloak. The last person she wanted to be recognized by was that man. She slipped her hood up, concealing her long black hair as she kept her golden eyes on the ground, walking as quickly from the room as was seemly. His scent was what hit her first. Clean laundry and something else, the natural earthy scent that came from someone who had been tracking around in forest pine. Nisei wanted to laugh at herself for thinking of it that way. She never looked up, sensing his heavy stare on her as she moved fluidly past him. Memories weighed heavily on her mind.

'I'll be your new Anbu captain.' Nisei looked up at the man who was going to be her new sensei. The previous one had died, and apparently they'd chosen to replace him with the famous Copy Ninja. She wondered if she could ever compare to someone who was already so legendary, even with that legend himself for her teacher. Kakashi was slightly older than her, and much more mature, but he still seemed far too young to account for his enormous list of accomplishments. He was very slender and his disheveled white hair was a trait that he had inherited from his father, Konoha's White Fang. A pair of mismatched eyes burned into hers, as Kakashi spoke confidently. 'If you give me the chance. We could end this war, before it begins.'

With a swift shake of her head, Nisei dragged her thoughts back to the present and wondered what in the hell had possessed her to believe Kakashi back then. The slow walk back to her small apartment was refreshing, the slight cool breeze whispering around her comfortably. It was actually very easy to believe in someone like Kakashi, since even before he was an Anbu, there were amazing tales of the infamous 'Sharingan Kakashi'. The harder he pushed the team, the more he drove them, the more keenly Nisei felt his direct attention on her most obvious flaws - her emotions. He patiently taught her how to use that power, how to sync it with her natural chakra and learn to control it, rather than letting it consume her.

_But when the time came to help Kakashi, he…_

Trying hard not to think too much, she wandered through the tiny room she lived in, hunting for and finally finding the new soaps she bought the day before, then gratefully went into the bathroom. She slowly peeled out of her dirty and damaged clothing as the hot water ran into the tub, sweetly scented steam swiftly obscuring the room. Her movements were slow and careful since her entire body already ached and she didn't wish to aggravate it any further. Muscles she didn't even know were aching seemed to gently sigh in relief as she sank into the bath. The heat penetrated thoroughly, and instantly forced the tension to leave her shoulders. With a soft sigh, Nisei let herself sink deeper into the tub, occupying her mind with her new mission. Allowing her thoughts to travel along those paths distracted her exactly as she'd hoped it would. She didn't want her memories to claim her again today.

_I could only run after you, even as you were running straight towards me..._

That's the end of this chapter, the next will be up very shortly.


	4. 対立 Confrontation

Hey guys! It's Amy. Finally, more Kakashi and Gaara in this chapter. The story is moving right along. I hope you don't kill us for the cliffhanger.

**Gaara:** Ne! I do love the part where you make fun of my brother, and his insecurities.

**Authoress Amy:** !! Shhhh~

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Moon's Light, Reality's Dream  
月の光、うつつの夢  
Chapter Four -対立 (_Confrontation_)

あなたを見失う日が来ても  
_ Even if the day comes, where I lose sight of you_  
この目に焼き付いてくれている  
_ Your image will be burned in my eyes.  
_

Nisei's small hands nearly trembled as she slowly lifted her kitsune mask, intending to place it firmly over her face. The quiet appearance of Kakashi at her side nearly made her jump as she guiltily stuck her hands, and mask, quickly behind her back, beaming a small smile up at him and hoping her cheeks weren't flaming. His eyes creased upwards above his mask, and she could tell he was smiling, and probably very much aware of what she'd been up to. "What were you doing, Nisei chan?"

She found herself unable to keep from flushing this time, startled that he was even inquiring. "I want to go on this mission."

Kakashi seemed to stiffen for a moment, his eyes widening just slightly past their usual, lazy half opened gaze, as if questioning the wisdom of her request. He then wanted to shake himself a little. There shouldn't be such a question in his mind, what with hundreds of rogue ninja raiding through the neighboring homes and villages. They needed every shinobi capable of fighting to be out there defending, and Nisei wanted to get caught up at the center of it. Her desire was perfectly normal, natural in the light of what was happening around them. Why was it so hard to allow it? With a sigh he carefully hid from her eyes, he wondered idly if it was just because she was his student, and he couldn't help but see her as 'not ready yet' though she undoubtedly was. He admired her bravery, sensitivity, and unique, keen fascination with chakra. She could be useful in this battle, but Kakashi still found himself stubbornly wanting to refuse to allow it. He logically knew he should not only allow her, but encourage her. The sudden tension that nearly overwhelmed him at the thought wasn't going to enable him to approve of it, though he originally would have. Anyone but Nisei would have gotten an immediately positive response from him.

"Nisei." He spoke softly to her, watching her golden eyes fall to stare at the floor, disappointment already radiating from her small form. She must've known that he wasn't going to let her go. The rest of his words practically sighed out of him, carrying the tiniest pang of regret at his refusal. "I can't let you."

"Stop picking on the girl already!" The sudden voice broke the tension and silence of the room like a rock flying through a window, leaving Kakashi's thoughts momentarily scattered on the floor like so many shards of glass.

He slowly turned to look at his former team mate, the same girl that he promised Obito he would always protect. Usually, he was relieved that the raven-haired Rin was around to bust his chops, and lessen his authority in front of one of his students, but now wasn't one of those times. "Rin, stay out of this..." His tone was as soft and laconic as usual, but the slightly harder look in his eyes left no doubt that he was entirely serious.

"I really don't want to." Rin's words carried more than a hint of amusement as she pointed a finger at him, aiming to poke him gently in the cheek. Her pale gray eyes nearly creased shut as she beamed a huge grin at Nisei, leaving the young Anbu feeling incredibly out of place and shifting uncomfortably. Kakashi avoided the jabbing finger with the ease, shooting another nearly dangerous looking glare at Rin as she continued. "Kakashi must be concerned about you. Don't take it personally."

Kakashi thought hard and fast in the tense silence that then fell over the room. He knew all too well that Rin would harass him until he gave in, and there was only one way to avoid that unpleasantness. With another heavy sigh, he turned slightly towards Nisei, leaning in a little and ignoring Rin entirely. It almost rankled to give her the satisfaction of a win. Even though everything in him practically cringed at the idea, he found himself bending. "Okay, Nisei." The young ninja stiffened at her name, her gaze raising slowly to meet his again. His mismatched eyes seemed less than amused, and she could tell he felt forced into giving her this opportunity. "I'll let you come with us. The first time you get in the way-"

The girl quickly agreed, nodding almost frantically in her desire to cut him off. "I'll go back."

Rin winked mischievously at her from behind Kakashi before she turned away, walking casually over to the nearby Anbu with an odd lion mask. "Yamato-kun, I want you to meet Nisei. She'll be coming on the mission with us."

"Nisei chan." He bowed as he laughed, a soft, short sound resembling a bark. "Hopefully you will have fun out on your first assignment. Kakashi senpai is surely an honorable Anbu, and a brilliant strategist." Nisei's head turned back to her teacher at Yamoto's words, almost as if it was forced, and her gaze traveled slowly over Kakashi who now leaned with seeming nonchalance against the wall. Then her eyes met his and she felt as if she'd been hit by that stern, measuring gaze.

Kakashi slowly crossed his arms over his chest when Nisei's eyes fled from his, letting his head fall slightly to the left as he rested his right foot against the wall he was leaning on. His silence seemed to suit the thoughts running through his mind. Already he was feeling uneasy about giving in so quickly to his student's request. Rin's irritating tendency to push would have likely driven him to this decision sooner or later, but that didn't make him dislike it any less. It was now just one more thing for him to worry about, one more thing that might leave him with yet another bitter feeling of regret. Kakashi already had enough worries on his mind. No one seemed to understand that he really didn't need or want any more.

_'I knew better than to let you come in the first place...'_

Nisei blinked suddenly in the harsh sunlight, feeling an odd surreal sensation as she realized the faint blur on the horizon was the village of Suna. A swift mental slap seemed the only appropriate response to discovering that she'd been practically daydreaming for almost the entire run through the sand. Thinking that she'd been lucky as hell not to be caught unawares in a sandstorm, she slowly continued approaching the busy desert city, trying unsuccessfully to erase the memory of the look in Kakashi's eyes that day, and the echo of his furious words from not long after.

---------

Hitori woke up slowly, stretching and yawning as she glanced around, feeling more rested than she had in a long time. Her body only allowed her to sleep for about four hours at a time, though at the moment, she felt as if she'd gotten twice that. It made her wonder for a moment if she'd somehow overdone it. Shaking her head slowly to rid her thoughts of the cobwebs that seemed to come from sleep, she gathered some clean clothes and walked slowly into the room adjoining hers. With something like a sigh, she removed the fabric mask she always wore. The water hissed softly as she ran her hands under head of the shower and washed her face before slowly shedding her clothes and stepping under the cool water. She felt mild astonishment that the blazing heat from outside could be felt through the walls of the building already. As she reached down and slid her hand along the back of her right calf, brushing away the golden grains that stubbornly clung there, her mind lazily wondered if it was Gaara's sand, or sand she picked up while running through the village. She let her hair fall forward, as she moved directly under the spray of water, her hand twisting the knob to the coldest setting. In her mind she could see Gaara's eyes, that intense gaze radiating dislike or perhaps merely just blatant dismissal of her entirely.

Hitori didn't like to have emotions invoked within her. Feeling anything was a foreign, unwanted sensation. As much as she didn't want it there, his dark voice was still in her head and when combined with that look on his face, it raised an uneasy, questionable feeling within her. Yomi's words came back to her then, like a lightning bolt striking the center of her mind, forcing her to straighten up in surprise. This was what intimidation felt like? She stared hard at the wall through the clear drops of water, allowing the spray to blur her vision until her eyes finally closed. Leaning back against the cold tiles, she pressed to fingers to the cut on the side of her neck, feeling the slow, steady pulse beneath it. That could have all too easily been fatal, had he chosen to cut just a little deeper.

She turned off the water as she stepped out, using a thick, soft towel to dry herself quickly before slipping into her clean black uniform. The fabric mask was quickly replaced, followed by her inu mask, concealing her face completely. She deftly fitted her Anbu armor to her body, closing the straps around her thin, delicately toned arms as she turned to leave. Gaara had been right she realized, as she stepped out into the crowded hallway. The Kazekage building was busy during the day. She received very few glances, which she supposed she should be grateful for, since no one acted suspicious of her presence. Each person seemed to have their own destination, and they efficiently avoided bumping into the Anbu as they rushed about completing their varied daily business. It took a lot of work to run an entire village.

Hitori made her way up the stairs to the Kazekage's main office, where he would no doubt spend most of his time during the day. She knocked lightly before entering the room, her eyes narrowing a little when she realized it was empty. The surprise attack from the night before quickly flashed through her mind, and she was halfway into a defensive stance before she realized just how ridiculous that idea was. As she moved further into the room, her eyes continued to dart everywhere, taking in every tiny detail. The furnishings were simple and impersonal, just a long desk, Gaara's seat, and several other chairs scattered almost haphazardly about. Light seemed to leak in at the back of the room, and she wasn't too surprised to find another door there. As her hand slowly pushed it open, she wondered where it would lead her.

Her curiosity was only piqued by the narrow, twisting walkway before her that seemed to lead to the roof of the Kazekage building. When she was nearly to the top she paused, seeing the slim outline of a figure clad in burgundy fabric, that unmistakable red hair blazing under the harsh sunlight. Gaara was standing there? She stopped herself from going any further, and had taken a step backwards, intending to leave, when another figure walked up behind him. This new person was taller than the Kazekage, and dressed in all black. In spite of feeling like she was eavesdropping, she lingered for a moment, wanting to make sure the encounter was as friendly as it appeared to be.

The one in black spoke first. "I don't like saying this, but the people still only think of you as a 'frightening weapon'."

Those soft words brought back more of what Yomi had read to her the night she was given this mission. Gaara had siblings. The older brother was Kankurou, known for his puppet style jutsu, and the signature paint he wore on his face. That makeup stood for something, but the file hadn't elaborated on that part. This black clad figure was certainly him. Hitori's hand moved away from the tanto sheathed on her back as she relaxed her stiff posture. Gaara had so far barely acknowledged the other's presence, though Kankurou continued to speak lowly, as if attempting make sense of his younger brother's decision.

"I wonder if you understand just how hard all of this is going to be." Kankurou spread his arms wide, aggravation nearly dripping off of each word as he stepped closer to his brother. "The superiors don't think very much of you, either. When it comes to you, the vast majority of the village still trembles with fear."

"I know." Gaara's deep voice resonated within her, summoning up a feeling she couldn't seem to place, since it was entirely too complicated to understand at the moment. She pressed her hand against the rocky wall and continued to listen, as if she were standing right next to them. "All one can do is create his own path in this world, without being a loner and taking the easy route. Maybe someday, I'll be able to be more like…"

Gaara stopped himself from saying Naruto's name just then, knowing that his brother wouldn't fully understand. No one else could ever understand the moment that seemed to change everything for him. He continued on with what he was trying to express, encouraged by Kankurou's concern. "That's why I wanted to be Kazekage. To live for, and bond with, the people of this village. I want to earn the respect of everyone through my own hard work. I understood that after seeing Uzumaki Naruto."

Hitori's eyes moved to look at Kankurou, watching as he slowly turned his face to look at his brother, his eyes widening in a look of mixed awe and surprise. Gaara shifted a little, his eyes still moving over the village below him as he continued on softly. "Up until now, my bonds with others have only been ones of hatred and murder. But, seeing him fight so hard made me wonder what a bond really is. I think I understand a little now. Suffering, sadness ... and joy. To be able to share it with another person. Uzumaki Naruto ... when I fought him, I feel that is what he taught me. He knew the same pain I did, and then he taught me that you can change that path."

The sun's rays shone down brilliantly again as the clouds moved from it's path, and the nearly blinding golden light seemed completely different than it had before, when she first stepped outside. That strange, heavy sensation in her chest had become bothersome as she continued watching, helpless before, and unable to conquer, whatever it was she was feeling. She pushed herself away from the wall and rested a hand lightly over her heart, willing it to stop pounding so fiercely. Why was she feeling so overwhelmed? A slight movement snapped her back to attention and she watched Gaara turn his head to look back over his shoulder at his brother as he spoke again.

"I wish to one day be needed by someone. Not as a frightening weapon, but as the Sand's Kazekage."

Hitori wasn't entirely sure if her eyes were playing tricks on her or not, but it looked like there was a small smile on his face when he stopped speaking. Without waiting a moment longer, she turned and made her way back into the Kazekage's office. She kept walking until she reached the door. Being here didn't feel right anymore, and she suddenly thought of herself as unfit for this mission. She shook her head, wondering if she had just honestly doubted her abilities. Danzou and Yomi had both told her repeatedly that she was Anbu's best, but somehow she was no longer able to claim that distinction as her own. Gaara's story had been rewritten in a completely different light for her. This man had been a cold blooded murderer, more of a machine than a human being, and she couldn't help but recognize that same _emotionless_ quality in herself now. Perhaps he was ill-fated, but he no longer even slightly resembled the monstrous killer he'd once been. The cut along her neck was the result of the careful caution maintained by a man who lived with the constant threat of assassination.

Now she was certain she'd never let anyone harm Gaara in any way. She felt anger rise within her from just thinking about it. What the hell was that? Why was she suddenly feeling these emotional reactions that had never plagued her before? Hitori sighed at herself and stood there indecisively. She knew she shouldn't leave the room, so she stood quietly next to the door and waited. The light scrape of approaching footsteps made her head snap up, and then she was looking into quite possibly the most confident pair of midnight eyes she'd ever seen. This blonde haired girl looked aggressive, ready to kill at any moment. Hitori found herself approving of the other's presence.

"You must be the new Anbu operative." Her tone was laced with disdain and something that hinted at a cleverness that reminded Hitori of the Hokage. Temari had been listed as the name of Gaara's older sister, and regrettably few characteristics were written down about her. The woman had an overly large fan strapped to her back, and that was enough information for Hitori to be certain that's who she was now dealing with. Perhaps it was time to test Yomi's lesson on 'the art of conversation.'

Instead of the short nod she would normally reply with, Hitori decided to try speaking. Her voice came out quiet and low, but steady as she met the other woman's eyes again. "I am." It wasn't much, but she supposed it was a start. She could mentally hear Yomi's words of praise, along with some rather colorful comments about Temari's clothes. Surprised, she blocked those out in a rush, pushing aside Yomi's voice for now. Temari maintained a serious demeanor and the look on her face never changed. Hitori glanced away awkwardly as she decided to add more, "It is my pleasure to aid Sunagakure's Kazekage in any way I can."

"Gaara doesn't need you here. We are more than capable of protecting him ourselves." Kankurou's voice cut rudely through the stillness of the room as he walked back in, with Gaara following slowly behind him. His eyes seemed to hold a challenge, as he stared hard at the Anbu, then smirked before continuing on. "I think Baki made a big mistake. You should be able to return immediately, right?"

"Wrong," Gaara said, his pale aqua eyes hardening just a little as he directed his gaze at his brother. Before continuing he eased into the seat behind his desk and steepled his fingers in front of his face, resting his elbows lightly on the stone surface before him. "If she went back to Konoha now, it would be seen as a grave insult to the Leaf village. And, I don't want to even think of how Baki would feel if we denied the help that he went out of his way to request. He meant well, I'm certain."

"You used to be so good at being insensitive." Temari smiled brightly at him as she crossed the room. It seemed she enjoyed watching Kankurou being put in his place. "You've learned compassion, Gaara. It looks good on you."

Gaara's gaze stayed glued on Hitori's profile while she slowly turned to look at him as if he had compelled her to do so. She had a different mask on now, and he was glad to see that it didn't even resemble the raccoon mask she'd worn previously. A smile tried to form on his face, but it disappeared before it was more than a thought, his eyes turning back to Kankurou, "You should give the Anbu a tour of the building. I'm sure our ways of doing things are much different than they are in Konoha, and it must be a little confusing."

Abandoning even a pretense at maturity, Temari stuck her tongue out watching, and nearly laughing, as Kankurou reluctantly made his way over towards Hitori.

"Do you have a name, Anbu?" The question took her almost entirely by surprise before she realized that she never had given them her name. Deciding to attempt politeness, she bowed shortly.

"My name is Hitori." After hearing everyone else speak, the volume of her voice struck her as unusually low. Maybe disuse could cause such a thing to happen, but she wasn't sure. It really didn't seem important, anyway. Kankurou replied with something that sounded like a grunt as he stepped out of the room, keeping a fair distance between them as he went over the various rooms and their purposes. She didn't find any of the rooms to hold particular importance to Gaara, or protecting him as most of them were simply store rooms or offices. The last door opened into a room with mirrors for walls, and she felt curiosity spring up within her again. What could be the reason for making something like this? Hitori followed Kankurou, feeling more than a little uneasy as dozens of copies of her reflection stared back at her, no matter where she looked. At least what she saw was her Anbu mask, so she was spared the odd discomfort that came from seeing her own face.

"This room is where Gaara comes to think." Kankurou held Hitori's questioning eyes for a long moment, "I don't know why. It's something about dealing with his demon. Being the host for Shukaku means Gaara doesn't sleep. That lack of sleep is part of what causes those dark rings around his eyes. If he did sleep..." He broke off there with a shudder, obviously not wanting to contemplate what that would mean.

Hitori found herself again in a position to speak. "Well-"

"I'm going to say this again, because I think it bears repeating." He seemed to enjoy cutting her off. "Gaara doesn't need your protection." Kankurou stared dispassionately at the Anbu, whom he saw as nothing more than some unwanted stranger from Konoha. Never would he consider her actual protection. He made sure that the insult was just an undertone, as he wondered if the whispered tales of the Anbu Root were at all true.

She bit at her tongue, having no idea what to say, and not even sure what a natural human reaction to that statement would be. That odd wave of anger ran through her again, a feeling she was quickly becoming used to, and she took a single, even step towards Kankurou. His dark heavy stare didn't intimidate her in the slightest. He wasn't anything like Gaara. At this point, she wasn't sure exactly what that meant, but she didn't feel in any way scared of this man's presence, or his chakra which was flaring tensely now. If he were to make a move, she could easily snatch his wrist and break it before he had any chance of reaching the scrolls on his back. Users of the puppet jutsu were notoriously weak in hand to hand combat, and she felt with absolute certainty that she could beat him. Maybe her presence here wasn't a welcome one to him, but that wasn't going to deter her from fulfilling her mission. The hints of disrespect were starting to become annoying. She didn't understand it even a little but, then again, Hitori couldn't comprehend living at all without being controlled. It was all she'd ever known.

"You stay out of my way, and I'll stay out of yours," Kankurou said in a low voice that was intended to be menacing - his words a blatant dismissal as he pushed his way past her, and went to close the door behind him.

Just as it started to close, she found herself murmuring, "I'll see you later, kabuki boy." The words stunned her slightly, until she heard Yomi's distinctive giggle in her mind. Apparently, the Yomi that seemed to have taken up residence in her head had decided to give Kankurou a nickname.

Kankurou's eyes widened slightly before narrowing dangerously at her. The door practically slammed and the image of her expressionless face, which didn't in any way match her words, refused to leave his thoughts. There was no way in hell Kankurou would tolerate a nickname like that, especially coming from her. Obviously she intended to make this forced time together even more difficult. He knew that he, personally, was all the protection Gaara needed. Somehow, he'd force that infuriating woman to see things his way. Either that, or he'd kill her. One way or another, he'd make sure she wouldn't be sticking around long.

He stalked down the hallway to Gaara's room like an angry cat, and glared at him, as if his brother was the cause of his anger. Turquoise met onyx curiously. "I don't like the Anbu dog. Do you know what she just called me? Kabuki boy. Do I look like a fucking kabuki performer to you?"

Gaara refused to answer this, having had the same thought at one point or another when studying his brother's odd rituals with paints. Kankurou sighed, annoyed by the silence, as he turned to see Temari there. "Oh, of course you're standing behind me. Do you think I look like one of the kabuki performers?" The blond-haired kunoichi only covered her mouth in response, fearing death should her laughter manage to escape. Kankurou glared around the room, falling silent and crossing his arms over his chest.

Hitori walked back down the hallway, feeling yet another odd sensation within her from the knowledge that she'd unnerved Kankurou, and made her way outside. The least she could do was patrol, and make sure that no outsiders tried to get into the building. Being used to the Konoha villagers made all of the cloaked Suna residents seem suspicious in some way, though. Scanning around, she quickly found four logical places to conceal herself, all of which over looked the village. After making sure that no one had taken notice of her, she jumped up and perched on top of the tall building, waiting. And the waiting never got old, as her eyes skimmed every bit of the wind torn living community of Sunagakure.

-------

Tsunade couldn't remember the last time she'd been this angry with Naruto. His childish outbursts were definitely dancing all over her last nerve. He should honestly be happy he was being sent out on any mission at all. She couldn't completely hide a smirk, noticing that Sakura had the blonde ninja in a headlock and was glaring at him while trying to maintain a smile on her face. Her student had not only grown stronger, but she'd matured tremendously in the short time they'd been working together. Those topaz eyes then glanced towards Kakashi, who looked like he wished he could sink into the floor. It wasn't easy keeping Naruto in check, and Tsunade didn't envy him that task at all. Sure, the boy had enormous potential, but getting him to understand things was sometimes an uphill battle. It took more patience than she possessed right now to tolerate this all too characteristic behavior from him. Just as she was about to speak again, the door was thrust open and one of the decoders hastened into the room.

"Lady Hokage! We've received an emergency message from the Sand Village." Her words came out in a rush as she bowed before the desk, and had the effect of silencing everyone in the room.

"The Sand Village!" Tsunade couldn't hide the surprise in her voice, mentally wondering if Nisei could have had enough time to report in already. There seemed to be a lot going on in Sunagakure at the moment. It was too odd to be mere coincidence.

"I have the report right here." Barely checking a sigh, and feeling a strange sense of uneasiness growing within her, Tsunade reached her hand out to take the paper. The odd tension in the air made her certain it wasn't good news. Every face in the room was turned towards her, and she could feel the weight of their gazes as if they were pressing upon her shoulders as she glanced down at the report.

Nisei charged down the hallway unable to remember the last time she'd kept up this speed for this long. Her body definitely wasn't going to let her off easy this time. Everything blurred slightly in front of her as sweat poured ran down her face in rivulets, stinging and burning when it managed to drip into her eyes. Time and distance no longer seemed to hold real meaning for her. Getting to Tsunade was her only goal, and she focused on it with an intensity that was nearly frightening. She ignored everyone and everything in her way, her eyes locked on the door at the end of the hallway that was slowly swinging closed. At this point, that simple wooden object had become a beacon shining brightly in an empty black space. It hadn't quite latched when she hit it with both hands, reaching the desk in her haste before the door slammed into the wall with a thud as loud as the one she made nearly collapsing onto the hard surface. "Suna is under attack!" She wasn't sure where she found the breath to shout so loudly before her legs gave out beneath her. With a soft groan, she sank slowly to her knees, ripping her mask off in an attempt to draw in more air.

Tsunade's surprised shout of "Nisei!" was nearly drowned by the Anbu's own cry, and a stunned silence fell over the room. She stared at Nisei almost in shock, amazed at how hard she must've pushed herself to get back to Konoha so fast, and gave her a moment to collect herself. By the time the Anbu finally regained her feet, the other woman had finished reading the report given to her by the decoder. "The Kazekage has been kidnapped by the Akatsuki." Her voice remained even as she let the paper fall heedlessly to the table. "They've asked for our help."

Shizune's hands balled into fists, her brown eyes narrowing as she turned towards her master. "Don't tell me you're planning to send Team Kakashi!"

Without skipping a beat, Tsunade cut her off before she could get started. "This is an emergency! We don't have time to be picky, and Kakashi has fought the Akatsuki before." The tone in her voice almost dared Shizune to disagree with her decision. She already knew all the arguments the other woman would use anyway. It was no secret that the Akatsuki wanted Naruto, and Shizune would see this move as practically handing the boy to them on a silver platter. But the Sannin knew that this time, sending him into danger couldn't be helped.

The Copy Ninja inclined his head forward slightly at Tsunade's words, sparing a glance at Nisei who was still obviously trying to catch her breath. Despite how much she'd changed since he'd last seen her, he wasn't surprised that she'd made it back from Suna so fast. She'd probably pushed herself beyond her limits, like she always did. Emotions had a way of ruling Nisei and that didn't seem like something she'd ever be able to change. At times like these, though, her ability to use those intense emotions to strengthen herself was a definite advantage. Not even many other Anbu operatives could have completed that four day round trip in less than three, with no time to rest. It was more than just a little impressive.

Nisei felt Kakashi's eyes on her, but didn't turn to meet his gaze. Her mind was still spinning from what Tsunade had said, and from what she'd seen in the sky over Suna before turning back for Konoha. That giant wall of sand rising into the air made her shiver just thinking about it. Such an extraordinary amount of power; it was overwhelming. She shook her head a little, forcing away fatigue and focusing her attention back on the Hokage.

"You will head to Suna immediately, assess the situation, and send a report back to me. Then, you are to assist them. Follow their orders and help them in any way you can. Is that understood?" Her eyes seemed to narrow on Naruto, specifically, and she nodded at the affirmative answers she received from all three. Without even pausing for breath, she then turned to regard the Anbu operative. "Nisei, since you already have a mission in the Sand village, you will accompany Team Kakashi, and also make yourself available to assist. Go, all of you. With as much haste as you can manage. The gravity of this situation isn't going to lessen with time." She spared one last glance around the room, inclining her head towards Iruka with a look that spoke volumes. He nodded back, still looking a little shell shocked.

Naruto seemed much too excited by this new mission and Sakura practically dragged him out of the room as Kakashi moved a little closer to Nisei and gazed lazily down at her. "Are you sure you're fit to travel that distance again as quickly as necessary? You look beyond exhausted to me." He couldn't help but be concerned about her, even though he knew it would only annoy her. The way she stiffened at his words made him sigh softly, the sound inaudible to all but his own ears. One of these days, his former student was going to push herself to death.

The tone of his voice seemed to jar every nerve within her, and Nisei gritted her teeth, keeping her golden gaze on the floor while she replied. "As the Hokage said, I already have a mission in Suna. Besides," she raised her head, her eyes meeting his almost defiantly. "I've never turned away from my responsibilities. Take your team and head out, Kakashi senpai. I'll be right behind you - every step of the way." She almost cringed at the coldness in her own voice, but it couldn't be helped. Not in the state she was in at the moment. He would just have to deal with it.

Kakashi ignored the ice in her words, his eyes narrowing as he stared at her angry face. There, under her eye, was that a scar? It was hard to tell between the soft light the windows let in and the natural shadows along that side of her face. He leaned in a little, trying to be nonchalant about it, but her hands replaced her mask before he could get a closer look. Those eyes lingered on him a moment longer from behind the painted kitsune face before she brushed past him, taking even, steady strides towards the door.

Nisei's heart was pounding hard in her chest as she reached for the door, wondering if he'd seen the scar before she had a chance to cover it. She never wanted him to see that badge of her shame. Memories of that horrible day already tormented her enough. For him to see that mark, to know...It would be too much to bear. Ironically, it was the techniques he'd taught her years ago that enabled her to regain her composure as quickly as she did. "I'll meet you at the doors in twenty minutes," she called back over her shoulder, not waiting for an answer. Her steps carried her away from him as fast as they could without being too obvious about it. How in the hell was she going to deal with this new mission if she couldn't control her emotions during such a short encounter? She didn't know. She really didn't want to think about it, but obviously she'd have to figure it out quickly. There was no other option at this point. Until this mission was over, she was stuck with him.

One word flitted through her mind as she prepared to leave yet again, and that one word troubled her in more ways than she could count.

Dangerous.

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Thanks for stopping by and reading! How's it going so far? *sweatdrop*


	5. チェイス Chase Part I

Hey guys, Amy I have decided to post this next chapter in a different, smaller format. We don't want to kill your eyes! Thank you for the many hits. We're complimented!

**Yomi**: Wanna go to the bathhouse?

**  
Ibuki**: ^__^ Sure!

**  
Yomi:** Score.

**  
Ibuki**: I know a good one.

**  
Yomi:** Lots of cute girls?

**  
Ibuki:** Tons *winks*

**  
Yomi:** YATTA!

Moon's Light, Reality's Dream  
月の光、うつつの夢  
Chapter Five - チェイス (_Chase_)  
Part I

足跡を なぞる日は足跡を  
_I followed your footprints, that day I could hear your footprints_  
はじめから理解ってた　だから悲しくはない  
_ From the beginning, I understood, so it's not sad._

Hitori found herself feeling a strange sense of being lost without any real commands to follow, other than those originally given to her by Danzou. Her life, to this point, had been a series of actions carrying out orders issued to her from someone or another. It wasn't something she'd ever consciously known, but she was feeling that loss keenly now. She glanced around the strange mirrored room one last time as her hand closed over the doorknob.

No matter how hard she tried, she could never figure out why this room drew her the way it did. Being in here actually made her very uncomfortable, and seeking out such a feeling made no logical sense to her at all. The sounds of hurried footsteps above her head snapped her out of the momentary reverie she'd been lost in. This tendency her mind had to wander lately was more irritating than even the odd flashes of anger she'd started experiencing.

She moved quickly down the hallway, nearly tearing the door off it's hinges in her haste to find out what was happening. It had only been three days since she arrived, and she reluctantly cast her eyes around for Kankurou, knowing Temari had already left for Konoha. Kabuki boy could tell her what was going on. An unfamiliar sense of unease started to fill her as the panicked sounds of many different voices shouting at once became clearer.

There were too many people packed into this small area - too many armed people. Shouted orders and the general sounds of the chaos of an army preparing for battle filled the air. A sudden explosion drew her eyes towards the starless night sky. Far above her, floating on a platform of sand, was Gaara.

Another figure was perched upon an odd looking bird that darted through the sky, never really coming too close to where Gaara stood impassively while his sand chased the intruder. Hitori studied the other man and quickly realized by his clothes that he was a member of the Akatsuki. That dangerous organization was not to be underestimated. Danzou sent her specifically for that reason.

She found herself annoyed at the strange feeling growing within her and threatening to choke her at any moment. All these damned emotional responses were pissing her off now. Gaara's faintly angry face never changed expression as his arms slowly rose. As they came up, an enormous wall of sand rose behind him. She watched in awe, amazed by the sheer amount of power he possessed. Danzou thought this man required her protection?

Explosions rocked the sky and sand darted everywhere. Hitori found herself unable to move, unable to tear her eyes from the battle going on above Suna. Every tense moment took on a surreal quality, a feeling that time had both sped up and slowed down all at once Her eyes jumped from Gaara to his adversary whenever the other man was close enough for her to study him. That blonde ponytail, the weapons he used... everything about him was trying to tell Hitori who he was.

The Akatsuki file was woefully thin, and most of the information in it, aside from that on Uchiha Itachi, came from a source who's reliability was questionable at best. But going by that information, she was able to put a tentative name to the face grinning at Gaara through the smoke overhead. Deidara.

Hitori heard Kankurou before he appeared beside her. "It's just as I thought."

Baki was already shouting orders to the shinobi around them. "Hurry, prepare for battle! We're going to assist the Kazekage! Medical team, set up a barrier, and guide the civilians in there! Kankurou…"

"What is it?" The snapped reply caused Baki raise a brow at him. He softened a little, understanding what Kankurou must be feeling with his brother under attack, and tried again. "What if he loses control and Shukaku appears again? Are you really willing to..."

Kankurou ground his teeth, letting a short laugh escape. "That won't happen. Gaara won't harm the people of this village."

The Anbu thought back to three days ago, when she had been on that narrow walkway overhearing the conversation between Kankurou and Gaara. If Gaara was truly the person he seemed to be on that day, then he certainly wouldn't risk harming anyone in the village. No, he would do everything in his power to protect them.

The strange tugging in her chest didn't allow her to think rationally. Hell, she didn't want to! These people who had never believed in Gaara were standing here with their arms raised, cheering for the most feared man in their village.

"Do your best, Kazekage-sama!" The shouted words of encouragement came from all around her. She idly wondered if he could hear them, all the way up where he was. That thought drew her full attention back to the sky, to see a giant ball of sand floating there. Gaara's ultimate defense. She could just barely see the crack in that defense where he was standing, like a seeing a shadow on the moon. Could Deidara see Gaara's piercing gaze through the all encompassing darkness around them?

They seemed to have come to a stand-off, but that feeling only lasted for a moment before Hitori saw the small bird-like object in Deidara's hand. Her eyes widened when he tossed it out in front of him and it grew to an enormous size as wings spread on either side of it. Even though her mind stubbornly insisted that it vaguely resembled some sort of angel, she knew an explosive that size could flatten the entire village, killing everyone within in a matter of seconds.

Baki's hurried voice was small as he panicked, penetrating slowly into her hazy mind. "This is bad! Spread out!"

The Anbu stood in stunned silence as the giant bomb began to fall, her eyes unable to leave the vision of death that only came closer with each passing second. Her hard meeting with the ground, and the sudden pressure over her just seconds later therefore came as a complete surprise. Hitori struggled unsuccessfully to free herself from the protective shield Kankurou had made of his body over her. Realizing it was futile she relaxed with a sigh, feeling the sharp stab of failure as she waited for was would certainly be the end.

Idle thoughts of what death would feel like were shattered by the violent shaking of the ground she was laying upon and a sudden light that blinded her through the lids of her closed eyes. In spite of the muttering around her moments later, she was certain that they were dead, until she opened her eyes. Kankurou looked over his shoulder in shock, and she was then able to see above them again. A massive shield of sand hung suspended above the entire village. Gaara had saved them all.

Kankurou stood slowly and Hitori eased herself up off of the ground as well. The nearly anguished sound of his voice whispering Gaara's name, snapped the Anbu's attention to him immediately. If anyone knew Gaara's limit, it was his brother. She opened her mouth to speak when another small explosion from overhead killed whatever thought had been forming. The defensive sand around Gaara appeared fully closed when the smoke cleared. How in the world was he still hanging on? A long, tense moment of silence passed as she glanced to Deidara who appeared calm, his bird hovering as if waiting. Waiting for what?

The answer came quickly in the form of another explosion. This one originated from within the defensive ball. Sand rained down upon them, sliding away as Gaara's form slowly emerged, his head hanging down. Above them the shield that had saved their lives began slowly moving away. Her eyes met Kankurou's slowly, both of them knowing exactly what that meant. As the sand fell harmlessly to the ground away from the village, her head lowered, her gaze focusing on her feet. Gaara had made his choice. He'd saved Suna instead of himself.

A choked sound of rage came from Kankurou even as Baki began shouting orders to the men around him. Giant arrows shot into the sky and Deidara's bird weaved between them, heading inexorably for the sinking figure of the Sand's Kazekage. Hitori knew she should move, should do something but her feet didn't seem to want to obey her until Gaara's form crashed onto the tail of the Akatsuki's bird. A shout seemed to tear itself from her throat as she darted forward, only to be yanked back by Kankurou.

"You can't fly, Anbu." He released her arm as he glared at her. The overwhelming emotion that flashed across his face caused the Anbu to feel an odd sense of grief. "I'll take care of this."

"You can't go alone." She narrowed her jade eyes at him, anger ringing in her voice. "I'm going with you."

"Part of your mission?" Kankurou remarked sarcastically, as he turned away from her. "I'm doing it because he's my brother."

"It is part of my mission, but he's…" Her eyes darkened, as she stepped closer to him. "He's the Kazekage. We need to bring him back." His head turned slowly towards her and they stared coldly at each other for a long moment.

"Keep up," he finally said, his voice hoarse as he turned away and started running, not waiting to see if she followed. Hitori took off after him immediately, Danzou's words echoing ominously in her mind.

_'You are to sacrifice your life to save Gaara's.'_

--------

Nisei purposefully stayed behind Team Kakashi as they moved towards Suna, keeping their figures in sight, but barely more than human shaped blurs on the horizon. The scar on her face almost felt as if it was burning, and she caught herself trying to touch it, in spite of the mask over her face. Memories pushed hard at her consciousness, trying desperately to force their way in, making her wonder if somewhere deep inside she enjoyed tormenting herself by reliving that nightmare.

That horrible day... the smoke filling the air, the distant sounds of the few remaining battles echoing under a gray sky, everything appearing monochromatic, every moment filled with tension. It was the worst day of her life.

Sweat and smoke combined to sting her eyes as Nisei leaned against the tree catching her breath. She carefully wiped her face and then replaced her kitsune mask before glancing over at Kakashi. He was staring almost blankly out over the barren, war torn landscape before them, his hands clenched into fists at his sides. Ever since they'd found Rin's body, Nisei had gotten nothing from him but silence. Failure weighed heavily on him.

Her sensei wouldn't even meet her eyes as they made their way back to the village, his trudging steps carrying an ominous tone. Exhaustion and a few minor wounds kept her from doing much more than just keeping up. When he stopped where they were now standing, she was just thankful for the chance to rest her aching body.

"I'm leaving Anbu." His abrupt words cut through the tired fog in her mind, his tone snapping her head up before she even registered the meaning of his words.

"But, Kakashi senpai...."

"It's not your decision to make, Nisei. There's no point in arguing." His voice was soft, sounding almost defeated, as if something had finally beaten him down to the point where he could no longer go on. He finally turned to look at her, his eyes holding a flinty resolve, his jaw clenched almost as tightly as his fists."You aren't even supposed to be here. I regret allowing you to come along."

Surprise met with hurt and anger inside her. "This is about Rin's death, isn't it? There's nothing you could have done! She was gone long before..." Her eyes didn't have time to register anything. The next few seconds were nothing more than a blur and then pain as she felt her back slamming into the tree she'd been leaning on moments before, his hands pinning her shoulders there forcefully as he leaned in close.

"You shouldn't speak of things you don't understand." His face was barely inches from hers as she struggled to free herself. Every deep, scared breath she drew caused her chest to brush against his as it heaved. "What are you, Nisei, but a little girl, unfit to be Anbu. You try so hard to fit into this world that you can never understand. You're too naive, too childish..."

"Stop it! You're hurting me!" Her words didn't even seem to register to him as she struggled harder. He held her there easily, his breathing not even slightly quickened by effort. She could feel his fingers digging into the flesh of her arms around the armor she wore.

"You don't even know what you're fighting for!"

She tried to push down the hurt his words roused in her. "I fight for the safety of the Leaf Village! And.. also... " The words choked up in her chest. Nisei was unable to face the anger in his voice. How could she ever say that to him when he was looking at her with such contempt in his eyes? The hands on her shoulders only pushed her harder against the trunk of the tree, the bark scraping painfully against her spine as his eyes narrowed a little. Fear spiked within her again, stronger than before. Maybe she really didn't know this man at all.

"Do you know what happens to the women who love me, Nisei?" He paused a moment, his eyes almost searching hers as his grip tightened yet again. "They die."

Tears threatened to fall as she blinked slowly, trying to force herself to calm down. "What happened to Rin wasn't your fault." Her voice nearly broke by the time she finished, her golden eyes lowering as if she couldn't bear to see what he was feeling any longer. Releasing her left shoulder, he used that hand to turn her face back up to his again, anger simmering in his mismatched gaze.

"I made a promise, and I broke it. I failed in the worst way." His tone was as dark, as bitter as the words he spoke. Something shattered inside of her. She needed to show him he was wrong, to convince him to change his mind. Finally, she let go of her anger, allowing it to build inside of her until she could no longer hold it back.

"I won't let you leave." This time her gaze narrowed. Kakashi froze for a long moment before both of his hands released her and he stepped back, a short, sarcastic laugh coming from him. It sounded chilling as it seemed to echo around her.

"You don't know when enough is enough, do you?" That laugh came again, hitting her like thousands of tiny, poisoned needles, driving the hurt deeper within her at every impact. "You can't stop me."

"You're only a man!" She stepped towards him, eyes blazing as her anger only grew with his insults. "What gives you the right to act like some sort of god? People die! We can't..." She never had a chance to finish her words. His hand crashed into the side of her face, and her world narrowed to the sound of the porcelain shattering and a swift stab of pain. Her hands met the ground as her knees did, the shattered mask laying around her on the earth as blood oozed from the gash just beneath her eye. He hit her?

The dazed condition of her mind made it almost impossible for her to register what had just happened. "Kakashi senpai... onegai..." Her words were soft, barely louder than a whisper strangled by her overwhelming sadness. Silence surrounded her for so long, she was almost certain he wasn't going to answer when she heard the soft sound of his steps close by.

"I don't need another burden." The weight of his harsh words was like a fist driving into her back, the hurt exploding inside of her as she nearly broke under the emotional onslaught. Blood roared in her ears as tears fell, landing silently beneath her next to the blood also dripping from her face. He saw her as a burden?

Her hands dug into the earth beneath her as her mind was repeatedly ravaged by his words, and by the time she looked up, he was gone. Her hand raised to cover the wound as she slow regained her feet and stumbled off in what she hoped was the right direction. She wandered for what felt like forever, growing weaker and more confused with each step before hearing voices and turning towards them.

"Nisei chan! It's not like you to lag so far behind." Startled out of her thoughts, the Anbu captain glanced up to find herself surrounded by Kouki's team. Before she answered, she glanced ahead to see Kakashi and the others much further in front of her than they'd been before. All she'd ever wanted was his approval. Now, she found herself wondering why she'd felt she needed such a thing in the first place. Turning, she forced cheerfulness she didn't feel into her voice, speeding up a little more as Kouki's team fanned out around them.

"Just try to keep up, ne?"

-

Thank you for taking the time to read this chapter!

**Yomi:** Ibuki-kun, what is that in your hand?

**  
Ibuki:** ... ...the second half of this chapter... Amy and Lisa chan finished it. They told me to look after it.

**  
Yomi:** what happens in there? *tries peaking*

**  
Ibuki:** *slaps hands away* A lot of private things.

**  
Yomi:** as if this chapter wasn't private?

**  
Ibuki:** Mm!!


	6. チェイス Chase Part II

Here is the second half of Chapter Five! Amy and I have been cutting down how big the chapters are, as well as how big the paragraphs are. After about one more chapter, the story will pretty much become original, and it won't necessarily follow the plotline of the manga. Since, 1) Kakashi isn't on mission for awhile, and 2) Gaara isn't involved in the manga until much later on. Romance will be coming shortly. Thank you for your patience!

--------

Moon's Light, Reality's Dream  
月の光、うつつの夢  
Chapter Five - チェイス (_Chase_)  
Part II.

足跡を なぞる日は足跡を  
_I followed your footprints, that day I could hear your footprints_  
はじめから理解ってた　だから悲しくはない  
_ From the beginning, I understood, so it's not sad.  
_

Hitori crouched down as Kankurou glanced over at something that appeared out of place. The Anbu pointed ahead to where bits of Gaara's defensive sand seemed to be trailing, swirling almost agitatedly around in front of them. Blood that could have only belonged to Gaara gave some of the golden grains a dark maroon hue. The strange tracks cutting through the soft landscape alongside the footprints were another mystery.

Deidara's bird wouldn't leave such markings. Were the two separate tracks meant to throw them off? Her hand closed over the blood covered sand, squeezing hard as if she drew some form of power from it. Kankurou darted off again and Hitori found herself unable to keep her mind rational as she followed after him. He seemed far beyond driven by the ties he and Gaara shared. She didn't think she could ever understand such a thing.

"Where the fuck are they?" Kankurou's pace only increased with every angry stream of words that flowed from him. She wasn't inspired to reply to his words, knowing them to be the product of his anxiety. He had every right to be scared, but Hitori was more levelheaded, or that's what she chose to believe. She wasn't obeying orders. A letter should have been sent to Danzou the second she saw the Akatsuki member. And yet here she was, chasing after Gaara with the fierce intent of killing those who took him. "They haven't had enough time to get too far so we must be close, Anbu. Keep your eyes open."

Above them the purple sky was cracking into the streaked orange of dawn. An almost ethereal light bathed the two figures walking ahead in the blur of the heat waves already rising from the sand. Kankurou cursed under his breath, reaching a hand behind him to the scrolls on his back. He was going to prepare to battle straight away? Hitori's eyes narrowed at the careless gesture as she slowed behind him, reaching for the short katana on her back. If he was going to move irrationally, than she would do her best to back him up. He'd put her in a very awkward position.

Failure here would mean death. She wasn't familiar with Kankurou's methods, only that he used puppets. His chakra flow was weaker than hers, but she didn't doubt him or his skill, and that thought surprised her. The distance between them and their enemy was closing quickly as she followed his reckless advance. The two Akatsuki members must've known they were being hunted. Hitori had felt fairly confident at the thought of taking on Deidara, but the appearance of his partner changed everything. The file on the Akatsuki claimed the members were practically impossible to kill, and that made facing just one of them frustrating enough.

She wondered if she would have to use a specific jutsu that Danzou taught her for tough situations. It would kill her, but she was willing to pay that price save Gaara. Only one question remained. Was it strong enough to kill both of the men before them? She placed a soft hand on his shoulder. "Don't die, kabuki boy." Kankurou turned to reply, irritation flashing in his eyes, but he wasn't given the chance.

"Oi, oi…" The blond-haired Akatsuki member sighed as he hopped onto the back of the clay bird and looked to his partner. "Looks like we have uninvited guests at our party."

Sasori turned his bulky body around and watched as Kankurou and Hitori stopped just a few feet away from them. Black eyes that lacked any spark of humanity bored into Kankurou's. The Akatsuki member could sense something about the boy, something that made his mind want to play. "I don't like to keep others waiting. I'll end this quickly."

Hitori's eyes narrowed at Deidara as Kankurou moved, wasting no time rolling out his scrolls with precise, confident movements. Her partner smirked, his painted lips twisting before they parted to speak.

"I want to show you my puppet performance."

Hitori didn't miss the slight widening of Sasori's eyes or the smile that slowly crept over Deidara's smug face at Kankurou's words. Something odd was happening here. Taking another step back, she kept her eyes trained on the two Akatsuki members, trying to figure out what it was.

"Ah, that's right, Sasori. I nearly forgot." Deidara's lazy voice didn't match the ice in his eyes. "This Jinchuriki has siblings. He must be the puppet master. I think his name is Kanturou. Or maybe it was Kampachi..."

"It's Kankurou!!" The anger in his voice seemed on the bare edge of control, and Hitori almost sighed. Losing control of your emotions would lead to clouded thoughts, and Kankurou couldn't afford to have his mind in any more upheaval than it already was.

"Deidara, get out of here and leave me to play," The dark voice sounded more than a little amused as the blonde nodded and turned to leave. Sasori kept his eyes narrowed on Kankurou. "I'll be your opponent."

One look at Gaara's unconscious face caused Kankurou to react, his hands out before him as he started manipulating the chakra strings attached to his puppets. "Hitori, after him."

"I intended to." She nodded and closed her eyes, concentrating her chakra in her legs before she started running after the rapidly dwindling figure of Deidara. His strange bird was lifting higher into the air with every passing moment. The sand shifted oddly under her feet. Something was moving beneath her. Ignoring it, she kept going, her eyes never leaving her target.

"Watch your ass!" Kankurou's shout seemed perfectly timed with the appearance of a long metal scorpion tail rising out of the sand. Hitori moved quickly to the side and an odd wooden object took the blow intended for her. It was one of Kankurou's puppets. As the tail curled around it, she ran on as fast as she could, glancing back once as if to thank him for buying her time to escape. She wondered if he would be okay. Shaking her head, she reminded herself that there was no room for regret, for feeling anything at all. She was commanded to go after Gaara, by Danzou, by Kankurou... by her own instincts.

Don't die, Kankurou.

Deidara's plan would be disappear from sight, but she wasn't about to let that happen. Her limbs grew tired, and the chakra in her calves was practically burning the blood in her veins, but she had learned to withstand it. She paid no heed to her body's cries of warning, driving herself onward relentlessly. The sand gave way to forest, her feet once again meeting hard ground as she slipped a kunai free.

This terrain was what she knew best. With a push from her legs, she leapt onto the nearest branch and the kunai slashed out, leaving a clear arrow carved into the bark, a sign for Kankurou to follow. Hitori moved faster in the branches, even with the scoring of some of the trees she passed, until she was practically side by side with her quarry. The faint scent of Gaara's blood was the only smell she could take in. She'd be damned if he was going to die now. Protecting him was what was demanded of her, but that wasn't the only thing driving her flaring sensation returned - the one that had announced itself as anger.

Deidara was aware of the Anbu's presence, he just couldn't do anything about it. He silently cursed Sasori, wondering how his partner could have let anyone slip past him. The importance of this mission demanded perfection in every action. His pursuer was starting to bother him. Everyone knew the Anbu were persistent, but this one had a look in her eyes that told him she would be even worse than most. He idly wondered if taunting her would do any good.

"Master Sasori would be pissed off if he knew I was about to say this, but I figured since you're going to die anyway, it really doesn't matter!" Deidara called out to her, watching the Anbu's expression carefully. "The Kazekage is a host, and we want the biju inside him. It's always easy to just take what you want. Lives are very fragile, but so easy to control. Kind of like this guy here. He wasn't as weak as I thought, but he obviously wasn't strong enough, ne?" With an irritatingly casual gesture, he patted Gaara's unconscious head. "Now he gets to die for his weakness."

Hitori jumped across the open path, moving effortlessly into the branches closest to Deidara. The unexpected movement caused the Akatsuki member to speed up and ascend even higher into the sky. His cowardly behavior was nothing more than an annoyance. She made her way from one firm branch to the next, jumping higher and faster with each exchange. He was out of her attack reach, but she could still see the area he was fleeing off to, which was going to have to be enough information for now. She couldn't do a lot without a full team. Maybe Kankurou would catch up to her soon.

She descended lightly as the trees came to an end, looking around her warily at the new rocky terrain. The smell of water had replaced the scent of Gaara's blood. That realization caused her hands to ball up into fists. She steadied herself on top of the giant boulder and carefully scanned the quiet area. No doubt there were several nasty traps laying about for any intruders. There had to be something that would give away where Deidara had descended, this being the only possible location he could have disappeared to within such a short amount of time. An untold number of minutes passed as her eyes searched the area. Finally, she let out a soft sigh.

_'Gaara...' _Long, thick lashes fell closed against white skin._ 'I'm sorry.'  
_  
The feeling that she couldn't place now was like a pounding in her head. It aggravated and haunted her. She slammed her fist down, hoping the pain would draw her attention, but all she could think of was how irritating emotional responses felt, as if they replaced something crucial within her. She couldn't be sorry if she didn't know what the word meant, if she had never felt it. She wasn't allowed to feel this way. She wasn't allowed to be conflicted. If she saw Gaara right now... Would she be able to restrain herself from punching him to make up for the amount of frustration and confusion he's caused her?

Yomi laughed in the back of her mind, muttering about shadow puppets and 'I told you so.' Just the impression of his presence threw her into a memory of the bath house incident. She and Yomi were forced to stay a day or two, due to an injury that seemed less than convincing on his part. She realized, as they had been sitting across from each other, that he was just using the minor hurt as an excuse to slack off. The number of orders he sent out for banana pudding was sickening, and Hitori estimated that the establishment grossed over 500 ryos from Yomi's savings in that one afternoon.

Nearby one of the serving girls was being manhandled by a particularly disgusting old man. The occasional slap to her backside had turned into firm grabs. Yomi held his glass up to his lips as his dark eyes lingered on the scene, then moved to his partner, certain she'd noticed the incident as well.

"What do you feel when you see something like that happening to another woman?" Yomi scooted himself closer, curious now by the silence of the other Anbu. She turned her mask covered face, and heard perverse words leave the man's mouth as the woman continued to try and move, excusing herself almost desperately. The customers were always right, and some felt completely free to grab at the women who were serving them food.

"I don't feel anything. They're not our mission," Hitori said finally, giving Yomi what was possibly the most unsatisfying answer she could have. The way he rolled his eyes at her words merely confirmed it. This was why Yomi wasn't fit to be Anbu Root. He was filled with emotions when he wasn't actually on a mission. Hitori hadn't questioned it then, but was it okay to be Anbu like that?

Was it possible to feel emotions and then not, when the circumstances called for it? Emotions get in the way at some point. That was the reason why Danzou had so deliberately erased hers.

While the man paid his fee, Hitori watched without interest as Yomi grabbed the him by his wrist and twisted his arm behind his back. Then he did something typically Yomi - he found the man's wallet and dumped out every ryo out on the counter. Almost as an afterthought, the back of his hand pushed hard, sending the unfortunate man's face into the counter as well. Usually, Yomi would then walk away, and that's what Hitori had assumed would happen. Instead, he gently took the woman from behind the counter and walked her over to the staggering figure who was now quaking with fear before the diminutive Anbu.

"Stand still," Yomi ordered him in a hard voice, and the man was too shaken to disobey. A warm smile creased Yomi's face as he turned his attention to the woman, "I want you to hit him with the same force he used to grab you." Hitori watched as the woman slapped the man repeatedly, just as Yomi had instructed, until the idiot seemed to have learned his lesson.

With a final warning, and promise from Yomi to return if things should ever happen again, the two Anbu left. Yomi looked as if he was feeling quite satisfied with himself. He could feel his partner's eyes on him, and he could have sworn that it was a look of curiosity. Hitori was trying to figure out why he would do what he'd done in the bath house.

Yomi decided to indulge her. "Feelings are natural. You can't get rid of them entirely. I don't care who you are." He laughed softly before continuing on. "Just wait. It'll bite you in the ass one of these days. And when it does, I'll be there to say 'I told you so'. "

Hitori shook her head, wondering at herself. She wouldn't give up. Turning her back on Gaara wasn't an option. Failing him would be worse. Without another thought, she sprang into motion, searching every inch of the terrain nearby before coming to the water. She moved as quietly as possible. Small fish swam around and between each of her steps as she disrupted their small community.

The water was making an odd noise up ahead, as if the flow had been interrupted by something. Maybe she'd finally found what she was looking for. Wherever they were, it had to be somewhere nearby, somewhere on the water. She would continue searching. He needed her. Even as that thought bloomed, Gaara's voice echoed softly in the back of her mind.

_'I wish to one day be needed by someone...'_

It was an odd feeling.

--------

The Sand village was in chaos, exactly as she'd expected it to be. Kankurou had been brought back poisoned and near death, but Sakura was inside working on him, and somehow Nisei knew he'd be alright. She leaned back against the wall, shielding her eyes from the sun as she watched everyone and everything. What happened to Gaara was unfortunate, but it wasn't her mission. She was more than happy to help in any way she could, but Tsunade's orders came before anything else. Nearby, Kakashi was talking to Baki, and she strained her ears to hear the conversation, alert for any mention of what she was looking for.

"Exactly why are you here without your team, Nisei chan?" Kouki's voice caught her off guard for the second time that day, and she was glad her mask was still on to hide the frown she couldn't stop. She knew he meant well, and had a tendency to be overly curious, but it was really starting to become troublesome.

"I have my own mission for the Hokage. It just happens to coincide with this one, so I tagged along with Kakashi's team." He opened his mouth to speak again, but she held her hand up for silence, having just caught Baki's voice saying the word 'Anbu.' Kakashi glanced over, noticing her attention, and nodded at her before turning back to the other man. The Root she was looking for was definitely still here, then. Good.

"I'm sorry, Kouki san. I really need to see to this matter." Without waiting for him to reply, she slowly walked over to her former sensei as Baki turned to go back inside the medical building. "You didn't question him directly, I hope." The usual cold tone of her voice when she was forced to speak to this man had become downright icy. She blamed her unhappy trip down memory lane on the way here.

Kakashi blinked before speaking, and that was the only indication he gave that he'd noticed anything odd about the way she spoke to him. "Baki mentioned that we should be on the lookout for her, since she went out with Kankurou after the men who kidnapped Gaara." He never met her eyes, his gaze resting on the door to the building, his face unreadable. Nisei frowned a little, crossing her arms as she thought quickly.

"It looks like I'll be going with your team after all." She chose to keep her own eyes moving, not stopping on any particular thing, just taking it all in. The operative she was chasing was female. There weren't too many female Anbu Root members, which narrowed things down a little. Kakashi had gone back inside by the time the next question occurred to her and she wavered for a moment, wondering whether it was important enough to follow him.

Even if she was determined to prove to him that he'd been wrong years ago, it didn't mean she enjoyed spending time in his company. With a sigh she slowly followed, making a note of who else was in the room before stepping close to him and softly asking her question. "Did you happen to get the name of the Anbu?"

Apparently her voice was louder than she intended, because Kakashi hadn't had a chance to do more than turn a questioning look on her before Kankurou blinked open his eyes and frowned a little. "Another one of you?" He seemed a little irritated as their eyes met, then his closed again as he winced a little. "Her name is Hitori."

Once again, Nisei was glad of her mask. It hid all but the slight widening of her eyes that accompanied a look of shock. Danzou had sent that one here? She reached out and grabbed the shoulder of Kakashi's uniform, pulling him backwards a little. "Danzou's pet. I'm definitely coming with you." She ignored the way her mind practically groaned at the thought of how hard she'd already pushed herself. It couldn't be helped though. That particular operative was one of Danzou's most dangerous creations. Nisei should know.

She'd fought her once before during a training exercise, and been badly beaten. The memory of it still stung, and she pushed it all away in irritation. Everything was starting to fall into place now. The shorter one with the monkey mask would be Hitori's partner, Yomi. "Kankurou san, did Hitori come here alone, or did she bring a partner with her?"

Kankurou gave her an odd look before replying. "No, she's alone." Satisfied, Nisei turned and headed for the exit.

"Please let me know when you're ready to leave," she called back to Kakashi. As she stepped through the door, the harsh sunlight stung her eyes again. Moving her bag in front of her, she settled herself outside the building and began writing a message for Tsunade, outlining everything she'd learned so far, as well as informing the Hokage of her intention to join Kakashi's team in pursuit. It didn't take her long to finish.

As she sealed it she waved down a passing shinobi and gave it to him, instructing him to send it out for Konoha immediately. She tried to ignore the small drama going on with Kakashi's team, Temari, and some elderly woman not too far away as she checked over her weapons. Satisfied that she had everything she needed, she waited patiently for the team to start moving, then fell in behind them.

The sun began setting before they were more than halfway across the desert, and Nisei was glad to see it go. Suna was oppressively hot, even during it's mildest season. The hounds were having no problem tracking the scent from the fabric Kankurou had given them, and the odd, partially obscured tracks in the sand only confirmed that they were going in the right direction. As they ran, she tried to puzzle out all of the questions about her mission, but nothing really seemed to fit. Running off in pursuit with just Kankurou for support made almost no sense whatsoever.

Nisei was grateful to take to the trees again, feeling the difference in her straining muscles almost instantly as she leapt off each branch, always holding herself to the rear of the group. She'd already pushed herself further beyond her limits than she'd thought she was capable of. Her thoughts had started to wander again when a frustrated wail from Naruto brought them back, and she halted a few branches behind the others, watching as they all jumped to the ground.

"No, Kakashi sensei! We can't stop now!" Naruto flushed lightly, and his seemingly boundless energy was almost visible, like a chakra aura around him. "Gaara..."

"We all need to sleep, Naruto. If we're too exhausted to fight, we won't do Gaara much good, will we? It's a long run from Konoha, and we haven't really rested yet." His tone was almost gentle, and slightly bored sounding as he reprimanded his student then turned away, his eyes traveling up to watch Nisei as she leapt gratefully out of the tree. She tried to hide the way her legs shook at the landing, but he noticed it anyway as he walked slowly over to her. "You really need to rest, Nisei."

"No kidding," she snapped back, easing herself down gently and rummaging around in her bag. She was beyond needing to rest. A week of sleep might bring her back to her full potential, but even that was doubtful. Her tired body urged her to move faster, and within moments she was settling herself onto her bedroll with a heavy sigh. Keeping her back turned to the others, she eased her mask off and placed it carefully next to her, laying down on her side. Heavy lids closed, and a soft sigh escaped as sleep claimed her.

Kakashi kept glancing back, until he was certain everyone else was settled. Naruto let out a loud snore, as if to punctuate that he was, indeed, sleeping soundly. The Copy Ninja stared into the fire for several moments as the night deepened around them. Finally, he was the only one left awake.

With a quiet only he could manage, he moved closer to the sleeping Anbu and glanced down at her, marveling at how much, and yet how little, she reminded him of Rin. It wasn't that they resembled each other physically, because aside from the same black hair, they didn't. Nisei had something about her that made her more than the other woman. He couldn't quite put his finger on what that quality was, though.

He settled on one knee beside her, one hand reaching out slowly to gently move that long dark hair away from her face, still curious about the mark he thought he'd seen there earlier. She shifted slightly as her hair brushed her skin, but was then still again. He leaned a little closer, straining in the flickering firelight to find it again, and then it was suddenly there, clear before his eyes. A scar. A scar where he'd hit her, where her mask had broken under his hand on her face.

His fingers idly traced the mark along her cheekbone as the memories from that day came back to him. The way she'd stared up at him as he'd insulted her, not even making a rational attempt at explanation other than pointing out his failures. Her small arms had felt like those of a child beneath his hands, and he'd wondered if he'd end up breaking her before he could make her understand. He glanced back down at her face, stilling his movements, the tips of his fingers still resting lightly on her skin.

What was it about this woman that had always made him feel irrational where she was concerned? Her long hair felt like silk as he brushed it away from her face again, noticing how little she'd changed over the last few years. The most promising of his Anbu students, and the one who'd caused him the most regret. How many mistakes had he made because of what he felt when the weight of her golden eyes rested on him?

Those glances were cold now, her eyes only rousing that deep feeling of regret in him. It was impossible to change the past, and he honestly couldn't see much in the future in the face of her hostility. He'd been wrong, but he didn't know how to tell her, or show her that he knew this now.

One of the small logs in the fire cracked apart with a loud popping noise, and he drew his hand slowly away from her, already feeling a sense of loss as the warmth of her skin faded from his fingertips. Moving away quietly, he lay back on his own bedroll, staring up at the stars winking through the canopy of trees over his head. He knew sleep would be impossible to find, but that didn't bother him too much. Someone needed to stay alert and keep them all safe. His eyes fell on Nisei's sleeping form one last time.

Even if he felt like he didn't deserve it, it still was nice to see her.

--------

Chapter **Six **is completed, just waiting to be edited! Our friend will be doing sketches of the original characters in the story, which I will link up at some point, onto the author page. Woohoo! Also, Thursday's rock, don't they?


	7. 失われています Being Lost

**Author's Note:** Finally, the last chapter that consists in the manga arc. I, personally... LOVED writing the next chapter. Amy was pretty upset writing it. Probably because her character is Hitori, but... The Nisei hospital part is actually funny, I think. I think until the photo is finished because drawn of the original OC's, that I'll just post the inspirated photos in the Author's bio. So, be sure to check that out. Enjoy this chapter! Thanks for all of the page hits.

Moon's Light, Reality's Dream  
月の光、うつつの夢  
Chapter Six - 失われています (_Being Lost_)

知りたくもないような現実にただ無感情で  
_Still emotionless in the reality I don't seem to want to understand,_  
声も出さずずっと　瞬きすら忘れて　あなたに見蕩れていた  
_Forever silent, I was so fascinated by you I forgot to even blink_

Nisei tapped the heavy kunai against the palm of her hand rhythmically as she cast a critical look at the area around her. The ground had been crumbling around the team as they attempted to get the barrier open. That was the last thing Nisei remembered until they found the Anbu Root, who was now receiving medical attention. The captain crouched down to get a better look at the redhead, peering at her intently as she tried to figure out what the other's purpose was. Whose side was she on? This was her kunai, the one she'd left stuck in a tree to lead the way. She'd obviously been expecting Suna's backup.

"How's her fever?" Nisei asked the young medic beside her. Kouki's team was proving to be useful to this mission beyond her original expectations. Minase's medical knowledge gave her the ability to better explain Hitori's critical condition than the captain could figure out on her own. Nisei had been the one to find her - with a soft, fluttering pulse that only seemed to grow weaker until Minase got to work on her.

"The poison was easy enough to remove, but her fever wasn't caused by that. The wound below her ribs, and then cut across her chest…" The medic's head shook regretfully. "She's been lying here for hours, possibly even a day, slowly bleeding out. Whoever did this to her left her here intending for her to die."

Hitori couldn't open her eyes, and she wanted to see, wanted to know who was speaking these things. She could faintly hear a young girl's voice in her head, a child's ragged breathing. The acrid, metallic smell of blood mixed with fear, to become a bitter taste at the back of her throat. It seemed strange to feel it again so strongly.

Kouki gently placed his hand on Nisei's shoulder, drawing her out of intense concentration. Her golden eyes had been focused on the damage that was done to her fellow Anbu. She was still conflicted about her opinion of the other operative. Nisei stood up slowly, stretching and following Kouki. "What's going on?"

"From what I could tell, the Kazekage is dead."

"What?" Nisei's voice lowered and softened as her gaze slowly moved over Hitori. The girl's teeth were chattering, the fever continuing its rampage through her badly wounded body. Hitori's mission must've been to protect Gaara from this organization. There's no way it was a coincidence that the Anbu Root was present at this time in Suna. Danzou was holding more cards than he was showing Tsunade. Just how many of them were up his sleeve?

"They extracted the biju from Gaara and it resulted in his death. Team Kakashi are taking control of the situation as we speak, and so far there are only two Akatsuki members accounted for." Kouki sighed, aggravated with the entire situation. "Team Gai has yet to return from their set points after they removed the tags, and nothing has come in on our radios," Nisei could see the creases around his eyes that meant he was frowning behind his mask. "Naruto's temper seemed to be flaring the moment he saw them. He thought Gaara was still alive."

"Oh no…" Nisei struggled with the overwhelming sensation burning throughout her chest, trying not to let the tragic thought of Naruto meeting Gaara's dead body cause her to cry at such a hectic moment. Rescuing Gaara was the only drive Naruto had on this mission, the only thing he spoke about. Somehow these two had formed an amazing sort of bond, and now the one person Naruto felt he could fully relate to was dead.

"How's the Root?" Kouki's head nodded towards Hitori.

"Inconclusive," Nisei laughed sadly to herself, while gently resting against the nearest tree. "She left a trail for the Sand to follow behind her. It was an act of protecting Gaara, and also aiding the Sand. She's doing her job. I just find it ironic that the Sand's Kazekage gets kidnapped by the Akatsuki around the same time Red, here, shows up."

Minase peered down at the girl she was currently doing her best to heal. The glowing, earthy green chakra ran along Hitori's ribcage, then up along the dark, deep bruises, the tiny cuts in her skin, and eventually the gash across her chest. She wondered absently to herself how the Anbu didn't die, when it was quite clear that she should have. Perhaps strength of will or something silly like intuition? Minase smiled lazily to herself as she tore her gaze from the deathly pale complexion, and focused harder on the closing wounds.

The ground trembled again and this time Hitori groaned, her eyebrows creasing in a look of pain. Sweat glistened down her neck and covered her overheated and sensitive body. It was the aftereffect of being healed, her body forcibly rejuvenated by an unnatural source. A body resented having its natural healing process unbalanced, especially without its consent and in such a quick manner. It was a strain on an already delicate system, but a necessary one. Air seemed to both prickle and stab the Anbu's skin, and she instinctively tried to turn away from it, only to be stopped by Nisei's restraining hand pinning her shoulder to the ground.

"Hitori," Nisei's eyes narrowed as she watched the Root open her pale green eyes and take in the sky above her, before being able to focus on both operatives. "You're safe now. The Leaf has responded to Suna's request. Minase here has closed your wounds, but your fever is our main concern. If you can answer the following questions nod your head." Her voice held a soft tone that she certainly didn't feel, but it might get her more truthful answers than using an interrogatory style.

Hitori slowly nodded, unsure of what she was feeling as her body continued to tremble and shake, no matter how hard she tried to control it. Nisei smiled. "Good. The Akatsuki member who attacked you, what did he look like?"

It was difficult to remember, especially in her current damaged condition, but she tried anyway, forcing her mind into a more coherent state. She wanted to close her eyes. Her body felt heavier, more sluggish than she could ever remember feeling before. That surprise attack was impossible to completely forget, "He was…He had a black and white face, more gray than white." The Anbu continued, as she gritted her teeth to stop the chattering long enough to sound coherent. "It looked like he had some type of cage around his head, made out of a cactus, or other spiny plant."

"Very good," Nisei said, trying hard to not sound patronizing. Frowning slightly, she looked up over her shoulder at Kouki. "Did you see anyone like that?"

The Anbu captain shook his head, a quick, short movement. "No."

Nisei nodded slowly, her attention shifting back to the Root. "What was his fighting style? Do you remember?" Hitori winced as Minase pull her shirt down then gently settled her arm in a less uncomfortable position.

"He only used taijutsu. Though I'm positive he's capable of much more than that." The Anbu closed her eyes, remembering that he only used taijutsu because he could feel how weak she was. At least that's what he'd said, as he proceeded to taunt and then nearly destroy Hitori with hardly any effort. The power she'd felt in her opponent was frightful, terrifyingly impossible to overcome, and it was the first time Hitori had felt such degrading weakness during a fight.

_…Gaara…_

Nisei watched the Anbu Root's eyes fall closed as she once again slipped into unconscious. There were more questions she wanted to ask, but they could wait for a better time.

The next time Hitori opened her eyes she was standing, and firmly supported with her body weight pressed against Nisei. The loud scratchy sound and the light coming from what she assumed was a jutsu made her instantly alert upon her awakening. On the ground in the thick grass, was Gaara. Nisei didn't try to stop Hitori when the Root took a shaky step forward.

_Where did you go while you were lost in obscurity…?_

'I allowed them to take, and kill Gaara…' Hitori stopped as her world seemed to spin once more, and only a strong hand settling on her waist stopped her from making a scene that would have mortified her. She wasn't in the frame of mind to argue as Kankurou's hold kept her from falling onto her knees. For once, she was pleased to see him, relieved that he was alive. That feeling quickly receded as she stared at the present reality of Gaara lying motionless in the tall grass.

_In the dark, how scared were you…? Even now, do you struggle to find your way?_

_--------_

Nisei crouched down next to the exhausted Jonin, her hand resting lightly on his shoulder. He was crouched on one knee with his chest heaving, and obviously struggling to stay upright after using his Mangekyo Sharingan to absorb both Deidara and his explosion, and then teleport them somewhere different. She honestly didn't know how Kakashi could still be conscious after all that. A tiny smirk twisted her lips as she leaned a bit closer, unable to stop herself from whispering, "I believe you overdid it."

Kakashi kept his hooded gaze focused on the chakra leaving Chiyo's body, maintaining a soft, low voice as he replied. "I'm not the only one who will be in the hospital for a few days. Ne, Nisei-chan…" In spite of everything he'd just been through, she was sure she heard humor lacing his words.

She bit her tongue to keep from saying anything rude, watching Gaara's body flinch noticeably as life was pushed back into him. The only thing she could feel was astonishment as he slowly sat himself up. His eyes were wide, both shocked and confused, like someone who had been ripped out of heaven. Then her eyes fell on the Anbu Root, narrowing as she stared closely at her assignment. Hitori wasn't supposed to have feelings at all, but obviously there was something there. What, exactly, did she feel for Gaara?

Cheering and jumping people quickly blocked her view. The Anbu captain could no longer see Hitori, as Naruto stood next to Gaara smiling at the relief of Suna's ninja. They were genuinely glad to have their Kazekage back.

Hitori squashed the confusing emotions that had started to fill her, replacing them with something she was much more attracted to - finding the guilt in herself. Even if Gaara was alive, she had still failed. Danzou would hear of it, and he wouldn't be happy.

------

"So, you're staying here with the Sand?" Nisei asked, as Kouki nodded solemnly. "Alright then, if you're sure…"

"Would you get out of here?" Soft laughter came from him before he continued on. "I'm more than sure. Get yourself home and rest. You need it." He turned his back towards her, leaving her there with a look of confusion and a sense of being lost. She turned on her heel towards Team Gai, watching as Gai held Kakashi against his back in a forced piggyback style. The Anbu stopped, her eyes widening at the comical display as Gai sprinted his way into the desert, Kakashi's thin body seeming to flail awkwardly behind him.

"It's training!" Rock Lee cried happily as he bent forward and called to his team mate. "Neji!" Gai had laughingly challenged them. Whoever reached Konoha first would be the victor.

The Hyuuga's face turned up disdainfully. "Absolutely not," he declined almost politely, and swiftly walked past Lee, heading into the desert with TenTen close behind him.

Nisei turned to regard Naruto and Sakura who were taking their time to properly say their good byes. Next to Gaara stood his older sister Temari, and his brother Kankurou, who still had an iron grip on Hitori. There seemed to be many thoughts swarming Danzou's little operative. The Anbu captain decided to leave it at rest. She would tell Tsunade every happening when she returned, and Kouki would keep an eye on Hitori.

With a strong jump, Nisei started off towards Konoha, tracking effortlessly behind Team Gai, and too many thoughts racing through her mind.

------

"Hitori," Gaara turned to regard the limping Anbu as Kankurou staggered a little, turning Hitori so she would land on her bed. She kept her back towards Gaara, focusing her eyes on the wall in front of her. It was hard not to shiver, hearing his deep voice – he was alive. She couldn't care less about what happened to her now. The only acceptable form of failure was death, yet she was still alive. She glanced to the side, unable to meet his penetrating gaze, knowing that once she did, something inside of her would break.

"Thank you." Gaara's voice somehow blended perfectly with the oddly loud silence. The small compliment didn't have its intended impact. Hitori could only focus on one thing, especially in the face of those words. She didn't deserve it.

Kankurou smiled broadly. "Next time don't get injured. I don't know who else here I would boss around if you were dead. You're my new rival. Remember this inu-face."

She nodded slowly. It was impolite not to make eye contact, and even more disrespectful not to answer, but she couldn't make herself care. The feelings that were overwhelming her were unavoidable, they were indeed as strong as Yomi warned they would be. Of course, Yomi was always right. She smiled bitterly to herself, feeling even worse as she did. Holding back so much emotion, she barely kept herself still, though her lips trembled. The soft pats moments later indicated that both men were leaving, which would be for the best. No one should see her like this. Her body was still trying to conquer the fever, leaving her as physically weak as she felt mentally.

Kankurou rapped his knuckles lightly against the door as he left. "I'll send a medic with something to bring down that fever."

That left very little time for the Anbu to pack, but luckily she had very little. The first thing she grabbed was her Anbu mask. Her movements were quick, forced and painful. She placed the mask on her face as she slid her cloak down over her sides. Danzou would want her to return, right? She tried to think and rationalize though her mind felt incapable of deciding anything rationally. Her teeth were clenched hard as she tried to hold back the sounds of pain. Every movement was an agonizing chore.

She was trained to be silent, to slip by unnoticed no matter what, and she knew she could do this. There was still a massive celebration happening outside of the Kazekage building. It would be easy to sneak past them. She stepped outside the room and immediately made a right, walking swiftly as she swung the door opened and took a few careful steps, putting on a show for any who might glance at her, and doing very well at it. Her mind insisted, 'no, this isn't painful at all', before she rushed into the Sand.

Kankurou gently closed the door she'd left open, having stood behind it as he watched the girl sneak out. It had almost hit him in the face. He nodded to himself, fully understanding. He'd expected something like this to happen. Sighing, he gave the medical ninja orders to head back, but Kankurou kept the medicine he'd had the man bring. He was going after her, but first he'd have to discuss it with Gaara. Swearing, he started running upstairs to the Kazekage's office, muttering about troublesome Anbu dogs under his breath the entire way.

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Thanks for reading! Next chapter is pretty uhm... Well, It's pretty! So. I like to post chapters judging by the amount of hits. Usually, I'll post if there's about five. Just incase anyone is wondering why we don't post chapters when they're already written.


	8. 打たれて、血で汚されます Stricken and Bloodied

Author's Note: Hey guys! This is the seventh chapter. It starts to get humorous and also... serious. I hope you enjoy it! The next chapter is already written. Depending on the feed of this chapter is when we'll post it. Thank you for reading!

Moon's Light, Reality's Dream  
月の光、うつつの夢  
Chapter Seven – 打たれて、血で汚されます (_Stricken and Bloodied_)

重ねた指に　さらわれそうになる  
_ Intertwined fingers, they may get carried away  
_ 答えを求める滑稽さを理解ってたのに  
_Even if I understood the humor in searching for answers._

In the middle of a pleasant dream, there was a sudden annoying beeping sound that came precisely every five seconds. Nisei found herself stiffening, alert and waiting to hear that peculiar sounding tone. Sleep haze dulled her thoughts, but she knew there was some meaning behind that particular sound, if only she could place it. The Anbu captain slowly opened her eyes.

It was dark, except for a small lamp in the corner, and the pale bar of light showing beneath the door. She recognized the room immediately as one in Konoha's infirmary. Now that she was fully awake, it made sense that she was in here, seeing as how she could remember very little of the run back to Konohagakure.

Having recognized her surroundings, she fell back against the soft pillow with a sigh. There were too many blankets, all wrapped securely around her, suffocating her with heat, and she started to kick them off. It was impossible to sleep anymore than she had, which Nisei assumed was the point. She turned off the machine, then unhooked the wire which connected it to her as she sat over the edge of the bed, finally able to ease herself all the way up.

She wasn't alone.

"Where do you think you're going…?" Nisei froze at the voice, turning to stare at her room mate. Kakashi. A copy of 'Ichi Ichi Paradise' lay over his face. He had been attempting to rest until the girl woke him from his nap. His sleep was restless at best, but he was thankful for once that he was a light sleeper. Otherwise he would have missed the joys of being awake to witness something as humorous as this.

Nisei rolled her eyes, thinking, 'Of course I'm stuck in the same room with him.' Despite her pretensions to hating this man, she found herself answering anyway, "I don't need to be here anymore. I'm well rested, and I do believe I have a cat waiting for me at home-"

"Nisei." The Anbu froze, unable to stop a shiver at the way his voice enunciated her name, the tone he used. It still felt like he had authority over her as her sensei. She'd spent years getting it through her head that those days were long gone - which lasted right up until he spoke. She always seemed to find herself unable to escape the routine of the past. He laughed, the sound almost too loud in the silence of the room, "Tsunade won't let you leave without seeing you. I suggest you sit patiently, and wait for the next nurse to come around who can inform her of your condition."

Obviously, that would be the more mature thing to do, but Nisei hated that he had pointed it out. Tension sat there between them, grinning like a cheshire cat. She gave little indication that she acknowledged his point as she walked towards the door, needing to be further away from him - as far away as humanly possible while still maintaining a calm demeanor. The longer she remained in the same room with Hatake Kakashi, the more she found herself unable to maintain that facade. She nervously brushed her long, dark hair behind her ear, and kept her back towards him.

"Should you really be standing, what with four days travel behind you?" He asked, as he got up from his bed and casually crossed the room towards her. She felt the soft breeze from his body brushing past hers as he walked to the light switch and turned it on. Her eyes blinked, nearly blinded by the sudden vibrant glow flooding the room. "There. Maybe now you can see each corner of the room, contemplate every possible hiding spot, and... find a better way to escape from me?"

'Bastard!' she thought furiously, certain it showed in her eyes as she stared up at his face. She was more than determined not to argue with him, or to even bring up the past, since the issue was now apparently open for discussion. He raised a silver brow questioningly, his calm, unworried face growing more annoyed with each passing second. After several long moments of silence, onyx eyes left gold, and he made his way back to his bed. He was quickly settled comfortably in an upright position and once again staring at the pages of his ridiculous book. She was able to see the spiral tattoo on his arm, without his usual clothing in the way. The mark of his Anbu days would be forever left on his skin. As she watched him surreptitiously, Nisei caught herself wondering if he'd somehow found a way to forget about the past.

After the passage of long, unhurried hours, during which Kakashi appeared to be asleep, and the sun had long since begun streaming its light through their window, the door finally opened. Nisei still lay in her bed, having spent that time in an odd state of half dreaming, half waking. She was elated to open her eyes to tan and green clothing. Tsunade rested one hand on her hip with her lips tightly closed, making a slash of her usually full mouth.

"Nisei…" Oh, her tone immediately said she definitely wasn't happy. The Anbu winced before she slowly slid herself up in the bed, then looked at the Hokage with as much apology in her golden eyes she could muster. "You left your mission, abandoned your responsibilities, and left Team Kouki with your job. You are an Anbu captain…"

"I'm sorry, Lady Hokage…" Nisei bowed her head and kept it lowered, knowing that she should be ashamed of how she took control of the situation back in Suna. "It will never happen again."

"I supposed it couldn't be helped," Tsunade said gently, her frown fading as she crossed her arms. "The mission turned in an unexpected direction." She raised one eyebrow and rested her gaze firmly on the Anbu captain. "According to Kouki, Hitori of Root is no longer in Suna."

"I can go back. I can go find her." Nisei went to pull her blankets off, but Tsunade's warning glare made her stop.

She spoke quickly to the Anbu. If Tsunade could have smirked and said the next few words without showing signs of scheming, she would have. "You have a new mission, Nisei. More of favor, since you're reliable in my eyes. Or you were, up until a letter, and a frantic Shizune. You're free to decline, but the hospital needs beds, so I'm releasing Kakashi. There is a strict schedule he needs to maintain with regards to his medicine. Do you mind seeing to it that he does?"

'Do I really have a choice?' The Anbu stopped her line of thought, knowing that there was never an end to her sarcasm once it started. "Yeah, sure… I'll do it." Even she could tell, by the tone of her own voice, that she was less than enthralled by the idea.

Tsunade gave a short nod as her eyes hardened with determination. She was more than positive that as soon as Nisei was able to forgive Kakashi, her favored operative would again be able to work at her full potential. The past can be haunting, and it will linger with you until you're either able to resolve it, or let it go. The Hokage made her way over to Kakashi and stared down at the half-asleep Jonin, watching his face carefully. She had no doubt that he heard the entire thing. Tsunade firmly hoped that he would do his part to resolve this problem, since he had started it, and finally stop wallowing in his own selfish sense of guilt.

She sighed softly to herself, her gaze traveling between the two, knowing this long overdue battle had only just begun.

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Hitori leaned hard against the tree, bending so far forward that her hair swept around in front of her like a heavy curtain, obscuring her view of everything - not that it mattered. With the fever raging through her body, she couldn't trust anything her eyes might show her. Pain clenched at her chest and she coughed harshly, no longer surprised to see the blood that splattered the ground.

She straightened slowly, wincing at the effort as she wiped at the blood on her lips with the back of her hand. Konoha couldn't be that much further away now. Getting back was the only coherent thought left in her mind. Once she was there she could collapse, or even die. Maybe then those appraising turquoise eyes in the back of her mind would finally close and leave her in peace.

"Ne, Hitori chan, pardon me for saying so, but you look like shit." Yomi's voice snapped her head around, and she tried hard to focus her gaze on the small form.

"Now I'm seeing you, too? Get out of my head, Yomi." Her voice was rough, scratchy, and not much more than a whisper. Her foot took one shaking step, then another before she felt hands grasping her arms firmly.

"I'm sure you'll be wishing you'd imagined me before much longer." Something in the tone of his voice struck her as un-Yomi-like, and Hitori tried again to focus her jade eyes on him. At the moment, his hands were the only things keeping her on her feet. "Why did you come back?" The words had almost an anguished sound to them as he shoved her roughly backwards. "Danzou's furious."

The impact with the trunk of the tree made her gasp out the little breath she'd been able to draw in. Blood started leaking faster from the gash across her chest that she reopened at some point during her run. Every moment since leaving Suna had taken on a dreamy, unrealistic quality.

"I failed my mission," she finally answered. "I had no purpose there anymore. I.. I couldn't stay." Her eyes closed as she tried to push Gaara's voice, his words, from her mind. They echoed repeatedly, only driving home the sense of failure.

Yomi shook her hard, his eyes rolling a little. Beneath his hands her skin felt like it was on fire and he wondered how in the hell she'd made it this far with that fever and her wounds. "You..." he started, then angrily shook his head as he let her go and stepped back. "You've changed."

With something that might have been a self mocking smile, Hitori let herself slide slowly down the tree, not even feeling the bark scraping roughly against her skin. "You were right, Yomi," she gasped softly as she met the ground, her hands sinking a little into the soft earth beneath her. "Emotions bite hard... And it hurts."

He couldn't say anything back, not when every word she spoke only tightened the fist around his heart. The pain built up like a fire in his chest, and he allowed it to slowly turn to anger. Danzou's orders regarding Hitori had been clear. The entire time he searched for her, he'd wondered how he was going to carry out those orders, but now his way was certain.

"I told you so." With clenched teeth, and as much scorn as he could put into his voice to hide the hurt, he somehow managed to force the words out. Moving as quickly as he could, he ripped the Anbu mask from her face and tossed it to the ground beside her. "I fucking told you so."

Hitori flinched hard at his words, closing her eyes as the porcelain was torn away from her, and then opening them again slowly, doing her best to focus on the only person who'd ever called her a friend. "Take it back," she hissed, trying to force her body to stand. She knew the penalty for disobedience as well as she did, and it made perfect sense to her that Danzou would send Yomi to do the job. It was punishment for them both.

The back of his hand crashed hard into the side of her face, sending her sprawling on the ground. "I.." he stepped closer, crouching next to her as she tried to push herself up. "...fucking told you so." Pain nearly overwhelmed him as he slammed a fist hard into the middle of her back, a single tear leaking from his right eye as he turned her over. "Who was it, Hitori? Who finally got to you?"

She refused to answer him, even if she'd had the breath to do so. Blood was running freely from every reopened wound, staining into her dark clothes and spreading into the earth beneath her. At this rate it wouldn't take much to kill her. Finally the iron grip on her chest eased, allowing her to gasp out a few words. "You can do better than that." She made her voice as mocking as she could, anything to avoid answering his question.

"I don't need an answer, anyway," Yomi growled as he slowly lifted her, his knee driving into her chest as he held her by the shoulders. He knew her taunting manner for what it was. Hell, she'd probably learned that from him. "Do you think Gaara even cares that you ran away?"

Hitori wasn't sure what hurt the most - the mix of anger and pain in Yomi's voice, the images that came unbidden to her mind at the sound of Gaara's name, or her body making contact with the ground as her erstwhile partner slammed her forcefully into it again.

Yomi crouched over her, watching as she turned her head to the side and coughed weakly, blood spilling from between her lips. "You are ordered to return to Suna." His hands wrapped in the fabric of her uniform, pulling her up towards him as he leaned close. "If you break your orders again, you'll be killed."

A fresh torrent of blood ran down her chin as he dropped her and leaned back on his heels, turning his eyes away as her body impacted the earth. Drawing in breath felt like fire burning through her lungs. Pain dug its claws into every inch of her body, almost as if taunting her with the fact that she still lived. "I can't go back," she gasped softly, one bloody hand grasping at his leg with the little strength she had left. "Yomi... just kill me, please."

Now it was Yomi's turn to flinch, feeling something shattering inside him as he watched tears escape from each of her closed eyes, cutting thin lines through the mix of dirt and blood on her skin. The fabric mask she wore was torn, but still in place, and he felt an irrational urge to tear it away. His hand was halfway there when he stopped. "I can't."

"Then leave me." She let her hand fall away from him and sighed, waiting for the blank coldness of unconsciousness. Chills wracked her body, each movement just adding to her pain. She wondered how it kept growing and intensifying without overwhelming her.

The near silence of the forest closed slowly around them, only interrupted by her harsh, rattling breaths and the occasional bird call. Yomi's hand settled softly on her head, pushing the thick red hair away from her face.

"Now you really don't belong anywhere." His voice shook as he eased himself up off the ground. The sound of something moving behind him drew his attention, and it didn't take him long to recognize the person approaching them. Yomi kept his eyes away from the broken figure on the ground as he started walking away. "Looks like I was wrong. The Sand came for you after all."

Hitori heard his words as darkness crashed over her like a wave, obliterating the pain in its wake. The turquoise eyes in the back of her mind finally closed, and in the half second before unconsciousness claimed her completely, she found herself regretting the wish that they would. A strange sense of loss filled her, and then there was nothing at all.

Alright, so this is the end of the chapter. Amy and I would like to thank you for letting us know how much you appreciate our hard work. It's very difficult to put out chapters this fast. But we do it! Thank you.


	9. 役に立たないキス Useless Kiss

**Author's Note: **Hey guys! The eighth chapter is here. We're excited to reveal it and we really hope you enjoy it! Also, I will be changing the story to rated **M**.

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Moon's Light, Reality's Dream  
月の光、うつつの夢  
Chapter Eight - 役に立たないキス (_Useless Kiss_)

忘れないで　痛みを知るアナタに惹かれた事  
_ Don't forget, I was captivated by you - who knows pain._

Hitori could only lie there, waiting for the quiet embrace of death. If she felt she'd earned anything from this entire mess, it was an ending. She would rather die than return to Suna, than face the emotional turmoil that she knew would be waiting for her. It was too late for anything else. That knowledge only cemented in her mind the moment Yomi's fist connected with her face. Once, she'd believed Danzou's assertion that she was untouchable and flawless. She'd liked that feeling, as if she was unreal, untouched by the world she moved through like the wind.

Kankurou's strong grip was on her now, lifting her into his arms, holding her gently, but firmly against his chest. She recognized the scent of the wood oil from his puppets and the faint, comforting smell that seemed to come from the desert itself. Hitori eased her eyes open, slowly looking around with what would have been surprise if she'd had the strength to feel it. There were so many Suna black ops crammed into this small clearing, tensed and just waiting for a fight. Her eyes fluttered closed again as her thoughts hammered away at her. She wasn't worth all this trouble.

"Come on," Kankurou said in a quiet voice, one that she didn't recognize. His dark eyes finally met hers as she forced them open yet again. She felt unbelievably drowsy. "What the hell is your problem, Hitori? Are you trying to get yourself killed? Is that how Anbu works? The only place you failed your mission is in your own mind."

"I'm…" She shook violently, the raging fever and re-opened wounds, on top of the beating at Yomi's hands, all combined to take a heavy toll on her. Each ragged cough proved the damage, as more blood stained her hand. She couldn't force out the apology. It was probably for the best, since she'd have to wonder if she truly meant. Too many emotions were twisting within her, and yet fear seemed far away now.

"Don't talk." Kankurou's hand moved across her back as he eased her up, and allowed her head to rest against his shoulder. She didn't pull back this time, at peace somehow, yet vaguely haunted by the thought of returning to the desert. Soft, slow steps gave way quickly to a fast pace, and she knew exactly why that was. "Even though you failed to 'save Gaara', you did succeed at abandoning him."

"It wasn't my job to stay after that…" Apparently, she had been wrong about more than she first believed. "I should be dead."

"No, you should live. Always live, Hitori. That's the only chance you're ever given to correct the things you see as your mistakes." He felt her fingers tighten in the fabric of his sleeve. Kankurou wondered if she knew that he understood her sense of failure. It was deeper for him, since he'd not only failed his village, but his family as well. Temari's rage and fear were palpable from miles away. And when he returned, completely useless and near death, it was only to discover that he'd also failed himself.

"If you're this angry, then the Kazekage must be furious with me," Hitori muttered, choking on her own words. She felt overwhelmed by too many things, and the intensity of her fever had to be what was causing her eyes to water. She saw herself utterly pathetic, useless, and part of her resented Kankurou coming to save her. Somehow she'd even managed to fail at dying.

Kankurou grimaced, his steps never faltering as he let out a breathless chuckle. "Actually, he demanded I go to you, and that I bring these black ops with me - not for your protection, but in case you resisted."

"That's a lie…" She rasped weakly as her eyes closed, unable to stand the tickling sensation when they were open. "…he would never…"

"It's true that I'm the one who saw you sneaking out and requested to bring you back, but he was well aware of your condition and concerned about you to begin with. So, when he found out that you were making your way back to Konoha, which you didn't even reach by the way, he was both angry and worried." Kankurou stopped speaking as he looked down at her. "I don't think I've ever seen a reaction like that from him. He's changed somehow, and for the better."

She paused, hesitant to even speak again. "It's unlike you to be so nice to me…"

"Why wouldn't I be nice? I'm always nice to wounded, ignorant inu-faced Anbu who give up and lie down to die like dumb-"

"Ah, there's the kabuki boy I know." He smiled, kicking off of a branch. For once, he was glad to hear the annoying nickname.

He let the comfortable silence remain as the quiet sounds of the forest faded with the last of the trees. The run back to Suna was done swiftly, one mile after another vanishing beneath their seemingly untiring legs. Hitori slept restlessly through the entire run there. Kankurou wasn't surprised, though he checked on her frequently to reassure himself that she wasn't dead.

He wet a scarf and placed it against her head, hoping that it would somehow keep her cool in the blazing heat with her fever reaching its peak. The medicine from medical ninja seemed to be working. The only time he disturbed her was to get her to drink a little water now and then.

Even when asked if he needed help, Kankurou refused. He couldn't let her go. As much as she irritated him, he liked having the stupid girl around. She'd become a rival to him, and someone who was obviously important to Gaara, as well. That alone made her different than anyone else.

A heavy sigh of relief came from him as they entered the village and made straight for the Kazekage tower. He was thankful one of the other ninja offered to go get a medic, and concentrated on bringing her back to where she belonged. The door to the study sat slightly ajar, allowing Kankurou to ease it open with his shoulder and keep from disturbing Hitori.

Gaara looked up from his mountains of paperwork at the quiet sound of his brother's entry. His turquoise eyes narrowed at them, taking in the unconscious body lying limp and battered in Kankurou's arms. Her pale skin was marred with bruises and cuts, fresh blood stained her mouth and dripped slowly from her hand. The girl was trembling and sweating as the medicine fought her fever. He eased out from behind his desk and walked over towards them.

"Thank you, Kankurou…" Gaara stood there for a long moment, a worried frown creasing his face as he studied Hitori's pained expression. "Who did this to her? These marks are new…"

"It looked like another Anbu. We didn't get a chance to see much but the aftermath. Probably her punishment for returning to Konoha," Kankurou laughed, sarcasm heavily laced through it. "…Some welcome home, huh?"

Gaara's eyes closed for a moment. He could only imagine what type of operation Anbu Root was, especially with Danzou as the founder of it. His calm voice broke the tense silence of the room. "That's an easy enough answer. She's not returning to Konoha."

"I don't think she'll be okay with that." Kankurou's eyes went from Hitori to his brother as he nervously shifted a little. "She wants to leave because you…" His words trailed off there. It was a relatively new happening, one that made him completely uncomfortable with actually saying the words.

"I died." Gaara walked past his brother, not stopping until he reached the hallway. "Take her to my room. The hard bedding from her previous quarters isn't acceptable, and would only slow down the healing process. I'll speak with you later." He turned slightly to meet the other's eyes, his glinting with a flinty sort of resolve. "There are some things I must tend to…"

Before walking away, he looked down at the Anbu again. "Also, make sure that the room is heavily guarded by black ops. I don't want her trying to run away again."

Kankurou raised an eyebrow, watching Gaara leave before making his own way towards the sleeping quarters. His brother was being unusually generous. Of course, he was looking after the girl's best interests, but he'd never been one to 'tend to' anything. The way he'd said it made Kankurou curious, wondering if Gaara would actually use the Kazekage card to do something about this situation. All things considered, it would be completely justified.

He turned dark eyes down to the form resting on the bed before him as too many thoughts raced through his mind. Gaara's actions, and the Anbu's reactions, had him puzzled. What was he failing to see?

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"I have a cat waiting for me at home," Nisei laughed to herself, picking up the kitsune mask and glaring at it - the Anbu mask that had once belonged to Kakashi. She looked up at the ceiling as she contemplated what the hell to do now that she'd be forced to see him, interact with him, for the next few days. She honestly didn't want to. Nisei would have preferred to carry on her usual, unhealthy way of living with her past - letting the nightmares come, and watching them pass, breathing a sigh of relief until the next one.

When she had first found Kakashi's mask half buried in the mud, her natural instinct was to pick up and bring it with her. The next notion was to destroy it, which she had attempted once and failed at doing. Then came deciding what to do with it once she realized she was going to keep it. Her thoughts and feelings had swayed from returning it, to keeping it locked away and trying to forget him. The second had proved impossible to accomplish. In order for Nisei to ever face him honestly, she realized that returning the mask was the first step towards reconciling herself with the past. Besides, it didn't belong to her anyway. Keeping it any longer was entirely out of the question.

The short walk through Konoha at night was pleasant and peaceful. The usually warm weather was now tempered slightly by the evening's cool breeze. Dirt clouds puffed lightly beneath each step as she took her time, practically dragging her feet lazily towards the street lined with closely spaced apartments. All ninja received their perquisites and luxuries, if a luxury is what you would call it - paper thin walls and small compartments in a single, four walled room. Most of these apartments were shop owned, and Kakashi's was aptly located above a bookstore.

Nisei stopped and raised an eyebrow at the irony of it. This wasn't the first time she'd had to bring something to Kakashi, but her mind seemed to have missed the complete amusement of this particular ninja living above a bookstore, until tonight. Now all she could do was put a period next to the question mark in her head pertaining to Kakashi and his immense liking for love novels. Even back then, as she recalled, his room gave no indication of such a hobby. Not a single book had ever been in sight.

The room itself was simple, she remembered. There wasn't much to it, which fit since he probably didn't spend much time occupying it, anyway. It couldn't have been more unlike her room with it's disarray of puzzles and magazines, and the occasional plant that Nisei was likely to start talking to as she tended to it.

Sighing heavily, she willed her feet into carrying her up the stairs and down the tiny hallway to his door. It was left slightly cracked open, as she expected it to be. One, she didn't have a key, and two, this man should not be walking whatsoever. Tsunade had lectured her about it repeatedly when Nisei had returned to the Hokage's office for the medication.

Kakashi's body was nearly drained of all its chakra, which could have resulted in killing him. Supposedly, he's now suffering a case of severe vertigo upon standing, which causes dizzy spells and headaches. Nisei didn't have to wonder if he was regretting it, because he never would. Everyone would have died if he hadn't pulled that explosion into another dimension. He would see the injuries to himself as unavoidable collateral damage.

'And yet he seemed perfectly fine as he walked across the hospital room to flicker on the lights and prove me a moron', she sarcastically mused to herself as her arm nudged the green door opened. The light tan colored walls were the same, and oddly enough, she felt a brief wave of comfort wash over her at the warm familiarity. Some things had changed, she discovered quickly, at the sight of the chaotic stacks of books, like tall towers staking claims over the eastern side of Kakashi's room. Whichever room this might be. It was hard to tell with all that clutter.

"Nisei…" Her eyes widened slightly at hearing her name, and she turned, looking up to see the figure leaning in the doorway separating his bedroom from the room she was in. Nisei didn't bother to reply, she just knelt slowly and rested the bag on the table. Both of his eyes settled on her now. "You're a few minutes off of that very precise schedule you tend to keep."

"And you seem to be up and moving well. I'm sure you're perfectly able to take your medicine." She set the two pills down on the table, looking in the general direction of his face, but avoiding his eyes. "There you go."

Quietly, like some sort of unearthly apparition, he moved across the room and sat down at the opposite side of the table. With a steady hand, he placed both pills in his mouth and swallowed them dry. The mask remained behind her back, her nervous fingers touching softly over the shape of its nose. When would be the right time to bring up the past? Her fingers tightened on the porcelain when a small moment of habit overcame her, and she finally met that pair of onyx and crimson eyes.

"Ne, Nisei-chan, how are you recovering…?" His voice dropped as he studied her openly. He knew that Nisei would have a difficult time being here, though she tried to hide it from him, but there was something else tonight. He narrowed his gaze, as he often did while in deep thought, and her pale skin seemed to grow even paler. She was definitely hiding something from him. His eyes darted to her arm, which had lingered behind her back for quite some time now, and watched her slowly reveal the item, placing it on the table between them.

Kakashi recognized his mask as soon as her hand moved away from it. His silver eyebrows drew together with a mixture of confusion and touched realization. It was odd to be suddenly reacquainted with an object that had caused him grief on so many occasions. His thoughts turned to Nisei, and he nearly questioned her position on masochism. That day had seen the worst moments between them, but she'd kept his mask. He found himself more curious about the woman he'd once regarded as his student, and even occasionally as a child. Despite her skill, he could never let himself fully see her as someone who could handle being Anbu. And yet here she was, an Anbu captain, as if defying him and his conscience with her accomplishments.

"Why?" He stared into her golden eyes, as if he'd be able to see what was going on within her mind just through sheer force of will. Nisei had never admitted to loving him in the past. At that time, he had merely assumed, but now, with so much hatred evidently boiling in her blood, he questioned himself again. Why would she keep such a thing? His eyes hardened, as his gaze turned dark. He could barely stand it. How much could she hate him?

"I'm returning it." It was hard to force herself to voice even those few words, but she did it without stuttering, which was something to win an award for, given the current situation. Before he could say anything else, she climbed back to her feet and headed towards the door. "I'm sorry about everything. I was wrong, back then, for trying to stop you. It was not my business, nor my place to get involved…"

She was grateful that her back was turned to him. It almost saved her from the embarrassment of knowing that she had let her emotions eat at her again. Tears waited impatiently to fall as she closed her eyes tightly, and tried to will away the images of disaster: blood staining his grayish white Anbu uniform, slender muscled limbs covered in dirt, cuts, and bruises. She remembered staring into the glowing Sharingan, and feeling struck by the sheer power she could feel as his chakra roared. An overwhelming feeling struck her chest as her hand clenched the fabric of her shirt. Even as hard as she willed it to, the pressure there wouldn't go away.

Was she still breaking from that day?

_White roses cannot blossom under a crimson moon… _The steady rhythmic drum of her heart beat filled her ears, as sound and sight, reality itself, momentarily escaped her. _Even if I try to forget the anger on his face and the smell of war that radiated from his body, I will never forget the image. It's the image that breaks me. _Nisei wasn't sure what was real anymore or what feeling she was supposed to feel. Fear flooded through her. The fear that if she opened her eyes, she would wake up to that day and have to live it all over again.

"I became an Anbu captain to follow in the footsteps of the person who influenced me above all others at the most crucial point of my life. Even though you were no longer there, I still pretended as if-" She stopped suddenly as her back met the wall. His fingers closed tightly around the sleeves of her jacket, and she held herself still. The grip on her arms was firm, unbreakable. Suddenly, rationality escaped. A vague, unsettling sense of déjà vu hit her, and she tensed against the Jonin.

"That's enough, Nisei…" Kakashi murmured, his voice soft against the shell of her ear, as he tried to hold her still, forcing her into an embrace. He didn't fail to notice that her hands were pressed to his chest in a feeble attempt at stopping him. "I'm sorry for how much I've hurt you. The things that were going through my head that day were difficult to deal with it. I shouldn't have taken it out on you. I was wrong."

He didn't have enough strength to pull back, not with her like this, with the mental and emotional damage he'd done to her finally so visible to him. She shoved weakly at his chest when he pulled back enough to see her face. Kakashi felt guilty as a new thought corrupted what he'd been pondering. He shouldn't find her beautiful when she was a mess like this, with tears streaming down her face and that fixed angry glare refusing to let him ignore her dislike for him. It couldn't be right, or even slightly okay to feel the need to consume another person, to make claims, to act as if she was always his. His to abandon and then take back whenever he felt like it. He was painfully aware, especially in this moment, of just how wrong he could be at times.

Gently, his hand slid along her cheek and held the left side of her face as he leaned down, pushing all coherent thought aside, and not allowing himself to acknowledge what his own mind was telling him. Guilt, and everything else, fled the moment his lips met hers.

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Dun Dun Dun ! Chapter is over, but Nine is already being worked on. It'll be up within the next two days. Tomorrow or the next day. Thank you very much for reading!


	10. ディフェンスがありません Zero Defense

Hey guys! First of all, thank you all for the views! And also thank you for those who either **alerted **or **favorited**. It means a lot!

Moon's Light, Reality's Dream  
月の光、うつつの夢  
Chapter Nine - ディフェンスがありません (_Zero Defense_)

息はちゃんと出来てるのに　崩れそうになる  
_Even though I breathe out regularly, it seems like I'm going to crumble. _

Kakashi slipped his hand along Nisei's cheek and kissed her hard, holding her face gently against his. Unrelenting anger and hatred, all of her pain and fears – he couldn't bear knowing that he was the reason for it. He tangled his fingers in her hair as he pressed himself against her, pinning her hands to his chest, and her body to the wall. His lashes brushed softly against the tops of her cheeks. The kiss couldn't be shared if she didn't feel. What did she feel? She wasn't responding to him. He breathed in against her mouth, leaving her lips swollen as he leaned back, his arms falling to his sides as he took a step away from her.

The air in the room was thick with tension, and still she said nothing. His face remained calm, almost expressionless, as he studied her. He was determined to know if she felt anything at all anymore. There had to be something inside Nisei's heart that still functioned. Her hands balled up into fists, her face reddening with anger as those golden eyes glared up at him. The girl had been broken to begin with, but he believed that he'd found the major flaw in the defenses she'd built up around herself. He saw it coming, but chose to stand still, receiving the hard slap against the side of his face.

"Feel better?" He asked softly, watching as her eyes flashed dangerously. Without turning his head, he blocked the next slap that came towards him, keeping a firm grip on her right wrist. Heat from the previous hit spread across his cheek, burning and stinging, until he nearly felt satisfied by it. He pulled her closer, raising her right arm over his shoulder as he caught her left hand. Her back met the wall once more, and she was absolutely livid. "You're really stubborn. I finally give you what you want and you start behaving this way…"

Teasing the girl probably wasn't nice of him, especially during such an awkward, combative moment. She arched away from the wall, her back still sore from meeting it the first time. He was too calm to be reacting this way. Her mind whirled, wondering if he was just toying with her. It had to be some sort of sick joke. He'd hurt her badly years ago and now he was obviously trying to do it again. Why would he be different now? Too many conflicting thoughts plagued her while she tried to make up excuses for his actions.

Her voice dropped low as she angrily twisted away from him. "Let me go! I hate you!"

He laughed deeply, amused by how easily she let herself be riled. "Nisei, it was a small kiss. Don't get carried away. It was obviously a mistake."

"You're damn right it was a mistake!" She tore herself away from him, pressing herself closer to the wall. To get away from him, to have a moment to think, she'd gladly will herself through it. "What the hell were you thinking? Are you just messing with me now? Is it fun?"

"I just really wanted to kiss you…" His voice became softer and softer, as the vision of Nisei blurred and the room seemed to shift oddly. The floor beneath him suddenly felt too soft and he found himself unable to maintain his balance. Her flushed face wore a look of concern as she stepped away from the wall, and gently said his name. Perhaps that one tiny moment in which Nisei didn't seem to hate him was all he needed.

"Kakashi!" Nisei's arms tightened around his waist, saving him from an uncomfortable fall to the floor, and she held him up. His eyes slowly blinked open, but the effort of focusing them was beyond him. The scent of flowers, and something else he couldn't quite place, invaded his senses. Despite the scary whirl of the room, he felt slightly better like this, his selfish need continuing to fester the longer he stayed close to her. He wanted to be forgiven. Kissing her had both simplified and complicated his wants, making them seem like something else. Maybe kissing Nisei was a way to ask for forgiveness, but that intention was possessed by another desire entirely.

"Gomen ne, Nisei…"

Eventually the sheer size difference between them drove them slowly to the floor. She was certain that he was unconscious when his body collapsed on her, pinning her beneath him. The gentle weight of Kakashi caused her to allow most of it to happen. An attack of vertigo at the most appropriate time, it seemed. She slid her hands softly up his back and held him tightly, trying to keep even a hint of worry from her mind. The confrontation had only changed little.

"Again…" The sudden voice drew Nisei's eyes to the side, causing her to finally take notice of the petite pug named Pakkun, one of Kakashi's eight ninken. She released a sigh of relief, though slightly confused as to why he was here and summoned in the first place. In any case, it had been a long while since she and the infamous tracking dog had spoken. Pakkun's expression was always just as lazy as his master's. "I suppose I can return, now that he has company."

"You heard us?" She asked, peering at him over Kakashi's shoulder. The complacent look on the dog's face gave it away. "Sorry about that."

Pakkun shook his head a little, his jowls flapping comically, before he let out a sigh. "He keeps pushing himself, and then crashes like this. He still reads despite the Hokage's warnings. It makes him dizzy, so keep the books out of his reach."

She laughed softly as she eased herself up and carefully shifted her former sensei before attempting to stand. Nisei put on quite a show for the pug as she staggered back and forth across the floor with Kakashi until she successfully reached his room. She wasn't surprised to see that he had upgraded from a floor mat to a bed. Nisei turned to regard Pakkun, only to discover that he was already gone. With an exasperated sigh, she pulled the sheets down and settled the Jonin into his bed. The Leaf symbol was printed on his red and black sheets. Maybe he'd become less predictable.

After pulling the sheets up over his body, she found a comfortable spot on the floor, and leaned back against the wall. There was a lot of reading material to keep her busy. She reached for the book on his end table and brought her legs up, resting the volume against her thighs as she flipped through the pages. An eyebrow arched at the explicit photos on every other page, and the words to the story itself weren't much more than a jumbled mess of hentai eccentricities. Kakashi Hatake, closet pervert? Then again, he read this book out in the open, and even while teaching children. She doubted he truly cared about anyone else's opinions.

Nisei decided that she'd wait out the two hours until it was time to administer his next dose of pills. She'd keep a close watch on him, to make sure that his sleep pattern regulated, and that his breathing calmed, before even thinking about returning to the Anbu residence. Kouki would have returned by now, anyway, and teaching her class could be tiring, especially with Ishida thinking that he could run the place. She felt a slight twinge when she thought of her students. Perhaps she missed them more than she thought she would, even if the current circumstances seemed beyond urgent in her thoughts.

She sucked her lower lip in between her teeth, and bit down hard. The tingling sensation from his kiss still hadn't gone away

------

She felt lost, as if reality had fled from her and nothing made any sense at all anymore. Vague impressions of strange conversations twisted within her mind. Just when she thought she had everything figured out, she'd open her eyes to see a different face than the one she was replying to. And exactly what had she said? There were too many questions, and too many unsettling answers.

Hitori blinked her eyes open, trying to find something to focus on, but her gaze refused to stay in one spot. Shadowy movements near the door made her tense, and the last of the fever hanging on made her entirely irrational. A hand reached for her, and in spite of the weakened condition of her body, she reacted the only way she knew how - by fighting.

As her fist made contact with something, she heard a soft, surprised sound and then everything started to spin. When her mind cleared again, she felt heavy, almost as if she was sinking into the bed she rested on. Pain burned quickly through her, then faded as her jade eyes slowly cracked open again to meet the turquoise gaze that haunted so many of her fevered dreams.

"If you're finished...?" Gaara was leaning over her, pressing her body into the bed and holding her still, his face passive as he looked down at her. He was surprised she'd been able to move at all, much less so quickly, given the amount of damage her body had taken in the last week.

The skin beneath his hands was only slightly too warm, as the medicine drove the fever out of her, and the wide, pale green eyes gazing up at him were clear for the first time since Kankurou brought her back. Satisfied that she wouldn't start thrashing around again, he released her and resettled himself in the chair beside the bed.

"I.. I'm sorry, Kazekage sama. I didn't realize..." Her voice was a whisper, every word she forced out, an effort.

"You're healing fast." His deep voice interrupted her, the sound making her shiver a little as he leaned back in his chair, crossing one leg over the other, his eyes never leaving hers. That direct gaze made her shift again, an uncomfortable feeling passing through her.

Her eyes darted almost frantically around the room, the need to escape pushing her to the edge of panic. She didn't know how or why, but being around Gaara was like breaking apart inside. Nothing, and no one, had ever made her feel anything - until him. Pain had always been a physical sensation and something easy to distance herself from. She had no defenses for an emotional onslaught, having never needed them before. It was all entirely overwhelming.

Hitori nearly jumped when Gaara leaned forward again. his fingers just brushing lightly over one of the livid purplish marks marring her arm. His eyes still held hers, and she could see that he knew she'd just been looking for an escape. He didn't say anything, but stood up slowly and walked over to the window, standing there in profile to her as he looked out over the village. Shadows moved everywhere, and she knew that it would be impossible for her to leave without his permission. What she couldn't understand was why he wouldn't give her that permission.

"I have a letter from Danzou, ordering you to remain here until I see fit to release you." He slid the folded paper from his sleeve as he turned towards her again, trying to gauge her reaction to his words. Why did he care so much? Turning back to the window, he remembered how it felt to see her laying unconscious and broken in his brother's arms. Anger, pain, worry, and the sickening sense of loss that accompanied thoughts of her possibly dying, all mixed within him in a turbulent storm, though his face never changed expression. To care like this for another person was an entirely new vulnerability.

"Hai, Kazekage sama," she answered softly, her gaze lowering to the blankets laying over her. Never before had she wanted Yomi around as much as she did right now. He would know exactly what she should do. His voice had gone oddly silent in her head, though. She was no longer surprised to find that she missed it. If she did somehow manage to leave Suna, to escape, would she miss Gaara, too? It was an unsettling thought with an even more unsettling answer.

A brilliant purple butterfly floated in through the window, circling Gaara's head once before alighting on the hand he held up. It's wings moved slowly as he walked over and sat on the edge of the chair again, leaning towards her, holding the bright insect where she couldn't avoid seeing it.

"Strange, isn't it, to see a butterfly in the desert?" His voice was soft as he contemplated the insect, it's wings mimicking flight in slow motion. It moved a little along his hand, then settled again. "You would think it wouldn't be able to survive here. That it doesn't belong." With deliberate slowness, his free hand lifted one of hers and placed it next to his, watching as the butterfly moved to settle on her slightly trembling finger.

Her eyes met his questioningly, and he smiled a little before continuing. "Everything, and everyone, has a place, even if they don't seem to fit there. Sometimes it's hard to tell where we belong." Her hand still rested lightly in his as the butterfly moved slowly, it's wings just brushing where their skin touched. "Sometimes, it's a choice we have to make."

Kankurou stood quietly in the shadows around the doorway, watching his brother with the Anbu, and frowning lightly in concentration. He felt oddly uncomfortable, as if he'd just accidentally eavesdropped on a private moment. Gaara was being so gentle with her, and Hitori looked confused, and maybe a little frightened. They made an odd picture, even if it seemed to somehow make sense.

He continued watching as the butterfly fluttered it's wings and then slowly flew out the window again. Their joined hands lowered to rest on the bed, but neither moved to break the contact, and Kankurou stepped further away from the door. Leaning against the wall, he raised one hand to his mouth, questions tumbling through his mind.

Their eyes met and held, though no words came to break the silence, and he turned away, walking back down the hallway. With all these new thoughts in his head, he couldn't even remember why he'd gone to his brother's room in the first place, besides wanting to check up on Hitori. Whatever it was, it wasn't important enough to interrupt what he'd just inadvertently seen. He'd take care of it later, if he ever remembered his original purpose.

Hitori felt almost like she was drowning in a sea of confusing emotions when her eyes locked with Gaara's. There was something oddly comforting, and strangely pleasant, about the way his hand lightly held hers, and it made her reluctant to pull away. She also refused to question that feeling, terrified of the dark, foreign place it led her thoughts to.

"If I have a place, it's in Konoha, with Anbu." Her voice was soft, but it was hers again, and even as she spoke the words, she felt the uneasiness of doubt creeping over her at hearing them. His gaze turned pointedly to the bruises on her arms, then her face, before his eyes slowly closed, his grip on her hand squeezing just a little tighter before relaxing again.

"Did you ever stop to think that maybe you have some purpose other than being Danzou's hands and eyes?" The words seemed almost bitter, carrying just a hint of emotion before he sighed softly. "You're supposed to have desires of your own. For yourself."

"I..." She trailed off, uncertain of how to answer that. The cage she'd kept locked so tightly around herself was falling apart at his words. How did it feel to want? Had she ever truly wanted anything? And then it struck her. Danzou prided himself on having erased her emotions, making her a perfect ninja, as he put it. But if the driving force of her life had been the desire to successfully complete each mission, to please her master, wasn't that an emotional response?

Gaara watched the changing expressions on her face, in her eyes, feeling her confusion. He didn't even want to imagine the methods Danzou had used to make her this way. The cruelty of other people was something he was all too familiar with. His hand released hers as he rose slowly from the chair. "Rest now, Hitori. You're still very weak. I'll come back to check on you again in a little while."

She watched him walk to the doorway, her hand still feeling the soft warmth of his. "Why are you being so kind to me?" She didn't realize she'd spoken the thought aloud until he turned, and their eyes met one last time.

"I learned a lot from being alone." His reply continued to echo in her mind long after his footsteps faded into silence.

-------

That's the end of this chapter! Next chapter is called, '_Recovery Phase_'. Thanks for reading!


	11. 回収段階 Recovery Phase

**Author's Note:** I was a little late posting this... Oh boy. Sorry guys! I overslept. Thank you for the reviews, and the views on the story! I hope you enjoy!

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Moon's Light, Reality's Dream  
月の光、うつつの夢  
Chapter Ten - 回収段階 (_Recovery Phase_)

再生の朝　綺麗な花に成るだろう  
_ On the morning of rebirth, it may become a flower_

Nisei woke up slowly, drawn to consciousness by her uncomfortable position on the floor. Glancing down at the book still in her lap, she paused. She wanted to get to her class early enough to stop Kouki from teaching it. Her eyes trailed up to the bed where Kakashi was still dreaming deeply. He must've been beyond exhausted. She moved quickly to her feet and set the book on the floor, hoping that the Jonin wouldn't attempt bending over to get it. If he did, his world would once again fall out of place. It was an evil form of punishment, but he was supposed to be recovering, and it was time he remembered that.

'I can't believe I fell asleep after giving him that second dose of his medicine! I'm horrible…' she scolded herself, as she pulled on her cloak. Slowly, the more she woke up, the more she began to remember last night's events. That kiss…She stood at the side of his bed, her fingers moving idly over her lips. He'd stolen the first kiss she'd ever received. It was slightly embarrassing, but Anbu life left no time for regular dating activities. Not that her mind had wandered there at any particular time. What time did she have to spend on such things?

She pressed her fingers into the bed and leaned down. He looked peaceful while sleeping, despite the pink in his cheeks, and sweat beading along his forehead, both indications of his fever. Silver eyebrows drew together, as if expressing pain, and he turned his face towards her, his thin pointed nose sliding beneath the sheets. Even while sleeping, he managed to cover his face. She suppressed a burst of laughter as she pulled back and continued through the small apartment, then stepped outside. The warm weather assaulted her the moment she was under the sun's rays. Luckily, the walk to Anbu's headquarters was short.

That walk quickly became a race to get out of the uncomfortable heat and behind closed doors. Nisei glanced around the training area. It felt like a barren wasteland. Even the tools were put away. Not even one single operative could be found in the most trafficked room they used for training. Perhaps they were all outside in this beautiful weather. She walked through the wide double doors and looked out into the open meadow. The various dummies carved from wood stood perfectly straight in the dirt, and other thick wooden pieces were hung on the front of the trees. Kunai-less, unmarred, new – someone had changed things.

"Nisei-chan!" Kouki called out as he waved, seeing the Anbu captain standing there with a confused look on her face. He placed down the blocks of wood he was holding to cross the distance between them. "You're not supposed to be here for another week. I'm covering your classes until Tsunade says I can stop undergoing mental torture."

She smiled at his joke, thinking fondly of her little tyrants. "I'm sorry about that, though I can't help but notice that no one is here today."

"Only because you're late. I just sent them to the shower rooms, and to bed. Tsunade called for all available operatives for interrogation. It was something about an Anbu going rogue, so they were tired to begin with. We had an early training session, and now they've gone to rest. Tonight I'll work them again, and get them back on their schedule." Kouki gestured towards the new, more complicated training grounds. "What do you think? The summer keeps pressing on. I figured I'd make the practice yard more accommodating."

"It looks the same, just fresh pieces of wood…" She walked over towards the nearest tree, and rested her back against it. He gasped, mock-insulted, as she laughed. "Once again, I'm sorry, Kouki-kun. Last night was just…odd."

He sat down on the stack of logs, staring up into her gold eyes, curious now. "Oh? What exactly happened last night, I wonder."

Immediately, a soft blush colored her cheeks as she remembered Kakashi's kiss, and her heated reaction to it, slapping him as hard as she could. "I returned Kakashi's Anbu mask."

The senior Anbu captain couldn't hide his irritation. "How did he respond to that?"

"He apologized." It wasn't a lie, but it also certainly wasn't the truth, and it made her squirm just a little to think of it that way. With a shrug, she pushed off of the tree and started to walk away. She was forced to stop, finding herself caught in Kouki's firm grip. His choppy, blond bangs stayed in his face, shielding his dark blue eyes from meeting hers. She glanced away biting her lip, having known that eventually this day would come. "Kouki…"

"After everything he's done to you, after he left you and put you through the darkest part of your life... you'd still return to him?" Frustration colored his words, even though he managed to keep his voice low. "Sit." Out of respect, she did as she was told, settling on the opposite side of the twin set of logs. He started to light the fire pit between them, remaining quiet for a long time while he sorted his thoughts. "I found you that day, when you were roaming out of the forest. I saw you collapse in a bloody mess, with the wound that left that scar under your eye."

He pointed to it briefly, emphasizing it as he continued. "I know Kakashi is the one responsible. I know that you felt like it was your duty to stop him, but that kind of person is unreachable. He doesn't want to be loved. Hatake Kakashi, the emotionless Ex-Anbu captain. Nisei, don't waste any more time than you already have. I don't want you to be hurt in the end."

"Thank you for the concern…" She paused, trying to digest everything that he said. It was without a doubt all true, but obviously something had changed after last night. Whether it was a joke or not, Nisei would be unable to forget about the way it felt to have his lips on hers. The one who stole her first kiss, the only person she had ever thought about this way. No one else was Kakashi. Being alone didn't matter. "Kouki, you're my closest friend. Don't do this, please."

"You know that we could be more. I've never made a secret of how I feel..." He said with deliberate slowness, his meaningful gaze meeting her saddened expression through the spiraling flames. If Kakashi hadn't existed, she would have ended up with this man. He's strong, usually quiet, and if not quiet, then serious. Their friendship had opened up many doors, and it had closed others. She'd seen many sides of Kouki, but as long as her former sensei had a pulse, Nisei couldn't see it ever being possible for her to be with someone else.

"I don't care if he'll never accept me in that aspect, so long as he looks at me." Her voice quaked, she was shaking now, afraid of what she was feeling. She had been dead set on never seeing the Jonin again, but ever since the last mission, her feelings were starting to come back - those pathetic, ridiculous feelings. She tried to best these thoughts, but she knew damn well that in the end, she would just give in. "So long as he's seeing me. I want him in my life again. It's better than not having him at all. You should know that better than anyone."

"Nisei, he can't have you!" Kouki shook his head in angry denial. It was impossible for Kakashi to ever have her after what he'd done. He couldn't understand this overpowering feeling. It went far beyond anger. Kouki knew Nisei better than Kakashi did, or so he liked to believe. He knew that the superior one would win her in the end. The control Kakashi had over her... He wondered if the Jonin knew that such a thing existed within his grasp. "I won't let him have the chance to do it again."

She let out a sigh. "This argument can and will go on forever. I'll just leave now."

He gripped her arms again, before she could walk away, and shook her. "Nisei! Stop and think about what you're saying. I'm not letting you leave until you've come to your senses."

"What if I choose not to-"

"Nisei-chan."

She froze upon hearing that soft, familiar voice. This couldn't be possible, not with Kakashi in bed, dizzy and exhausted. There was no way that he got up, got dressed, and walked over to the Anbu quarters. As she slowly turned her head, reality seemed to prove her wrong. There stood Kakashi, with his usual lazy expression, mask in place, and wearing his heavy Jonin attire. The Leaf forehead protector covered half of his face, but she was certain that his fever hadn't broken yet.

The Jonin raised his hand up and shook the pill bottle. His friendly eye-crease appeared. "I believe that you're late."

Kouki looked to the side and Nisei couldn't ignore the feeling of his short nails digging into her arms, as his grip grew even tighter before he let her go. She gently reset her footing as Kouki slowly drew away and left her standing there, confused. He was walking purposefully towards Kakashi. After the conversation they shared, she wondered if Kouki would actually say something to the Jonin. She mentally prayed that he'd just keep walking.

Despite the fact that Kakashi was smiling behind his mask, he couldn't completely hide the struggle that was evident on his face. He was incredibly ill from using the cursed Sharingan, and shouldn't have been out of bed in the first place. Something hadn't felt right when Nisei left, and then her not showing up to make sure he took his pills, concerned him - not that he needed a babysitter. Kouki stopped inches away from him, with a hand resting on his hip as he took a long look at Kakashi. "You don't look so good, Kakashi senpai."

Kakashi's eyes narrowed. The fever wasn't helping, and he felt on edge.

Kouki let out a short, sarcastic laugh. "It's a good thing you have Nisei here, to help take care of you, ne?" He continued when Kakashi didn't answer, his voice only audible to Kakashi. "If you hurt her, nothing will keep me away from making sure that you pay for it this time. Got it?"

The eye-crease appeared again. "It was nice seeing you, Kouki-kun."

Just as Kouki left, the concealed expression on Kakashi's face dropped, and he swayed slightly. The moment he showed the slightest imbalance, Nisei was beside him, wrapping her arm around his back and steadying him on his feet. He didn't say anything as he draped his arm around her shoulder, and started to walk with her. It appeared he would need help back to his apartment, after all. It felt right being here, but also wrong. What he'd witnessed was none of his business.

"Why did you get out of bed?" There was the argument he knew would happen. He let her continue, knowing that she was nowhere near finished. "You're in no position to be walking around your tiny apartment, let alone halfway across the village!"

Whether it was sheer pride, or the constant reminders of being bedridden, he effectively dodged her questions with one of his own. Her personal matters were things that weren't really his business, but maybe those were the things he _should_ be questioning. "What is Kouki to you?"

"My superior, and my friend." She carefully helped him down the steps. As soon as he was outside of the Anbu building, he pulled away and stood to his full height.

"That was awfully close for a friend, Nisei."

"Maybe we could have been more, if things were different," she answered truthfully, while looking away from him. "Why does that matter now?"

"Ask Kouki."

They locked gazes for a long moment. The wind shifted comfortably around them, the chilly breeze nipping at their exposed flesh. It felt good in the summer heat. The silence in the village was unusual, but it was fitting for the moment. Gold eyes flashed at onyx. He placed a hand inside his pocket, his lazy stature making him look incredibly thin. It could also be that he didn't seem to have food in his house, or she'd never caught him eating, at least.

"We're just friends," Nisei finished, as they resumed walking. She kept to a slow pace, not wanting to risk the chance of Kakashi becoming dizzy again. But other thoughts were starting to plague her now. Why had Kakashi asked her what she thought of Kouki? He didn't care about things like that, especially when it pertained to her.

He opened the door to his apartment and immediately went into his room. She could hear the ruffling of clothes. He was probably melting with the heat, wearing that uniform with a fever. Despite the summer weather, the Jonin felt the need to cover as much skin as possible. She had to wonder about his secrecy. He was probably now changing back into the tank top and loose bottoms. She would see about finding him some food and a fan when she went shopping in a little while.

It was the perfect time to go, seeing as how he'd gone out of his way to avoid her.

She knocked softly on the side of the doorframe. "I'll be back. I'm going to the market."

Frowning at his lack of response, she peeked her head in to look at him. Her cheeks flushed as her eyes widened at the scenery. His arms were sprawled out across the bed, positioned upwards towards the pillow. He kept his head to the side, that mass of silver hair in his face without the forehead protector in place. Her eyes followed the thin tip of his nose to his parted pale lips, then along the junction of his neck and shoulders, continuing along his gently muscled back. Sweat added a shimmer to the light ups and downs of his breathing.

He had already passed out.

------

Hitori tried to will herself to stop trembling, mentally cursing the weakness of her body, as she pulled her fabric mask up over her face. Her Anbu mask must still be laying on the forest floor where Yomi had so casually tossed it, because it certainly wasn't here. She'd just have to be without it. With an unusual amount of impatience, she pulled a brush through her long, crimson hair. Just because her mind was a mess, that was no reason for the rest of her to be disheveled.

The guards at the door watched her as she stepped out, but made no move to stop her. That, at least, was promising. Small, silent steps led her to the room where she knew he would be sitting behind a mountain of paperwork, that same calm, unruffled look on his face as always. Just the thought of facing him brought back the simmering, irrational feeling of anger she was coming to know all too well.

She stepped into the room, glancing around quickly. Aside from Gaara himself, the room was deserted, which suited her very well.

"Should you be up and moving around yet?" His calm, quiet voice snapped her attention immediately to him, and she was thankful that his eyes were still on the papers in front of him. The uncanny ability he had to know what she was thinking made her nervous and uncomfortable. A moment passed during which her voice seemed locked in her throat. Hitori shook her head slightly, took a deep breath, and tried again.

"I want to go home." His eyes finally met hers, and she nearly froze, but forced herself to continue. "Please."

"No." He turned to the side after answering, but watched her out of the corner of his eye, wondering if she knew just how much of herself she gave away with those innocent jade eyes. "You've been ordered to stay here until I see fit to release you."

She blinked in surprise at the quick denial, her hands slowly clenching into fists once the moment of shock had faded, though she kept her voice calm. "And how long do you think it will be before you 'see fit' to release me?"

"That I don't know. It could be never." Gaara turned back towards her and met her eyes again. He could almost feel the heat from that furious glare. Narrowing his eyes a little, he propped his elbow on the desk and rested his chin on the back of his hand. "To tell you the truth, Danzou seemed pleased to be rid of you." Lifting a paper from his desk, he appeared to read from it. "This refers to you as a 'failed experiment' that I may 'feel free' to do with as I please, and should you ever return to Konoha," his turquoise eyes held hers as he spoke the last words, "you are likely to be killed on sight." Leaning back a little in his chair, he crossed his arms lightly over his chest. "If all the information I've been given is correct, you are, in fact, now considered rogue. Your master has no use for you anymore."

A jolt of pain tightened her chest. The sensation was like being hit, only deeper. Anger swept through her accompanied by strange impressions: the furious sting of sand driven by a harsh wind, the smell of blood lingering in the air, cold, lifeless skin beneath her fingers. All of these things combined to drive her to her knees, her head hanging down as she stared at the floor, feeling the welling of tears in her eyes. The overwhelming weight of sorrow, the ache of loss, pressed down upon her. How strange it felt to lose what you never knew you had.

Gaara watched her silently for several minutes, waiting to see if she had any reply to what he'd said. Her hands remained clenched, the knuckles white. He wondered if her palms were bleeding from her short nails digging into the flesh. "I have a task for you." Papers rustled as he stacked more on top of the precariously leaning stack before him. "Go to the mirrored room."

"What am I to do in the mirrored room?" She never raised her head. Her voice was audible, but muffled, and she sounded on the verge of tears. It grated against every nerve within her to be overwhelmed and frightened by herself. She'd spent so long with emotion repressed inside of her that she had no way to deal with, or understand, this foreign aspect of human nature. It was only recognizable as pain. The thought of something even vaguely resembling an order gave a strange, cold sort of comfort to her. There was familiarity in being told what to do.

"Think." He watched her stiffen as her head slowly raised up again, confusion all over her face. The slight relaxation she'd exhibited only a moment before had disappeared swiftly, as if he'd imagined it.

"What am I to think about?"

"Whatever comes to mind."

"Wakaremashita," she said in a low, dark tone as she stood again and bowed quickly. Without another word, she turned on her heel and stalked out of the room, stopping in front of the door to the mirrored room. The wooden surface seemed to mock her, and already she could feel her own eyes staring back at her from all those silvered surfaces. Already, she could hear her own voice in her head, taunting her with memories of her failures, and the odd emotional responses she'd had of late. This room was the last place she wanted to be.

Kankurou stepped away from the wall and dragged a chair over in front of Gaara's desk, easing into it with a sigh. His head turned a moment later at a loud slam that must've been the door to the mirrored room closing. "I used to think you were smart, but now I wonder. You did that all wrong, Gaara." He shook his head slowly, not even trying to hide the frown that creased his face.

"What would you know about it?" Gaara's brow raised questioningly even as his eyes narrowed slightly. "Just how long were you standing there, anyway?" It was as close as he would come to admitting that he hadn't noticed his brother's arrival. Hitori wasn't the only one dealing with confusion.

Kankurou sighed again. "Long enough to know you just made a stupid mistake. What the hell were you thinking?" His mind flashed back to the scene he'd witnessed only the day before: the slow sweep of the butterfly's wings over clasped hands, the locked gazes, the nearly visible confusion in the air. And yet, they'd seemed so close in those few moments. It had all turned upside down, now. "You're making this harder than it has to be. For both of you."

Gaara chose to ignore the implications of his brother's words, instead answering Kankurou's question with one of his own. "What was my mistake?"

"You really don't see it?" A short laugh came from the older man, his eyes closing almost in frustration. "She's just like you were. Created to be a weapon, and nothing else. Only now, she has no master. Destructive, angry, out of control... and you sent her into a room that terrifies her. A room full of glass." He put his hands on the desk and leaned closer. "What do you think is going to happen?"

Turquoise eyes widened slightly just a moment before the first shattering crash reached their ears. They both leapt up, but Kankurou reached the doorway first, his face concerned as he sprinted down the hall.

Hitori ignored the glass flying around her as she slammed her foot into yet another mirror. Rents and rips in her clothes showed flashes of torn, bloodied flesh. Some were deeper than others. The mocking voice in her head only got louder as she drew her weapon from her back, reversed it in her hand, and crashed the bottom of the hilt into yet another wall of glass. A large, jagged piece sliced across her cheek, but she didn't even feel it. If anything, the pain was welcome.

Kankurou darted into the room and froze, just in time to watch the mirror explode in front of the Anbu. He raised an arm to shield himself from the flying glass, and while his view was blocked, the last mirror was shattered. He waited for the sound of the falling shards but it never came, and he risked peeking over his arm. Hitori was held fast by sand, pinned against a now blank wall. Her head hung down as her weapon dropped from nerveless fingers. He backed away slowly as Gaara advanced towards her, the sand releasing her once he was close. Exhausted and bloody, she collapsed against the redhead, his arms closing around her, holding her up.

"I had no idea you would react so violently to my suggestion," he said softly, ignoring the blood that stained through her clothes into his. Hitori stiffened, pulling herself away from him and standing unsteadily, still refusing to meet his eyes. "Come with me...?" The tone of his voice made the statement a request rather than an order, and she silently allowed his arm to settle around her waist as he led her from the room.

Left alone in the destroyed room, Kankurou argued with himself about whether or not to follow. Leaving those two alone was like tossing a match onto oil - bound to go up in a blazing inferno - and yet he was loathe to disturb them. What was happening between them was something they had to deal with on their own. As he slowly walked back to the office, he caught himself wondering if either of them had any idea at all what they were really feeling.

Gaara led her straight into the shower, turning on the cold water before standing her beneath it. She gasped slightly when it hit her, then finally looked up at him. "I think you need to cool off, hmm?" He turned to walk away, the image of her pained eyes lingering in his mind, when a soft sound made him turn back. For a moment, he didn't see anything wrong.

Hitori felt unconsciousness threatening the moment he started walking away, and fought against it. The cold water felt good, but it was doing little to keep her on her feet. Her hand met the tiled wall behind her just a moment before her eyes finally closed, her knees buckling beneath her.

He stepped forward and caught her, the water soaking through his clothes and plastering his unruly hair down against his face. "Why do you do this to yourself?" he nearly whispered, and she mumbled something, but he couldn't hear or understand what it was. "Hitori..."

Her eyes blinked open slowly, taking a long moment to focus on him before her hands rose to push weakly at his chest. "Let me go." She trembled against him, all those confusing feelings flooding through her again, unable to ignore the warmth where their bodies met, or how it felt to be held so tightly.

"If I let you go, you'll fall." Keeping his right arm around her, he reached out with his left and turned the water off, backing them out of the shower and into the bedroom. That torn mask was bothering him. Blood still trickled slowly from the cut beneath it as he raised his hand. The fabric parted easily at his touch and fell away from her face, the tips of his fingers still resting just against her skin. Her head raised, and wide, almost terrified green eyes met his. "Who are you hiding from? The world... or just yourself?"

She started to answer, then stopped, her eyes closing as a pained expression crossed her face. It burned almost like fire where he touched her skin. The right words wouldn't come, no matter how hard she tried to force anything out. She didn't know how to answer his question, anyway. Every wall she'd built around herself was crumbling to dust, because of him. A long moment of silence enveloped them before she found her voice again.

"Does it always hurt to feel?" He could see unshed tears shimmering in her eyes, making the green even paler. Her lower lip trembled slightly as he rested his hand gently against her neck. Without thinking, he leaned forward, his lips just brushing against hers, the barest whisper of contact.

"Gaara, I... Oh!" Kankurou stepped back slowly, jet eyes wide with surprise. "I'll wait for you outside." He didn't meet his brother's gaze as Gaara's head turned towards him, deciding instead to get out of the room as quickly as possible.

"You should rest now." His deep voice was soft. Hitori felt her face flushing lightly as Gaara stepped away from her, turning slightly to the side. "And to answer your question... not always."

He was gone before she could even think of replying. As if in a daze, she somehow got herself out of her torn, wet clothes and into dry ones before settling onto the bed. Even through the confusing tangle of her thoughts, she realized he'd actually answered her question twice. The moment her eyes closed, she felt his lips brushing against hers again.

It felt like butterfly wings.

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End of Chapter Ten! Thank you for reading!


	12. Butterflyキャッチャー Butterfly Catcher

Author's Note: Thank you for all of the views! We really appreciate them. Thanks for reading! We hope you're all doing well.

Our amazing friend, Fumiko, who is a brilliant manga artist, has been gracious enought to work with us. We have a preview of a sketch she did for this story that shows, in order: Kakashi, Nisei, Kouki, Yomi, Hitori, and Gaara.

There's a link posted on the Author's page.

We'll post another link once it's colored. ^_~

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Moon's Light, Reality's Dream  
月の光、うつつの夢  
Chapter Eleven - Butterflyキャッチャー (_Butterfly Catcher_)

羽無き蝶　落ちるImageを

_The image of a falling butterfly without wings_

現実の孤独は耐え難い

_The solitude of reality is unbearable  
_

Hitori stared at the closed door to the Kazekage's office, shifting nervously from foot to foot. She knew she should go in, but she wasn't sure she was ready to face him yet. Her thoughts went in troubling directions every time she remembered the events of the previous day. As she reached hesitantly to open the door, her hand trembled a little.

"Ne, Inu-face! I've been looking for you." Kankurou bounded up beside her and wrapped a hand around her arm. "Come on." He started dragging her off before she could order her thoughts enough to even attempt a protest.

"Where are we going?" Her eyes widened, and then narrowed to slits, as they stepped out into the bright sunlight. He stopped once they were just outside the door.

"I've got a mission and I thought you might want to tag along...?" Without giving her a chance to respond, his grip tightened a little on her arm and he started running, heading straight for the open desert.

'Why not?' Hitori thought, as she increased her pace to keep from being dragged. 'It's not like I have anything better to do.' She felt an odd sense of relief mixed with disappointment at the thought of not having to deal with Gaara for awhile. It was all such a confusing mess in her mind, she wondered how she'd ever be able to make sense of it.

Gaara looked out of the window of his office with one arm draped across his body, the opposite elbow resting on it, and his hand curled against his cheek, one finger touching his temple. The expression on his face was completely unreadable as he watched his brother and the Anbu shrinking into the distant sand. When he could no longer distinguish their figures through the shimmering heat haze, he returned to his desk and leaned back in the chair with a sigh.

He'd kissed her - without warning, without even thinking about it. It just seemed the right thing to do, at the time. Maybe it wasn't much of a kiss, but that instant of contact loomed large in his thoughts. Part of him resented his brother's intrusions, both yesterday and today, while another part felt a small amount of relief. He hadn't been given a chance to gauge her reaction, other than surprise. The last thing he wanted to do was add to her confusion or frighten her even more, especially now that he was so sure what he wanted.

Certainly Kankurou was only trying to help, since it was obvious he cared for the girl in his own way, but Gaara felt that keeping Hitori away would just make things harder. The only way she was going to learn to deal with her emotions was to face them, to face him. His fingers rested lightly against his lower lip as his eyes slowly closed, and he idly wondered what sort of premise Kankurou had used to lure the Anbu out of the Kazekage building.

After several hours of following Kankurou aimlessly through the sand, the idea that they were only going in circles started to bloom in Hitori's mind. When they came across an outcropping of large rocks, she stopped and waited for him to notice that she was no longer following, her arms folded over her chest as she sat on one of the boulders.

Kankurou turned and raised an eyebrow at her. "We aren't going to get anywhere if you're just going to sit there."

"Where, exactly, is 'there,' kabuki boy?" she asked calmly, her eyes staying locked to his face, looking for any sign of deception.

"One of the smaller villages on the border has sent a report of having some trouble with a band of rogue ninja." His words came too fast, and she noticed his face turning a light shade of pink before he turned away to glance at the horizon. "I decided we should go check it out."

"Really? Because it seems to me that we're only going in circles." She rose to her feet, her arms falling to hang at her sides again as she slowly advanced towards him. "Would you like to tell me the real reason we've been running uselessly through the same few miles of desert?"

With a heavy sigh, Kankurou eased himself down onto a rock. "I guess I figured you could maybe use a little time away, and this seemed like the easiest way to do it." His black eyes finally raised to meet her stony green gaze. "The last couple of days have been... crazy."

Hitori settled onto a smaller rock beside him and drew her knees up to her chest, resting her chin on them as she wrapped her arms around her legs. Kankurou had seen them yesterday, she remembered. At the time, she'd been too overwhelmed by her thoughts and feelings to really pay much attention. "Are you my guardian, now?" The amount of scorn she put into the phrase surprised even her.

"No," he answered simply, turning away to stare uncomfortably at the sand under his feet. "But I am lousy at talking about this sort of thing."

"What sort of thing?" Her eyes narrowed as she watched him, her face staying calm, but inside her heart was beating frantically and her mind threatened to bury her beneath a mountain of questions. She wasn't entirely sure she wanted answers to most of those questions.

He turned to look at her, his eyes almost searching hers for a long moment before he answered. "I'm talking about the bond forming between you and my brother." The wind picked up for a moment, slinging sand around and forcing them to raise their scarves over their faces.

Hitori was thankful for the forced silence, unsure of how to respond to Kankurou's words. If anyone knew Gaara at all, it was his brother. The questions he was leading her to all had answers that sent terror jolting through her entire body once more. These feelings were for other people, not her. Before this mess, the path of her life had been clear and comforting in her mind. She would live and die as an Anbu Root - no more, no less. Everything had twisted and obscured the moment she first laid eyes on Sabaku no Gaara.

"The Kazekage..." she started, but Kankurou turned to her suddenly and grabbed her hard by the shoulders, an odd expression on his face.

"Say his name." He leaned close to her, an intense look in his eyes as he stared straight into hers. "Calling him by his title is safe, right? It objectifies him and doesn't provoke an emotional response. I want to hear you say his name." His hands tightened before he shook her just a little. "I don't think you can."

It felt like the breath had been driven from her body. Anger flooded through her as she shrugged off his hands and stood, turning towards Sunagakure. "I'm going back."

Kankurou stayed where he was, watching her slowly walking away before he stood and stretched. "You'll just have to face him once you're there. If you don't go looking for him, he'll come to you. It's inevitable." He yawned a little, then began walking leisurely after her.

She didn't bother to reply, or even look to see if he was following, focusing instead on putting one foot in front of the other, on getting back. Thinking about what would happen when she got there could wait. Her speed increased as she tried to fight off the confusion. A memory of Yomi took it's place, and she sank into it gratefully.

'Aaah, Hitori chan. Love is a beautiful thing.'

Yomi practically fluttered into the room, falling dramatically onto his bed and heaving a happy sigh, his hands clenched together over his chest. He turned dreamy brown eyes towards her, unable to stop the ridiculously large smile that was plastered all over his face. Hitori knew she was in for the latest chapter of Yomi's insane personal life. Every other week he was 'falling in love' with some new girl. The whole idea of love, at least what she heard of it through Yomi's ramblings, seemed ludicrous to her.

"I met her in the tea house we stopped at after the last mission. Do you remember? That beautiful, tiny little thing with light brown hair?" He sighed again, his eyes closing as his smile got even bigger. "Her name is Kazumi. It fits her, don't you think?"

He knew she wouldn't answer him, as a matter of fact, she was barely looking at him, but he continued on and on, cheerfully listing every amazing characteristic of his new love. Hitori was the perfect partner and room mate. Her fighting abilities were unparalleled and she never interrupted his tedious diatribes. What more could a man ask for?

Hitori turned to him when he finally paused for longer than it took to draw in breath. "Yomi san, is love such a small thing?"

Surprise wiped the smile off of his face, and he sat up slowly, regarding her with a serious look in his eyes. "Love is a very complicated thing." He idly scratched his head, trying to decide how to explain something like this to his naive partner. "I suppose I sometimes use the word 'love' rather lightly. It's easy to get caught up in the happiness from meeting and spending time with someone who is special to you." She nodded slowly, and he wondered if she really thought she understood. "I haven't found the right person yet, but I am always hopeful that I will." He watched her carefully, while pretending not to, as he continued on. "Someday, you will, too."

Hitori's jade eyes opened wide for a long moment, before she shook her head. "That's not part of my future." Laying back on her bed, she folded her arms beneath her head and let her eyes close, deciding the conversation was over. She would ponder his curious ways until sleep claimed her, as she always did when Yomi rambled about something.

"I wouldn't be so sure of that, Hitori chan. Love has a strange way of finding you, even if you're not looking for it." Yomi leaned back and picked up the book from his bedside table. He held it open in front of his face, but he didn't even really see the pages. Her words made him sad. A life without love seemed a bleak existence to him. At that moment he decided he would do everything he could to draw her out of the unfeeling, lifeless state Danzou had thrust her into. She deserved a better future than that.

When Yomi stopped speaking, Hitori turned to glance at him. It was unusual for her verbose partner to be silent if they weren't out on a mission. He even talked in his sleep. The book in front of his face had a brilliant picture of a butterfly drawn on it's cover, crimson and purple wings spread wide...

Remembering the book cover snapped her fully back to reality a few hundred feet from the door to the Kazekage tower. Her eyes were raised slowly to the window of Gaara's office, almost as if her gaze was being pulled. The shadowy outline of a body disappeared just a moment after she focused on it. It was too far away to see who it actually was, but only one person would be looking out of that window at this time of day.

Was he angry with her, she wondered, as she forced herself to cross the remaining distance. The memory of Yomi's words had taken on a haunting quality in her mind, repeating as she climbed the stairs in the semi-darkness. She wasn't afraid, but her heart was beating as if trying to force it's way out of her chest. The door loomed before her all too soon, seeming to take on an almost menacing air, forcing her to stop. Hitori leaned back against the opposite wall, trying to order her thoughts before going in, but she wasn't given the chance.

Gaara stood in the doorway, watching her silently. He found it a little odd that she'd returned without Kankurou, but was loathe to ask her for a reason. If he hadn't been at the window when they left, he would never have known she'd departed in the first place, unless he'd gone looking for her.

"You're late. I expected you several hours ago." He sighed softly, his tone carrying just a shred of disappointment. She stiffened against the wall, but kept her eyes on the floor. A few small steps brought him close to her, barely a hand's width away. The dark smell of the desert clung to her, mixed with the fragrance of the small flowers that grew in the nearby oasis. Somehow, it suited her perfectly.

"It won't happen again." Her head raised slowly to meet his eyes. "I am sorry... Gaara san."

He stared at her, managing to keep his face somewhat blank, but caught off guard by her words. She'd always addressed him by his title before, and it made him wonder exactly what Kankurou said to her. He settled a hand softly on her waist as he moved to the side. "Come into the office. It's past time to eat and... you have a visitor."

She flushed lightly at the contact, her eyes lowering before his words actually registered. Who would be visiting her in Sunagakure? Glancing back up at him questioningly, she let him lead her to the doorway. He moved a little closer to her, and she couldn't stop herself from remembering how it felt to be in his arms. Her feet stopped as she turned towards him, forgetting about the mysterious visitor as their eyes met again.

"Well, isn't this cozy?"

Startled, she nearly jumped as her head snapped to the side to see Yomi leaning against Gaara's desk, one hand on the dark wooden surface behind him, propping him up. He grinned at her, showing all of his teeth, and he even waved a little before his face grew serious.

"We need to talk, Hitori chan."

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Everything felt like it was out of order. Nisei couldn't pin down any particular oddity, but the feeling sat there in the back of her mind like a thunder cloud. She found herself spending more time at Kakashi's house than she did at her own. Her mind rationalized it as needing to do something about his lazy, obnoxious way of living. He would never get better in these conditions. The large amount of food stocked in the fridge and on the shelves would hopefully leave the desired impression: that it feels good to have food within easy reach. Maybe he would keep up with the routine of buying things, but it was highly unlikely to happen while he was ill. Until he was well again, she'd take care of the things he needed without being asked.

The last time she walked into his room had been a nerve wracking experience, so this time she was cautious and waited until he went to shower. Kakashi left his sanctuary a mess, and with the windows always closed, she didn't question why the apartment was constantly stuffy. The second phase of helping Kakashi was to clean. He didn't see much of her previous progress through his clutter, as he rarely left this room, and didn't know about any of the cleaning. She didn't want to risk him stopping her. It was good that he took indecently long showers. Determined to finish before he emerged, she started to pick up his books. Bookcases were a border around the four walls of his room. Shelf by shelf she filled up the space with the scattered tomes.

"That's odd…"

She tapped a finger in the space where there should have been another volume of 'Echi Echi Paradise' then turned to look around the room. Without all those books on the floor, it looked spotless. Her eyes fell on the bed, the only hiding spot available. She removed the sheets and put them in the basket beside her. No sign of the book. The more she looked and found nothing, the more she suspicious she became. Perhaps Kakashi was capable of trickery. A worried frown creased her face. Outsmarting him might prove difficult, and simply demanding he give her the book would get her nothing at all, except maybe an argument.

Not that Kakashi ever argued.

It was possible, she supposed, that he really didn't have the book. She remade the bed with the new sheets, trying not to think about the way she'd last seen him laying here, and tied the old ones in a bag to take out to be washed. The Jonin had no real possessions. Three photos sat in frames on his bedside table: one of his recent team, one of his team as a child, and one of the old Anbu force. Nisei paused as she lifted the last photo and glanced over it. The crowd of emotionless, grim faces nearly made her laugh. They all took themselves so seriously. She remembered that day clearly. For the picture she'd made a point of remaining next to Kouki, afraid of being near her newly assigned sensei.

He had the same lazy expression as always on his face, with his Anbu mask to the side. She'd kept hers in her hands, so nervous she couldn't find a comfortable position to stand in. Then the camera flashed and she was permanently captured with her eyes drifting towards Kakashi. She set the picture back down and glared at nothing in particular. Of course she'd been looking at him, and of course he had the monumental proof of it, though she was sure he'd never noticed.

Biting her lip, she absently wondered if he ever had noticed, turning when the door to the bathroom abruptly opened. A towel covered half of the top of his head and half of his neck when he looked up from the floor. She was thankful that this time he was wearing a shirt, since she'd prefer to not repeat the awkward moments from when he was sleeping - her, gawking like an idiot. He should be able to lay there without clothing on, sick in his bed. She really didn't have the right to say anything about it, not that he would listen anyway. It was his apartment.

He glanced around, taking in the work she'd done in the bedroom. "What possessed you to clean a man's room?" It was a relief that he didn't sound angry or irritated, just slightly curious. The fact that she was relieved annoyed her more than a little.

"More like a man's entire apartment," Nisei laughed while tucking a few loose strands of her black hair behind her ear, looking away nervously. "I was bored and decided to reorganize. I didn't fail to notice that a book is missing." Her eyebrow raised as her golden eyes roamed the room. "Would you happen to know where it could be?"

He slowly shook his head at her, sliding the towel from his shoulders. A definite smirk set on his face, which he didn't even bother trying to hide, said otherwise. The look in those lazy eyes was turning into something different, something that she couldn't place, since she was seeing it for the first time. He answered in a slightly bored tone. "Not that I can recall."

"So the odd shape of the back pocket of those pants you're wearing…" She stood up straight, eyeing the book shaped outline, which was drawing her eyes like a bulls eye. "…is totally unrelated?"

"Hai."

The friendly eye-crease didn't fool her, and she practically lunged for the book. Just as her hand closed over his pocket, he caught her wrist, the action consequentially pulling her forcefully against him. His chest felt warm, the heat of his skin from the shower penetrating through the light fabric of his shirt, and hers. He even smelled comfortable, like clean laundry and soap. Then reality rudely snapped her back into place. She was still grabbing his backside firmly, what with his hand holding her wrist so tightly, keeping her from removing it. Her face colored a light red as she brought her free hand up and closed it around the arm that was pinning her in place.

"Give me the book! You can't read in your condition. It worsens the vertigo. Don't you care?" His response was to let her go, which sent her flailing backwards, completely off balance. Her body bounced once on the bed, and she looked up in surprise to see him hovering over her. His grin grew wider beneath the material of his mask, quickly turning her into a flustered mess. It was a side of Nisei he'd seen many times before, and one he was frankly starting to enjoy.

"I'm afraid that's asking a bit much, Nisei-chan, so I will respectfully decline your request." She leaned up on her elbows, about to lecture him again when his hand pressed against her just above her chest, forcing her gently back down. His voice grew softer, "I'm not quite finished yet. There is something I've been meaning to speak with you about, but I've kept silent, knowing you'll run from the topic." His expression had grown quietly serious and thoughtful. "The time to discuss it has come."

She only grew more impatient and angry under his touch. Her heart was beating frantically, and in her flustered condition it didn't take much to hold her down. The way he was treating her was humiliating. After several long moments of silence, and finally accepting that she wouldn't be able to escape this, she calmed herself, settling down on the bed. With a hum of approval, he gently straddled her waist, making certain that she couldn't move before he continued. Her eyes closed as his added weight caused her to sink lower in the bed.

"Maa…" He leaned up straight, tangling the fingers of one hand in his wet hair, and smiling at her sheepishly. "That kiss the other night... I figured that we should get to the bottom of its intentions."

"That was your doing not mine, and I don't care! Get off of me." His eyes narrowed, realizing that she was still going to be difficult, and would continue to act like a child. It looked like he had no choice left. As the Jonin leaned in close to his former student, he watched her eyes fall shut again at the sudden shift in distance. He wondered if she was bracing herself for another kiss, and unthinkingly asked, "Did you want me to kiss you again?"

The words brushed over her face in a soft breath, he was so close to her now, and his low tone sent a shiver through her. Nisei tensed visibly, her eyes unwillingly forced open by his question, her heart and mind conflicting violently within her while she answered. "No! Of course not..."

"Are you afraid of me?" She couldn't escape the serious look in his eyes, or the overwhelming effect of his nearness, as he held her there. Maybe she was afraid of Kakashi. Maybe she'd always been afraid of him. That wasn't going to change now, not with him looking at her that way. Since when did Kakashi look at her at all? Nisei could easily become consumed by this man, in a way that her heart had been longing for and was more than ready to allow, but her mind remained frozen by the idea of something it had fought so hard against.

"No…" With a trembling breath, she broke the connection they shared, turning her head to the side, and closing her golden eyes. Not looking at him was safer. She knew just how easy it would be to lose herself in this man. His gaze narrowed, knowing what she felt, what she wanted from him, and yet confused as to why she wouldn't reach out for it. He decided that he would force the matter by leaving her no choice. Kouki's game of possession didn't help things any, it only served to complicate the feelings Kakashi had for Nisei.

Either way, things couldn't continue as they were now.

"I kissed you because I wanted to…I still want to…Maybe more than before." He rested his hand along the side of her face, holding it gently, but firmly. He wasn't in the mood for the usual argumentative banter, and she wouldn't find it so easy to escape this time. His other hand reached up slowly to draw down his mask, his fingers lingering for a long moment against the fabric before pulling it away. "If you want to continue, if you want more, Nisei, you have to take that first step, too. Kiss me back this time, if you really want me." It was all the warning he intended to give her, leaning closer before the words had finished leaving his mouth.

The moment his lips brushed hers, she felt something inside of her tense. Fear tingled throughout her body, a gasp parted her lips, and she arched involuntarily against him, her body forcing his up and away. He'd known that there was a chance she would react this way, and let her go, certain that she would now run as fast and as far from him as she could.

Her fleeing footsteps echoed hollowly through his living room before the door loudly punctuated her exit. Exasperated, he reached into his pocket and retrieved the book he had been concealing, staring at it before tossing it aside. Perhaps it really was too late, after all. The thought made him shake his head. If he'd learned anything from his past, it was that some things are worth fighting for, no matter how long and difficult the battle might become.

'What the hell was that?' Nisei asked herself, her strides swallowing the ground beneath her as she ran like hell itself was at her heels. 'How could he say things like that so casually, as if he knew...' She stopped herself at the door to her apartment, unlocking it with a shaking hand. 'Kakashi confessing he likes me all of a sudden, and that I should act on it? No… Kiss him if I want him?' She slammed the door behind her and cursed loudly the entire way to the kitchen. 'It's as if he knew what I said…'

The Anbu captain switched on the light and turned towards her chair. There, resting innocently on the table as if it was exactly where it belonged, was the dirty porcelain mask - Kakashi's mask. She picked it up, holding it carefully against her chest. He'd come looking for her yesterday. She tensed when the realization hit her. 'So, he must've stopped by here, left this in my apartment, and then went to the Anbu quarters'. Her eyes closed, and she felt the onset of the first headache she'd had in a long while. What was he trying to do to her, now? Even if Nisei thought she wanted him, she couldn't trust her feelings where he was concerned, or his motives, for that matter. She sighed softly, knowing that Kakashi's strange new game would end soon, anyway. He couldn't force her to play for much longer.

Tonight was the last night he had to take his medicine.

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End of Chapter. See you again soon.


	13. 線の上で On the Line

**Author's Note: **Thank you for all of the views, favorites, alerts, reviews, patience, and understanding. The story's plot is about to thick here, so please bear with us!

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Moon's Light, Reality's Dream  
月の光、うつつの夢  
Chapter Twelve - 線の上で (_On the Line_)

千羽のとても小さな  
_ Thousands of small birds  
_ あなたの願いに寄り添って  
_Get you closer to your wish_

[**1**. A thousand birds in Japanese stands for a thousand paper cranes. If you fold one thousand paper cranes, you are able to grant one wish.]

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Nisei didn't have to see him. No one could force her to look at him. Kakashi was now perfectly able to function without her help. He was obviously feeling better, and he proved it by walking around his apartment, doing whatever he felt like, even reading. She didn't have to administer the last dose of his medicine, and she felt pretty confident in her ability to avoid him for awhile. She had plenty of things to do with her uneventful life. Like being called to the Hokage's office, which was always a treat. The blond behind that imposing desk never failed to have something interesting to say, though lately the outcome of such a visit ended up being bad, or worse.

"Nisei," Tsunade glanced up from the paper in front of her. The details listed were fewer than she'd hoped for, and even less than she'd expected. It was hard to keep up with the wily old geezer who seemed to love ruining everything. Danzou had many puppets, many strings to control them, and many games to play. The woman searched her Anbu for the usual look of resolution, anything that said that Nisei was okay, but in fact, she looked horrible. The girl's pale complexion and tired eyes told Tsunade just how exhausted she really was.

"You wanted to speak with me, Lady Hokage?" Gold met topaz as they stared at each other. Tsunade's expressions were always intense, especially when she had been awake thinking all night of possible reasons as to why an Anbu root would suddenly go rogue and let everyone be aware of it. Something about this situation wasn't adding up, and she smelled the stench of Danzou's dirty work all over it.

"I did." The woman folded her hands together and spoke from behind them. "Hitori from Root... What do you know about her?"

"She was typical Root. Emotionless…" Nisei paused as Hitori's face flashed through the back of her mind. No, there had been something different about Hitori, something that she couldn't conceal that day. She was definitely of the elite kind, but there was something about the Kazekage, aside from the fact that he had been dead, that seemed to make her gain an emotion that day, even if it was merely borrowed for the occasion.

Nisei continued once the image had faded into obscurity. "She didn't say much, but she was unconscious for most of what happened. The Akatsuki member I told you about, Zetsu, his attack caused brief psychological trauma. She had been conscious, yet unresponsive before falling under again. Whatever he did, it must've been awful."

Tsunade nodded shortly, giving herself a moment to digest all of the information as a whole – what little information she had. "There's an Anbu in Root who has decided to turn rogue. Another one of Danzou's mutts, but this one's objective is still unclear. However, I have a theory."

Nisei walked further into the room and took a seat in front of Tsunade's desk. If the Hokage had a theory, and planned on sharing it, the Anbu captain wasn't about to pass up such a rare opportunity. There was something brewing and she would get to be at the center of it. The best part of the entire thing was that she'd be away, and too busy to think about Kakashi. With the excuse of a mission, she wouldn't have to face him. It was fortuitous, something of a saving grace. Nisei wondered what Tsunade's theory would lead the Hokage to asking of her now.

A picture was tossed carelessly across the desk, sliding to a stop just in front of her. "His name is Yomi. He and Hitori have been operative partners for over a year, up until now. After the rogue went missing, Yomi was spotted leaving." Tsunade gave Nisei a meaningful look before continuing on. "Reports coming in from scouts say he was heading for Suna. He might already be there. He betrayed Danzou by leaving his post suddenly." She leaned in, her eyebrows creasing. "Why? What would cause him to leave with such haste…?"

"So, I get to play a game of 'Find the Rogue'?" Nisei asked, perching on the edge of her chair with excitement. Tsunade's words, her resolve, and her very law – all she had to do was give the order.

"I was going to send you, but now I'm not so sure that's the wisest course. I think I can find a team more suitable." Nisei's mind reeled in shock as soon as Tsunade started to waver, and she rose quickly to her feet. Her eyes darted around, and she felt unsure of what she was doing, but disagreement between them always seemed to lead to this.

"You cannot send a team of Chuunin and a single Jonin to fight an Anbu Root." Before she'd thought too much about it, Nisei became the one barking orders. "Look, I'm ready. I want this mission, and frankly, I am the best operative you have available right now. You know I am more than capable of finding this guy and dealing with him if the mission requires it."

Tsunade pinched the bridge of her nose, too exhausted to be patronizing or even bother to argue with the girl. Her eyes met Nisei's in a glare. That special something she rarely saw in people was starting to pulsate brightly from the girl in front of her. What was it that drove Nisei to continue to move? It was something more than the proverbial 'life', an idea that was thrown around so casually, like a goddamn pain that would one day be a delivered promise. Tsunade sat up straight in her chair again.

Nisei watched expectantly, nearly sighing in relief when the blonde threw another picture across the dark wood, the one she had been holding between her fingers. "This is Enji Aizawa, also known as Hitori."

She lifted the photo from the table and looked at it. Hitori had been only a small girl when this was taken. She'd still had light in her eyes. Tsunade's soft voice broke Nisei abruptly from her thoughts. "She was left to die, when she was a young girl, by a couple of hell bent rogue ninja sweeping over Sunagakure. Her parents had already been dead for hours when Danzou found her and decided to make her his prodigy. She's a weapon, and that alone threatens him." The Hokage rubbed at her temples, as if experiencing the onset of a headache. "Orders came in specifically from the Kazekage that Hitori was to stay in Suna. It was most definitely not a request. And since she was being of service to Sunagakure, Danzou couldn't object to it. So, what does he do?"

Nisei nodded, following the woman's train of thought perfectly. "He plans an assassination."

She fired her fingers like a gun at the Anbu. "Bingo."

"Tsunade-sama." Shizune entered the room in the same frantic manner she always did, and handed a folder in clumsy secrecy to Tsunade. A worried glance passed between the blond and Nisei. "Here are the papers you requested."

"Very good," Tsunade beamed proudly at her assistant as she flipped open the folder and tossed another photo. "This is the man who is going after Hitori. His name is Ruka. He is an elite captain and he has also been squad leader to both Hitori and Yomi on occasion."

"It's…" Nisei trailed off uncomfortably, twitching slightly at the completely twisted methods Danzou employed.

"Personal." Tsunade nodded slowly, her eyes narrowing in a serious manner. "What if Kakashi suddenly turned on you and Yamato? That would be quite dangerous, right? He would know every move you make, every technique, every limit, and what hurts you the most."

Nisei wanted to laugh a little at the thought of Yamato being hunted down by his beloved ex-squad leader. Just the idea of anything like that happening was ludicrous. The proper pairing Tsunade should have listed was Nisei and Kouki. She grimaced as the thought occurred to her. It was awkward to be Nisei and Kouki anything, now.

"What are my orders?"

"I just want you to track him. Avoid battle at all costs. He has not yet made a move towards Suna, but I'm sure that's where he's headed. He'll wait for the opportune moment. We won't let him have it. Report back to me as soon as possible."

"Hai, Lady Hokage."

_Kakashi,_

_The bottle on the table, as you'll be relieved to find, only has two pills left. I don't believe that you'll need my help to take them. I have been called out on a mission. During this time, try to keep your house filled with cool air and fresh food. Also, keep it clean. Thank you for the present, though I fail to see why you've chosen to leave it with me. I will continue to feel complimented, from teacher, to student. I'm sorry that in the end, I really couldn't face up to anything. I have a habit of stopping myself from doing the things that I'm afraid of. I've disappointed you, right? To finally have you is all but a wish. Maybe Kouki was right about a lot of the things he said to me. Maybe it's impossible with our lives, to love. Either way, I will take this time to think and understand myself, and I will undoubtedly come back with an answer._

_- Nisei_

Barely an hour after writing the letter to Kakashi, Nisei was already running through Konoha forest, nimbly avoiding collisions with small twigs and branches. She wasn't sure what possessed her to write it in the first place, but she'd felt she had to, in some form or another, offer a response. If anything unexpected should happen, she wanted there to be some sort of resolution to their past.

Tracking was an easy task for her, but harder when her target was an elite Anbu. If she failed to be careful, he would certainly pick up on her, and probably prepare an ambush. She was sure that this 'Ruka' would expect a immediate response from Konoha. If he was expecting only a single operative, then she would be surprised.

_Nisei was the card Tsunade played on the brink of a stalemate - Trump card. _

--------

Hitori paled, one hand raising to rest against her chest as she stared at Yomi in disbelief. It was hard enough to accept that Danzou had basically given her away, but to classify her as a rogue and issue an assassination order? Such a thing was beyond her comprehension. Danzou's choice of Ruka as the mission operative was the only part that made sense to her. He was probably the sole member of the Anbu elite who stood a chance of defeating her. She stopped, forcing her mind to be honest with her. Ruka had a very good chance of success. Having been her team leader on more than one mission, and also a few one on one training sessions, he was very well aware of her abilities, and would know how to counter them.

Yomi watched her changing expression as she contemplated everything he'd said, then narrowed his eyes at the other two people present in the room: Gaara and Kankurou. The latter had come in at some point about halfway through Yomi's long winded warning, and tried to interject a comment, but was halted by Gaara raising a hand for silence. The diminutive Anbu wasn't sure he liked the puppet user much, based on first impressions. He seemed a little too hotheaded. The Kazekage came across as downright cold by comparison. What puzzled him now, was Hitori herself.

"Yomi, why did you come here?" Hitori's voice wavered slightly in spite of her efforts to keep it even.

"Have you heard a word I said?" For a moment, he couldn't help but wonder if this strange situation she'd fallen into had addled her mind. It was an entirely foolish question, and the answer should be obvious enough.

The Anbu shook her head slowly as she took a small step away from him, unconsciously moving closer to Gaara, who was standing silently behind her with his arms crossed over his chest, watching everything. "That's not what I meant. I know you deserted to come here." Her eyes met his, a pained expression crossing her face. "Now you can't go back."

"Oh, that." Yomi waved a hand dismissively and laughed a little before continuing on. "There's really nothing for me to go back to, anyway. I've been thinking about leaving Root for awhile now."

Kankurou stepped forward, his mouth open as if he intended to say something, but was stopped again, this time by a look from Gaara. Frustration colored his face as he leaned back against the wall, muttering and glaring at Yomi. The little runt was really starting to get on his nerves.

Hitori turned away and sank slowly into a chair, becoming more and more irritated with her own mind. Emotions were clouding her thoughts, slowing them down, and leaving everything lost in a fog of confusion. Frowning, Gaara stepped towards her, then stopped and turned to Yomi. "Do you have proof of the things you've said? You're the one who beat her at Danzou's order..." His turquoise eyes never left Hitori, who had closed her own eyes the moment he'd started speaking. "How can we really trust you?"

Anger welled up inside Yomi, his face turning slightly red as his hands clenched into fists before him. "How dare you say that to me! This whole mess is your fault! You and your insufferable god complex, or whatever the hell it is... This all happened because of the fucking letters you sent to Danzou and the Hokage."

Gaara's eyes narrowed as they turned back to Yomi again, and Kankurou practically leaped off the wall, moving quickly towards the small Anbu. Hitori rose swiftly and stepped in front of Gaara, glaring a little at her former partner. "That's enough, Yomi."

"I'm surprised, Hitori. Are you trying to protect him?" Yomi scoffed a little, obviously hurt, but trying to hide it. "The Kazekage is a big boy. I'm sure he can take care of himself."

Kankurou wrapped his hands in the front of Yomi's shirt and lifted him up, slamming him none too gently into the wall. "You need to learn how to watch your mouth, Tiny."

Yomi eyed him oddly for a moment, ignoring the fact that he was dangling a good couple of feet off the floor and smashed against a rather uncomfortable wall. He grinned cheerfully, as if this was all perfectly normal. "Let me ask you a question. Do you ever put on a kabuki show with your puppets?"

Wide eyed, Hitori turned towards him, just in time to see Kankurou smashing him into the wall yet again. The two were still bickering back and forth, but their voices had lowered and words were no longer distinguishable. She'd often thought that Yomi's mouth would one day get him into more trouble than he could get himself out of. Hopefully today wasn't that day. A hand closed gently around her arm, and she looked back to Gaara who eyed the door to the rooftop balcony meaningfully.

"It'll be quieter out there. I need to talk to you and..." He looked over her head at his brother and Yomi, his voice clearly audible from anywhere in the room. "I'd rather not be overheard or interrupted this time."

Her cheeks flushed a light pink as she nodded, and Gaara released her arm, gesturing for her to precede him. The wind gusted fitfully around them, tugging almost playfully at their clothes as they ascended the stairs. Once they reached the top, he stared out over Suna, trying to put his thoughts into words. She waited for him silently, her eyes locked onto her hands where she clasped the railing.

As soon as the door closed behind them, Kankurou unceremoniously dropped Yomi on the floor. The smaller man opened his mouth to speak, but all that came out was a startled squeak of outraged pain. Rubbing ruefully at his backside as he regained his feet, he turned towards the door, staring at it thoughtfully.

"What is it with them?" He noticed that Kankurou was looking at him oddly, and decided to drop the stupid act that had served him so well in the past. "If he hurts her in any way, I swear I'll kill him. He could bury me beneath the entire fucking desert, and I'd claw my way out just to kill him."

Kankurou's eyebrows raised a little, and he found himself believing the Anbu meant exactly what he said. He shook his head, eyed the door they'd left through, and then took Yomi's arm, his face matching the seriousness of the other's.

"Can you keep that damned mouth of yours shut for a few minutes?" At Yomi's nod, Kankurou turned for the door. "Be quiet and stay close. I think.. maybe you need to see this." With a sigh, he led the other carefully out towards the balcony.

They found a perch on the stairs, mostly hidden by shadows, where they could both see and hear what was going on above. Yomi opened his mouth to say something, and snapped it shut again immediately, grinning a little at Kankurou's frown, then focusing his attention on the pair near the railing.

Finally satisfied with what he planned to say, Gaara turned towards her. Hitori's eyes raised to meet his and he froze, all the words he'd so carefully chosen fleeing from his thoughts. Instead of speaking, he reached out and pulled her tightly against his chest, his head lowering to rest next to hers. "I won't let anyone hurt you."

He spoke against her ear, and her body both stiffened and shuddered slightly. An awkward moment passed before she realized he wasn't going to let her go. Right on the heels of that realization, she discovered that she didn't want him to. Her own arms rose slowly and closed around him, her hands pressing against his back. Even if she didn't completely understand what she was feeling, maybe it was time for her to try.

Yomi's eyes widened, his mouth opening and closing, making him look like a fish out of water. Kankurou glared at him and raised a finger to his lips, then jerked his chin towards the door, indicating they should make their way back inside. The Anbu pretended not to notice the movement, his eyes drawn back to the scene above. Exasperated, Kankurou grabbed a fistful of the back of Yomi's shirt and started dragging him away.

Gaara's eyes snapped open at the soft pressure of her hands on his back. He'd been waiting for her to pull away from him, or push against him, anything to try to escape. For her to embrace him in return was what he wanted, but hadn't expected. His voice locked in his throat. For a long moment, he was only aware of the warmth of her body, the gentle beating of her heart, and the way she felt in his arms. "Hitori..."

She tilted her head back to look up at him when he spoke her name, her eyes full of questions, but her body unmoving. It felt safe here, comforting and warm, and she refused to let her confused mind take that from her just yet. The future had grown dim with Yomi's warning. She wanted to believe there was light on the other side of the darkness approaching her. "If I turn the game around on him, and become the hunter instead of the prey, I'll have the advantage."

His eyes closed as he shook his head slowly. "No. Going out after him is the worst thing you can do. I want you to stay here, where I know I can keep you safe. "

She blinked in surprise at his words, pulling away from him and stepping back as she narrowed her eyes at him. The weakness she'd felt since being defeated so easily by the Akatsuki member, Zetsu, the insecurities about her own abilities, all came flooding back in a wave that threatened to drown her. "I don't need to be protected!"

"Is there anything I can say that will keep you from doing something so foolish?" He stepped towards her, only to stop when she turned away, his hands clenching into fists at his sides.

"How is it foolish to protect myself?" Her voice raised as she moved further away from him.

"I don't want you to die!" The words were out of his mouth before he thought about them, and he nearly cringed. Could he never say the right thing? "I suppose I can demand your obedience, and order you to stay."

She flushed bright red, turning to glare at him again as her heart constricted painfully in her chest. "You can order me all you like. I don't have to listen." Without waiting for him to reply, she stormed off, wiping angrily at the tears that refused to stop spilling from her eyes. He felt she needed to be protected, that she was too weak to save herself. His words hurt her in a way she'd never dreamed possible.

Gaara looked back out over Suna, his hand tightening around the railing as his eyes slowly closed at the bitter realization that if he lost her now, he'd have no one to blame but himself.

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End of this chapter! How did you like it?


	14. 理論 Theories

Author's Note: Thanks again so much for the hits, reviews, and alerts. It definitely keeps us motivated to continue putting out each chapter as fast as we do. Hope you're all well, and enjoying the story.

Moon's Light, Reality's Dream  
月の光、うつつの夢  
Chapter Thirteen - 理論 (_Theories_)

ふらつく足を摩りあなたを待った  
_ I rubbed my staggering legs, waiting for you_  
雨の音に紛れて聞こえる  
_ It could hardly be heard in the sound of rain  
_

The fabric mask seemed innocuous laying on her bed, but the moment she reached for it, that feeling changed. Hitori stepped away and pulled her dark red hair back into a ponytail. She felt slightly uncomfortable in the clothes she had on. Someone had brought them to her this morning and they looked a lot like something Temari would wear. Glancing down, she decided there was entirely too much ivory skin visible. After the encounter with Yomi in the forest outside of Konoha, and then the disaster in the mirrored room, she didn't have much choice, with only one uniform left. The ragged black outfit lay on the floor and she pushed it aside with her foot. She didn't really have the right to wear an Anbu uniform anymore. Shrugging off those thoughts, she slid her blade into the sheath across her back and quietly left the room. The black mask remained on the bed, forgotten and no longer necessary.

Unhurried steps carried her almost silently up the stairs towards the Kazekage's office. She would check in, but she certainly wasn't going to stay. Today she had better, more important things to do than wait for Gaara to find some random task to set her to. If she wasn't still so angry with him, and hurt - though she was trying to ignore that part, she'd probably feel guilty for creating extra work for him when he already had more than enough.

She heard Yomi long before she saw him, and thanks to the odd acoustics in the building, she wasn't certain if the echo of his unmistakable voice originated before or behind her. It wasn't surprising that he was still here. He couldn't return to Konoha, and somehow he and Kankurou had struck up some odd sort of friendship. At least, she'd seen them with their heads together, grinning like idiots, on more than once occasion since her erstwhile partner's arrival.

"H... Hitori chan?" The small man darted up behind her, then ran around in front of her, effectively halting her progress. She sighed softly as his wide eyes looked her up and down, lingering on the bare skin revealed by her shorts, then her uncovered face as he obviously struggled to speak.

"This is new. I never thought I'd see the day Yomi couldn't find something to say." A small smile managed to form on her face, and this, combined with her mildly teasing manner, only choked him up even more.

"Neee... " he drawled, his usual toothy grin creeping over his face as he fell in beside her. "No one ever told me you're a fox. That inu mask had it all wrong." His head shook and a feigned look of regret crossed his face, though the corners of his mouth twitched up now and then.

"Yomi, don't make me hurt you." Another sigh escaped her, though she felt like she wanted to laugh. His jokes had never really made sense to her before, but she was slowly coming to understand when he was being funny. It was an interesting sensation, and one of the things she actually liked about dealing with this crazy emotional mess.

"Oh, please do." His eyes creased upwards and his grin got even bigger, just a moment before he grabbed her arm and yanked her inside an empty room. Hitori stood there in stunned silence while the small Anbu poked his head out into the hallway, peering first one way, then the other, before softly closing the door with a satisfied sigh. "Good. We can talk in here and aren't likely to be interrupted." Only after speaking did he look around the mostly barren room they occupied, then seated himself on a slightly dusty crate, his legs dangling like a child's would.

"Talk?" After the confusing and painful incident on the roof with Gaara, she'd decided she didn't like it when someone said they wanted or needed to talk.

"Relax," Yomi said softly, yawning a little before carrying on. "I promise it's not anything bad, okay?" He patted the spot beside him on the crate. "Sit."

With obvious reluctance, she perched on the edge of the wooden surface and looked at him expectantly. "Go ahead then, but quickly please. I have some things I have to do."

Yomi nodded, his face instantly going from amused to serious. "I"m concerned about you."

"Is this about that assassin? Because there's nothing..."

"It's not about Ruka, though I admit I am a little worried about that, too." He eyed her sideways, noticing the odd look on her face and rushing to continue. "Not much, though. I think you can take that giant bastard without too many problems."

"What is it then?" Her eyes darted away from his, coming to rest on the smeared footprints they'd left in the thin layer of dust on the floor.

"You're very close to the Kazekage." The image of what he'd seen on the roof kept flashing back into his mind, and he knew what he saw in her eyes when she looked at Gaara, even if she didn't know it herself. Yomi was a lot of things, and perhaps he came across as too flippant to be Anbu, but he was actually very observant and quite good at what he did. Gaara was harder to read than Hitori, but harder didn't mean impossible. He watched her face redden a little as she bit her lip, and decided she probably wasn't going to reply. "Hitori, if you love him..."

Her head snapped towards him in shock, her skin going from flushed to pale as fear jolted through her. With a calmness she didn't feel, she rose to her feet and walked out of the room. Yomi never said anything serious without a reason, and her mind shrank from the questions his words had raised. She'd check in with Gaara later. For now, she was just going to go ahead and walk over to the training area, even though it wasn't yet time to meet Kankurou there.

"Well shit," Yomi muttered to the dust bunnies under the shelf next to him. "That didn't go as well as I'd hoped it would." Standing up, he dusted off his backside and headed towards Kankurou's room. In spite of himself, he'd decided he liked the puppet user after all.

Like a parody of a spy, Yomi glanced all around before cracking open the door to Kankurou's room and stepping inside. Immediately, the smell of wood oil overwhelmed him and he sneezed loudly, unintentionally announcing his presence.

Kankurou glanced up at him from where he was kneeling on the floor, tinkering with one of his puppets. "Ne, Yomi kun. How'd it go?"

"About like I expected it to." Yomi leaned back against the wall and slid down it, collapsing in a little heap.

"I guess it's a good thing I already had that message sent to Gaara, then...?" Grinning, Kankurou extended a hand down to Yomi and pulled him up off the floor. "Come on. I know you want to watch this as much as I do."

Snickering softly, Yomi followed him out. The pair of conspirators ran over to the training area, coming up on it from the wrong side, and then carefully climbing one of the huge rock walls. They'd scouted the area earlier and found what would be the perfect spot to sit and watch the fun to come without being seen.

Yomi peered over the edge and smirked a little, seeing Hitori already there. He giggled when Kankurou's eyes fell on her and the other man choked just a little. "Yeah, that's the same reaction I had." A wistful sigh escaped his lips as he closed his eyes, a silly smile on his face. "Your brother's a lucky, lucky man."

"I can't wait to see his reaction to the 'new' Hitori," Kankurou laughed, then quieted quickly, having spotted Gaara just walking onto the grounds. "Here we go."

Hitori leaned over to pull a kunai out of a target and saw movement out of the corner of her eye. "You're late," she said as she turned towards what she presumed was Kankurou.

"My apologies." Gaara's brow raised as he watched her stiffen upon realizing he wasn't who she expected. The new clothes she had on were flattering, in an entirely distracting way, and he was surprised to see her without the mask. He had a feeling his brother was up to something the moment he received the message, but now found himself unable, and unwilling, to take his eyes away from her to scan around for Kankurou.

"I thought you were Kankurou." She turned away again and went back to throwing kunai into the targets furthest from her, doing her best to keep her hands from shaking. It was probably too much to hope that he would just go away.

"My brother isn't feeling well, and requested that I meet you here instead." Crossing his arms over his chest, he continued on. "He felt you would want to train anyway, and I am the only person available right now."

Furious now, Hitori spun around and glared at him, her kunai still buried deep in the centers of the targets, and forgotten. "You're volunteering to train with me?" At his nod, she paused, closing her eyes as she decided she would prove to him that she wasn't the weakling he seemed to think she was. "Fine. But if you take it easy on me, I will..."

She never got to finish the sentence, but instead found herself crashing hard into the ground, her back stinging furiously. The giant sand claw was already drawing away from her and back towards him by the time she opened her eyes a second later. A grim smile crossed her face when the pain from his hit lingered even after she stood. That definitely wasn't taking it easy.

His eyes narrowed a little as she jumped back to her feet, but he didn't move, remaining in the same spot with his hands hanging at his sides. She obviously felt she had something to prove, and he'd let her do it, if it would mean an end to her anger.

Watching from above, Yomi nearly leaped off the wall when Hitori was sent into the ground. "That bastard! I'll..." His words abruptly cut off when Kankurou's hand clamped firmly over his mouth.

"If you don't shut up, we're going to get caught, and Gaara would not be pleased." He frowned hard at his tiny cohort. "Got it?"

Afraid he might suffocate if he didn't agree, Yomi nodded shortly. "I don't know if I can watch this." His face took on a slightly greenish cast. The memories of his violent encounter with Hitori were still too fresh in his mind.

Hitori suddenly darted to the side with a speed that was surprising, and Gaara sent his sand out after her. The look of anger on her face was quickly replaced by determination as she easily avoided his attacks, moving faster each time she turned. She was testing him, he realized after a few long minutes, and with each move she made, she drew a little closer to where he stood.

In spite of the first hit, Hitori began to wonder if he was merely humoring her after all. She'd no sooner had that thought than she saw his eyes narrow a little again and her feet were pulled out from under her. Closing her eyes, she concentrated her chakra, calling out "Otoshibuta." The giant boar shaped slab of earth crashed down towards Gaara and a wall of sand obscured her vision. She took the opportunity to move even closer, drawing her tanto as she ran up behind him. The flat of the blade swung at his shoulder and she swore softly as sand caught and held it. Using that jutsu had drained her more than she was willing to admit.

Gaara was surprised by her strength, and the ferocity with which she fought him. It hadn't been that long since she'd been confined to bed, and already she'd recovered so much. He could tell she was tiring quickly, though his attacks didn't slow or let up. She still moved in a blur, and he would remain unable to catch her, unless he could find a pattern to her movements.

More time passed while he studied her, and the pattern began to form in his mind. The next time she moved, he sent a sand claw to where he guessed she would end up and scored a solid hit, wincing a little as she impacted the ground hard and rolled across several feet of packed earth before coming to a stop and laying still.

Gasping for breath, Hitori let her eyes fall closed. Her entire body ached from that last hit, and she had no doubt she'd find bruises soon. She remained perfectly still, aside from her heaving chest, waiting to see what he would do.

When she still didn't move after another minute or so, Gaara let the sand fall and walked towards her slowly. The thought that maybe he'd hit her harder than he intended crossed his mind as he crouched beside her, reaching one hand out to roll her from her side to her back. The moment his fingers touched her shoulder, Hitori attacked.

Flat on his back, Gaara stared up at her, feeling the kunai pushing against his neck, though the sand kept it from actually touching his skin. At some point her hair had come loose from the ponytail and now fell around them both, brushing the ground on either side of him. He could feel the warm press of her legs against his hips where she straddled him. She stared right back at him, her breathing still rapid, but a small smirk on her face.

Satisfied that she'd made her point, Hitori leaned up and pulled the kunai away from his neck, tossing it into the ground beside them. She started to move away from him, but paused when his hands grasped her waist, holding her still as he sat up. This close, meeting his eyes was like drowning. A shiver passed through her as one of his hands slid into her hair, his other arm wrapping around her and pulling her closer a moment before he kissed her.

Yomi flashed a huge grin at Kankurou as the pair exchanged a high five, before climbing back down the wall. Once they reached the bottom, the Anbu glanced down at his hand slightly puzzled, then blinked up at the puppet user.

"Why'd we just do that?" A second later, recognition dawned in his brown eyes. "Oh! Oh, that's right. It was a hive five."

Kankurou laughed softly and started jogging lazily back towards the tower. "Yomi, man, it's called a high five. High five."

"Right, that's what I said," Yomi shot back, turning to glance over his shoulder at the training area.

Hitori's eyes were still open wide when Gaara finally pulled back from her. At some point, though she didn't remember doing it, her arms had wound around his neck. Her lips parted as she attempted to speak, but his finger raised and gently pressed against them. Their eyes met and locked, a moment of silent understanding passing between them.

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A cold rain started falling a few hours after she left Konoha, a seemingly never ending downpour. Thick drops soaked her, plastering the sodden fabric of her uniform against her skin, and causing thick tendrils of hair to wrap around her neck and arms, and cling. Nisei squinted, trying to see through the hazardous sheet of gray before her. A low fog had rolled in at the onset of the storm, and everything had a monochromatic, almost desolate look to it. The scent she had been following had suddenly vanished, most likely washed away by the heavy rain. Losing the trail so abruptly made the chase more dangerous than she could afford. Taking on an Anbu from Root was different than fighting a regular Konoha Anbu, vastly different. Konoha's Anbu still maintained a sense of right and wrong, holding to a strict moral code, but Danzou's mercilessly trained Root organization mindlessly did as they were ordered.

"It didn't take you very long to find me." She turned slowly, trying to discern where the voice was coming from, without appearing ignorant of it's location. The horrible weather gave her opponent a heavy advantage by muffling the natural sounds and smells she would normally make use of. It felt like he was close, though distant enough to remain hidden, and she knew he could have tried to kill her without warning. An unpleasant tickling sensation between her shoulder blades made her wonder if the game had been turned on her, making her the mouse instead of the cat.

"Ruka, from Anbu root." Nisei could see him now, stepping out of the growth ahead of her, smirking a little. Long black and blond hair framed his face, his brown eyes staring calmly back at her. She briefly wondered why he wasn't wearing his mask, and then remembered it was referred to as 'unique' in the information Tsunade had. He probably didn't want to be recognized or remembered, and would refrain from wearing it until he'd entered Suna. Ruka was listed as a water style fighter, Nisei remembered reading, which gave her a much needed advantage over the elite Anbu. "You are wanted as a Missing Nin. You have turned your back on your master, and betrayed your village. I have been asked to bring you back without harming you. If you force me to fight, then that choice will lead only to your death."

"Did you write that all out and then memorize it, just for the occasion?" The cool tone of his voice surprised her, especially in the face of her threat. She wasn't used to dealing with such an emotionless reaction, though his sarcastic way of speaking suggested he wasn't without at least a sense of superiority. If everything in the report on Ruka was accurate, then Nisei was fairly confident she had this fight won.

"You've set out to harm someone I consider a friend," she murmured, bringing her hands up in front of her as she mentally prepared for the battle ahead. "I won't let you anywhere near Suna!"

"My, my… Aren't we confident?" He chuckled to himself, pressing his hand against the tree he was suddenly leaning against. Nisei blinked, waiting for her eyes to adjust. Did all of Anbu Root have that speed? He might be even faster than Hitori, which was worrisome. Back when she fought the redhead in a training match, that speed had ensured Nisei's defeat. Ruka blurred before her eyes as he darted past again. Now it seemed he was just showing off. "I'll make this fast. I don't have time for children."

She nodded briefly, her face taking on a look of intense concentration as she stepped onto firmer ground. Kunai appeared in her hands as she narrowed her eyes, taking less than half a second to gauge the distance between them before throwing both. His long range taijutsu was apparently very much like hers, their heavy daggers meeting halfway with a tortured, metallic crash, then rebounding in opposite directions to sink in the thick mud between them. Both were moving before the small explosions rocked the area where the kunai landed, the attached tags going off almost in unison.

As they closed with each other, she just managed to dodge the punch heading for her face before launching an attack of her own. His other hand caught hers with a resounding smack, his blocking very effective, though his speed was the overwhelming part. At the moment of release his leg came up, the bottom of his sandal connecting with her crossed arms just above her chest.

That blow had been aimed for her chin, and she shuddered to think of what would have happened had it connected with her face rather than her armor-shrouded forearms. The force from it sent her against the tree behind her, and she quickly turned to avoid the next hit. He was insanely fast and incredibly strong, though she couldn't say she was very surprised by that. Danzou only took the best into his elite ranks. She stabbed the opposite side of the trunk and waited for the exploding tag to curl as it burned, jumping back as the tree toppled over, making the earth shudder a little at its impact. Ruka stood there unharmed, just visible through the slowly dissipating haze of smoke. Nisei had expected him to avoid it, though she'd hoped it would prove just a bit more of a distraction than it had. She planted her feet more firmly on the ground and slid her katana from the sheath on her back.

Nisei held the blade out sideways in front of her chest, showing it to him in the traditional way Konoha Anbu were trained to start their battles. His ninjato stance copied hers, then their bodies moved in a dizzying rush, and they met with a violent clash of steel against steel, the blades grinding with a shriek of tortured metal until they locked. Ruka's greater strength was quickly overpowering hers, and she could only think of one way out of this undesirable position. Clenching her teeth, Nisei allowed his ninjato to successfully pin her katana into the dirt, letting her body also lower, following the motion of her blade, and just missing his sharp reversing slash, losing several inches of her hair in the process. She tried not to think too much about the soft, cold whisper of the steel as it just missed her neck. It was like the promise of a deadly kiss.

He pulled the lock of hair from the blade, tossing the black strands aside carelessly as he pointed the tip at her. "If you do not interfere from here on out, I will let you live. But 'If you force me to fight, then that choice will lead only to your death'."

Already in motion again, Nisei didn't bother to answer his taunting quote of her threat, though she kept her eyes locked on him as she darted across the river. The rain thickened, the drops falling faster as a deafening roar of thunder rolled across the sky, seeming to shake everything around her. Nisei glanced around furiously, unable to spot her opponent through the downpour. Less than a moment later, the Anbu Root flashed in front of her eyes, and she found herself flying through the air to sink into the churning river. The water closed around her, prickling her skin with the odd burning sensation of ice, a shock to her overheated body. Her adrenaline rush seemed to be fading the more she lingered in the cold, liquid embrace.

Seeing Ruka's hand descending towards her, she moved quickly away, pulling herself out of the water as he stood there, watching her calmly. She gasped a little on the opposite shore, calming some when she decided now was the perfect time to use _that_ technique. It was the only technique Kakashi had bothered to teach her when he was her sensei. Nisei being a lightning style user like himself, the Jonin felt somewhat obligated. Many Anbu don't know much when it comes to jutsu, usually only what their sensei decides they should learn. For Nisei's sake, Kakashi had taught her one.

'_Raiton…Hound…_' She focused her chakra into her right arm, and held it tightly. The eerie, chirpy noise of lightning swirling with her energy was loud in her ears, and growing louder as the rain fed it. The beast sprang forth, bolting in a jagged flash of blue and white towards Ruka. It tore easily through the water barrier the Anbu threw up to block the attack, as if shredding through tissue paper, and ripped at his side, grazing the skin just above his hip and leaving the entire area numb.

"That could have been dangerous…" Ruka murmured as he held a hand to his side, seeing blood when he glanced at it a moment later. The wound was not a serious one, but it was enough to slow him down a little. Nisei took the shocked look on the Root's face for opportunity, darting towards him, intending to attack, when without hesitation, he brought his hand up and slammed it forcefully into her chest, stunning her. As she fell to the ground, the smirk of disregard he turned on her only fueled her anger more, though her body was begging for a surcease to her demands on it. Ninjutsu took a lot out of its user. Gasping on the ground, struggling to rise, she was now at his mercy. She had just regained her feet when his dark voice called out, "Suiro no Jutsu!"

The water prism closed around her and her feet left the surface, trapping her within the globe. She knew she couldn't move. The more you felt like you weren't breathing, the more you wouldn't be able to, but that was just the side effect of panic at being seemingly trapped in a ball of water. You were able to breathe, and to speak even, but you weren't allowed to shift, or perform a jutsu. Holding her this way was only a waste the Root's time, so what was the point of using this jutsu? The more she wondered about his intentions, the more her heart started to beat faster. Every possible answer that bloomed in her mind was worse than the one before it.

"Raiton Ikazuchi no Utte!" As the words left his mouth, her eyes widened in alarm. A Thunder Funeral wasn't exactly what she expected a water user would have up his sleeves. This was going to be even worse than anything she'd imagined. The bolt shot straight down from the sky, and hit the prism with a shock of electricity, consuming it with a blinding flare of light. Pain that had been unknown to her before, roared like an inferno through her entire body. A scream rose quickly in her chest and ripped from her throat, continuing until there was no more breath to create sound.

He released the prism immediately, and allowed her body to fall, smirking when Nisei remained motionless at his feet. "Stupid girl. You should have listened to me, or perhaps you should have joined with the Foundation. Oh well, decipher this as you may, in heaven." The Anbu gave her a body a rough push with his foot, and watched as the current carried her downstream.

_Warmth surrounded her, a soft feeling like afternoon sunshine on a spring day. Kakashi stood before her, regarding her with his usual bored stare._

_"Would you repeat that, please?" He asked softly, not sure he'd heard her correctly the first time._

_"I want to learn a jutsu! You promised you'd teach me one, Kakashi senpai." Nisei planted her fists on her hips and stared up at him expectantly. God, she'd been so young then. It was strange to see herself this way, as if looking down from a high perch. For some reason, she didn't feel the need to question why she was seeing this, though._

_She saw a bright light, and then Kouki's smiling face, as he stood proudly with his new team, introducing her. _

_"Ne, you're a Captain now, Kouki kun! Congratulations." Jealousy burned within her, but she refused to let it show, choosing instead to be happy for her friend finally getting what he rightly deserved. "You worked so hard to get here."_

_"You'll make Captain soon, too. I'm sure of it." Another bright smile, a brilliant flash of his startling blue eyes, and then Kouki's face faded, to be replaced by the brooding gaze of the Hokage._

_"Nisei chan, I know you're ready for this, but do you?" She remembered feeling that Tsunade's questioning wasn't meant as a slight, but more as a reason to push herself even harder to complete the mission she'd been given. There'd been so many over the years, she couldn't now remember specifically which mission followed this moment. "You're my most promising Anbu. Now I'm asking you to prove to me that you could be the best."_

_Cold, and the bitter smells of a battlefield, smoke in the air around a broken looking Kakashi as he turned to stare at her, his Sharingan eye blazing a fierce red in the deepening twilight..._

_The soft warmth of Kakashi's hand against her cheek, his body holding hers pinned to the wall as he leaned forward and kissed her. A swift pang of regret clenched at her heart when she thought about what they could have been, if only..._

_Hitori's broken body lying limp, half submerged in the water. There was something important about this face, and the flashes of photographs that followed it. Yomi... Enji... Ruka... She grasped at the feeling, but the harder she tried to reach it, the faster it slipped away._

_Darkness, deep and comforting, holding her in a warm embrace as Kakashi's low voice echoed around her: _

_"I can teach you a lot of things, Nisei, but I can't teach you how to live..."_

_The words trailed off, leaving behind a fading sense of gentle questioning._

Kakashi looked up suddenly from his book, letting it slip unheeded from between his hands. The rain was falling heavily outside his window, tapping against the glass in a syncopated rhythm that had been making him feel sleepy. He stretched, trying to ease the tension in his shoulders, then sighing as it only grew worse. Pain shot up his spine in a jolt, causing a tremor through his body. Something felt wrong, and trying to place it was pointless when he could only think about one thing. The letter Nisei left him was still stuck between the fourth and fifth chapters of the book his eyes fell on as he glanced over at the small table next to his bed. The two pills sat there like a warning, as if saying his door was to bound to be opened by an angry Anbu Captain if he didn't take them when he was supposed to. A strange feeling came over him, and he reached for the Anbu picture next to them, only to see the glass in the frame crack the moment his fingers touched it.

'Nisei…'

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End of chapter. Thanks for reading!


	15. メモリ Memory

Author's Note: Another chapter already! It seems like it's going so fast now! As always, we sincerely thank you for the hits and reviews! It's always a pleasure to know our work is being enjoyed. Hope you like this one!

Moon's Light, Reality's Dream  
月の光、うつつの夢  
Chapter Fourteen - メモリ (Memory)

頬に残ってたはずの熱が思い出せない  
I can't recall the temperature that should have remained on my cheek.  
朦朧の狭間で見たのは　寒色の現実  
The shadows I saw in these dim spaces were the cold colored reality.

The more Shizune read over the report in her trembling hand, the deeper her frown grew. Lady Tsunade wasn't going to react well to this information, and that was the worst part of her job. The brunette hated being the constant bearer of bad news. There was no such thing as 'good news' in the ninja world, especially since everything usually started with something wrong. Too many times Shizune had run frantically down this long hallway and thrown open the heavy door, to stare into cold, hardened topaz eyes.

Here she was doing it again, except this time she decided to take her time walking to the Hokage's office. The evidence left her no option but to tell Tsunade that her beloved operative was missing, and possibly in this rare case, dead. It was strange not to find a body, especially at such a graphically illustrated scene. The investigating teams were able to piece together most of the probable course the fight took. Finding only a lock of black hair and a toppled tree wasn't very satisfying, raising more questions than it answered, and according to the document held tightly in Shizune's hand, a body hadn't been discovered, though the teams of Anbu and Jonin alike searched thoroughly for miles around the perimeter.

Pausing, Shizune willed herself to take the hardest step, her gentle knock at the door at odds with the hammering of her heart. At first, the blond didn't notice that the other woman had stepped into the room, not even the knock had reached her. A worried frown creased Tsunade's face, evidence that she had been engrossed in her thoughts. The rhythm of the rain drumming softly against the window was soothing, and she had quickly found herself lost in the melody of it, before Shizune's presence loomed out of the corner of her eye.

"Well... ?" The tired tone in Tsunade's voice left no question that she had yet to sleep, and Shizune's sad gaze fell to rest on the floor. At moments like these, she had to force herself to remember that it wasn't selfish, but necessary to who Tsunade had chosen to become. She was no longer the reckless, unlucky gambler, thriving on 'what if' and 'who knows', but getting right to the point, whenever there was one, and finding one even if there wasn't. She wanted answers, and Shizune was the one Tsunade looked to when she needed them.

Shizune started to slowly shake her head, watching as those smoky gold eyes narrowed. "Team Kouki has yet to return, but I doubt that their findings will be any different from the other teams you've sent..."

"What exactly did they find?" Tsunade already knew that Team Kouki wouldn't have returned yet. It was the 'Kouki' part that left no question in her mind. The Anbu Captain would search methodically for Nisei, leaving no detail, no matter how tiny, overlooked. The sudden guilt that next struck the blond shocked her, feeling like a bucket of ice water pouring over her head. In all of the ensuing chaos, she'd forgotten Kakashi.

"Some strands of Nisei's hair, and a tree that was toppled over. Anything else, like blood would have been washed away by now." It wasn't appropriate to commend Shizune for the strength in her voice, but this time she kept it from trembling. The look Tsunade turned on her was enough to make her cave in, but she stood firmly. "Nisei couldn't be found, and from the overwhelming evidence, or lack thereof, I should say... She'll have to be classified MIA."

'And presumed dead' was the phrase she left lingering unspoken, knowing the thought would have to cross Tsunade's mind. Shizune wouldn't be the one to say it first. She wasn't about to throw those words out there, especially since Tsunade would just disregard them, and insist that it couldn't possibly be true, in spite of the evidence starting to point to the contrary. One of the reasons Tsunade liked Nisei so much, was that the girl was as stubborn as the Hokage herself. Even when Nisei should have stayed down, she kept getting up, and Tsunade helped nurture that quality within the girl.

"Tell this to no one. Not yet." Tsunade stood behind her desk and slowly walked towards the door. "I refuse to believe that she's dead. Give it time."

Shizune stuttered, shocked by the order to maintain silence. "T-Time?"

"I don't want someone to do something idiotic, and call it justice." Tsunade let the words linger there, hoping that Shizune could quickly catch her drift from the emphasis on the word 'someone.' Kakashi had only just recovered, and the chances of him doing nothing, after hearing this news, were zero. His body needed to take it easy, and he would get no rest, unable to stand idle in the face of this mess. If Nisei was really dead, then Tsunade would have to introduce herself to something called denial, and try to push forward.

Even if it was an unbearable thought.

Kakashi kept his head down as he lay against the hard red roof of the Hokage building over Tsunade's office. He couldn't keep his ears from overhearing the conversation he had specifically gone out of his way to listen in on. His onyx eye remained sharp, as if trying to pierce through the tree in front of him. Nisei being dead wasn't a thought he'd let conquer his mind, but he'd be damned if he could stop the sudden black and white he was seeing just thinking about it. Nisei was smart, and stronger than most people would assume. He would know.

He brought two fingers up in front of his face and disappeared in a cloud of light smoke, reappearing at the large doors at the feet of the village. He took one of the scrolls out of his vest pocket, uncapping it before spreading it out. If anyone was going to be successful in tracking Nisei down, it would be him and his ninken. Not telling him, and hoping that Kakashi wouldn't find out, was ridiculous on Tsunade's part. He knew she just wanted to keep him from being involved in something that his still weakened body might not be able to tolerate, but the Jonin was more than positive that exerting energy for something like this was necessary.

"Kuchiyose Doton, Tsuiga no Jutsu..." His voice was quiet as he summoned his ninja hounds. When the air cleared, Pakkun lay across the top of Bull's head, inching closer. Urushi, Shiba and Bisuke stood in proud formation, alongside Akino, Uhei, and Guruko. Maybe Kakashi didn't need to bring out all eight of them, but time itself was slipping from his grasp. It was an uneasy feeling, and he knew he wouldn't be able to rest at all until she was found.

Pakkun rolled his eyes lazily toward his master. "What is it?"

Kakashi said nothing, simply holding out the letter from his crouched position, watching as Pakkun's nose brushed across it, picking up the scent.

"Kakashi, this scent..." Pakkun trailed off, before stiffening slightly. "Nisei's? These ninken follow the trail of blood, a precise scent..."

"Her blood has been spilled-"

"You know what I meant," Pakkun growled gently, knowing that this was a very personal case, and with Kakashi summoning all of them, it was obviously urgent. He couldn't do it by himself, and if he tried, it would only end up wasting valuable time. "If I can pick up her scent from this paper, then I'm sure they can too. Your word is the law we abide by. Nisei, to be found, it is..." The dogs then separated, all except Pakkun. "Ne, Kakashi, let's go..."

"Hold it right there." Kakashi was no sooner up on his feet, than the authoritative voice forced him to turn towards it, his usual lazy expression changing to one of determination. Tsunade stood there with her hands at her waist, and her topaz eyes narrowed. "Where do you think you're going, Kakashi?"

"I think we both know where I'm going." The blond was bound to get angry, and Kakashi was certainly uncomfortable with his current inability to be obedient, but there were some things he felt he didn't need to ask permission for, especially if it would only be denied.

Her face didn't change much at his words, only possibly growing slightly more annoyed. "Team Kouki is still searching the area. I doubt that they will come back with nothing. Why don't you wait until then?"

"Waiting, waiting..." He sighed. What an offensive name, 'Kouki'. "Maybe that was the mistake that we all made. Maa, no matter. My hounds are on her trail. They will find her, and I will bring her back."

"Impossible! As the Fifth Hokage, I demand that you stay here." Furious, she knew that he wouldn't reason with her. He had such an irritating way of finding things out, and she'd known that keeping a secret like this would be difficult, though she'd hoped it would take a little longer to leak out. Was all of this her fault? She bit her lip as she continued to stare at the Jonin. He was a lot like his father, and with every selfless decision he made, he became more like the person he resented the most.

"Even though I took my medicine..." Kakashi trailed, his voice wistful and tinged with disappointment as he pocketed his scroll, then turned to flash her a happy eye-crease. The tension between them grew even thicker. "Gomen nasai."

"Kakashi-" She stepped forward, only to find he was already gone - disappearing into the forest with his faithful ninken. Her angry glare covered the entire vacant area as she slowly turned her back on it.

Pakkun remained beside Kakashi as they touched down on the firm branches and pushed off again. The wind was strong and cold, a mixture surprisingly less intrusive than it should have been against the Jonin's skin. It was for the best to keep himself numb to everything, for now. If he stopped to remember, he was certain it would only slow him down. All of the years he'd avoided looking at Nisei, were time he had wasted. What did he have to show for it? What had he been doing, who else had he been thinking of...?

"Akino has found the river." Pakkun commented lowly, looking to Kakashi as he broke the Jonin out of his masochistic reverie. "Ano, Kakashi, is it okay, what you said to Godaime?"

Still uncomfortable about the confrontation in question, Kakashi averted his gaze to the ground. Directly disobeying the Hokage was something that only a fool would do. He knew the woman well enough to know that she would accept his decision, and get over it quickly, but it bothered him anyway. For him, Nisei would now come before his village, since he had failed in the past to keep her before anything else, or to keep her at all. Tsunade had to know that so long as Nisei remained 'MIA' or 'presumed dead,' it would continuously eat away at him, like a slow death. It was unhealthy to lie in bed overwhelmed by guilt.

Kakashi glanced at his trusty companion, his expression revealing everything as he decided it was pointless to attempt to hide the fact that he was already a mess. "It'll have to be."

-

_Kakashi..._

Slowly, Nisei blinked her tired eyes open. The surroundings her gaze met weren't familiar, but at least it she was inside, warm, and away from the elements. She was relieved that she was alive, and no longer subjected to memories, forced to relive the things that she had failed to do, or say. Pain overwhelmed her the moment her body flinched in an attempt at movement. With startling clarity, she remembered the summoned bolt of lightning shooting cruelly through the water globe she'd been trapped in.

"Finally, you're awake..." She hadn't noticed that someone else was in the room until she heard the soft, tremulous voice. It wasn't Ruka, thankfully, though she quickly realized it was slightly ridiculous to worry, even briefly, that he would have stuck around just to torture her some more. Nisei was relieved when her eyes settled on the old man, and she let her head fall back with a sigh. With his short hunched figure, she wondered how it was possible that he even got her here.

She pushed the thought aside because it didn't matter, since he was the one who saved her anyway. "Thank you."

He hushed her gently, concerned now with the cuts he hadn't yet managed to patch up. "Don't talk. It must be painful. You have tears all over your body. Lightning kisses aren't kind, are they?"

"It was a funeral," Nisei muttered bitterly, her body prickling all over as if she could still feel the electricity dancing through her. "He wasn't supposed to know Water and Lightning."

"It is possible, is it not? Jonin learn two elements, and spend a long time enhancing that... Correct?" The old guy knew too much, but at the same time, far too little. The Anbu world was different from a regular ninja life. They had many restrictions placed on them because they held so much law. Anbu took care of the dirty work: the assassinations, the capture of major Bingo book rogues, and the hunting of other Missing and rogue nin. Why they weren't allowed to regularly learn techniques was beyond her. Though some were prone to two elements, the only other Anbu she could think of, off the top of her head, with this unique ability was Yamato.

"The man who did this to me was Anbu. He had no right teaching himself such things." She winced, feeling a pulsing heat spreading throughout her body. The pain came from the hard pounding of her heartbeat. At this rate, without any form of healing technique, she wouldn't be able to go anywhere anytime soon. It was a sobering thought.

"I understand," was all he said in return as he reached for another thick roll of gauze, then returned to wrapping up her left arm. The image of the way he found her wouldn't leave his mind. The girl was lucky her unconscious body somehow caught on something, and drifted half onto land. The salt in the water had helped to cleanse her wounds, but her lower half needed to be warmed. The wood from the fire was still hissing and crackling, slowly dying down, as opposed to the way it roared hours before, when he had her in directly front of it.

He'd been frantic, then, to bring her bluish skin back to a warm pale. Her skin reacted at first like a rash, but soon, under thick heavy blankets, she returned to a healthier color. Now, these wounds had to stop bleeding, somehow. It was hard to find clean water. The man waited for the buckets outside of his small cabin to fill, before he started dabbing carefully at each deep bite the lightning had taken out of her flesh.

"I had to change your clothes," he said gently, while keeping his eyes trained on what he was doing. "These belong to my daughter. She is away at school right now, so I doubt she would mind. I folded your old clothes and set them in a bag. They're torn and covered in blood."

"Thank you, again..." She let her eyes close, finding it difficult to continue to hold them open. "My name is Nisei."

He smiled warmly, his old age only highlighted by the crinkling wrinkles that gave his face the look of a prune. At that point, it was impossible not smile back. "Nice to meet you, Nisei of Anbu. I'm Jun."

She wanted to laugh the way he said, 'of Anbu', but the pain in her face kept her from doing so. It was already becoming annoying, not being able to anything for herself in the slightest. Patience was something that Nisei didn't have. She needed to report to Tsunade, and she needed that message to be conveyed as quickly as possible. A sigh escaped her as she bitterly missed the convenience of the trained hawks that flew straight to the Hokage's message drop point.

"I'm certain they've been looking for me, but wonder if maybe they've already stopped...?" Nisei trailed off, thinking of the many teams Tsunade was sure to send out. Kouki. She could see him so clearly in her mind. Kouki wouldn't ever stop searching for her, though they'd parted on very awkward personal terms, and she was already dreading seeing him again. Kakashi she couldn't even allow herself the thought of seeing. Tsunade would never let him leave, and he would never make it to her in his condition, even with the speed of his recovery.

"I doubt they've stopped looking." Of course he was just being nice, and trying to make her worry less. She appreciated that at least she had been rescued by someone kind, and also smart. He'd treated all her wounds in the proper way. If it wasn't for him, she would still be half submerged in ice cold water during a storm, or worse. "I'll go prepare some tea."

The Anbu settled back against the bed and stared out the nearby window. It was still raining. One drop of rain merged with another and slid down the glass. Watching it was making her sleepy. She briefly wondered if sleep would be as painful as every other effort she'd made thus far. Those idle thoughts were quickly vanishing, as her mind refused to ignore the possibility that both Kouki and Kakashi were out there searching for her. It was an unshakable, worrisome feeling that made her think things would be simpler if she could just return on her own. But she knew if she were to leave now, she'd only find herself stubbornly walking the path towards Suna.

--------

Hitori sighed heavily where she sat on the floor, leaning against the wall in the darkest corner of her room. Outside her window, the evening sky was just beginning to fade into the purple before dawn. It was an odd hour to be awake, but she hadn't managed to sleep much, anyway. Strange dreams had driven her into consciousness more times than she cared to count. A sudden movement on the opposite wall caught her eye, and she glanced over at it, staring with slowly widening eyes once she recognized what it was.

Shadow puppets.

They moved swiftly, changing between a dog, a bird, a cat-like creature, and finally a butterfly before Yomi himself stepped into the light and grinned at her, looking a little sheepish. "I know you missed my 'shadow puppet theater' performances." He moved closer to her, sitting awkwardly beside her and glancing up at her expectantly.

"I did," she answered seriously, her gaze moving slowly back to the window again. It wasn't like Yomi to just sneak in, unannounced. There must be something weighing on his mind.

"I've received a message from... a friend," he began, keeping his voice low, as seemed fitting in the somber atmosphere. "The Hokage found out about Danzou's assassination plot, and sent someone out to stop Ruka." Wide, deceptively innocent brown eyes met her questioning glance. "The Anbu Captain, Nisei."

The moment Yomi spoke the name, images flooded through Hitori's mind: A kitsune mask, long jet black hair, and piercing golden eyes. A soft, melodic voice filled her head, though cold shivered through her body. Nisei had been the one to find her after the nightmarish battle with Zetsu.

"You know what that means, right?" His hand settled gently on her arm and she turned towards him again. "If Konoha is aware of Danzou's intent, and has acted to stop him, the entire game just changed. This will slow Ruka down, force him to move more carefully. We have... time."

"Time," she repeated, as a swift flash of concern passed through her for the Anbu Captain. They'd only met twice that Hitori could remember, and each time had ended in some sort of defeat for one of them. Heat filled her cheeks as she remembered beating Nisei in that training match, and turning to walk unconcernedly off the field, not caring if the other might be hurt, only that Danzou's eyes shone with pride as he watched her. And then the blurry images from their second meeting flooded back. The obvious worry and regard Nisei held her in, making sure everything possible was done to aid in Hitori's recovery. Shame was a bitter pill to swallow.

Yomi watched her in silence, wondering if he should share the rest of the information he had, worried about how she'd react to it. Obviously, she remembered Nisei, though he wasn't quite sure what would have caused the swift blush that suffused her cheeks after he spoke. Then he remembered what Kankurou had told him. Nisei was the one to find Hitori after she'd failed to rescue Gaara, and nearly gotten herself killed in the process. He would have to tread carefully, here.

Gaara watched from the shadows of the doorway, his narrowed eyes locked on the diminutive Anbu, wondering where Yomi got his information. Sleep had eluded him, as well, driven away by the fear that in spite of everything, he'd wake up to find Hitori gone. He hadn't been able to keep himself from coming down to her room to check on her, and was a little irritated to find her former partner here. What, exactly, had caused Yomi to desert his post and allow himself to become classified as a rogue, to warn Hitori about the danger posed by Ruka? A letter would have done that just as well. Turning away, he walked off slowly towards the room of the only person who might be able to give him an answer: Kankurou.

"Hitori..." Yomi's voice threatened to crack, and he coughed a little, clearing his throat, then starting over. "What is it that you want?" The scene he'd witnessed in the training area the day before refused to leave his mind.

Blinking as the image of Nisei's steady, golden gaze faded from her mind, Hitori looked over at Yomi again. His question came out of nowhere, and confused her a little, calling up feelings that made her shiver. "I'm not sure what you mean...?"

Exasperated, Yomi resisted the urge to tug at his hair, afraid he'd inadvertently rip it out. If he was talking to anyone other than his former partner, he'd be certain such a level of naivete was a complete act. "I mean after we take care of Ruka. What do you want? Do you want to go back to Konoha and become a little Anbu dog again? I'm sure the Hokage would find a way to have you cleared..." He trailed off, his eyes darting past her to watch the lightening sky through the window across the room. "Or do you want to stay here, in Suna... with Gaara?"

"I haven't really thought about it yet," she whispered, her face paling a little as she glanced down at the floor. "Do I even have a choice? I've been ordered to stay here until he releases me, anyway."

Yomi waved his hand around, dismissing everything she said. "As if an order from Danzou is going to hold any sway over you after this? No, those orders don't matter anymore. It would be entirely up to you to decide."

Her mind reeled as that tiny security was ripped from beneath her. For the first time she could remember, she found herself facing a life without being told what to do, without a purpose, and she shrank from it. "He would order me to stay."

Twitching a little, Yomi finally turned to look at her again, rising up on his knees in front of her and gently gripping her shoulders, clenching his jaw to keep from shaking her. "Gaara would not order you to do anything. He needs you to make this choice, just as much as you need to do it." When she still wouldn't meet his eyes, he put one hand under her chin and turned her face up towards his. "Would you really force that pain on him?"

"Pain? I..." Hitori trailed off, her eyes lowering, avoiding what she saw in his. Yomi's words were sinking her into confusion again. "Nothing I could do would cause him pain."

Leaping up with a curse, Yomi stalked over to the window, clenching at the sill until his knuckles turned white. "Stubborn girl," he muttered bitterly. Trying to calm himself a little, he drew in a few slow, deep breaths before turning around to nearly glare at her, his eyes narrowing dangerously. "Are you so blind that you still can't see that he loves you?"

Shaking her head, pale and trembling, Hitori shrank against the wall, the memory of Gaara's kiss making her lips burn. Her eyes fell closed as Yomi walked towards her, crouching down in front of her again. He didn't speak, and made no move to touch her, just simply watched her for a long moment. A strange fluttering sensation filled her body as her lips slowly parted. "Yomi, I'm scared." The words came in a shaking whisper, tears easing from beneath her closed lids to run down her face.

Chastened, Yomi reached a hand out to gently brush them away. "You'll never conquer that fear if you keep running from it. You have to face it... and admit how you feel, too." His hand drew away as he stood slowly and walked out of the room. He wasn't paying attention to where he was going, muttering under his breath, and mentally berating himself for having felt the need to involve himself in something that was really none of his business. If he'd only managed to make the situation worse... His thoughts trailed off as he rounded a corner and nearly collided with someone walking in the opposite direction. Frowning, he glanced up to meet Gaara's calm, appraising eyes, and his heart sank within his chest.

Alone with her thoughts, Hitori struggled to calm the confusion in her mind. She had no idea how to face a fear. It wasn't like facing an opponent in battle. There, the lines were drawn, the rules understood, and the outcome clear: win or lose, kill or be killed. Emotional war left her feeling weak and powerless, adrift in an ocean of uncertainty. She didn't even know the first step to take. More tears fell, coming quicker now, to replace the ones Yomi had brushed away. They dripped unheeded from her face to break on the floor.

Yomi stepped swiftly to the side and started forward again, hoping to avoid a conversation with the Kazekage. Gaara's hand darted out and caught his arm, and Yomi winced a little, taking a deep breath before turning to meet the other's eyes. He waited for the redhead to say something, becoming more nervous the longer the silence stretched.

_"He swore he'd kill you if you ever hurt her."_

The short conversation with Kankurou replayed itself in Gaara's mind while he watched the Anbu. Everything his brother said, what little there was, made more sense the longer he thought about it. Kankurou was convinced that Yomi wasn't any sort of rival, and Gaara wanted to agree with him, but something about the way the smaller man's eyes shifted to avoid his, made him wonder. Finally, after several minutes, during which Yomi grew more tense, his deep, steady voice broke the silence. "Where is Hitori?"

_"Don't worry, ne?" Kankurou laughed softly as Gaara walked towards the door. "He said he saw no point in fighting a battle he knew he'd lose."_

_"What?" Gaara asked, turning to flash his brother an odd look._

"As far as I know, she's still in her room." Yomi barely suppressed a sigh of relief when Gaara released him and turned away, continuing in the direction of Hitori's room. An uncomfortable thought made him twitch, and before he realized what he was doing, he was already speaking again. "I'm afraid I may have let a few things slip when I was talking to her. Like your little secret... " The words trailed off and he looked away guiltily as Gaara stopped to glance back over his shoulder at him.

_"There's nothing to gain from fighting over her, because he knows she loves you."_

"Secret?" He waited, wishing Yomi would just hurry up and say what he needed to. The more time that passed, the greater his worry grew. No matter how well meaning the Anbu was, his words were more likely to cause Hitori to panic and flee, than anything.

"That you love her." Yomi shifted nervously, his eyes locked to his feet.

"I've never made that a secret."

Steady footsteps started up again as Yomi felt his jaw dropping open. He'd never expected Gaara to admit to it so readily. 'Maybe now isn't the best time for the two of them to be left alone together,' he thought and took one step after the redhead before stopping himself. He'd already meddled more than enough. It was well past time for him to distance himself from the entire thing. He didn't need to question his own motives. They were all too uncomfortably obvious inside his head, but that didn't make it any easier to let go.

A soft noise made Hitori glance up to see Gaara just stepping into the room. Her hands raised to wipe at the tears on her face, but he crossed the small space between them and knelt before her, capturing her wrists gently. The look of concern in his eyes made something shatter within her, and she pulled her hands away from him, finally letting go. She leaned towards him, pressing her face against his chest, as all of the emotions she'd been trying so hard to hold back burst out of her in silent crying that shook her entire body. Her hands wrapped in the fabric near her face as his arms settled around her, one hand running gently over her hair before his arms tightened, and he leaned down to press his lips softly against the top of her head.

It felt good to be held this way, surrounded by the warmth of his embrace and the lightly mingled scents that came from his clothes. She felt protected in a way that didn't reflect on her own strengths or weaknesses. A new thought slowly bloomed in her mind as her breath hitched in her chest, the crying spell coming to an end, and leaving a calm, drowsy feeling in it's wake. She fit here, she belonged here. Acceptance was the first step towards facing her fear, and discovering that was like having a huge weight lifted from her mind. Her eyes fluttered closed and she sighed softly.

Gaara raised his head slowly at her sigh, feeling her body relax against his. When he was sure she was asleep, he shifted a little, lifting her gently into his arms before he stood and walked over to her bed. He lowered her onto it, resting one knee on the soft surface and leaning over her when her hands refused to release his clothes. Her face wore a look of peace he couldn't remember ever seeing there before, her lips just curving up in the hint of a smile. One of his hands brushed lightly along her cheek, and her eyes cracked open a little at the contact.

"Gaara," she said softly, her voice not much more than a breath as her hands finally disentangled from his clothes, lowering to rest lightly over her stomach. "I'm sorry."

His hand remained gently against her face as he stared down at her. "You've done nothing to be sorry for," he answered slowly, wondering why she felt she had to apologize. She moved a little beneath him and his hand fell away as he leaned back, watching her ease herself up into a sitting position.

"I didn't understand what you meant before, but I think I do now." Hitori opened her eyes the rest of the way and met his, feeling her face flushing a little. "When you said you wanted to keep me safe, you didn't mean that I was weak. You said it because you were worried, because..." She trailed off, uncertain of herself, and afraid of the words haunting her thoughts.

He smiled a little as her blush darkened, and she glanced away, biting her lower lip. For a long moment he watched as she struggled to say something, her eyes closing tightly when she realized she couldn't force any more words to come. The unspoken thoughts and feelings seemed to hang in the air between them, like a deep breath before a storm. Gaara reached out and gently turned her face back to his, waiting until her eyes opened before speaking again. "Hitori," he leaned closer to her, his hand settling softly against her neck, "you don't have to say anything." Words weren't really necessary when her eyes told him everything, anyway.

A loud noise in the hallway outside, followed by a stream of vibrant and inventive swearing, broke the mood and drew their gazes to the doorway. A breathless Yomi appeared a moment later, followed closely by Kankurou, both wearing matching looks of worry. Yomi's hand was clenched tightly around a piece of paper he was waving violently through the air.

"Nisei's missing!"

--

End of chapter. Thanks for reading!


	16. 失われています見つけられます Lost and Found

Author's Note: Thanks again, guys, for all the hits and the reviews. We hope you're continuing to enjoy the story.

Moon's Light, Reality's Dream  
月の光、うつつの夢  
Chapter Fifteen - 失われています見つけられます (_Lost and Found_)

棘を伝う睡眠_  
My sleep is going along with these thorns_  
身体に絡ませられたRestraint  
_A Restraint that entangles my body_

Yomi muttered under his breath, getting himself into 'mission mode' as Hitori adjusted the straps of the light armor around one of her arms. She glanced back over her shoulder at the pair on the steps in front of the Kazekage tower. Gaara stood next to Kankurou, his face wearing the same expressionless look as always, but it seemed to Hitori that he was having trouble keeping it that way. As if in an attempt at reassurance, she smiled at him a little before checking over the various weapons and items she carried.

"Ready?" Yomi's question was voiced in the brisk, all business tone he adopted whenever they were heading into possible danger. Until they returned, he would speak only when necessary, and then in the fewest words possible. It was just one of the many curious things about the small man, and the familiarity of it helped her to relax. He'd left behind his Anbu mask, both of them going bare faced in an attempt to adapt to new lives outside of the Foundation.

"Ready," she answered, nodding shortly. With a small grunt of approval he started off, adopting an easy, loping pace that would gain speed once they cleared the village and hit the open desert. Two teams of Suna black ops had left before them, at Gaara's insistence, though they themselves were traveling as just a pair, at Hitori's insistence. Her desire to do something to help Nisei had very nearly caused another argument between them, but Gaara had suddenly backed down and acquiesced to her request go out searching for the Anbu Captain.

Kankurou watched his brother out of the corner of his eye as Hitori and Yomi started out, noticing the twitch of Gaara's shoulders. He'd been surprised by the redhead's actions earlier, though compromise was something he needed to learn, even if it wasn't going to be easy on him. Gaara was worried about letting her go with Ruka out there somewhere, hunting her, and Kankurou didn't blame him. He kept waiting for the order to join them, or to follow, shifting nervously when he began to think it wasn't coming.

'She will be fine,' Gaara kept insisting to himself, as they slowly moved further away. It had been hard to keep from arguing with her, but somehow he'd managed to do it. The tenuous understanding between them was too fragile to disrupt, no matter how worried he was. And he was definitely very worried. Hitori's concern for Nisei had pushed aside the threat of Danzou's assassination order, and that left her vulnerable. "It's difficult," he sighed, turning slowly towards his brother, "to accept being so powerless."

The puppet user tensed, knowing exactly what Gaara meant, in spite of the odd way he phrased it. "You could've ordered her to take some black ops with her, instead of just Yomi-" he began, but stopped when his brother started shaking his head.

"I won't order her to do anything. Letting her go like this is the only way I can show her that I don't want to be her master." Troubled turquoise eyes gazed up at the sky, as if searching for answers in the tiny wisps of clouds floating overhead. "I want her to be my equal."

"Gaara and Hitori, not the Kazekage and the Anbu." Kankurou said softly, smiling a little when Gaara turned his eyes back to his brother and nodded. "Well," he glanced away, trying to keep his face straight, "no one gave me any orders at all, so I think I'll just... Start my own search, ne?" With a sly grin, he darted off in the direction the two Anbu had gone, easily following their light tracks in the sand.

Smiling to himself, Gaara returned to his office, trying to ignore the hollow emptiness it seemed to hold now, with almost everyone gone. The piles of paperwork on his desk would be a poor distraction from his thoughts, but they weren't going to take care of themselves, either. Luckily, they managed to magically replenish themselves every day, and he'd be able to keep busy for as long as it took the three of them to return. At least, until it was time for him to sleep. He wasn't quite sure how he was going to avoid staring at the ceiling with worry gnawing away at him all night, but he would figure that out when the time came. It would most likely be at least a couple of days before he heard anything, at all.

Yomi's thoughts were all over the place as soon as they were away from Suna and running full out. Both were aware that Kankurou was following behind them, but neither stopped to acknowledge it, choosing instead to remain focused on their surroundings, and the task before them. Thanks to the letters, they knew the location where Nisei had presumably fought Ruka and then disappeared from, and though several Anbu teams had already been over the area, it was probably the best place to start. Just getting there would take the better part of a day, even if they maintained their current pace.

In spite of her worries about Nisei, Hitori found her mind wandering back to the conversation that occurred after Yomi shared his news. It was obvious, even to her, that Gaara's initial reaction to her words was very different from the eventual outcome. She'd watched his face carefully as she spoke, noticing the change once she said that she felt she owed Nisei a debt. His eyes had lowered before he nodded his head once, then softly said he'd see to it that she had everything she might require to accomplish her task. It felt good to be given the chance to make her own choice, though the worry he couldn't hide weighed heavily on her.

"Keep your mind on business, Hitori." Yomi snapped at her as he moved a little further ahead. "Coming back to him in one piece is the best way to repay him."

Hitori nodded as she quickened her pace to catch up. Yomi was right, of course. Right now she needed to worry about what they might run into. Setting out like this was dangerous with Ruka out on the hunt. She hadn't forgotten about him, it was impossible to. He crouched in the back of her mind like a spider waiting for a fly to land in it's web.

Kankurou maintained the easy distance between them, following the pair through mile after mile of sand, dotted here and there with rocky outcroppings and the occasional greenery of a nearby oasis. It was at the last oasis before the border with Konoha that he finally caught up, slowing to a brisk walk as he came up behind them, the sun a blood colored disc hanging low in the sky. The two Anbu stood near the water, their heads together and hands moving in short, sharp gestures, almost as if they were arguing. Curious, Kankurou moved closer, and paused as they both turned to regard him with serious faces.

"Did you notice anything strange when you walked up?" Yomi asked quietly, his narrowed eyes scanning around and glinting oddly in the eerie purple of twilight.

"Like what?" The question caught him off guard, and he nearly jumped when Hitori's small hand settled softly on his arm.

"Behind you. To the left, in that clump of rocks near the palm tree." Her voice was low, and her calm face belied the urgent tone of her words. "Two, maybe three."

"I'm.." Kankurou began, but Yomi cut him off abruptly.

"Behind you, as well. Three, in the stand of trees." He sighed softly, turning to lean over the pool of water and splash some on his face. "On my mark." The redhead nodded, her grip on Kankurou's sleeve tightening as she turned to him.

"Hitori..." Kankurou frowned, trying to resist the urge to fold his arms over his chest, or shake the girl. Could these two be any more cryptic?

"Ambush. Five that we've seen, and probably more we haven't. Be prepared." Crouching down, she seemed to be adjusting her clothing. "On Yomi's mark." Kankurou tried to hide the look of surprise on his face, but it made their stop at the oasis a little easier to understand. If you were about to be attacked by a group larger than your own, it made sense to at least try to take back a little of the advantage by choosing the ground you'd fight on.

"Mark," Yomi muttered, drawing his ninjato as he ran full out, straight at Hitori. She remained crouched, not even watching him, only moving at the last minute to lace her fingers together before catching Yomi's foot and thrusting her arms up. This act resulted in the tiny Anbu flying through the air, directly into the small stand of trees behind Hitori. A startled shout rose at his landing, and Kankurou darted after him, barely seeing Hitori who moved past him in the opposite direction, a deadly blur heading for the pile of rocks, her tanto gleaming wickedly in her hand.

A short scream sounded as Kankurou pulled his scrolls out and spread them on the ground before him. It would be a new experience to battle alongside close range fighters, and the puppet user was always up for a new experience. Hitori was on top of the rocks now, blood dripping thickly from her short blade, drops flying as she reversed it in a graceful, downward arc before leaping lightly to the ground on the other side. He didn't like her being out of sight, but obviously she could take care of herself.

Yomi reappeared a moment later, grinning as he ran into the open, two ninja completely shrouded in black, hot on his heels. The one closest to the Anbu darted to the side, but the second, slower one, wasn't so lucky. With a smirk, Kankurou watched as his newest puppet wrapped the man in a deadly embrace, dozens of blades sinking deeply into his flesh. Yomi had already met the other ninja, their weapons blurring as they fought, the rogue being slowly driven back by Yomi's superior skill. Kankurou was almost amazed at just how good the diminutive Anbu really was.

Hitori yanked her blade from the chest of the last ninja and jumped back up onto the pile of rocks again, just in time to see Yomi viciously slicing through the neck of the man in front of him, nearly removing his head. She moved to leap down and rejoin them, when the air seemed to explode with sound, and suddenly a line of at least eight black clad men formed between her and her companions. Her eyes narrowed as she dropped into a defensive crouch, scanning the entire area around her. Movement at the corner of her eye caught her attention, and she reacted - dodging to the left, but not quickly enough. Steel sliced cleanly through the short sleeve over her right arm, biting deep into the flesh as it gouged through the center of her Anbu tattoo.

"You don't have the right to wear that anymore." She turned slowly towards the deep voice, her left hand pressed tightly over the wound in her arm. The tora mask over his face was unique and unmistakable, commissioned specifically for him by Danzou himself - The Tiger, Danzou's claw.

Ruka had found her.

--------

It was late in the evening, and the tea had long since gone cold on the table beside Nisei. She found herself having a difficult time reaching out for it, or even attempting to conjure up an appetite for anything that Jun tried to feed her. The only thing that seemed likely to do her any good now, would have to be sleep, as Jun presented before he stepped outside to keep watch from the small extended porch. She could smell the tobacco he was enjoying, the light colored smoke wafting delicately through the window above her head. What was he looking out for, waiting for?

The thought hadn't occurred to her that an enemy might be coming for her. Certainly, Ruka would think she was dead, resting at the bottom of the river somewhere, and there was no one else with a reason to harm her. With a hint of annoyance, she glanced away from the window and tried with great effort to shift even slightly towards the cup filled with cold tea. There was always something waiting, or someone waiting. She had been waiting for the moment when Kakashi would acknowledge her, only to find herself fighting it hard. It was the stubborn blood that she couldn't ignore.

A part of her had just wanted to forget, and now she wanted to forgive more than anything. After being faced with death, a part of her felt empty, like there was nothing there to begin with, and only now was she given the chance to fix it. Either way, she would have to try. Ashamed, she missed the Jonin, and his face had appeared to her many times within the past five minutes. All throughout the important years of her life, he had influenced her.

'He wasn't supposed to have power,' Nisei sighed to herself, letting the truth run through her, and trying hard not to fight it. It _was_ the truth. As much as Kakashi seemed oblivious to it, he had control over everything. It was a scary thought. The will to move, he controlled. The strength to breathe, he controlled. The heart beating within her chest, was his to control. Even though she had finally accepted it, if she told him these things, she was afraid of what it might mean.

In her letter, Nisei had stated that perhaps they couldn't love. That was also the truth. For so very long, she'd felt like she wouldn't ever be able to love. But that was when Kakashi was out of the picture. Somehow, it was still the truth, even with him right in front of her. She needed to reach out to him, which was something she was still terrified of doing. Just the thought of taking that action caused the girl to freeze up, and dig her nails into the mattress.

She had to move. She couldn't bear to lie still with her thoughts any longer. Pain shot up through her arms and legs as she scooted herself against the wall behind the bed. She gently laid her head back and attempted to move both legs. It seemed absurd to her, the fact that she wasn't able to handle at least this much. Tears swelled in her eyes as she gritted her teeth, realizing she had only gotten her left leg off of the bed. When the time came to move the right one, she was crying.

Continuing on to Suna seemed like the least logical thing to do, and yet it felt like the only thing she could do. She had to stop whatever was going to happen. Ruka must've waited for Konoha's preemptive strike. Now that he'd had a taste of it, he'd probably taken advantage of the opportunity to move more freely, and headed straight in that direction. But what if he hadn't? Her mind felt obscured, clouded with many things that she couldn't seem to focus on.

With a shaking hand, she gripped the cup and brought it to her parched lips. At the first touch of the cool liquid running down her throat, she found herself with both hands cradling the cup, drinking all that was left. The bandages wrapped around her were like restraints, and she cursed them the entire way to the open door. Jun was still sitting there, like he had been for the past few hours. He didn't look at her, just gave a slight nod.

"It's nice to see that you're up and moving around. Are you sure that's wise?" He asked, while continuing to slide his knife over the thick piece of wood in his hand. He was carving something, and from the various statues of animals around his small cabin, she had a sense of what it was likely to be.

He was right, though Nisei wouldn't admit it. She definitely shouldn't be moving yet. The fact that she had forced herself up, was nothing short of a miracle. "Do you mind telling me what it is that you're waiting for?"

Jun smiled then, his face breaking into many deep wrinkles. "There are many ninja roaming. It seems that the guy you were trying to catch has some friends."

That was it. She pulled at the light clothing. "I need my clothes, I need... something. I need to go."

"Are you insane?" Jun rose from the chair he had been sitting in, straightening to his full height of a few inches taller than her, and stared hard. "If you think I'm just going to let you roam around out there, in the middle of the night, in the shape that you're in... Then you must be insane."

"My village thinks I'm dead and the guy who hurt me is after someone I care about." She cared for Hitori? With a hand resting against her head, she glared right back. "If you don't let me leave, then I will be forced to do something that you won't really like, old man."

He chuckled, "Oh?"

What was _she_ waiting for?

Pakkun landed on a large rock as they came into the clearing, and Kakashi followed, his feet lightly touching down on the ground. He could sense it too, the feeling of someone else's chakra. The scent was obscured, and there were definitely more than three. What the Jonin would give to have one from the Inuzuka clan with him right now. Hell, he would have accepted Kiba, seeing as how he was starting to surpass even the ninken in a few sensatory ways.

"We're not alone," the dog said, tilting his head curiously as he pounced from the rock to the ground - sniffing along the many tracks. He turned his head to look at Kakashi, who in turn was starting to look around for all possible ambush openings. Pakkun's voice dropped low, unable to mistake it, "I smell Nisei..."

For a moment, a small light had broken through the seemingly daunting night that had shrouded the Jonin constantly, up until now. The thought of finding Nisei relieved him, his shoulders slowly dropping. Hopefully, he could relax a little now. She would be found, that he was certain of, but the condition she might be found in, was what bothered him the most.

"Of course you smell Nisei..." Coming out of the woods were familiar Anbu colors, and that unmistakable bird mask and blond bright hair. In Kouki's hands was the jacket that Nisei would always wear. Within the first few seconds, Kakashi gathered that Kouki brought it with him, but couldn't imagine why. All it had done was further irritate Kakashi beyond a level he thought he could ever find himself experiencing. It was an altogether unpleasant sensation.

Pakkun let out a frustrated sigh. They had been searching the area for hours. Not only that, but the coat could be the reason why they hadn't found anything. "Where did you find that?"

"I didn't 'find' it. I brought the coat with me." His team of three were nothing like Naruto, Sakura, and Sai. They all looked frightfully serious, and very fitting to the Anbu ways, if you were to start off young. One of them seemed to be missing, but that didn't matter at the moment. 'The lack of emotion in kids these days,' the Jonin thought as he grimaced. The more Kouki spoke, the less Kakashi felt the urge to act as nicely as he usually did towards others he had a particular dislike for.

And yet, poor Kouki hadn't done anything but challenge him.

Kakashi crossed the distance between them, showing the other that he was in no way amused by his actions or superior attitude. "You're impeding my investigation. My dogs could've found her with ease, but now I wonder if it's possible at all." The icy tone of his voice left none of his displeasure hidden.

"This team could have used someone from the Inuzuka line," Kouki remarked neutrally, while crossing his arms over his chest. Kakashi had been thinking that same thing earlier, and that their thoughts ran in the same direction bothered him. How alike were they really? Perhaps it was an irrational irritation, but that didn't make it any less real, or lessen the intensity of the feeling."Anyway, I suppose you're right. You did summon ninken and they are very good at what they do."

"Very," Kakashi agreed, as he shouldered his way past the blond and walked deeper into the forest. Of course, Kouki followed him, like a hunting cat sensing weakened prey.

"I highly doubt Nisei wants to see you." Kakashi paused at the other's words, and turned towards him with a skeptical eye. What was it that caused the Anbu to need to constantly get a word in that would just annoy Kakashi than anything. "That's why she left you a letter instead of telling you personally, ne?"

"What is it that you're trying to get at, Kouki-kun?" His patience had already worn thinner than he could ever remember it being, yet somehow he still managed to exude calm.

The Anbu held back the smile that was just begging to come out. "Let me find Nisei. It would be best for you to return home, lie there in bed, and cause no more worry for the Hokage. Besides, Nisei would be torn if she knew that you went this distance, in your condition and all."

"You're playing a child's game," Kakashi murmured as he turned away to continue walking. Within a flash, he felt the breeze shift, looking up to find Kouki now in front of him.

"It's a man's game." For once, the Jonin was glad that the Anbu mutts were far behind their master, as he fisted his hands in Kouki's vest and shoved him roughly against the nearest tree. A man's game. Kakashi's eye narrowed and he could feel the other man trembling slightly, anger mingled with something else, something that Kakashi didn't want to dare identify. Kouki and Kakashi did have one thing in common. They both loved Nisei.

"Nisei's heart isn't a game." He shoved Kouki once more to add emphasis. The action also felt good, he had to admit to himself. "And it never was. I understand that I made a mistake, as we all do. It was a big mistake and I'm trying to fix it. I won't let anything come between us during this time. If you want to make it a game, then you've lost before you ever got a chance to play, because she's mine. She's mine already. You know it," he gave Kouki another little shake as his one visible eye narrowed at the Anbu, "and so do I."

Kakashi let him go, his fingers loosening their hold on the Anbu suddenly. He sputtered a mouthful of claims and yet, he didn't have the nerve to take them back. He meant every single one of them. They weren't lies. He knew it was all true, and from the way Kouki's eyes remained widened, the Anbu knew it as well. Kouki wouldn't give up though, the Jonin was painfully aware. People like them didn't give up on the things they loved. They had to have them stripped away by force.

As they stared at each other, the two men seemed to grow further apart. Nisei. A small and fragile girl, who tried without struggling to defeat her past. Right now, Kakashi and Kouki, were both past and future. It only made sense that Nisei would choose Kouki. It was the choice that Nisei should have made long ago, but sadly, for some people the past conquers the future. Kakashi, with an almost childlike, selfish glee, wanted to show it off. He envisioned it waving like a white flag drenched in black in front of Kouki's eyes.

Kouki moved slowly from his spot against the tree, seeing Pakkun there. "I'll get rid of the coat." Without acknowledging Kakashi again, he stalked off through the trees, his tensed body radiating frustration and anger into the air around him.

The dog gave a small nod and waited for the Anbu to leave, before regarding Kakashi critically. The older man stumbled into the opposite tree and stared at where Kouki's body had been slammed just moments prior. He was feeling the strain on his body already. Perhaps coming to Nisei's rescue while team 'asshole' was doing such a fantastic job at failure wasn't the best idea. He wouldn't regret it, he wouldn't regret anything about searching for Nisei, but the fact that Kouki really was a worthy rival to him was an annoyance he hated having rubbed in his face.

"Kakashi," Pakkun was nearly growling at the realization that the Jonin was in no condition to be out of bed. He had done such a good job at concealing it, until now.

"Great," The Jonin glanced up at the voice that irritated him so much to see Kouki and his team walking towards them. "Minase and Hikaru spotted the three men that were following us earlier, except now there are more of them."

"Rogues?" Kakashi already had himself pulled together, going back to a more neutral tone in the face of a possible threat, standing up straight, and sliding his hand inside his pocket. He would never admit how much of an effort it had been for him to do just that much.

"I'm assuming. They're all dressed in black though, as if they're part of a clan." Neither needed to question their choices, or the plan of action to come. It was their job to get rid of these types of ninja, so hiding and avoiding would be useless. In the end, they would end up fighting, though Kakashi had hoped it wouldn't come to that. It seemed a useless wish, now.

Pakkun released a sigh, more about the fact that Kakashi would be weaker than usual than the impending battle. "Ruka's new friends?"

Kouki nodded as his blue eyes glinted like ice. He was positive that's exactly who they were. "You know it."

Fighting was the only option left.

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End of chapter. Thanks for reading!


	17. 幸福の旅路 Heroes

Author's Note: As always, we send out an enormous thank you for the hits and reviews! Hope you enjoy the latest chapter!

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Moon's Light, Reality's Dream  
月の光、うつつの夢  
Chapter Sixteen - 幸福の旅路 (_Heroes_)

目が覚め夜が終わらなくても そこに輝く星が無くても  
_Even if you awaken before the night has come to an end, and there are no stars shining,_  
十分な程見て来れたから  
_Just getting to see them should be more than enough. _

In the end, it didn't take Nisei too long to convince Jun that she would be leaving, one way or another. The old man stopped arguing against her request eventually, but continued to stubbornly insist that she couldn't wear her ruined Anbu uniform. He was adamant that she keep the kimono he'd dressed her in. It was short and silky, made of a very comfortable, loose fabric, and definitely not a typical kimono. Deciding this was one battle she could afford to lose, she thanked him for the shorts he handed her and quickly slipped on her sandals. The rest of her body seemed to be covered in white bandages, so the exposure of her skin wasn't a concern. Outside of rare situation, she would never find herself in this type of clothing.

She'd dedicated her life to a different path.

Even as she began to slowly walk away, Nisei started to pick up on chakra nearby. It was small, and different from other chakra, but she found herself pulling out the katana on her back, anyway. Whatever it was, she would be ready for it. Branches whipped aside, the movements delicate, yet revealing. Whoever it was, they weren't trying to hide, which eased her nerves, but the fast approach was enough to keep her alert. In spite of her heightened level of awareness, she was still surprised when the bushes before her suddenly parted, revealing the sources of the chakra as they pounced.

"Bisuke... Akino..." Nisei crouched carefully to her knees, relieved as she looked at the two canines. She reached her hand out and gently rested her palm on the top of the bespectacled ninken's head, and smiled at them both. "Guh, you have no idea how happy I am to see you two."

The light haired dog beamed back at her with droopy dark circled eyes, the rings matching the color of the kanji imprinted on the top of his head, which read 'shinobi'. "It's good to know that you're alive. Kakashi and the others have been looking for you. We must return to them. Their chakra has been disturbed."

"Disturbed?" Nisei asked, as her expression became worried. "Kakashi...He's in no condition to-"

"We know that. We could sense it, as well as see it. We _are_ ninken." She gave a firm nod as she rose slowly to her feet and willed herself to not mind the pain. It was easy to ignore for the moment, as she looked towards the opening between the trees. A path that would lead towards the river, she realized when the tang of salt hit her nose. Bisuke and Akino would surely know the way back to their summoner.

"We have to hurry, then," the Anbu said while replacing her sword behind her back. The two ninken turned and started to head off in the direction of the river. "Jun said there were ninja surrounding the area. We should try to avoid them."

Bisuke glanced back at her. "You're in no condition to be fighting either, Nisei-san. We will do our best to find the safest route, and to avoid all chances of encountering battle while bringing you to Kakashi." His eyes returned to the path before him. "Try to keep up, unless you want Buru to carry you the rest of the way."

She couldn't tell if that was meant to be funny or not. Kakashi's dogs weren't known for being humorous, though Bisuke's lazy expression definitely reminded her of someone. She rolled her eyes a moment before they leaped in unison, moving through the forest as they pushed off each branch. The silence surrounding them was chilling, especially with the weird feeling coming from up ahead. This forest exuded a sense of ill omen, and shadows behind every tree caused a nerve wracking wave to spread throughout her body.

It was less the possibility of enemy encounters that had her so tense, and more the reality of seeing Kakashi again. The things she'd said in the letter were open to being questioned when she returned. Her condition, the cuts and bandages - she was certain she looked terrible. She wondered if his resolve would break. The Jonin didn't have to see her in this condition, though she was sure that he would find some sort of smug irony in the situation. He was the one hurting before, and at her mercy, and now it was her turn to be taken care of. At any moment, she felt like she could drop into unconsciousness, only her will keeping her on her feet and moving. Her chakra was still no larger than that of the dogs in front of her.

They were strong hounds, without a doubt, but a human had a larger potential capacity of chakra, and hers was already failing. It reminded her of a candle that was guttering in a gentle breeze, constantly fighting to hold the flame. This was the closest that she had ever been to death, and it was also the most pain that she had ever experienced. It only encouraged her to get to Hitori quickly, no matter what the costs to herself. She wouldn't let anyone else be forced to live through this anguish.

"It's not too much further, now." Bisuke's voice pulled her out of her wandering thoughts, and she looked ahead with a determined expression. "Not with the route that we took, though I see why it was so difficult to find you. That tiny cabin was well hidden. This 'Jun' you speak of is a very clever old man."

_"Look, Nisei... I know you want to go out there and fight. I know that you're scared after that close encounter, but you have to play it safe. You can't just rush off like this, in your condition!"_

_"I think I understand you a little bit better now." Nisei rested both of her hands upon the man's shoulders and looked at him hard, as if looking through him. "I'm sorry about what happened to your daughter." Her gaze lowered to the floor as the carved piece of wood fell from his limp fingers, the rose to meet his again. "She must've really liked animals, huh?"_

_"How could you tell that just by..." Slowly, he shook his head, having to break eye contact with her. Jun reached down to pick up the figure, but it was Nisei's pale hand that brought it up from the floor._

_She held it carefully against her chest. "I'm sorry, but I'm afraid that I'm going to keep this one. Thank you for your help." She smiled back at him, before her face grew more serious. "You saved my life."_

"He was a good person," Nisei said, more to herself than to the ninken. Bisuke watched her closely, and he could tell that those words were personal. She was referring to the man who found and saved her, after all. He'd done quite well for someone who wasn't a healer, or practiced in medicine. The precise bandages and the obviously improved condition Nisei was in now, were proof of the great care she'd been treated with.

"Minase!" Hikaru yelled, as she released a fistful of the enemy's clothing and retrieved a kunai from her pocket. Surrounding the team of five shinobi were nearly a dozen enemies. The coppery smell blood filled the air, and the sharp sound of metal grating against metal was loud in their ears. The battle had begun only a short time before, and already the young Anbu found themselves in a bind.

The weakest, the medical ninja, was nearly frozen by shock. Minase's trembling fingers cut shakily into an enemy as her scared, wide eyes tried to remain focused. Eventually, her legs gave out at what ended up being an appropriate moment, the enemy's blade just cutting through the space her head had occupied only seconds before. Hikaru was barely a step behind, pulling Minase's attacker backwards by his shirt and directly onto her blade.

"Hikaru..." Minase whimpered, as she slowly raised her eyes to her partner. The girl had been cut in several places. Hikaru's arm wound around the other Anbu's waist as she brought the medic up to her feet, then rushed her towards a seemingly safe area. Within seconds she'd eased Minase down against a tree, and set to work, tearing away the sleeve of her shirt where blood was flowing freely.

"Don't talk..." she scolded, as she took the kit out of her pack and started hastily binding the deep gash. Minase was paling, her brow creased with the onset of a fever. Hikaru's head snapped back, watching as the Anbu captain and Jonin fought tenaciously, leaving blurred shadows with their speed. Both men were deliberate with each strike, as if proving something to the other. And though neither would ever admit it, they worked very well together, their similarities giving them the ability to accurately predict each other's movements. This situation was bigger than any battle, and Hikaru grew more nervous, finally calling out to her Captain, "Kouki senpai!"

Within an instant, the blond had broken away from battle to regard his team. Hikaru came to her feet, and they both looked at the injured medical Anbu. What would have to happen now wasn't a mystery, or even a choice, really. They had taken out many of the rogues together, narrowing it down to only four left, two of whom were not occupied by Pakkun and Kakashi. As much as Kouki was reluctant to leave the scene, the safety of his team was a responsibility that left him no choice.

"We have to get her back to Konoha immediately. She's bleeding too heavily for self-healing," Kouki growled in a rush as he looked over at the Jonin, who was now throwing kunai to counter the enemy's attacks. The enemy ninja were experienced, but in the end, Kakashi would have the situation won. It didn't feel entirely wrong to leave the Copy ninja alone. "Kakashi, I must leave at this time, but I want you to know that this battle isn't over!"

"Looking forward to it," Kakashi called back almost casually, his fingers twirling a kunai as he lunged towards the enemy he'd been squaring off with for the past few minutes. Once he was sure that Team Kouki was gone, he let himself drop to one knee. His tired arms blocked the next strike as he gripped the ninja's wrist and their kunai clashed, the metal giving off a violent shrieking sound.

The amount of effort put into fighting the seemingly endless number of rogues was starting to wear the Jonin down. Twelve very experienced men, and they seemed nothing like even the strongest ninja Kakashi had faced in the past, yet he was having trouble keeping up with them. Or perhaps this was simply what being exhausted felt like. It was hard to think, to move, or even act to save his own life, now. These thoughts had risen the moment he didn't feel the need to keep up with the elite Anbu any longer. Kakashi wasn't easily taken down, he was, in fact, feared and most rogues were smart enough to run from even the whisper of his presence... until now.

What would happen if he should fail... ? As much as he didn't want to think about that outcome, his body was constantly reminding him of the current limits of his strength. He couldn't carry on battling like this, and if Nisei was out there, there would only be more ninja, since they seemed to be swarming the area in rapidly increasing numbers. This was the second wave of rogues they'd faced. Kakashi began to wonder if Ruka had somehow formed an alliance and brought an army with him, just to occupy Konoha in order to ease his passage to Suna.

It was an unhealthy obsession, to hunt down your old student intent on murdering them. Danzou was a shady character, but this was beyond right and wrong. There was no reason to give out such drastic orders, and for Ruka to willingly, even eagerly, go along with it - what kind of a person did that make him? Tsunade had sent Nisei out by herself to look for someone like that? Kakashi's mind grew more angered the more he thought about it. Nisei was most likely dead due to these careless decisions, and he had been lying uselessly in bed while all of this was happening.

He could have stopped it, if he'd been aware of the situation before it reached this point. This entire time, he'd been clueless to everything that was going on around him. It was just like before, so many years ago. Whenever he cared for someone, or made it his responsibility to protect their lives, they always wound up dead. Obito, Rin, and now, Nisei. He could feel his resolve slowly crumbling, as the muscles in his arms twitched and he thought of allowing them to finally just rest. Even if he would never want to stop searching, even if he made promises, it's not like he could realistically keep them.

"Watch out!" Pakkun shouted in warning, as another ninja came up beside them and withdrew his sword, fully intending to strike the Jonin down while he was apparently weakened and at a stand off with the rogue he was engaging. The pug released the enemy he'd been tearing at to latch onto the man already locked in battle with his master, forcing the enemy to drop his kunai, and giving Kakashi enough time to duck out of the way of the descending sword, before ending the trapped rogue's life with a swift jab of the heavy dagger in his hand.

At this point, nothing was keeping the newest attacker from ending Kakashi's life with a swift reversing stroke of his blade. The Jonin waited for it, his eyes closed tightly. Instead, metal met metal with a loud screech of steel blades grinding together. His hands dropped to the forest floor as he looked up, shaking weakly from the realization that death had been less than a breath away, to see Nisei there with her katana out - blocking the enemy's blade inches from Kakashi. She turned the rogue's arm back with the force of her swing, then moved quickly to impale him on the steel in her hand before he could recover his stance. Finished, the Anbu finally looked back, her golden eyes glaring at Kakashi as if scolding him. By that time, Akino and Bisuke had joined Pakkun to finish off the remaining rogue, easily defeating him.

"How careless..." Nisei murmured, as her voice shook audibly. Her chest heaved with the effort of holding back the desire to cry as she brought her arm up, wiping at a few escaping tears with her sleeve and bandages. "You left your bed for this? You just couldn't do as you were told, could you? You're an idiot! And you never-" She didn't have time to finish before she felt a strong arm go around her waist. Nisei gasped out in pain, crying easily now. She hadn't noticed that he'd regained his feet. They stood there together, and the rain continued its angry downpour.

"You're alive..." She could feel his short nails digging into her back, he was holding her so tightly. The light brush of his breath caused her body to wrack with chills. It was difficult, and painful, but she did her best to wrap his arms around him in return. The weakness of her body was evident, she thought, as she tried to make an excuse for her vulnerability. She let her head rest gently against his chest, his fingers sinking into her hair as he carefully pulled back enough to look at her.

"Of course I'm alive." She let her hands slide down along his back as she trembled from the tears she could no longer contain, and the unavoidable chill in the damp air.

Wordlessly, he leaned down and pressed his mouth against the top of her forehead. She could feel his lips brushing against her skin as he spoke lowly to her, "I don't know what I would have done if it had been true, Nisei. I don't think I could bear another person close to me dying, especially if it's something I could have prevented. I was scared."

"I'm here." No matter how many times she tried to convince him, she knew that it would always be somewhat impossible to succeed. He slid his hands along her neck to rest against the sides of her face, searching her golden eyes with his own before pulling her body to his again, and listening for the acute beating of her heart. There it was - strong, steady, and just as reassuring as he needed it to be.

Kakashi admitting to fear was something that she never thought she would hear. His body was weak, but he somehow still managed to be the person in control, now. He had to be, for himself and for her sake, because physically, she was still worse off than he was. He pulled away after long moments of simply holding her, feeling her heart beating against his own, and being reassured that she was indeed real, warm, and alive in his arms. After hearing that someone has vanished, and is most likely dead, hope could be a difficult thing to conjure up, even if you refuse to consciously acknowledge the possibility of death.

He kneeled down into a crouched position, waiting patiently as the girl slid her arms around his neck, then leaned forward to rest against his back. "It's time to get back to Konoha."

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Dimly, Hitori could hear Yomi shouting and the clash of steel, but those noises became distant as everything narrowed down to the battle she was now facing, for her very life.

"Ruka sama," she said softly, removing her hand from her wound as her grip tightened on her tanto. Blood began running freely down her arm again, but she ignored it, taking herself back through her training sessions with this man, letting every detail she could remember work its way into her thoughts. An image of turquoise eyes flashed briefly in her mind, and then she was moving, her weapon held ready. They circled each other warily as the sounds of the fighting around them only intensified.

Yomi saw red the moment Ruka appeared behind Hitori, but the other man had already attacked before he could force out any sound. The ninja in front of him weren't moving, merely standing still, their sole purpose to keep Yomi and Kankurou separated from Hitori while she faced Ruka. The tiny Anbu decided he'd had enough of this game, baring his teeth as he darted forward, leading with his weapon and ripping it through the first body he encountered, ignoring the blood that sprayed over him in a grisly fountain. Rational thought fled, replaced by the need to kill, and to keep killing until he could get to Hitori. Nothing else mattered.

Kankurou found himself locked in hand to hand combat with the ninja nearest to him, swearing softly to himself as the man scored a minor hit against his shoulder. "That fucking hurt, you jackass!" he yelled as he plunged a kunai into the man's neck. Nodding in satisfaction, he turned his attention back to his puppets, but was attacked again before he could even think clearly. "Yomi, these assholes are really starting to piss me off!" Growling a little, he kicked his latest attacker in the knee, temporarily disabling him. Yomi suddenly appeared behind the unfortunate rogue and stabbed his ninjato into the base of the man's skull, grinning in a frightening way as the body collapsed to twitch before him on the ground.

Ruka blinked in surprise over Hitori's shoulder, seeing all of his men down, and an enraged, blood drenched Yomi advancing towards them. "Perhaps now isn't the best time and place for us to meet, Hitori. Your little friends spoil the atmosphere." He took a few steps backwards, raising his hand up in some sort of signal before turning to depart. "Next time, I'll make sure it's just the two of us, ne?"

Hitori opened her mouth to reply, raising her weapon a little. She started to move towards him, intending to end this farce here and now, but he was gone, and she found herself facing several more of the black clad figures instead.

Kankurou groaned loudly. "They're like fucking cockroaches! Where the hell do you guys keep coming from?" He moved back a little, glad to be able to bring his puppets back into the battle finally, but still muttering under his breath as he manipulated them in a deadly dance through the multiplied enemy ninja.

Yomi practically roared with rage as Ruka ran off, his eyes narrowing as he started ripping into the rogues who moved to surround him, each slash of his blade, each step, bringing him closer to where Hitori was fighting.

They pressed closer to her even though she turned and slashed, her weapon taking down men that only seemed to be replaced by more the moment they fell. Blood still ran freely from the deep wound Ruka had given her, and she moved a little slower with every passing second. She missed a block and took a stinging blow against her left hip, turning slightly to reduce the damage. The movement caused her to stumble a little, and she fell to one knee, waiting for her mistake to cost her. Instead of the cold kiss of steel, she felt a soft hand on her shoulder, and glanced up in surprise.

"Are you okay?" He smiled brightly at her, his neko mask pushed to the side of his head, and pale blue eyes curving up just a little. At his feet, her three remaining attackers lay dead, each with a kunai protruding from his throat.

"Ibuki? What the fuck are you doing here?" Yomi sounded furious as he stormed over to them, leaning down to wipe his blade on the shirt of one of the downed ninja.

Ibuki held a hand down to Hitori, pulling her up after she hesitantly took it, a worried frown marring his pretty face when he spotted the wound on her arm. "That looks terrible. I'd better get you bandaged up before you lose any more blood, ne?" He pulled a roll of gauze out of the bag at his hip and started winding the white material tightly around her arm. "I'm happy to see you, too, Yomi kun. Kouki sent me, of course. He thought I might be useful to you."

Kankurou just stared, his mouth hanging slightly open as he wondered if this new Anbu was even stranger than Yomi. He'd certainly never seen anyone who looked quite like that before. His eyes roamed slowly over the newcomer, taking in the almost obscenely small black shorts and half-shirt, the Anbu armor that seemed to suit him perfectly, and the wild, spiked black and red hair that looked like nothing more than a mess, and yet was somehow the most flattering frame for his girlishly pretty face. The porcelain neko mask casually pushed to the side of his head only added to the overall impression of flawlessness. Maybe everyone in Konoha was a little off. That might explain it.

"Useful, my ass! What the hell is the meaning of you charging in here and playing the fucking hero?" He shrugged off the hand Kankurou rested on his shoulder and stalked over to the water, muttering to himself under his breath. Rolling his eyes, Kankurou followed, waiting until Yomi was at the water's edge before grabbing a handful of the back of his shirt and tossing him in. Spluttering as he broke the surface, Yomi stood up, looking just a little like a drowned rat. "I suppose I needed that," he admitted quietly, before grinning slightly. "On the plus side, I'm cleaner now. Though," he glanced to the darkened sky and frowned a little again. "I'm gonna freeze my ass off on the run back."

Kankurou barely managed to keep himself from laughing as he watched Yomi wringing water out of his clothes as best he could while still wearing them. He glanced to the sky, noting the position of the rising moon. "Speaking of, we should probably return soon... ?"

Yomi nodded as he walked over to stand on Hitori's other side as Ibuki finished tying the bandage around her arm. "We're heading back to Suna." He patted her softly on her uninjured shoulder, trying hard not to glare as Ibuki smiled at him. "Are you coming with us, neko boy?"

"Those are my orders," he answered cheerfully, leaning over to pick up Hitori's tanto, then handing it to her hilt first with a dazzling smile. "How are you feeling, senpai?"

"I'm fine, thank you," she answered, sliding her weapon into the sheath on her back before turning to Yomi. "Heading back sounds like a good idea. I'm ready whenever you guys are."

"Right. Let's go then," Yomi said, shaking himself rather like a dog to get rid of a few more drops of water. "I'll be right behind you, Hitori chan." He smiled a little as she nodded and darted off, frowning slightly as Ibuki followed close behind her, catching up quickly to run beside her. Kankurou kept pace with Yomi, a few yards behind the other two. "He's my friend, but he irritates me to no end sometimes."

Kankurou raised an eyebrow at the tiny Anbu. "Oh? Why is that?"

"Because perfect threw up all over him, and he knows it." Yomi muttered gloomily, his teeth already starting to chatter as the temperature plummeted swiftly.

Kankurou decided it was best to refrain from replying to that, turning his attention to Hitori, instead, watching her for any signs of distress. She'd lost a lot of blood from the cut on her arm, and he didn't want her pushing herself. Gaara would probably skin him alive if anything worse happened to her.

The miles flew by in silence as the night deepened around them. At some point, Yomi started sneezing loudly and swearing softly under his breath. Hitori concentrated on running, pushing past the fatigue that was trying to drag her down. Ibuki remained quietly at her side, not too close to her, but never far away, either. Kankurou wanted nothing more than to collapse on his bed and sleep for a week, and he sighed happily when the walls of Suna finally loomed before them.

The sun was just peeking over the horizon as they passed through the doors. One of the guards had seen them coming and darted off as they approached, presumably to inform the Kazekage of their return. Hitori tried to calm her ragged breathing, but it was impossible. At this point, it was a battle just to stay on her feet, though she managed not to give any outward indication of that fact. Kankurou sprinted ahead of her, and she concentrated on his back, not stopping at the door to the tower, but continuing on inside. Hoping to avoid seeing Gaara before she was at least properly bandaged up, she rounded the corner leading to her room and crashed into him, a little noise of surprise escaping from her as he caught her.

"You're back already..." he began, then trailed off, his forehead creasing in a small frown once he got a good look at her. She tried not to wince when his hand settled over the wound on her hip, but he noticed and drew back, frowning more when a glance at it revealed blood. "What happened?" His gaze then focused on the tight bandage around her arm, and the slowly spreading crimson stain in the middle of it.

"We were ambushed by rogues, at the oasis before the Konoha border," she gasped out, her breathing still too rapid. "And then..."

"Ruka found us." Hitori's head snapped around and she glared hard at Yomi. He raised his hands a little, shrugging his shoulders in a gesture of helplessness as Gaara's eyes narrowed.

"Is he dead?" The eerie tone of Gaara's voice made her shiver just a little, then she sighed as Yomi started shaking his head. She tried to move, but Gaara's right arm was locked around her waist. Until he decided otherwise, she wouldn't be going anywhere.

"The bastard ran off like the damned coward he is," he scoffed, making a disgusted face as he pulled his still wet shirt away from his skin. "If you'll excuse me... I need a long, hot bath..." He walked off muttering under his breath, sneezing, and making futile attempts to brush off the sand that had clumped on him the moment it met the dampness.

"I'll send for a medic...?" Kankurou walked up more slowly, a curious, wide-eyed Ibuki following closely behind him. "This is Ibuki." The puppet user jerked his thumb back over his shoulder to indicate the Anbu and never slowed, but headed straight for the medical building. "I'll get him situated, ne?"

Gaara eyed the new Anbu and nodded shortly, then dismissed him from his thoughts for the moment, his eyes going back to Hitori. She was too pale, though she didn't seem to be badly wounded. "I'm glad you're back." His voice came out softer than usual and he smiled down at her.

Relief flooded through her as she returned his smile, and let herself relax against him a little. With slow, careful steps he led her up to his room and seated her on the bed, settling beside her and starting to unwind the bandage around her arm. She tensed, wondering how bad the wound really was. It was still bleeding some, and that meant it must be deeper than she'd originally thought.

When the last of the bloody material fell away, he stared for a long moment, then sighed as his eyes slowly closed. He started to say something, but a light knock on the half open door stopped him, and he looked up to see Kankurou with a medic nin. At Kankurou's nod, the medic darted over with his bag and started immediately cleaning out the wound. Gaara had already risen and was walking towards his brother.

Hitori tried not to frown, ignoring the pain from having her arm tended to, her eyes following the brothers as they moved towards the window. Gaara turned away from her to speak to the puppet user, and she watched Kankurou's face closely.

"Tell me what happened." His deep voice was low and calm, and didn't come close to matching the cold look in his eyes.

"We were ambushed by about five rogues dressed in black, and we took care of them with no problem. Then, just when I thought the battle was over, Ruka appeared behind her and slashed her arm." His onyx eyes darted away a little, though he kept his face calm, feeling Hitori's gaze on him. "Yomi and I were cut off from her by another group of those ninja Ruka had with him, but the little guy tore through them like they were nothing. He was advancing on Ruka when the creepy fuck decided to run away." Kankurou turned his eyes back to his brother, a worried expression on his face. "It makes me curious about where he got all the help from."

"That's what I'm wondering." Gaara closed his eyes for a moment, the fingers of one hand pressing against his lower lip as he contemplated the information Kankurou had given him. "That Anbu you brought back... What does he have to do with it?"

"He showed up at the perfect time." The puppet user smirked a little, choosing not to elaborate on that statement. "But, if you want to know anything else about him, you'd have to ask Yomi. They're... friends."

"Get Yomi, and the other one, and bring them to my office." He turned to look at Hitori as Kankurou darted off, the medical ninja following behind him. Her eyes remained closed, and silence fell to rest heavily between them. Several awkward moments passed before she rose slowly to her feet, trying hard not to look as weak as she felt. She seemed about to speak, but sighed instead and walked towards the door. Gaara watched her eyes lower to the floor as she passed him, avoiding his gaze. He turned and wrapped his arms tightly around her waist, pulling her back forcefully against his chest. "How I can prove to you that you don't have to do this alone?"

Hitori bit back a gasp of surprise, then tensed at his words. How in the hell did he always know what she was thinking? "It's my battle."

"It is." He agreed softly, his arms loosening around her, giving her the chance to pull away if she wanted to. When she didn't move, he continued on, his voice still quiet. "But it has become mine, Yomi's, and Kankurou's, and if what I suspect is true, then it will soon be Suna's, as well. Ruka's objective is to get to you, but how much is that going to mean to the innocent people of this Village who get in the way of the ninja he's gathering?"

Her head lowered when she realized she hadn't thought of all the implications of Ruka having a sizable force at his command. Danzou's favored assassin wouldn't care about any other casualties, he would remain focused on completing his mission, by any means necessary.

"I'm not going to order you to do anything, Hitori. But I am going to ask you to remember, that this man knows you. That's why Danzou chose him." Gaara drew his arms back slowly, his hands resting on either side of her waist for a long moment before he finally released her completely. "If you go out after him alone, you'll be doing exactly what he wants you to do. And if you play by his rules, he's already won." Steady, even steps carried him away from her to the doorway where he stopped to glance back once before continuing on to his office.

Left alone in Gaara's room, Hitori didn't move, her eyes locked on the floor beneath her feet, as doubt crept back into her mind to gnaw at her. No matter which direction she turned, her decision would cause someone pain. It was a nightmarish feeling to live with.

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End of chapter. Thanks for reading, and we'll see you again soon.


	18. 増加している力 Growing Forces

Author's Note: New chapter! We want to apologize for taking just a little longer than usual to post this time. And thank you so much for all the hits, and the reviews! Take care, and thanks for reading. We hope you enjoy it.

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Moon's Light, Reality's Dream  
月の光、うつつの夢  
Chapter Seventeen - 増加している力 (_Growing Forces_)

上手く出来ぬ呼吸もいつか忘れたい  
_Someday I want to forget these breaths that I couldn't make so well._

Gaara leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms the moment Yomi finished speaking. The small man's information was accurate, and more detailed than he'd hoped for, and his concern only grew as he listened. Kankurou was staring intently at the floor, much the same as he'd been doing for the last hour or so, and Ibuki was still wearing a worried frown as his pale blue eyes darted between the Kazekage and the tiny Anbu beside him. Gaara was fairly certain he could trust the newcomer, especially now that he'd heard everything, but there were still some things he was loathe to discuss in front of someone he wasn't familiar with.

"Ibuki, thank you for your help." His voice was soft, and he felt a small sense of relief when the Anbu merely nodded at him and rose to go, correctly reading the dismissal for what it was. He waited until he could no longer hear footsteps before turning back to Yomi again. "Danzou has many illicit 'friends' and alliances that Ruka must now have access to. What can you tell me about them?"

"Nothing," Yomi answered miserably as he sank a little lower in his chair and avoided the redhead's eyes.

"What do you mean, 'nothing'? I'm sure you know something..." Anger started creeping into Gaara's tone, but faded as Yomi slowly shook his head.

"I do know." He glanced up slowly, his brown eyes dark with frustration as his hands clenched into white knuckled fists. "But I still can't tell you." Pointing to his mouth for emphasis, he quietly continued. "The damned curse seal. I could try, but that would only result in me being paralyzed for a few hours, and you still wouldn't have any of the information."

Startled, Kankurou's eyes raised slowly from the floor, widening as they settled on Yomi. "And you allowed this to be done to you?"

"Every member of Root has this done to them." The small man shifted and fidgeted uncomfortably in his chair, tugging nervously at the bandages that wound all the way up both of his arms. "Our best bet for information, now, is to wait for someone in Konoha to make contact with us." He glanced up, meeting Gaara's eyes as tension started to ease out of him. "Ibuki was the one sending me messages before, but I'm certain his team leader, Kouki, will continue that."

"In the meantime, all that can really be done is to add more black ops to the shinobi already patrolling, and hope it's enough to give us an early warning of attack." There were too many variables, too many elements of this situation that were entirely out of his control, and Gaara didn't like it. His own frustration was only increasing by the moment, as he tried to figure out the best way to ensure the safety of the people of Suna.

"If you hand me a map, I could point out the best locations for those black ops." Yomi's face had taken on a determined look. "I can't talk about certain things, but I'm pretty sure I can figure out a few ways around that."

Gaara nodded slowly. "Go speak with Baki, and give him as much information as you can, in whatever way you can." He turned to Kankurou as the Anbu practically raced out of the room. "What's that look on your face for?"

Kankurou didn't bother trying to hide his frown. In all of this long discussion, one name had remained conspicuously absent, and the puppet user didn't like the implications of that. At one point, Yomi had started to say her name, but a sharp look from Gaara had cut him off before he really began. "I realize that as Kazekage, your first duty is to the Village. And you've done as much as can be done to protect them." He watched his brother's eyes narrow slightly, and knew he was treading on dangerous ground, but carried on, anyway. "Now, what about Hitori?"

"She'll do whatever she thinks is best." Gaara shifted some of the papers on his desk to another pile, and regarded his brother evenly, nothing about his expression giving away any hint of what he might be thinking.

"And if she decides to go out looking for Ruka...?" Kankurou was practically on the edge of his chair, and becoming more than a little irritated by his brother's apparent lack of concern. He knew it for the act it was, and the while he understood Gaara's need to focus on Suna first, he thought the redhead was taking it a little too far.

"Then I'll hope she can succeed, and return safely."

Stunned, the puppet user fell back in his chair, his onyx eyes wide as he stared hard at Gaara. "You'll make her take help, right? And not just go off on her own?"

Gaara stood slowly and gazed down at his brother through hardened eyes. Kankurou wasn't making this any easier on him. "You and the black ops are needed in Suna. There are too few of them to start with." He turned away, walking over to the small window and gazing out of it, his hands resting on the sill as he fought not to curl them into fists. "You know as well as I do that she would refuse any help. If she does go, she won't even tell us. She'll just leave."

"You can spare me, or even one or two black ops, and force her to take us." Kankurou stood up and started pacing, his hands moving in agitation as he spoke. "She's not thinking clearly, and... "

"No."

"That's all you have to say?" Incredulous, the puppet user stopped and glared at his brother. "How can you be so nonchalant about this?"

Gaara turned away from the window and met his brother's glare with one of his own. "I can because I have to be."

"You don't have to be so fucking cold about it!" Kankurou took a few furious steps towards the redhead, his fists nearly raising in front of him before he stopped himself. "You can protect Hitori, too."

"I can't take the freedom to choose away from her, Kankurou." For a moment, the blank mask of Gaara's expression cracked, and Kankurou could see the pain he heard in his brother's voice, on his face. The puppet user stepped back and lowered his head, unsure of what, if anything, he could say in reply as Gaara turned back to the window.

Just outside, Hitori remained frozen with her hand poised to knock, uncertain how long she'd been standing there. The brothers' conversation had been easy to overhear through the slightly open door, and her heart clenched tightly in her chest. Hearing his pain, and knowing she was the cause of it, only made her hurt more. His decision to put Suna first was the only choice he could really make, and it was the right thing to do. Now, perhaps, her own path had become a little clearer. Turning, she ran swiftly down the hallway, her vision blurring in front of her as she fought back the tears that tried desperately to escape.

She'd nearly made it to the doors leading out of the tower when Ibuki stepped out in front of her. "Ne, senpai, where are you going in such a rush?"

Dodging around him, she didn't bother to stop or reply, focusing instead on getting outside before anyone tried to change her mind. She felt his hand wrap around her arm, and turned to glare at him as he jerked her to a stop. All of the friendly charm he usually displayed seemed to disappear as he pulled her closer, his face going serious. "Let me go, Ibuki. This doesn't have anything to do with you."

"A selfish decision made in haste will only lead to an unhappy ending for everyone." His eyes searched hers for a long moment, and he sighed softly as she jerked her arm away from him and slammed through the doors. He followed immediately after her, watching her stalk away towards the training area. "Hitori!"

"I have nothing to say to you." Her voice was flat, but inside her mind reeled. Was she really being selfish, deciding to go off on her own? She shook her head to clear her thoughts, and nearly growled in frustration when he appeared at her side.

"What do you hope to accomplish by sacrificing yourself this way?" Again his hand closed around her arm, tighter this time, and Hitori decided she'd had enough of this game. No one was going to stop her, least of all this strange Anbu she'd only just met.

Before Ibuki even knew what was happening, he found himself on the ground with her crouched over him, the sharp point of a kunai digging into his neck just below his ear. A warm bead of blood trickled slowly over his skin, and he stared up at her, wide eyed, as she leaned a little closer. "If I find him and kill him, the threat is ended. The rogues will vanish back to wherever they came from without Ruka to lead them, and Suna will be safe." She pushed harder on the kunai and smiled grimly as another rivulet of blood followed the first. "If I die at his hands, Suna will still be safe because he will have accomplished his mission, and no longer have a reason to attack. Why don't you tell me where the flaw lies in that?"

"The flaw lies in why you're doing it." His voice was calm and steady, in spite of the steel biting into his flesh. "You're not acting, you're reacting. You've let your heart go to your head, and it's turning your strength into a weakness."

"You don't know what you're talking about," she began, anger simmering just below the surface. The pressure of the kunai didn't ease, even though small doubts started creeping into her mind again. Letting her heart go to her head? What the hell was that supposed to mean?

"It's only natural to want to protect the one you love." He blinked, and nearly sighed when the blade disappeared at his words. Hitori stood slowly, the heavy dagger falling from her fingers to lie in the sand beside Ibuki as her eyes widened. Understanding hit her hard, illuminating her mind like a sudden flash of bright light. She'd thought she understood when it was Gaara trying to protect her, but she'd been completely blind to her own motivations. How much of what she felt had she kept hidden from herself, or refused to acknowledge? Maybe true strength came from admitting to your feelings and fears instead of hiding or ignoring them. It was easier to run away, to go off on her own and justify it to herself as 'the right thing to do,' but was that really what she wanted? Turning on her heel, she walked away without another word, pausing for a moment at the doors to the tower before going back inside. There was something she needed to do, and she needed to do it now, while she still had the nerve to go through with it. Rising slowly to his feet, Ibuki watched her go, a small smile forming on his face.

"You can come out, Yomi kun," Ibuki laughed once she'd disappeared, wiping at the blood on his neck as he turned towards the large rock behind him.

"I thought I hated you before," the tiny Anbu said casually as he clambered up the back of the boulder to perch on the top of it with a grin. "But now that I know you're perfect _and_ smart, hate has taken on a whole new meaning."

Ibuki crossed his arms and pretended to glare while he walked over to join Yomi, settling onto the rock with a wry smile. "You have such a charming way..." The harsh cry of a hawk sounded overhead, cutting him off mid-sentence, and they raised their eyes to see the message bird landing on the tower. Both knew exactly what it meant.

"Looks like news from Konoha." Yomi tensed immediately, all of the relaxed demeanor from moments before vanishing in an instant.

"Is it too much to hope for good news?" Ibuki asked as they both jumped down and started walking slowly back, feeling a strange sort of unease. They wanted to know what the message said, and dreaded the news it might contain at the same time. Yomi shivered a little as they reached the doors, and found himself wondering, not for the first time, how an assassination order had grown into a war. Something wasn't making sense to him, and it drove him almost crazy that he couldn't figure out what it was.

Lost in his worries and the mountain of paperwork in front of him, Gaara almost missed the soft click of the door closing. Hitori leaned against the wooden surface and put her hands behind her back to keep them from shaking, her eyes lingering on her feet as she fought with herself just to look at him. Curious, he stood and walked around to the front of his desk, pausing when her head finally raised and wide jade eyes met his. Quiet footsteps carried her towards him, and then her hands were against his chest, sliding slowly up and over his shoulders as their bodies met. His arms went gently around her, a questioning look in his eyes when their gazes locked together.

"I don't want to fight alone," she said quietly, her eyes almost searching his before she took his face between her hands and leaned up on her toes to press her lips against his shyly.

His arms tightened around her, pulling her harder against him, though the soft kiss ended too quickly. Her cheeks flushed a light red as she drew back and bit her lip, surprised at her own actions. Before he could speak she rested her face against his neck, her lips brushing over his skin as she finished what she needed to say in a voice that was barely a whisper.

"I love you."

Gaara pulled away a little, still holding her tightly with one arm, but using his other hand to turn her face up to his. Her words had flooded him with a rush of overwhelming feelings that left a strange, pleasant ache in the middle of his chest. As he stared down at her, he wondered if she knew what she'd just given him. It was more than he'd even let himself wish for. Fear shone brightly in her jade eyes when they met his, and he brushed his thumb softly over her lower lip, wanting more than anything to take that fear away. "I... "

Their heads both turned at the quiet knock on the door, and he swore mentally, his thoughts full of mutterings about bad timing and unwanted interruptions. Her eyes closed as he released her and walked over to answer it. She sank into the chair behind her, saving herself from an abrupt meeting with the floor, due to the sudden weakness in her knees.

Kankurou and Yomi were both standing anxiously behind the messenger who'd knocked, and Gaara took the message, nodding in thanks before the shinobi darted off. Stepping back, he motioned for the other two to enter and turned back to his desk, his gaze lingering on Hitori as he passed her, unable to keep a small smile from forming. He didn't bother to sit, dropping the container on his desk while his eyes moved quickly over the paper in his hands.

Yomi sat quietly next to Hitori, glancing at her once before his eyes returned to watching Gaara, his tense body perched precariously on the edge of his chair. Leaning against the wall, Kankurou crossed his arms over his chest, trying to be more patient than he felt.

"Nisei has been found, and she's badly injured, but safe." He lowered the paper, that same smile still on his face as he leaned against his desk, bracing himself with one hand on the rough surface.

"She's safe," Hitori whispered in relief, leaning back against the chair as her eyes closed.

Yomi practically fell onto the floor, all the tension draining from him. "Nisei's ok! I'm so glad it's good news."

"Very good news. And there was something else." Gaara waited until their eyes had returned to him before he continued. "The Hokage is sending out more teams to patrol the border, and has offered to send some here, as well."

"This is..." Yomi could barely contain his excitement, his hands waving madly in front of him as he jumped to his feet.

"More than we could have hoped for," Kankurou finished for him, smiling a little at the tiny Anbu. "

"Exactly," Gaara agreed, his eyes meeting Hitori's as she looked up at him. "It's an incredible feeling to be given more than you dared to hope for." Kankurou turned wide eyes to Yomi who grinned back at him, and the two moved quickly to leave, the door closing softly behind them.

Several quiet moments passed before Gaara broke the silence by taking Hitori's hand and pulling her out of the chair. "Come with me?" At her small nod, he led her though the other door and up onto the roof, walking all the way to the railing. The wispy clouds overhead raced by, tugged along playfully by a breeze that carried the dark scent of the desert. As Hitori gazed up at them, he pulled her tightly against him, smiling when she slid her arms around his neck without hesitation. Leaning forward, he spoke softly against her ear. "I love you, too."

She felt his lips brush over her skin and shivered, her eyes closing to hide the suddenly threatening tears. He was right. Hearing him say those words, being held so tightly in his arms... It was an incredible feeling.

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Thoughts of Heaven started to fade the moment Nisei heard what sounded like birds chirping. If she was really on the other side, she seriously doubted that she would hear creatures complaining this early in the day. In the afterlife, she would be beyond the dislike for being pulled away from the warmth and comfort of her dreams, as well as the tendency to hear commiseration in the sounds of Nature around her. The thought amused her as she slowly opened her eyes and relaxed against the sheets. They were familiar, with their printed Hidden Leaf logos, and extremely comfortable, soft against her sensitive skin. She was in Kakashi's bed. Nisei sat up swiftly, immediately closing her eyes from the assumption that her injuries would make her regret such a thoughtless action, and she was surprised when the expected dizziness never came. She felt nothing.

She wondered, briefly, why she wasn't in Konoha's infirmary. The condition she'd been in when Kakashi found her made it the logical choice to let the medical staff treat her wounds. Finding herself able to move so well, and without pain, raised a few uneasy questions in her mind. Was it possible that she'd slept for days, requiring constant attention and inspection, and that's why she was under Kakashi's care? She raised a hand to her head and held it tightly, just barely noticing the shadow moving across the floor. Pakkun watched the girl with knowing eyes, and something that might have been a smirk on a human's face, but looked strange on the dog.

"Feeling a lot better, are we?" She nodded as she turned to peek along the side of the bed, seeing the pug ninken there. Smiling, she patted softly next to where she rested on the bed.

"Come up, Pakkun." She hit the bed again, feeling impatience starting to grow in her when he remained on the floor, merely gazing up at her with those giant, mournful eyes. "What's wrong?"

His lazy expression barely changed. "Kakashi wouldn't like that very much."

"At the moment, I'm the one occupying this bed, and I don't mind." Upon hearing her words, Pakkun jumped up and settled himself in front of the Anbu Captain with a happy sigh. It was funny, thinking that Kakashi had such a rule for his ninken. They weren't allowed up on the bed. It wasn't like she was ungrateful and doing this to spite him, but mostly that Pakkun was being unusually cute, especially in light of his normally grave demeanor.

Pakkun stretched out across the bed, resting his head on the tops of his paws and peering up at her, the angle just making his already large brown eyes seem even bigger."Nisei, you'll be happy to know that Kakashi is also doing a lot better." Before should could ask the question burning on the tip of her tongue, Pakkun was answering it. "He's been out training Naruto."

Naruto was already back from his mission with Sai, Sakura, and Yamato. It made perfect sense that Kakashi would immediately resume training the genin, given Naruto's importance to the village, and his goals for the future. Master Jiraiya had taken over training him for three years, and now it was time that Kakashi had him back. The Akatsuki was moving faster than ever before, and more openly as well, to collect the various tailed beasts from their hosts. The importance of Kakashi's student growing stronger was a burden that the Jonin would willingly bear, until he knew for sure that Naruto was ready to face the struggles before him - the life of a hunted Jinchuuriki. Of course, Kakashi had been specifically chosen for his students. It was the only choice that made sense.

"I am happy to hear it," she laughed, while pulling the sheets down. The shirt she was wearing was plain black, with a red squiggly on each side. God help her, she was wearing the Jonin's clothing. She looked underneath the sheets and saw that the shorts that the old man gave her were still in place, though the strange relief she felt did nothing to alleviate the color in her cheeks. It's not like she was hoping that Kakashi had given her the full attire.

"He's been taking care of you this entire time. You were too stubborn to wake up." Was there a fond gleam in the dog's eyes as he spoke, or was she just imagining that? She brushed aside the question in her mind as the pug continued speaking. "He has been administering medicine, helping you bathe, and also forcing you to drink were out for the better part of three days, so you can understand his actions." Pakkun said it casually, but the girl still found it insulting. Kakashi had bathed, fed, and dressed her? For three days? She felt uncomfortably like a child, and even if she was unable to care for herself, that only meant he should have left her in the infirmary to begin with. Taking care of injured or sick people who needed that sort of attention was what they were there for, after all. Pakkun raised his eyes to hers. "It's like they say, 'What goes around, comes around'. Irony does have its way with others."

"Pakkun..." Worried, she reached out to him only to watch him disappear in a cloud of smoke. He had been summoned. Her eyes narrowed as she flipped back the sheets, then walked over to the dresser and rummaged through the drawers, finding herself a pair of pajamas. The blue and black plaid had her rolling her eyes. Just when she thought Kakashi wasn't human, some odd little thing like this would prove her wrong yet again. Smirking, she continued on into the bathroom, going about taking care of herself as if to prove that she was perfectly capable of doing these things on her own. It was just too bad the effort was wasted, without Kakashi, or even Pakkun, there to witness it.

She was obviously angry, but what was that fury really directed towards? Aggravation that the first sight she woke up to wasn't his mismatched gaze? She adjusted the water to warm as she stepped into the shower. The pounding spray felt good on her sore muscles, easing away all the aches and tension. It was scary to realize how much time had passed while she lay unconscious. What had she missed in those three days? Worry filled her when she thought about her team, for one thing. She hadn't seen them in so long. The soaps and conditioners rinsed from her body, and she stepped out, toweling off before sliding on the pajamas. As she glanced down at herself, she couldn't help but laugh at how ridiculous she must look. Considering their height difference, she was practically swimming in these clothes.

Back in Kakashi's bed, she found herself at the center of a shrine to hentai-themed novels. Nisei actually dared to reach up over her head and pull one of the organized paperbacks from the shelf there. Depicted on the cover, was a working man, and a normal looking woman. They were dramatically placed apart, with a shadow between them, giving the idea that there were two men involved in the plot of this particular story. She flipped through the pages, noticing that it wasn't a very long book, and began to read it, feeling only slightly absurd.

Maybe she would understand Kakashi a little bit better if she skimmed a few pages. He was the most complicated guy she'd ever met, so even one possible piece to a backwards puzzle might give something away. But the more she read, the more she found herself actually showing interest, and even enjoying the story itself, compelled to continue on by every word her eyes met. She didn't know which was worse, the fact that Jiraiya had written these books from experience, or that Kakashi enjoyed reading about the Sannin's exploits and dalliances, that he'd dramatized into adventurous encounters in the pages of these books. It was obvious that Kakashi did like it, judging by the number of volumes filling the cramped shelves of his equally cramped apartment.

"Enjoying it?" Kakashi watched the young captain from the doorway, his masked face showing no expression whatsoever. She froze, closing the book, and moving to slowly put it down, as he waved his hand dismissively, already turning slightly away.. "Don't stop on my account."

Nisei shifted uncomfortably, her eyes locked onto the leaf symbol on the sheets over her legs. "Yeah, well..."

"I actually favor that book..." He pointed a finger towards it as he walked further into the room. It seemed that with each step he took, the tension grew between them until it was almost tangible, his onyx right eye inspecting her every movement. "It reminds me of a situation I've been in."

Her eyes rose to meet his as she contemplated what she'd read of the story. "Two guys and one girl? Wow, it seems like she would have be someone pretty special. Lucky girl."

He held her gaze there for a long moment. "She is pretty special. Nice pajamas." Nisei wasn't certain, but for a moment he seemed to be smirking beneath that damned mask he insisted upon wearing.

Only after his words had a moment to sink in did the meaning behind them click, and Nisei's eyes widened thoughtfully at the realization. Kouki and Kakashi? Was that even a possibility, when it seemed so obvious that Kakashi took up the space in her mind, and her heart? Kouki was someone who was overly concerned about Nisei, and the person who had been there for her while Kakashi wasn't. In other words, a good friend, though he didn't hide the fact that he wanted to be more. Jealousy was a dangerous thing to deal with, but she couldn't imagine that the Jonin would ever play that game, or that Kouki would participate in such a thing, either. She shouldn't have to worry, though the thought tickled in the back of her mind, anyway, no matter how deeply she buried it.

The answer she'd promised Kakashi in the letter she'd left for him would have to come out sooner or later. She was dissecting the inevitable reality of it inside her head when she felt the bed shift under the added weight of Kakashi's upper arms, bracing himself as he closed her in and leaned down. The soft kiss he placed on the top of her head left her immobilized. Whether it was his act of affection, or the closeness of his body, she felt something inside of her freeze, though her heart started to pound furiously.

Her eyes fluttered closed as his strong voice murmured into her hair, "Thank you for being awake. I was worried that you would never open your eyes. I guess you really are a stubborn girl."

"Kakashi..." Her voice came out breathless, and she nearly damned herself for the almost longing quality she heard in it. "I... the answer...to..."

He pulled back just enough to look at her, searching her golden eyes for even a hint of doubt. Something in her gaze and the furious blush on her cheeks caused the Jonin to allow her to have a moment to calmly order the chaos of her thoughts. Now was hardly the time for Nisei to exert extra energy, even if it was simply to talk about something that was hard for her to wrap her mind around. He knew that in the past that he'd brought unnecessary pain and stress into her life. This answer of hers meant everything to both of them.

She reached her hand up slowly, resting it on the back of his neck as her other hand slid along the black fabric of his mask, drawing it down. That action was nothing less than the removal of the last barrier between them, and something of an answer in its own right. Nisei fell back against the pillow, and he followed the gesture by lowering himself to meet her. At the first taste of his lips, she thought her heart would explode out of her chest. He released a quiet breath as her mouth moved slowly from his top lip to the bottom one, softly and with little contact, getting used to the feel of him. She was still trying to act like the proud captain while her third kiss was stolen - this time in the correct way.

They shifted slightly, and her legs parted a little to let his slender body gently settle comfortably against hers, needing to feel the contact even more. She didn't know what had come over her, other than possible madness, as she threw logic, and all of her doubts and fears, out the window. It felt good, whatever it was, and she wanted more, wrapping her arms tightly around him, and arching up against him when he moved suddenly. The noise he got in response to what appeared to be an accident became addictive, as his tongue ran along her bottom lip, and parted her mouth to deepen the kiss with slow, pleasing strokes.

The kiss was broken with a gasp, and she felt his lips go across her skin, moving slowly from her cheek to her neck. His mouth was hot even against the feverish feeling of her skin, and his tongue felt like silk as he greedily sought more of the taste of her. The warm, moist kisses he was placing caused her shoulders to scrunch up as she instinctively tried to ease the tickling sensation spreading throughout her body. His hand grabbed her right wrist and pinned it against the pillow, his fingers lacing in hers as she felt the gentle sharpness of his teeth teasing over her earlobe. The word 'stop' didn't even come to mind, as if she would want to say such a thing at this moment, anyway. It felt too good.

"As tempting as you are, I think it must stop here..." The change in his voice was at odds with the way his lips moved over her skin, and both sensations caused her body to tremble. She'd proven that she wanted him, only to have him deny her this way? The reason why he wanted to stop left her feeling slightly humiliated. As he slid away from her body, the warmth she'd been surrounded by just seconds before quickly turned into cold. When she was finally able to move, she eased herself up against the headboard, and looked away from him.

"I'm sorry-" Before she could finish apologizing, he turned her face back to his, kissing her deeply. He tangled his fingers in her long hair, gripping firmly as he turned her face up even more, giving him better access to her mouth, which he immediately took full advantage of before moving slowly away from her again.

To then see Kakashi's trademark eye-crease left her gawking at him, not knowing what the hell to do or think anymore. "I have to go back and continue training Naruto with Yamato. I just wanted to check up on you."

Still dazed, she nodded slowly, confusion plain on her face and swirling deep within her golden eyes. "Well, yeah, okay. Thank you. Thank you for taking care of me..."

He held his hand out towards her, as if to indicate that her gratitude wasn't necessary, drawing her words to an awkward, stuttering halt. "It was no problem." That eye crease appeared again, and then he cheerfully waved a little. "I'll see you later!"

Kakashi was already leaving as she got up and quickly rushed towards the main room, to find there was no one there. Her eyes widened when she felt the smoke left behind by him abruptly vanishing sift through her hair. Slowly, she willed herself to walk back to his room, but she knew she could no longer stay there. No, it was more that she didn't want to. His odd response to her answer, which had supposedly meant so much to him, had left her hurt and stunned, making her feel like she was breaking apart inside.

In the midst of her sad reverie, there was a knock on the door and she smiled to herself as her head turned towards it. That's what she thought. Of course! He realized he'd inadvertently hurt her, again, and come back to apologize. Feeling lighter now, she practically skipped to the door, and opened it with a smile, not even slightly expecting the sight of bright blue eyes obscured by choppy strands of white blonde hair.

"Kouki?" Shock nearly made her stutter the name of the last person she thought to see on Kakashi's doorstep. His eyes were like shards of ice, his jaw clenched tightly as he gritted his teeth, and the hands at his sides were clenched into white knuckled fists. The only thought that came to mind, was that she was certain she'd never seen him this furious. When he spoke, the tone of his voice left no room for any doubt whatsoever, nearly freezing her on the spot, as if what he had to say wouldn't have accomplished exactly the same thing.

"We need to talk."

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End of chapter. Thanks for reading, and we hope you enjoyed it!


	19. 招待 Invitation

Author's Note: Chapter Eighteen already! It doesn't seem like it's been barely a month since we started this story! Again, we'd like to thank you for all of the hits and the reviews. They always mean a lot to us.

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Moon's Light, Reality's Dream  
月の光、うつつの夢  
Chapter Eighteen - 招待 (_Invitation_)

誰も居ない　うつぶせの明日  
_No one's left in a tomorrow turned upside-down_  
他人のふりさ　理解っていたさ_  
Even I understand the disadvantage of involving an outsider_

"Talk about what?" Nisei asked, as she eyed the now hostile Anbu, who looked as though he hadn't seen his bed in over a week. Maybe he was in even worse shape than she was. His sudden appearance was a little discomforting, and he hadn't shown her even the hint of a smile or any sort of kindness. Just a cold, measuring gaze that made her feel uneasy, even more so than the events that had unfolded with Kakashi just moments before the knock on the door.

"Well, for one, why the hell you agreed to actually go through with that mission." He already knew that it was her duty to do as the Hokage asked, and he also knew that Nisei probably begged, pushed, and practically threw herself in front of Tsunade just to have the opportunity of having such a mission. He continued, because he also knew that Nisei would have little to say. Nothing would save her from this confrontation. He didn't care where they were, or who was around. There were things between them that needed to be said, and he was tired of waiting for 'the right time,' when it would never come. "You were running away again, weren't you? That's what you always do when you can't handle something, even though you should know by now that it only delays the inevitable."

She sighed, hating the fact that he would probably never stop treating her like a child. It was a phenomenon that seemed to be catching on, since everyone was doing it of late. "That's all you can think about, Kouki? It's really nice to see you too. I'm glad that you're doing better than the last time I saw you." His behavior was more than a damned insult really, and he hadn't seemed even a little surprised when she opened the door, alive and well. She briefly wondered where he'd gotten his daily updates about her condition, since they certainly hadn't come from Kakashi.

"And another thing. This decision of yours nearly got you killed. Never do something reckless like that again-" He stopped, frowning when he heard her laughter. She wasn't taking him seriously at all at the moment. The expression on her face seemed saddened, and yet sarcastically overjoyed. It irritated her to hear this from him. She already knew, more than anyone, that what she'd done was foolish, a big mistake, and one that she would never repeat if she could avoid it. The last thing she needed was for him to rant at her about it in such a condescending way.

"I already know that. Thank you for the old news, Kouki." The way she said his name, in a lingering, teasing tone, was more than obviously intended as a bite towards him. The Anbu's azure eyes didn't waver in the slightest, as he took a step closer to her. She frowned, and stared hard at him, as if she could will him to go away just by thinking about it. "You really shouldn't get too close to me. I'm cold."

"Cold?" he asked, only inches away from her now, though he could see it was true. A lot of things about Nisei seemed to be dead, just as dead as she had almost been. Even staring into her eyes, something that was usually there seemed to have gone missing. Not even a pale spark reflected in their depths, and it had always been visible there before, even when it seemed that only her misery resided within those golden orbs. Kouki had assumed that finally being with Kakashi would have changed all of that unhappiness into something much brighter. It should have been the fulfilled promise of the one big something that Nisei had always wanted.

"Everything is so confusing." She let out another laugh, as she wrapped her arms tightly around herself. The blue and black plaid was odd for this type of weather, the material too heavy, but she didn't seem to notice or care. Nothing breached the walls around her. "I think I'm ready to have my squad and my normal life back. I want everything back. I feel lost without my routines." Her eyes took on the steely resolve of determination as she decided, and stepped outside without thinking twice about it. "The first step will be going home."

"I can walk with you, if you'd like?" Kouki suggested in a questioning tone, though they both knew that he would follow her in some possessed manner, even if she refused. Much to his dismay, he knew he would follow Nisei anywhere. It was a hold on him that only she seemed to have. No one drove him as much as she did, and no one got him as well as she did. It would be absolutely absurd to ever stop loving, or caring about the girl the way that he did. He wondered if it was at all possible to actually put an end to his feelings, even if he wanted to. She was the only person who'd ever left him feeling powerless.

They began walking, and the villagers, thankfully, didn't seem to take any notice of the Anbu captain wearing ridiculously large plaid pajamas in the middle of the day. They made their way across the wooden bridge, and over the sunlight dappled water that flowed serenely beneath it. Kouki took Nisei's silence as something comforting for once. Usually when she was quiet, it was because she was thinking of something deep, and her deep thoughts almost always led to a memory or two. Those were the very same memories that he kept with him, as well. He couldn't forget any monumental happening in this woman's life, and he knew better than to try. It was useless to fight a battle with yourself that you were certain to lose.

Just as they walked up to her apartment, the Anbu paused to regard his partner. She didn't look at him, but she could feel his eyes settling on her anyway. It prickled her skin, making her want to run into her apartment and close the door, forever locking out the rest of the world. When he finally spoke, his voice was soft, so very unlike Kakashi's now, and sincere. "Nisei... Welcome back."

Before she could take a step towards her door, she felt a change in the air and heard his footsteps as he advanced behind her, yet she couldn't stop Kouki from wrapping his arms around her. Her back was pressed tightly against his chest, and she stood there in shock, unable to move or even to think. This was Kouki who had his arms around her, holding her like this? She moved her head to the side when she felt his nose touch the back of her neck, but that movement only resulted in a firmer embrace, with his face buried in her hair against her shoulder.

"I missed you..." What she next heard could have only been the sound of tears as he released a shuddering breath. It shook throughout his entire body as he haltingly continued. "If you had died, I... Nisei. Do not ever do that again. Ever...If you think that I can restrain myself from going completely mad if something ever happened to you, then you are mistaken." His voice grew even quieter, and nearly broke as he finished. "I can't do anything without you."

Nisei felt her breath catch in her throat, unable to let out a sound, as he roughly forced her head back to meet his shoulder. Being this close, holding her seemed like a remedy all on its own for the Anbu. His eyes closed as he felt her heartbeat and the warmth from her body, concentrating on them as he blocked out the rest of the world, and his focus narrowed down to just her. The smell of her - He ran the tip of his nose along the curve of her neck. Nisei was alive. The possessive hold that he had on her body only grew tighter, making her stiffen as she released a gasp.

"You must let go of me." Her hands gripped at his, but he caught them effortlessly and held her still. It's not like she was afraid of Kouki, just the thought was laughable, but his feelings were something that she'd been trying to repel for quite some time now. Apparently, nothing was working.

"Even if you say I must, I don't think that I can. If I let you go something could happen to you again." She had never known the Anbu to be like this, not ever. He was a commander, a very successful one, and was usually quiet and serious, absolutely certain of himself. Now he just seemed pathetic, and she knew that if she were to ask him to get down on his knees and crawl, then he would probably do it without thinking twice. This realization alone made her feel worse than she already did. She'd tried to treat him as a good friend, up until now. Maybe, to prove that she was serious, she'd have to try something different.

"Kouki, don't make me second guess my decision. I will hurt you." The listless tone of her voice caused him to pull back. He almost missed the threat in her words when he wondered what she'd meant by 'her decision.' Kouki raised a slender brow at her and waited for her to explain, as she straightened herself up to her full height and looked steadily at him. "I'm going to stay with you for awhile. Just until I get better. I need you to help me get back into shape. Do not take it easy on me. I'll make you regret it if you try." Her eyes narrowed as she leaned a little towards him. "Got it?"

He nodded slowly. "Of course, it would make sense anyway. But why leave Kakashi's place? I figured that's where you'd want to be."

There he went, back into the safe harbor of friendship as he pushed his real feelings to the side. She knew that he hated Kakashi with an enduring passion that almost bordered on madness, but he'd never let anyone besides her, and the Jonin himself, see it. Nisei shrugged as she turned away from the blonde Anbu. She really didn't want to make a big deal out of Kakashi once again crushing her heart, or to even think about it if she could avoid it. "It doesn't really matter. He's busy with training Naruto, and I don't want him to worry about me, when he should be worrying about his student. The point is that he's doing what's right."

"Hai," Kouki answered thoughtfully, curiosity burning in his eyes as he watched Nisei walk inside her apartment, then waited patiently against the side of the building for her to she reappeared, she seemed even more annoyed than before, and possibly defeated by whatever thoughts were starting to swarm in her head and take possession of her. He already knew that they would about Kakashi. Everything came back to Kakashi.

They stepped back out onto the main path towards the shops, heading for Kouki's apartment. She had changed out of the bulky pajamas into her usual Anbu uniform. At some point she would have to return to the Hokage's headquarters for the routine argument that was bound to take place with Tsunade. That was another unpleasant thing that was catching on. Everyone seemed to want to argue with her lately, too. She enjoyed the silence that surrounded them as they walked, and was grateful that Kouki didn't make things uncomfortable, even though just his presence already did that to some degree.

Behind her, moving slowly on the ground, a small pug followed their route. Kakashi's eyes, nose, and ears, Pakkun stayed behind closely, but far enough away to remain unobserved, like a good little spy. Shaking his head, the small ninken sighed. He really didn't like where this was heading.

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Gaara stepped silently into Hitori's room to see her standing at the window. Her back was to him, and she had her long, dark red hair pulled forward over her right shoulder, brushing it while she gazed out into the dawn. The pale sunlight flowed over her, making the strands her brush moved through look like dark fire, and the loose, white clothes she slept in seemed almost to glow. It gave her an ethereal look, as if she was something that belonged in another world. That strange ache settled in his chest again as he walked closer to her, not stopping until he could slide his arms around her, lowering his head to kiss her neck just below her ear. Hitori gasped slightly at the contact, dropping the brush in surprise. She laughed softly at herself, relaxing the moment she realized it was Gaara, and rested her hands lightly over his, leaning back against him.

"Good morning," he said softly, his lips lingering against the softness of her skin. She shivered, sighing as she tilted her head to the side a little, unconsciously giving him more access to her neck. With a smile, he took the invitation and trailed soft, slow kisses from her jaw to her collarbone.

"It is a good morning," she answered in a slightly trembling voice, letting her eyes fall closed. These quiet times, early in the morning before anyone else was really awake yet, were quickly becoming the best moments of the day. Everything seemed more like a dream than reality, but it was a dream she didn't ever want to wake from.

"Very." He looked up to glance out of the window, his voice quiet as he continued speaking. "There's a festival day coming soon. I sent an invitation to your friend, Nisei, with the others going to Konoha."

"I... thank you," she nearly whispered, moving her head a little to glance up at him. " I would very much like to see her." As he raised his head, she turned in his arms so that she was facing him. "That was thoughtful of you."

"I was hoping you'd be pleased." He took a step forward, his hands holding her arms as he pressed her gently against the wall, closing his eyes when she gasped at being trapped between his body and the smooth surface behind her.

She started to speak as her fingers tangled into his hair, but his mouth meeting her slightly parted lips made whatever she was going to say flee from her thoughts. His left hand held the side of her face as his right slid up her arm to rest against her neck, and his mouth moved over hers, slowly and softly at first, but growing more bold as she began to shyly kiss him back. She felt his lips part against hers, and then his tongue went across her upper lip, burning almost like fire and making her gasp again, her fingers tightening reflexively in his hair as a sensation of warmth flooded through her. He repeated the act more slowly before deepening the kiss, his hands falling away from her face to settle on her back, pulling her hard against him the moment his tongue slipped into her mouth.

This kiss was nothing like the innocent ones they'd shared before. Inexperience made them both a little hesitant, but it didn't come close to making either of them want to stop. She was acutely aware of every inch of his body that pressed against hers, even as she lost herself in the pleasurable feelings he was provoking in her. One hand dropped to his shoulder, her fingers tightening, gripping onto him as the kiss continued, slow and curious.

He could feel the thundering beat of her heart matching his own as he slid one hand down her side, letting it rest on her waist. The small sounds that came from her nearly caused him to fall apart, each gasp only making him want to do whatever it took to hear it again. Both were trembling when he finally broke the kiss and pulled away from her just enough to look down at her, his fingers moving to softly touch her slightly swollen lips as her eyes slowly opened. The jade color was darker than usual and her pale cheeks held a light pink blush. As she gazed up at him, he found himself thinking she'd never been more beautiful.

Yomi backed slowly away from the open door, nearly scaring himself half to death when he ran into another body. Ibuki's soft laughter filled his ears as he turned to glare at the Anbu. He stalked off down the hall a little way before turning to calmly regard his friend.

"I wasn't spying," he began hotly, leaning back against the wall and crossing his arms over his chest, his face slightly red, but otherwise looking perfectly relaxed. "I was just-"

"This time," Ibuki interrupted, his face twitching a little as he did everything possible to stop the smile that was threatening to appear. "I came up to see if she was ready to go to the training area." He laughed softly again, glancing back towards Hitori's doorway. "I'm going to guess that she's not."

"You're training with her today?" Yomi's eyes roamed rudely over the other man before he turned away, snorting a little. "In what? The best way to apply makeup and style your hair? How to dress like a cheap piece of-"

"Hand to hand combat." A cheeky grin appeared on the taller Anbu's face. He was obviously enjoying all the chances to interrupt his smart mouthed friend. "You might be better with a ninjato, but we all know who's the best with their hands."

"I bet I could get confirmation of that from every girl at every bath house in Konoha," Yomi muttered in a gloomy tone as he started slowly walking away. His eyes rolled when he realized Ibuki was following him. "Don't you have anything better to do than hang around and annoy me?"

"Nothing that's this much fun." Pale blue eyes creased upwards, and his smile only had the effect of making his face even prettier. Yomi barely suppressed the urge to punch the Anbu, reminding himself that they were friends. Friends. It was a difficult thing to remember, sometimes.

The small man caught sight of Kankurou up ahead and nearly sighed in relief. "I have some things to take care of," he said as he sprinted off towards the puppet user, leaving the other man behind. Ibuki laughed hard as he watched the tiny Anbu run away, then casually leaned back against the wall, patiently waiting on Hitori. It was too amusing how easy it was to get under Yomi's skin, without even really trying. He watched Temari walk by carrying a box, and idly wondered what was inside of it, even as his eyes moved appraisingly over her.

Temari noticed Ibuki, and his scrutiny of her, smirking a little to herself as she continued on. When she stepped into Hitori's room, the girl was nowhere in sight, and she set the box quietly on a low table, turning to leave. A small sound from the direction of the bathroom caught her attention and she looked back to see the former Anbu just stepping out, binding the end of the braid in her long hair.

"There you are." She smiled at the look of surprise on Hitori's face and lifted the lid off of the box before reaching inside. "I brought you something."

Hitori watched as the blonde carefully unfolded a long, black yukata and held it up. It had a pattern embroidered onto it, of green leaves and smoky purple flowers. As she stepped closer, she was able to see what looked like butterflies in a pale, silvery thread above each flower. The entire thing seemed to almost shimmer, and the fabric was light and soft as her fingers moved over it. "It's beautiful," she said softly, her eyes full of questions as she glanced up at Temari. She'd never worn anything like this before, and had never thought she would need to.

An emerald obi and smaller purple belt followed, each matching perfectly to the threads in the embroidery. Temari set down a pair of geta and a smaller box that sounded like it held something metallic, completing the outfit before she finally spoke. "It's for the festival. Being with Gaara, you'll be expected to dress appropriately." She smiled at the look of surprised confusion on the redhead's face. "I knew you wouldn't have anything to wear, so I got this for you."

Jade eyes roamed slowly over the outfit lying on the bed, glanced down at the black and white shorts and shirt she was currently wearing, and then met the kunoichi's eyes again. "Thank you. But... I have no idea how to wear any of this."

"I'll help you, of course." There was a sparkle in her dark eyes as Temari carefully hung the yukata behind the screen against the wall. "You really are very pretty." She glanced critically over Hitori, taking her in from head to toe. "It's about time we turned you into a girl. Every female in Suna is going to be curious about the one who finally caught the Kazekage's eye." Soft laughter bubbled out of her as Hitori's eyes widened dramatically, the sound like tinkling bells as it filled the room.

"I-" She bit her lip, her eyes lowering to rest on the floor. It was sometimes easy to forget just how important Gaara was to the people of the Village, and how much he was on display. Hitori couldn't help but wonder if they would think her good enough for their Kazekage.

"Don't look so scared." The blonde patted her shoulder softly as Ibuki appeared silently at the door, then stepped back politely to avoid interrupting the two. Quiet footsteps carried Temari to the doorway, and she nodded at Ibuki before glancing back over her shoulder. "All that really matters is what my brother thinks, ne?" As soon as she'd left, the Anbu stepped into the room and tipped his head sideways at Hitori.

"Ready to train, senpai?" He smiled impishly as her head slowly raised.

"Yes." Hitori's eyes closed for a long moment before she smiled back at the Anbu. "I'm definitely in the mood to hit something."

"Ah," he nodded, his eyes creasing as his grin widened. "But you can't hit what you can't catch!" Laughing, he turned and sprinted out of the room and down the hall, nimbly dodging the people walking by. Hitori was after him immediately, tension easing out of her as she gained on him with every stride.

The sun shone down brilliantly as they squared off in the training area. It felt good to go back to something as simple and predictable as combat exercises. After awhile, Yomi and Kankurou joined them, and things progressed into a free-for-all melee. Shouted taunts and laughter filled the air, along with the sounds of battle waged with fists and feet, until the sun started to set. With a victorious shout, Hitori flipped Yomi over her shoulder and laughed hard when he hit the ground and growled.

"Enough, woman. You win." He glanced to either side, laughing softly at Kankurou and Ibuki who were both also flat on their backs, gasping for air. "We have no choice but to surrender."

"Hai," Ibuki groaned, his own laughter joining Yomi's after a moment.

"I was ready to quit an hour ago," Kankurou added with a smirk as he slowly pulled himself to his feet.

"I humbly accept your surrender," Hitori said with mock gravity and a little bow, before her eyes caught the crimson starting to streak across the sky. "I'm late!" She gasped and darted off, glancing back over her shoulder to yell, "Thanks, guys!" The small man stood and brushed the sand from his clothes, watching her go as he extended a hand down to Ibuki and pulled the Anbu up.

'It looks good on you, Hitori,' Yomi thought as he, Kankurou, and Ibuki started slowly walking back, the other two already launching into a good natured litany of complaints as the sunset exploded above them. 'Love is definitely your color.'

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End of chapter. Thanks for reading! Hope you enjoyed it.


	20. 下部 Underneath

Author's Note: The next chapter, twenty, will be split into two halves, parts I and II.

We've added two new "inspiration photos" on the author's page. One for Ruka and one for Ibuki.

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Moon's Light, Reality's Dream  
月の光、うつつの夢  
Chapter Nineteen - 下部 (_Underneath_)

瞳孔に浮かべる現実は殼　麻痺した感情の所為か  
_Floating in those pupils, reality is a shell; Is it because of these paralyzed emotions?  
_

Hitori opened her eyes slowly and studied the girl in front of her as she held out her hand for her weapon. She'd lost count of how many training matches she'd been forced to endure, and this small, black haired Anbu seemed no different than the rest of her opponents, except for something that seemed to burn inside her strange, golden eyes. Turning, she looked up to meet the dark, steady gaze of her sensei. Ruka's face gave away no emotion whatsoever when he offered her the blunted sword, hilt first. Her mouth twitched as her hand tightened around what she saw as a useless lump of metal. They trained with their razor sharp blades every day, and yet for matches such as these, edged weapons were forbidden. This was 'exhibition only,' or something foolish like that, a test of the Anbu, and the Anbu elite, to match their training methods against each other. It was Danzou's idea, of course, so she never questioned it. Hitori always did exactly as she was told.

"This one is different." Ruka's voice was deep and soft as he leaned close to her to give her a few last minute instructions. There was no encouragement, only expectation. She would win, and no one doubted it, except maybe the young Anbu she was facing today. That girl was hunting her captaincy, and had agreed to this match for that reason only. Hitori recognized the blonde haired man beside Nisei as Kouki, whom she'd fought, and defeated, six or eight months ago.

"Different how, sensei?" The words were flat, lacking any curiosity or depth, just a basic request for information. This man was the only one to ever beat her in any match, so she respected what he had to say, and admired his talent for dissecting an opponent's abilities.

"Emotional." Ruka's mouth twisted a little as he spoke the word, and she could hear the faint distaste in his tone. "Ask your stupid little partner. She beat him easily, as if he was a rookie."

The anger in Yomi's brown eyes was barely concealed by the shadows from his mask, and as Ruka moved away, Hitori was certain she was the only one to see that fury. "It's true," he muttered, his arms crossing over his chest as he sighed. "She kicked my ass up one side of this field and down the other. So," he turned to look up at his partner, frowning a little at the empty, unconcerned look in her eyes. "Don't get cocky. Yeah, you're undefeated so far. That's not going to last forever. Watch your ass."

She nodded at Yomi and took her inu mask from his hand as he stretched it towards her. The moment she settled the cool porcelain over her face, Ruka was at her side again.

"I almost forgot to mention, this Nisei is the rising favorite among the regular Anbu. Danzou sama would like to make a ... statement, today." Something sparked inside his dark eyes as he spoke, and Hitori found herself feeling a slight hint of curiosity.

"A statement," she repeated as she turned to look at Nisei again. The girl was standing close to Kouki and he appeared to be arguing with her, or trying to convince her of something. Whatever it was, the dark haired Anbu just shook her head and turned slightly away. Even from here, Hitori could see the look of frustration on the blonde Captain's face.

"Defeat her." Ruka's hand tightened on her shoulder, his nails almost digging into her skin. "Without mercy, without hesitation. You are Danzou's favored weapon, and today you will show everyone why." He smiled, though it never reached the depths of his enigmatic eyes, and his hand abruptly released her shoulder, before sliding slowly down her arm. "You are the perfect ninja."

As he stepped back, she bowed to him, then turned and bowed much lower to Danzou, showing her deepest respect and loyalty. Her feet carried her to the center of the field where she stopped and held her weapon out before her chest, signaling that she was ready to begin.

Nisei's head snapped up, and she turned back to Kouki for another moment before bowing to the Hokage, then slowly walking out to meet her opponent. Hitori kept her arm in the same position while she waited, the weapon never wavering at all. The black haired girl returned the salute, and they appraised each other silently as the rules were read: Taijutsu only, no edged weapons... Hitori blocked out the words, her mind focused only on the battle ahead, now.

At the signal to begin, her arm suddenly reversed, bringing the blade around in a blur of silver aimed straight for where Nisei's neck met her shoulder. The Anbu's eyes widened in surprise and she moved to the side, but Hitori's weapon still caught her shoulder hard, sending her to one knee. As Nisei was rising, Hitori had already moved and was behind the girl, her weapon lashing out to take the Anbu's unsteady feet out from underneath her before she could regain firm footing.

Nisei's golden eyes narrowed as she turned gracefully, avoiding the blade at the last moment and charging forward, their weapons meeting with a dull crash between their bodies. Hitori could see some sort of passion burning in those nearly metallic orbs, and she idly wondered how it was even possible to fight when you let your emotions rule you. She relaxed for a moment, letting the other girl push her back a step, and then leaned into Nisei's strike, sliding her blunted blade down the girl's weapon and turning away, bringing her own around in an almost invisible slash that slammed into the middle of the Anbu's back.

Nisei staggered forward, and Hitori was already moving again, almost dancing to the side, not yet using the full potential of her speed as she looked for a weakness to exploit. She noticed the nearly dazed look in the other girl's wide eyes as she suddenly closed with her again. The Anbu's blade made it up in time to block the blow, and she knocked Hitori's weapon aside, her foot coming up and catching the redhead in the center of her chest.

Hitori took the strike and let herself fall back, absorbing most of the impact as she hit the ground and rolled over backwards, leaping immediately to her feet, her weapon still firmly in her grasp. Her hand raised to catch Nisei's swing at her head and her own weapon collided hard with the Anbu's shoulder. Immediately after the hit, she reversed the blade, spinning completely in a circle, never loosing her grasp on the other's weapon and sending her own crashing into Nisei's opposite shoulder. Leaning back slightly, she lashed out with one foot, connecting solidly with the girl's chin and releasing Nisei's blade at the same time.

As the Anbu hit the ground, Hitori moved forward, crouching over her and holding the dulled tip of her blunted blade to the girl's unprotected throat. A long moment of silence passed as the two stared at each other. Nisei's golden eyes looked furious before they closed tightly. Hitori stood after the moderator called the match, and walked off the field, only stopping to bow to the Hokage before continuing on. Ruka stepped up beside her as she walked towards Danzou, and the redhead never looked back.

Hitori opened her eyes slowly, unable to shake the lingering sense of shame that persisted, even as the dream faded back into a memory. She felt vaguely ill remembering her own coldness on that day, her lack of any feeling whatsoever. How had she ever thought it was okay, much less better, to live that way? Shaking her head, she eased out of the bed, the chilly floor beneath her bare feet a welcome sensation. She'd thought it was okay because it was all she'd ever known. Whoever she'd been before Danzou found her half dead in the sand, that person was gone forever.

She moved to the door and carefully peered through it, walking out quietly when she didn't see anyone else. With silent steps, she moved quickly down the hallway, not stopping until she reached the door to the Kazekage's office. It was the middle of the night, and Hitori didn't expect anyone to be in there as she slipped through the door, and darted to the other one on the opposite side of the room. All she wanted was to be outside, on the roof, under the sky. She didn't know, or even really care why, it was just an instinct that demanded to be followed, and she gave in to it.

The cold wind bit through her clothes as she made her way to the railing and looked up. Thousands of stars seemed to wink down at her from the velvety blackness above. Far below, the faint light caught in the sand and shimmered with it's own pale luminescence. It was almost impossible to believe, in the peace of this moment, that out there, somewhere, a man she'd once respected and admired was now hunting her, determined to put an end to her life. She shivered a little as the wind swirled around her, tugging at her hair and clothes.

Gaara stood quietly at the top of the stairs, watching her as she gazed out over Suna. He'd followed her, unnoticed, after she ran through the office. It was a curious time for anyone to be awake, but it was a beautiful night to stand out under the stars, in spite of the chill from the unceasing wind. As he walked closer, she wrapped her arms around herself, her gaze still on some point far distant from where she was standing. He could tell that she knew he was there, but neither spoke as he stopped just behind her.

Hitori turned slowly and looked up at him, her arms falling to hang by her sides. Something about her eyes hinted at a deep sadness, even though he could see so many of the stars above reflecting in them. She raised one hand slowly as she took a step towards him, her fingers brushing over his face before settling on his shoulder, her eyes glancing away.

"I'm afraid to go back to sleep. I... don't want to be alone." The words were barely a whisper, and the wind gusting around tried to whip them away. It should have been more difficult for her to admit to such a feeling out loud, but as she raised her head to look at him, she realized that she could tell him anything, if she could find the right words. One of his arms closed around her, holding her gently against him, and she could feel the dormant strength in his body as he led her back inside, not stopping until they were in his room.

"Stay with me?" In the shadows of the dimly lit room, his turquoise eyes were almost the same color as the night sky.

Hitori nodded slowly, her eyes closing as he took her arms and eased her down onto the bed. Leaning over her, he kissed her softly then moved to lay beside her, smiling when she turned onto her side to look up at him. "I..."

His finger pressed gently against her lips, lingering there for a long moment before he pulled her into his arms. "Sleep. And when you wake up, I'll be right here." His hand brushed her hair away from her face before settling on her back again. "You won't be alone."

With a sigh, she relaxed into him, closing her eyes as she was surrounded by the warmth of his embrace and the soft scent from his clothes. Her hand settled on his chest near her face and she wondered, as unconsciousness crept slowly over her, if she would ever want, or even be able, to sleep alone again.

Gaara smiled, having the same thought as Hitori, at the same time. For several minutes, he laid awake, listening to the sounds of her even breathing, feeling the beating of her heart. When he finally closed his eyes, his arms reflexively tightened around her. A comfortable sense of contentment came from knowing that she would be the first thing he saw when he woke in the morning.

At the window, a shadow moved, dark eyes closing with silent laughter. It was amusing to watch these two children stumbling through playing at adult games. The man smirked as he leaped lightly to the ground and darted off. This was going to be even easier than he'd first thought it would be.

---------

"Great form," Nisei commented, as she watched her trainees. She'd set them to an easy task today, mostly for the sake of her recovery. They were learning how to focus their chakra into their kunai, to score perfect, direct hits on the trees in front of them. She felt bad for having left her three students abandoned and idle during her absence. Kouki hadn't had the chance to pick up the work of training them, since he was out and about as well, at Tsunade's request.

Ishida had a smirk on his face when he apprehended his newly returned sensei, and beamed precociously at her, "Ne, Nisei-sensei... I heard that you almost died. I couldn't believe such a rumor, so I punched that stupid Chuunin right in the face!"

Ayu let her stepped out of her stance as she turned on her heel to walk over towards Ishida, while Koji parted himself from the group to continue on with his training. When she reached Ishida, she stuck her hand out and flicked his ear, and then her voice gradually lowered as she spoke. "Are you dumb or something? That was all true. Nisei-sensei was defeated by that rogue black op that Konoha is still looking for..."

The Anbu captain's hands tightened into fists. It's not like she'd been weak at the time, it was just bad luck. She hadn't been prepared for Ruka, since the purpose of her mission was to simply spy on him. Then again, this was the man who'd been Hitori's teacher. Nisei's cheeks burned, remembering her awkward loss to the Root Anbu, which had been during a training exercise. After defeating Yomi, she had figured that facing Hitori would be easier, or perhaps equal. Partners were usually fairly evenly matched in terms of their abilities. It wasn't until Nisei was on the ground, and staring up into those empty green eyes, that she discovered she'd been dead wrong.

Ishida glanced over towards Nisei and arched a brow at her. Perhaps it wasn't a good time to tease her, but he couldn't help himself. "I always looked at you as someone who couldn't be touched, sensei. Now I see you differently." He turned away, struggling in vain to keep a smirk off of his face.

"I will gladly show you just how untouchable I am," Nisei teased right back. She really had missed being with them. It wasn't like she was a Jonin or anything. She had the freedom of giving her students a more relaxed training atmosphere than the usual Anbu routine, when she felt the occasion warranted it. "You and me, Ishida-kun. Even you two, Ayu and Koji. I will take all three of you on, separately or together."

For a moment, she could see their eyes light up, as if going up against their captain was a rare privilege they could barely wait to experience. Her cute students stood proud and ready in their Anbu formation and all Nisei could do was smile. She put both hands up and readied herself, when a cloud of smoke formed between her and the anxious Anbu. This time, she wasn't so surprised to see Kakashi there with an orange book in his hand, looking down at the pages as if his sudden appearance was perfectly normal. How lazy could one man be... ?

"Godaime wants to see you." Even his voice was lazy today, giving his words a tired, listless tone. It was obvious that Kakashi was displeased to discover Nisei wasn't where he expected her to be last night. Aside from the slightly lazier tone, he wasn't acting out of the ordinary, and therefore neither would she. With a nod, she looked over the three Anbu and made sure that they knew to continue studying chakra infused weapons. Her legs felt heavy as they carried her towards the large doors, and she was already dreading the conversation waiting for her as she exited Anbu headquarters.

Kakashi was close behind her, which was only what she expected. "All of the ninja and Anbu who went to save Gaara have been invited to Suna's upcoming festival. It wouldn't surprise me if that's what this is about."

"Does it matter? I won't be going." She didn't feel like going anywhere, especially for a festival. What would that entail exactly? Dressing up in clothes she would have to shop for, just to spend a few 'fun' hours trapped between Kouki and Kakashi, and their ridiculous testosterone fueled war, made no sense at all. It was depressing enough that Kakashi had left her during such a moment, acting so cool as he left. He couldn't be that ignorant of what he'd done to her. She really wanted to credit him with some intelligence.

"It would be rude to decline such a request from the Kazekage. Besides, I'm sure that Hitori is looking forward to you being there..." Why would he think Hitori wanted to see her? And why did Kakashi care what Nisei did or didn't do? She paused there, and watched him take a few steps in ahead of her before stopping. He didn't turn to look at her, already knowing that she was furious with him. Sure, there was an age gap between the two, and perhaps he wasn't as needy as the girl, but she should be able to understand him a hell of a lot better than she seemed to, lately.

"You don't understand me at all, do you?" She asked and this time he had to turn and look at her, surprised to hear her echoing his thoughts as he started to slowly walk towards her. Only mere inches away from her, he stopped. His hand paused, just poised to caress the side of her cheek. Nisei was fragile in more ways than one, and that was one of the reasons why he loved her. All of the emotions that Kakashi thought had been destroyed, or taken from him, were living inside of her. What he had lost the night Rin died had been placed inside Nisei. That was what he truly believed.

"You like playing games, too. Just like Kouki. You two are perfect for each other." He caught her wrist in his raised hand before she could move to shove him away. She couldn't take her eyes from his face once she had been pulled in against him. "You gave me your answer just to run away from me. Not only did you leave, but you ran straight to Kouki. What kind of games are these? What kind of reaction are you looking for, Nisei?" Kakashi leaned closer to her, lowering his voice to a tone more suited to intimacy than confrontation. "Is this what you imagined...?"

Less than a breath later, before the shudder that started with his voice finished passing through her, she found herself slammed against the rough wall of the building behind her. Kakashi's eye narrowed at her, as both of her hands closed around his arm holding her to the surface by the top of her gray vest. Slowly, his slender fingers went up to his forehead protector, and he pushed it up above his eyebrow. With both eyes fixed on her, he watched her's widen fearfully, the gold paling as she helplessly stared back. He could feel her heart pounding as her body wracked with chills.

"Are you scared, Nisei...? This is the attention you wanted from me." His eyes narrowed, displaying his obvious aggravation with the entire situation. Even if they were in a vacant area, he had to push his thoughts aside as he leaned down to press his lips forcefully to hers. The soft sound that escaped her merited a smirk, and he was all too aware of the curves of her body fitting against his own. He could feel the grip she had on his arm start to loosen before her hands slowly dropped down.

The Jonin pulled back slightly, leaving the Anbu captain with a heaving chest and little air to breathe. "Even if you two are perfect for each other. You've given me your answer and I'm not letting him have you." He gave her another meaningful push into the wall, before his fingers untangled from her clothing. Black and red eyes seemed amused by the mess he'd made out of her. Hopefully, this would end the games between them. It was becoming a little frustrating to feel like he had to try to read her mind. "You'd do well to remember that."

He left her there abruptly and headed back towards his current task, which was to prepare Naruto for the ordeals ahead of him. With the news of Orochimaru dead, he was certain that there would be an even bigger, more important mission soon looming on the horizon. Nisei snapped out of her stupor, her thoughts racing as she tried to remember which direction the Hokage building was in. It was an effort that made her feel almost pathetic, and she fumed silently as she walked. That the Jonin could affect her so easily as to disorganize her mind to this degree, was nearly maddening. She made her way through the doors, up the steps and inside, trying to regain her former calmness. She wasn't surprised to see Shizune hovering outside Tsunade's office.

"Nisei-chan, it is nice to see you. I hope that you're doing well." The Anbu gave a slight nod, as she headed right in without a second glance at the aide. Shizune and Nisei had an understanding, even if it was an impatient one. To put it simply, they couldn't stand each other, but maintained a polite fiction whenever they were forced to meet. It was probably something petty, Nisei realized. When it came to Shizune and Tsunade, things could all too easily be very petty.

Tsunade stood at the window, looking out over her village. Her voice had a bite to it when she said the girl's name. "Nisei."

"Lady Hokage..." Nisei knew what was coming, having been preparing for days for this eventual argument, and would have to bear it, even more than she had with anyone else. The Anbu captain went down to her knee, and bowed respectfully. What she didn't expect, were the two hands that brought her gently up to her feet. Tsunade's topaz eyes looked at her with a mixture of both anger and sadness. Nisei expected the yelling to begin, and closed her eyes as she waited, but it never came.

Stepping away from the Anbu, Tsunade returned to her desk, as the girl's golden eyes fluttered open again, in shock. "Welcome back, Nisei. I have a new mission for you." Her tone was confident, knowing Nisei couldn't decline now, not with what had just happened. To raise someone up from the floor demanded respect, and for someone like the Hokage to lift her up from the floor, was unheard of. Tsunade retrieved the folded paper from her desk. "This is a formal invitation from the Kazekage. He has requested your presence at the Sand's Tanabata festival, and I want you to go."

"Then I will do it." This time, Nisei kept both her bow, and her reply, short.

In a light whisper, Tsunade's words were barely audible, though Nisei's ears caught them easily. "...You are dismissed..."

The moment she reached the door, her hand tightened against the wooden frame as she looked over her shoulder at the seemingly confused Hokage. It was possible that guilt caused the invisible weight that seemed to press down upon the blonde's tired body. Nisei couldn't help but speak out of line, just this once. "You know, none of this was your fault. You are my lady, and I willingly do as you ask, for you and for my village. Even if it means dying, then my death would be justified. Thank you for the strength that has come from this..."

Tsunade's head snapped up, to see an empty doorframe, with just the sunlight barely filtering through it. The Anbu Captain was already gone. She turned towards the window and watched the shadows flee from the walls of the Hokage building, feeling herself smiling for the first time since that accident.

---------

End of chapter. Thanks for reading.


	21. 降伏 Surrender Part I

Author's Note:

Yomi: *clutches Chapter Twenty tightly to his chest* It saddens me greatly to part with even half of this, but I'm sure you guys want to read it as much as I want to keep it. So, I'm reluctantly willing to give up half of it at a time *slaps at Ibuki's hands*  
Ibuki: I want to read it too, Yomi kun ^_^  
Yomi: You'll have to read it with everyone else, neko boy. Anyway, guys, Lisa and Amy wanted me to thank you again for the hits and reviews. And we do sincerely hope you're enjoying the story very much... *trails off, staring at Ibuki*  
Ibuki: *blushing madly* oh.. this is a GOOD chapter!!  
Yomi: *grins* Yes, yes it is. *wistful sigh*  
Ibuki: *sticks a warning label to Yomi's forehead*  
Yomi: Baka! That was for the chapter!  
Ibuki: I know ^^ but it suits you, too.

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Moon's Light, Reality's Dream  
月の光、うつつの夢  
Chapter Twenty, Part I - 降伏 (_Surrender_)

滲み霞む君の姿が 闇に消えてしまわないように_  
Your figure grows hazy in a blur_. _Don't disappear into the darkness_  
月よ光もっと輝き 照らして_  
The light of the moon becomes more radiant,_ _and illuminates it._

Yomi twitched where he stood next to Ibuki, feeling more than a little ridiculous in the black kimono, and black and white hakama he and Ibuki were both wearing. "I feel like origami," he muttered as the group from Konoha finally became visible. It was just past noon, and had been over two hours since the other Anbu hurried him into his clothes to come meet the guests. Yomi wouldn't admit to it, but he was tired, cranky, and nervous, though the nervousness only came from his uncertain status with Konoha.

"I must agree. You do look a little strange in hakama, Yomi kun." Ibuki smiled down at his friend and then turned his eyes back to the group approaching. The tiny Anbu made a rude noise and stared at the ground, finding himself wishing that just once Ibuki would look less than perfect in some way. He wouldn't get that wish today, however, as his friend stood there looking like he dressed so formally every day, and in fact, had been born to do so.

'Bastard,' Yomi thought venomously as he started pacing for the sixth time in ten minutes. Finally, after what seemed like forever, the guests walked up to the tower, and the two Anbu bowed to them in unison. Ibuki immediately ran over to Kouki and began gesturing animatedly, though Yomi hung back a little, his eyes roaming over the group in front of him. There was some sort of nearly visible tension thrumming in the air between Kouki, Nisei, and Kakashi. The dark haired Anbu Captain looked tired and frustrated as a few other people ran up and the group began slowly splitting apart, all except for those three, immediately led off to their various rooms. Obviously, Ibuki would take care of them.

Nisei's golden eyes met his as he backed slowly away, and Yomi wondered if she was also remembering that training match where she'd beaten him so thoroughly, and with such ease. Uncomfortable now, he turned and darted off, feeling his pulse pounding as he tried to figure out the best way to keep his distance from the Konoha guests. For at least the next few hours they would be resting, and then preparing for the festival, so all he had to do was lay low. Once the celebration began, it would be easy avoid attention in the crowd of people. Nodding to himself, the tiny Anbu slipped into his room and pushed the door shut, finally relaxing a little.

As a messenger ran out of Gaara's office, Kankurou glanced inside at his brother, and saw him exactly as he expected to: leaned over his desk and gazing down at the paper in his hand, his mind and eyes completely occupied by the work of being the Kazekage. It was a strange image to put alongside of what he'd seen when he'd walked into the redhead's room this morning, but that's what Kankurou's mind insisted upon doing. Remembering the sight of Gaara asleep with Hitori in his arms made him smile to himself as he entered the office. It fit. Nothing else was a satisfying answer. She belonged there.

"Any news?" He eased into the chair he habitually left in front of the desk and propped one elbow on the wooden surface, resting his chin in his hand as his dark eyes glanced over the redhead.

"No, it's been strangely quiet." His eyes still on the paperwork he was shuffling through his hands, Gaara frowned and then shook his head before finally looking up at his brother. "Not even the usual reports of random rogue attacks near the border."

"Of course not. Ruka's got them all organized, now. He won't move until he decides it's the right moment." Their eyes remained locked together, both wearing looks of worry mixed with consternation.

"I can't help but wonder if this festival will present him with just such an opportunity." The redhead's turquoise eyes returned to the papers in front of him and silence crept in to fill the room. Kankurou leaned back in his chair, idly chewing on his finger as his eyes roamed around before settling on Gaara again. Sometimes when he looked at his brother, especially when Gaara was hard at work and dressed the part of the Kazekage, it was difficult to remember that this was his younger brother. "The patrols have been increased, but I'm certain the attack won't come until morning." With a sigh, Gaara let the paper he'd been reading fall and rested his forehead in his hand. "It only makes sense to wait until we're more likely to be unprepared."

"What about-"

"I think he's already here." Those aqua eyes now held a hint of anger, and were narrower than before as they settled on the puppet user.

Kankurou's head snapped up at Gaara's words, and he felt his jaw dropping open. "What?"

"There have been a few reports over the last couple of days from the black ops." Straightening again, he leaned back in his chair and rested the fingers of one hand against his lower lip, tapping a little as he was wont to do when thinking deeply. "Nothing concrete, but they're certain they've been sighting unusual strangers in and around Sunagakure." He started to add more, but paused when Ibuki appeared in the doorway and knocked softly against the frame.

"The guests have arrived, Kazekage sama, and are settled in their rooms." The Anbu bowed and turned to leave, but stopped when Kankurou slowly rose from his seat and approached him, leaning close.

"You haven't forgotten what we spoke about earlier... ?" He let the question trail off, his voice low, so that only the two of them would hear what he said.

"I have not," Ibuki answered gravely, the look on his face matching perfectly to the tone of his voice. The two stared at each other for a long moment before Kankurou nodded, and Ibuki bowed slightly before exiting the room.

Gaara eyed his brother over the top of the paper in his hand, acting as if he hadn't been paying attention, but curious as to what the puppet user was up to. It wasn't like Kankurou to be circumspect or secretive about anything, unless he knew what he was doing would likely cause an argument between them. His fingers resumed their rhythmic drumming against his mouth as he watched his brother leave without saying another word. Whatever Kankurou had going on, Gaara probably wasn't going to like it.

--

Temari settled her hands gently on Hitori's shoulders and smiled at her. "Are you ready to see?"

The redhead bit her lower lip, feeling beyond uncomfortable in the unfamiliar clothes and shoes, and oddly bare without her long hair cascading down her back. She gave a short nod and closed her eyes as the blonde turned her. Once Temari's hands dropped away, Hitori took a deep breath and began slowly opening her eyes. They widened in shock a moment later as a stranger stared back at her from the mirror.

The girl in the glass had the same red hair, only it was intricately twisted on top of her head and held in place by a long silver pin that had a row of flower shaped bells dangling from it. Her green eyes seemed brighter, and maybe even mysterious thanks to the thin lines of black Temari had drawn at the edges of their lids. And the clothes... She glanced down at herself, then back to the mirror, amazed that there was such a difference in the way her body looked in the yukata. Her curves _curved_, and the obi cinched around her waist amplified her slender shape in all the right ways. For the first time she could remember, she didn't look like a ninja, just a girl.

"I..." Words refused to come for a long moment, choking up in her throat, and she turned away from the mirror, glancing up to Temari with a small smile. "Thank you."

"You're very welcome," the blonde laughed softly and reached out to tuck a stray strand of hair behind the Anbu's ear. "I can't wait to see what the others think... " She glanced over at Hitori with her head still turned in profile to the girl. "Especially Gaara."

Hitori felt heat flaming up in her cheeks as she looked down at the floor, shifting as nervousness crept over her. What would Gaara think, to see her this way?

"Let's not keep him waiting," Temari said softly as she took the girl's hand and led her from the room. Hitori's eyes stayed lowered as they walked towards the Kazekage's office, only raising when she realized someone else had started walking beside her. Temari released Hitori's hand and continued on ahead to the door.

"Ne, senpai, you look amazing." Ibuki's voice was soft beside her, and she smiled a little at him, her eyes darting away to the floor again, still feeling slightly uncomfortable. He held his hand out towards her, displaying a tiny paper crane resting on his palm. "Perhaps it's foolish, but I want you to have this."

She looked up at him as she lifted the delicately folded paper from his hand. It was a lovely shade of green, with light purple and white swirled through it, and so small, she couldn't imagine the patience it must've taken to fold it so perfectly.

"It's a wish." His head tipped to the side, and he scratched at it nervously. "My wish for all of your wishes to come true." Soft laughter accompanied his words as he gestured towards the office and slowly resumed walking. "That's the point of Tanabata, right? Wishes."

"Thank you, Ibuki kun." Hitori's hand closed gently around it. "I don't think it's foolish." They reached the doorway as she finished speaking and he smiled brightly, his pale blue eyes creasing upwards. Just as she was about to walk in, his hand rested lightly on her arm for a moment.

"Senpai, if it's not too forward, if you have a free moment at the festival... May I have a dance with you?" The way he kept his head lowered as he asked, she couldn't see the look on his face, but the request took her completely by surprise.

"I don't know how to dance... " There would be dancing? All of this was so strange, the work and effort involved in dressing, the decorations and little gestures, dancing... She wondered if it would all overwhelm her before it even began. Being a member of the Foundation suddenly seemed much simpler than trying to lead a normal life.

"It would be fun to learn, ne?" Ibuki was still looking away from her, and she wondered if he thought she was just trying to find a polite way to say no. It made her feel even more uncomfortable.

"Hai," she said softly as his head raised again. "It would be fun to learn." He flashed her another bright smile and nodded. Feeling better now, she turned back to the doorway and followed Temari into Gaara's office. Kankurou walked in behind them and nearly choked when his eyes settled on Hitori, making her flush lightly and resume staring at the floor. The noise caused Gaara to finally lift his head and his eyes slowly widened as he rose from his chair.

Out of the corner of her eye, Hitori could see Temari leaned against the wall with her arms crossed over her chest and smirking in a very satisfied way at the reactions her handiwork was receiving. A moment later, the blonde grabbed Kankurou's sleeve and dragged him out of the room. The puppet user attempted to stutter through a protest, until his eyes met his sister's, then he immediately shut up and followed her out. Temari's soft laughter could be heard as the door closed quietly behind them.

Gaara wasn't even aware he'd risen from his seat, much less started moving, until he was just a few steps away from her. He wondered if she knew just how exotic the change in appearance made her look as she slowly raised her head to meet his gaze. His hand lifted to brush over the side of her face, and he smiled to see the same innocence as always in her eyes, and the light blush on her cheeks. Even as uncomfortable as she obviously was, she looked stunning.

"Hitori, you-" A soft knock at the door cut him off a moment before it was opened by a messenger.

"It's time, Kazekage sama. They're waiting for you." He bowed and backed out again, and Gaara sighed softly, turning his attention back to Hitori.

"Ready?" he asked, that same smile still causing the corners of his mouth to turn up. At her slight nod he took her hand and led her through the door, along the deserted hallways, and finally to the doors out of the tower itself. The shadows were thick around them as twilight deepened outside, and he pulled her close, lifting her face to his to kiss her softly. "You look beautiful," he whispered against her lips as he drew away from her, knowing that once they walked out the door, he wasn't likely to get another chance any time soon.

His hand slid into hers again, their fingers lacing tightly together as he pushed open the door. Hitori's eyes locked onto his face as they stepped out and the sounds from the gathered crowd slowly dwindled to silence.

The next several minutes, Hitori was certain, would always be nothing more than a blur in her memory. Nisei was standing off to the side with Kouki and Kakashi, and Hitori instinctively turned towards the girl, wanting to speak with her, but unsure of how to approach her. She'd never attended a festival before, much less in the company of someone as important as Gaara, and when a smiling Ibuki appeared at her side, offering her his arm, she felt a huge sense of relief at the chance to escape the press of so many people. As they walked over to the chairs set aside nearby, she missed the look the Anbu shared with Kankurou, along with the puppet user's short nod and grim smile. Her eyes scanned around for Yomi, and she was disappointed when she didn't see him anywhere.

Even though he was surrounded by people speaking to him, Gaara watched her go, and he noticed the meaningful glance that passed between his brother and the Anbu. So that's what Kankurou was up to. He looked over at Hitori again, where she was sitting with Ibuki, paying careful attention as the Anbu spoke and gestured, pointing at certain things or people. Apparently, the puppet user had given Ibuki the task of 'accompanying' Hitori for the evening, knowing that Gaara's attention would be forcefully divided, and not wanting to risk her being left alone for even a moment. The redhead smiled before he turned back to the man who was speaking to him, relaxing a little now that he knew he had one less worry.

Yomi watched from the shadows a little further away from the mass of 'important people' as he had been doing for the last hour, or so, since the festival started. His eyes roamed slowly over the Konoha group, then Kankurou, nodding to himself as he watched the puppet user's eyes darting all around, never settling on any one person for too long. It seemed they were expecting trouble, which they probably thought would come in the form of Ruka. His eyes rolled a little at the thought, then settled on Hitori and Ibuki, and he felt his mouth twist in a frown he couldn't stop. A surge of irrational anger passed through him as he wondered why they suddenly felt he wasn't good enough to protect the girl who'd been his partner for so long. Through his mental fuming he didn't notice right away that Kankurou was beside him, though once he did, he still refused to tear his eyes away from Hitori.

"You're angry." There was a hint of amusement in the puppet user's quiet voice, and it only caused the ire simmering within Yomi to grow as he turned and glared at the man he considered a friend.

"Goddamned right I'm angry." His gaze went back to Hitori to see Ibuki taking her hand and pulling her to her feet, the pair walking over to look at some of the decorations that seemed to adorn everything. Her hand reached out to touch a delicate chain of paper cranes before she turned to smile up at the Anbu, and Yomi leaned back against the wall, his emotions going in what felt like a million different directions now. "Why _him_?"

"Because you know Ruka." Kankurou crossed his arms over his chest and waited for Yomi's brown eyes to meet his before continuing on. "Ibuki doesn't know Ruka, but Hitori trusts him. So doesn't it make sense that your attention isn't distracted by keeping her company, and remains free to observe everything around you?" He idly scratched at his head, then smiled a little at the tiny Anbu. "I'd rather she didn't figure out what we're up to. She'd be angry."

"She'd kick your ass," Yomi agreed, feeling a tiny smirk starting to tug at the corners of his lips. He tried to calm himself down, but when Ibuki led a protesting, yet still smiling Hitori towards where people were dancing, that irrational anger flared in him again. His gaze narrowed as he watched the Anbu positioning them and after they stumbled through the first few steps, he turned away. "You're crazy. There's no way in hell Ruka's gonna try anything with this many people around." Livid topaz eyes raised to meet Kankurou's dark stare. "He wants quiet, and no risk of interruptions while he... " The words trailed off when the tiny Anbu found himself unable to complete either the thought or the sentence.

"That doesn't mean he isn't watching." Kankurou had already turned away and gone back to scanning intently over the crowds. "Do you think he'd let an opportunity pass if one appeared?"

"I think you don't know Ruka." A soft sigh escaped him as he found his own eyes darting around in search of that all too familiar, cold face. "This is very personal for him." Without waiting for an answer, Yomi walked off slowly, searching for somewhere to get a drink. The way he felt tonight, alcohol wasn't just a pleasant diversion, but more of a necessity. Something to blunt the insanely conflicted emotions that erupted within him whenever his eyes fell on Hitori. A short, slightly uncomfortable conversation with Kouki, and briefly Nisei, didn't do much for him either, and he stalked over to lean against another wall, surrendering to the thoughts that insisted upon filling his mind.

He'd finally admitted to himself that he loved her, but only now was he starting to realize that he'd never really accepted it before he'd pushed his feelings aside. Hitori loved Gaara, and that emotion was returned. It was apparent every time they looked at each other, and even though it hurt, Yomi would quietly break his own heart for the sake of her happiness. Her soft laughter made his head snap up, and he couldn't turn away fast enough to prevent the return of that all consuming fury. Ibuki's arm was tight around the redhead's waist, holding her against him as he laughed with her. Hitori's hand gripped onto his arm almost desperately, and from the odd angle of her body, it was obvious she'd nearly fallen. It was a completely innocent moment, and they separated once she regained her feet to walk back towards the chairs they'd been sitting in before, but that one second image was burned into Yomi's mind.

If Gaara didn't exist, it would be impossible to deny the _perfection_ of the picture his two closest friends made together. The urge to hit something was overwhelming, and since he couldn't take out his rage on the object he most wanted to, being Ibuki's face, the two drinks he lifted would have to be a start towards induced apathy. He finished one immediately, wincing as the alcohol burned on the way down and made his eyes water, and started on the second without hesitation. Just as he took two more cups in his hands, he noticed Nisei approaching him and took a deep breath, deciding by the look on her face that she might be the only person whose presence he could tolerate, tonight. The next drink disappeared as quickly as the two before it.

"Misery loves company, ne?" the tiny Anbu muttered under his breath as his feet carried him towards the black haired Captain.

At the fringes of the crowd, a robed figure rested briefly against a wall, his long legs drawn up under his body and the mass of loose fabric to conceal his unusual height. The same type of scarf the residents of Suna habitually wore hid all of his hair and most of his face. He wasn't the only one dressed this way, and therefore didn't attract any attention to himself. Dark eyes roamed slowly over Hitori, his gaze growing even darker as he watched her laugh. They were smart to leave the girl with a guard, though that flamboyant Anbu was an amusing choice. He'd expected it to be Yomi, if anyone, and idly wondered where the tiny idiot was. Maybe Gaara was smarter than he'd given him credit for. His eyes roamed over everything, and everyone, as he patiently watched, and waited. When Gaara turned to approach Hitori, Ruka rose, keeping his body hunched over and his knees slightly bent as he moved slowly to a new location. The perfect opportunity would present itself eventually, and when it did, he would strike.

Gaara found himself finally free for the moment, and his eyes immediately glanced around for Hitori, spotting her sitting with Ibuki not too far away. Her gaze fell on him and he smiled as he started walking towards her. The fireworks would begin soon, which gave him the perfect excuse to draw her away from the crowd, and selfishly steal her time and attention for himself.

Ibuki went quiet as Gaara approached them and smiled, rising to his feet. "Ne senpai, thank you." He bowed a little, then straightened again, smiling even more as she turned questioning eyes to him. "It was fun, getting to spend some time with you that didn't involve you beating me up!" Pale blue eyes creased up as she laughed softly at him.

"I had fun, too." She started to say something else, but the words died in her throat when Gaara's shadow fell over her. As the redhead pulled Hitori to her feet, Ibuki melted away without another sound, searching for Kouki then walking towards him the moment his bright blonde hair became visible.

"Let's go up to the roof. It's noisy and crowded here, and the fireworks will be brighter up there." He leaned his head to the side a little, almost as if he expected her to argue. Hitori ducked her head as her lips parted, but a loud noise drew her eyes to the sky as the first of the hanabi exploded in a brilliant shower of blue and white sparks over their heads. Gaara smiled as her eyes widened at the sight before she looked back to him and nodded.

He took her hand as he glanced around, then led her away from the crowd. They passed through the tower in silence, and once they stepped out on the roof, she hugged herself at the chill in the air. Hitori continued forward as flower of light seemed to bloom all around them, but paused when she felt soft fabric closing around her. The lingering warmth from his body that remained trapped in the cloth sent a shiver through her, making her eyes fall closed.

Gaara's hands fell from Hitori's shoulders after settling his white cloak around her. The black fabric of her yukata alone was too little with the night continuing to grow colder. As they sat down, the loud cracks of the fireworks seemed further away, though the sparks constantly lit up the sky around them. Up here with Gaara, Hitori found it hard to pay attention to anything other than him. Ironically, the Kazekage hadn't brought the Anbu to the roof just to watch the fireworks. There were many things that he wanted to discuss with her, things stirred in him by some uneasiness that grew from a mixture of the deepening sadness he saw in her eyes, and a change in the air that felt like nothing more than an omen of impending darkness. But, when he tried to speak, he found the words hard to produce, especially when her emerald gaze rested expectantly on him.

At that moment, Hitori could acutely feel the unusual pull their bodies seem to have to each other. Without the jacket, she let her eyes roam curiously over him and wasn't surprised to see the fishnet that most of ninja wore beneath their cloaks. She could see more of his pale skin, now. It was the most she'd ever seen of him before, and she couldn't stop the slight blush that rose in her cheeks. He looked so flawless... Was he even real?

"We're like fireworks, aren't we?" He asked, as he tore his gaze away from the sky to watch her more closely. "Our feelings for each other continue to burst into other feelings that start small but always expand. It can't be explained, and almost seems irrational, these emotions."

"Fireworks fade, though, and they die out, no matter how brightly they burn at first." The moment she finished speaking, she felt the soft brush of his fingertips as he turned her face towards him. The way he looked at her tonight was slightly different than before, his eyes darkened by something more, something that was foreign to her in many ways. His hand dropped down to rest firmly against the side of her neck as he leaned in and kissed her, keeping her lips pressed to his.

This was the only place that he found true solace. He was sure of it, now. The moment he tasted her, he was lost, and he took her mouth slowly, running his tongue between her lips, parting them to kiss her deeply. She inhaled sharply, as having her breath stolen left her slightly dizzy and clinging to him, with her short nails digging into his back. He pulled away, his lips brushing against hers as their eyes met. She looked helpless with that wide, innocent gaze fixed on him.

There was quite a noticeable difference in Gaara, now. He brought his hand up to the long silver pin holding her hair in place, and slid it free. The long, dark mass of it fell around her shoulders in slight waves, framing the curves of her face. He found a particular part, and ran his slim fingers through the thick crimson tresses. Maybe there was only one way to convey his feelings to this girl, who had such a hard time expressing herself. She closed her jade eyes when he leaned in again, and their noses touched gently as he paused, his lips not even an inch away from her mouth.

"You're so beautiful..." The blatant emotion in his deep voice struck something inside of her that made her ache. His every touch, the feel of his soft lips, the way he looked at her, even the feeling of his skin through the holes in his shirt all contributed to the need that was starting to burn within her. The compliment itself, though, caused her eyes to flutter open, just as his mouth closed over hers again, drawing her bottom lip in between his teeth.

The impact from the pressure he used forced the Anbu to lie back against the surface of the high roof, and his body followed hers down. The Kazekage jacket that fell away from her shoulders was at least a little softer than what she would have been lying on without it. She let out a gasp as he released her lips and moved to the side of her neck. Her body tingled as she arched up against him, squirming beneath him without even thinking. His kisses were warm and moist, the sounds of his mouth moving over her skin continuously resounding in her ears.

Following behind his lips, the soft tips of his fingers trailed, teasing across her collarbone and into the hollow where her pulse was pounding rapidly. After the light skim of his nails, she felt his tongue there, making her hands grip tighter onto his shoulders. His response was to move further up her body, their hips meeting in earnest. Even though neither of them had ever experienced these things before, Gaara didn't hesitate, and was very much aware of what he was doing, the more she reacted to him.

He looked up at her face as his hands moved to the obi tied behind her back. The heat in her cheeks was stirring, possibly causing him to want her even more now, as he pulled the wide belt away. All this time, he'd wondered if Hitori would revert to being cold, and be unable to react this way, and he was sure that she had felt the same about herself. Gaara couldn't stop the words from leaving his lips as he thought them. "You're much warmer than you think..."

She felt the breeze wash over her skin when his hands slid into the yukata and pushed the fabric slowly open to fall at her sides. His eyes met hers as he slid it off of her shoulders and she drew her arms out of the wide sleeves. The chill didn't last, as his body covered hers again almost immediately. He was warm against her, and it was almost odd to feel the rough material of his shirt on her sensitive skin as his mouth started to consume her, the soft whispers of his kisses amplified in her ears again. She'd never in her life felt unworthy, or embarrassed, but she couldn't help being worried now, that maybe she really wasn't good enough for him.

"Gaara..." She felt his teeth nip at the skin just below her shoulder before his warm tongue ran over the increasingly red mark. He took his time, encouraged by her soft sighs and the way she barely whispered his name. She was more than what he'd imagined, and it nearly drove him insane. Her long legs... Gaara had often pictured them positioned in a particular way - he forced them around his waist, and let his hands slide with almost painful slowness down the milk pale skin as he returned his attention to her raised flesh.

His mouth closed down over her chest, causing her body to arch up, with one hand beside her on the hard surface, and the other buried in his unruly hair. She couldn't open her eyes, knowing what she would see if she were to look at him. The sounds were proof, as his mouth pulled gently at each side, every stroke of his tongue making her body shudder with chills. The cool air swept over the moist spots he'd left on her ivory skin, now forming into his personal reminders, proud bruised ones.

"Please...I'm not sure... what... this feeling... I need it... to... stop..." As the words haltingly escaped her lips, her legs pressed inward, unable to close with him between them. Gaara pulled back, with his head leaned towards his shoulder. A small smile played across his lips, as he ran his fingers down the flat length of her stomach and watched as she tensed. The last barrier she'd been wearing slid from her body and off of her legs, then he slowly started on his own clothing.

Even now she was the same stubborn Hitori. The thought made him smile, though it was interrupted by him starting to wonder if he would lose her in the near future. Ruka would, without a doubt, strike sometime soon. Once the thoughts started to plague him, he found himself unable to make them stop. It was possible that Hitori would die, like butterflies often do when they're lost in the sand. She'd accepted Suna's help, his help, but still, her chances... He let the black shirt fall to the side as his hands lowered to his pants, removing them with deliberate slowness, and he returned to her when there was nothing left between them, one hand raising to brush against the side of her face.

Sometimes, it's necessary to hurt the one you love. Even when there are no secrets left to reveal, something always remains hidden. Gaara kissed her again, his tongue delving between her lips, to distract her from the pain that he was about to bring upon her, imminent now, as he pressed himself against her and felt her body's resistance. Falling away from the kiss, Hitori's teeth closed down on her lower lip, and bit hard, her eyes squeezing shut just as she felt his hips move forward. Her long limbs wrapped tightly around him, her legs trembling, and all she could register was an uncomfortable sensation of pressure, and a rush of sudden warmth.

The part of her that needed to feel something only ached even more when she felt his hips draw away, before he filled her once again. He let out a low sound, his darkened aqua eyes closing tightly against the heat around him. With one hand beside her waist and the other above her shoulder, he started to rock in and out slowly, as her gasps of discomfort gradually changed, and eased into sighs. Covering her mouth with his own, unable to concentrate for too long as he pulsed with pleasure, he decided that perhaps Hitori was perfect, and an absolute necessity to him.

"How does it feel... ?" Their lips touched with his every word once Gaara found his voice. "...Better now?" He sounded almost impatient as her eyes opened to look at him, and she found this new, different expression on his face to be extremely attractive. How had she never consciously connected the word beautiful with him before?

He pushed in deeper, while she desperately searched her scattering thoughts for an answer. A quick nod would have to suffice, and it did, as he continued with the constant pressure, moving in now pleasurable, yet still vaguely uncomfortable ways. She held on as her body started to move on its own, together with his, and she tried to wrap her mind around it. She didn't want to let go of him, and at the same time, she needed to let go. Selfishly, she almost wished to be torn away from him, so that if, or when, she failed to live, she wouldn't leave something behind.

The precious treasures that others kept... Hitori finally realized why she'd never kept any for herself. Anbu didn't need possessions when their lives were so likely to lead only to sudden, early death. This was different, though, being one with him in this way, and it was something not even death could take from either of them. Her hand slid up to the back of his neck, and she pulled him to her, kissing him hard and letting go of everything that tried to distract her from this moment. As their movements grew more urgent, and more frantic, so did her actions. She felt across his sides with her legs when he slammed in. Like a stab, it struck something inside of her, the place where she was burning, where she needed to feel him the most. Her lips parted, the kiss slowing as she moaned against his mouth. His hips continued to move in the same manner, and he felt her crumbling beneath him.

"Nh... Gaara..." The way she voiced his name sent a shiver through him, and he raised his hand to her neck, closing it gently, as he thrust harder against the tightly clenched muscles. Her body squeezed him, forcing him closer to the edge as her slow kisses moved from beneath his chin, back to his lips. With a low groan, he pressed his mouth to hers, and swallowed the sounds that spilled from both of them.

The feeling came up from her thighs, and grew closer to her core, a pleasure that seemed infinitely beyond even the best sorts of pain she'd experienced. His dark eyes watched hers as she willed them to stay open, and she stilled, arching up a little when her climax overwhelmed her, drawing another cry from her. Gaara followed quickly after, with his knuckles white at her side, and his other hand falling from her neck. She held him tightly against her as he buried his face in the crook of her neck, shuddering.

It wasn't long before their hearts began to calm into a steady rhythm once more, and she allowed her eyes to close as his lips brushed slowly across her skin. "Aishiteru..."

"Aishiteru," Hitori whispered, a light blush coloring her cheeks as she moved her fingers just as slowly in his red hair. Hearing it, and saying it, meant so much more now.

Opening her eyes again, she saw the stars looking back at her from the dark night sky. She could just barely make out the fireworks, even though they were still bursting in plain sight. Everything seemed colorless, except for this man in her arms. On the heels of that thought, she felt a deep stirring of the ache of loss budding within her, and almost angrily tried to force it away, tears threatening to form in her eyes. Why was it so difficult to hold on to the good feelings... ?

He shifted a little and leaned up, his face blocking out the sight of the heavens above, and the story Temari had told her came back to her, suddenly. Orihime and Hikoboshi¹, the two lovers in the stars who were only able to meet once a year, on this day. The tears she'd been trying so hard to hold back spilled over as that tiny spark of sorrow inside her seemed to grow. Gaara frowned a little in concern, and his lips parted, but Hitori pulled him to her, and kissed him before he could speak. Her heart ached when she found herself wishing it didn't feel so much like a goodbye.

_'I wish... '_

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¹ Footnote: Tanabata was inspired by the famous Chinese folklore, The Princess and the Cowherd:

Orihime (Weaving Princess), daughter of the Tentei (Sky King, or the universe itself), wove beautiful clothes by the bank of the Amanogawa (Milky Way, lit. "heavenly river"). Her father loved the cloth that she wove and so she worked very hard every day to weave it. However, Orihime was sad that because of her hard work she could never meet and fall in love with anyone. Concerned about his daughter, Tentei arranged for her to meet Hikoboshi (Cow Herder Star) (also referred to as Kengyuu) who lived and worked on the other side of the Amanogawa. When the two met, they fell instantly in love with each other and married shortly thereafter. However, once married, Orihime would no longer weave cloth for Tentei and Hikoboshi allowed his cows to stray all over Heaven. In anger, Tentei separated the two lovers across the Amanogawa and forbade them to meet. Orihime became despondent at the loss of her husband and asked her father to let them meet again. Tentei was moved by his daughter's tears and allowed the two to meet on the 7th day of the 7th month, if Orihime worked hard and finished her weaving. The first time they tried to meet, however, they found that they could not cross the river because there was no bridge. Orihime cried so much that a flock of magpies came and promised to make a bridge with their wings so that she could cross the river. It is said that if it rains on Tanabata, the magpies cannot come, and the two lovers must wait another year to meet.

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End of chapter. Thanks for reading!


	22. 降伏 Surrender Part II

Author's Note: The second half of Chapter Twenty! We'd like to very sincerely thank you all for the hits and the reviews, once again. It's amazing to know when the story is being enjoyed so much. Hope you enjoy this half, as well.

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Moon's Light, Reality's Dream  
月の光、うつつの夢  
Chapter Twenty, Part II - 降伏 (_Surrender_)

滲み霞む君の姿が 闇に消えてしまわないように_  
Your figure grows hazy in a blur_. _Don't disappear into the darkness_

月よ光もっと輝き 照らして_  
The light of the moon becomes more radiant,_ _and illuminates it._

It was late in the evening when Nisei was finally able to escape the awkwardness that consisted of blinding lights and loud noises, company that she'd rather not know and inquiring attention that she'd prefer wasn't focused on her. In the past, she'd easily avoided occasions like these, since there had always been something more important to do. Now, feeling uncomfortable in a purple and white checkered kimono, she found herself wanting to leave sooner than intended, and wondering if she could disappear without drawing attention to her absence. Luckily, Kakashi had nimbly kept his distance from her, and she had been relieved for once that he had.

Nisei kept trying to see this invitation as a nice gesture from the living, breathing Kazekage, but she was starting to increasingly feel out of place, though everyone had seemed welcoming and very kind. It was odd to find herself surrounded by Suna shinobi for merely social reasons. Temari was watching the girl from dark eyes, as she had been for quite some time now, wanting to know just what kind of mystery the dark haired Anbu was, when Nisei was just trying to dodge any and all situations that required interaction with anyone.

"So, you're the one who came to Hitori's rescue?" The blonde's curiosity had finally won out, and forced her to ask the question that had been lingering on her tongue for the last few minutes.

With a quick nod, Nisei started to explain. "Well, at first... it was on different terms, but the outcome was just the same, I suppose. Hitori was just following her orders, to protect your brother." She stopped herself there, not wanting to give the impression that Konoha Anbu was as divided as, in fact, it was. "She's especially strong, don't you think?"

Kankurou laughed next to them, cutting off his older sister, as he joined in the conversation. "That's right, she is." His onyx eyes seemed to hold a hint of mischief when they momentarily settled on her again, before going back to scanning the crowds. "You know, there is something remarkably cute about Anbu women."

"Anbu women..." Nisei trailed, as she looked over towards Kouki, who was now engaged in conversation with the smaller Anbu, Yomi. She looked at the puppet user then, and nodded briefly. "Oh, yes. We do have our charm. We love to kill for our village. It's simply our life..."

"Hitori seems to be taking on a whole new life, though." Temari added lightly, and not with the sarcastic tone that Nisei was listening for, and expecting. The brother and sister of Gaara, were they really so cool about their little brother's choice? She couldn't think on the topic for too long, what with worrying about her current personal situation. She had no right to judge anyone else's choices with the mess she seemed to make of her own.

"That's good for her." The Anbu captain excused herself and brushed past them, Kankurou's response fading in the distance and unheard, as she moved to stand next to Kouki. It was the only place that she didn't feel unknown. Yomi smiled brightly at her, looking more like a kid, than the adult that he was.

"Nisei-chan!" The diminutive Anbu inched closer to her as Kouki took a step to the side to let her in. Blue eyes gazed down and watched the look of discomfort crossing her face.

"Yomi and I were just discussing that crazy bastard, Danzou. Unfortunately, he's not allowed to say too much or else he becomes paralyzed. Isn't that sick..." She leaned against him before he could finish what he was saying. Kouki's only response was to hold her, with her warm face pressed against shoulder, and he could practically feel how much she didn't want to be here. It was also apparent that she was now aggravated by something, as well.

"Excuse us for a moment." Kouki's calm voice was oddly pleasant as Nisei wrapped her arms around him, and Yomi nodded, drawing away from the pair. This felt really safe for some reason, one that she'd rather not admit to, though her body fell for it completely. She was being pulled through the gathered crowd of dancing couples, and she wanted to laugh at just how ridiculous she was being, going from bluntly serious, to this - buried beneath her own misery.

"What's wrong with you?" His finger lightly traced over the back of her neck, staring at her when their eyes met briefly, before her golden gaze darted away again. "Nisei, this isn't unlike you, this forward behavior..."

"I really don't know why you're complaining about it." He pulled her into a hug as she finished speaking, glaring around at the community surrounding them. She seemed like a lost child again and he felt responsible for picking up the shattered pieces. Each step he took led her further into the small stepped dance. She moved with him, against her better judgment that maybe she should try to get a hold of herself and simply stop at some point. This was either one, making her look vulnerable, or two, giving Kouki the wrong idea.

"Because it's not you." So what if it wasn't like her? Nisei closed her eyes, as she continued to sway from side to side. It was innocent of course, but she wondered if Kakashi would find it as innocent as it appeared. It wasn't like she was trying to create jealousy. She just had to start thinking about the possibilities. Without stopping to question why she was doing it, Nisei leaned up on her toes as she wrapped an arm around Kouki's neck.

"Kouki, you're my best friend." She couldn't stop the words from coming out, especially now as she studied him. Nisei and Kouki existed as a different story, and there were a lot of bruises and scratches along the way. They both knew he would always come running to save and defend her, to protect her at all costs. "I'm sorry that I can't be what you want, but I want you to know that I love you."

"Kouki senpai, I didn't know that you could dance..." It was Ibuki, who had Hitori held against him firmly by her waist. Nisei was relieved to find that the female had just as much experience in dancing as she did - absolutely none. The redhead was having a problem with keeping her balance and staying grounded, which explained why the Anbu had such a tight grip on her. Hitori's back bumped into someone else's who had been dancing gracefully and Ibuki smiled, apologizing even though he wasn't the one to be blamed for her clumsiness.

The captain didn't answer, and his intense stare continued to remain focused on the small girl in his arms. This was what he'd always wanted and yet, it wasn't fulfilled. Nisei would always love Kakashi. This dance they shared was only one sided and Kouki knew it. What was Nisei trying to achieve by holding him this way, and allowing herself to be held, for that matter? She couldn't be what he wanted, but she loved him? His mind wanted to tell her that it was enough, but that would be overstepping his boundaries. The Jonin was always close by, keeping watch over his lost treasure, which should have remained lost to him.

Just as the irritating thought occurred, he felt the loss of Nisei's body. She was slowly moving away from him with her eyes fixed on something else, something away from him and the crowd of people. Annoyed with himself, he let her go, not even slightly interested in what was so distracting to her. It could be anything with the seemingly lost and confused frame of mind she was in now. That moment had been the real thing, and the closest that he would ever come to being with Nisei. The defeat alone was hard enough to bear, but realization quickly followed it. He'd had her in his arms and he released her. What would possess him to do such a thing?

Nisei's eyes squinted as she looked through the obscuring mass of humanity in front of her. There were a lot of people walking around still cloaked from the earlier blinding sun, but there was someone out of place. The attire was completely black, colors one should not wear while traveling in the desert, and even though most of the Anbu were wearing that same color tonight, she couldn't help the feeling that she was getting in her gut. As a strong wind blew past, she saw the long choppy strands of mixed raven and blond hair fluttering out the side of the hood of the long cape.

She wondered if it was possible that Ruka would come to Suna's festival. Was he really that spiteful? Her heart tightened as she continued to carefully follow the cloaked figure. She couldn't deny the feeling she had, especially after being electrocuted to nearly her last breath. Nisei's mind replaced herself with Hitori, and her fists clenched tightly, her fingernails leaving livid, crescent shaped dents in the tender flesh of each hand. Each step pulled her increasingly closer to what she saw as her bringing justice. During a festival, she wondered if she was truly capable of starting something like this, especially if Ruka remained quiet.

"Whatever is going through your head, you should probably let it go." The familiar, steady voice came from behind her. Nisei turned to see Kakashi standing there with his arms crossed lazily and the usual book in his gloved hand, though he continued to scrutinize her, his one visible eye moving shamelessly over her. "Even if that was Ruka, what makes you think that you could defeat him all by yourself?"

"A lot of things…like learning from mistakes." She was furious now. It wasn't like her last meeting with the Jonin went smoothly, what with being shoved against a wall and taken advantage of, as if those were normal aspects of their encounters. The look he was giving her now let her know that no matter what response she gave him, justified or not, it would be entirely wrong. A new question dawned in her mind, and once the thought was there, she had no choice but to voice it. "What are you prepared to do in order to stop me, Kakashi senpai… ?"

His eyes flashed as the word 'senpai' spilled off of her tongue in such a daunting, challenging way . Would he allow her to push him away with just a simple suffix? Kakashi remembered all too clearly the fear in her eyes when he'd settled the power of the Sharingan on her, without using it. There were plenty of ways to stop Nisei from doing something that he wouldn't see fit to use, and even more that he'd probably never even contemplate. It was impossible to make up the girl's mind about something, or anything for that matter. She was determined to do the opposite of whatever he suggested, and that much was obvious.

"Nisei, don't be difficult." She started to walk towards him, her eyes narrowing into slits, and her actions caused a chilly feeling to grow between them. She didn't stop walking once she reached him, but continued past without another word. Kakashi had won this time, and she hoped the victory felt as hollow as she did right now. Though, if Nisei truly saw Ruka again, she was sure that she would do everything in her power to derail the bastard by first severing off his arms. Thunder would never touch the ground again, and that would be enough to put her at ease. She'd settle for hurting him in any way possible. A tired sort of laughter floated through her mind. No, she hadn't lingered on vengeful thoughts.

Kouki watched with heavy, lidded eyes as Nisei passed by the Jonin. Bitterness made his mouth tingle, not just from the alcohol, but now an odd sense satisfaction. In a few days, the young Anbu in Nisei's charge would graduate and officially become part of either Konoha's infantry or Root. Nisei would have to choose a path, and he was sure that she was coming to see it as that, now. The likeliness of Tsunade handing Nisei yet another group of young trainees seemed dim – at least at the moment. The favored Anbu would sooner find herself with a hefty office desk, if the Hokage had her way. Even Kouki knew Nisei's fate better than she seemed to.

It was only two drinks, and Kouki swished the liquid between his teeth, then from cheek to cheek. The worthy Anbu captain, the elite... He laughed at the many compliments he'd received in his days, hearing a new sound to them now, one that rang of false sincerity. He was nothing of that sort, truly. He'd chased after the same woman for years, never once admitting to the real possibility of defeat, but carrying on as if he enjoyed abusing himself. Nothing had stopped his feelings from growing, and growing deeper, not even his own rationality. Right now, he felt like he'd lost everything, as if Nisei was everything, and to him, perhaps she was, with her stubborn golden eyes, full curvy lips, and long gorgeous hair that he'd never seen out of its ponytail. He would be a liar if he said he'd never imagined what it would feel like unbound and sliding over his skin, or twisted between his fingers.

Only two drinks and then another, because he was elite after all, and surrounded by respectful persons such as the Kazekage, though Gaara seemed to have disappear once the fireworks were about to begin. Kouki peered over the crowd, but Nisei had vanished from his line of vision. It's not like he would presume to stand next to her and watch the bursts of light against the backdrop of the night sky, anyway. Kouki would patiently keep his distance, until she needed him again - like a pathetic dog. Turning his piercing blue eyes back to the sky, he wondered how he found himself so oddly contented.

"Yomi… ?" Nisei squinted, certain she had found the small Anbu who was looking away dejectedly from the group he was currently standing with. A smile took up residence on his face, though it was apparent that he was miserable. He also couldn't hide the fact that he was definitely drunk. His face seemed to light up once he saw her, and he abruptly ended his half-hearted attempt at conversation to walk over and join her.

"Nisei chan, what are you doing standing here alone?" She looked down at the drink in his hand. He would still drink, even when his slur was obvious, and that didn't surprise her even a little. Slowly, she took the cup from his hand and beamed back a patient smile. It wasn't like dealing with Yomi was 'dealing' with Yomi. She wouldn't mind his company at all.

Yomi was an extremely playful type, so she prepared herself for his quirky qualities. "The same as you, I guess."

"That has to be a lie. You have both Kakashi-san and Kouki-san on your tail. There's someone you could be standing next to while the fireworks go off." It was true. Nisei could take her spot next to Kakashi, but she found herself too overwhelmingly angry with him to really even consider the thought. Then, there was Kouki, but she was sending off the wrong signals around him, and it was unfair of her to keep doing so. She didn't feel right standing next to either of them, even if her heart tensed at the thought of not sharing this experience with the Copy ninja.

She smiled back at him, deciding to try her best to brighten up his mood. "The same goes for you, too. Hitori is your closest friend, right?"

He shook his head at the girl, his honey colored eyes betraying him. He had feelings, ones that he would do his best to contain. "I don't think that I have the right to stand next to her during such moments. Ne, Nisei-chan, some battles we must lose, or something along those lines. I do think that I'll go find her and wish that she…"

Nisei nodded, despite her immediate need to draw him back. Whatever Yomi planned on doing, for some reason, it didn't sit well with her. She had a feeling that he would end up becoming even more upset by what he found. Gaara and Hitori were gone anyway, so following after the couple didn't seem to hold any logic. Nisei's hand stopped reaching for him, and she let him slip by her, undeterred. She watched him go with a certain feeling of loss, and sincerely hoped that his wish was more like 'goodbye' to his feelings.

'I wish you happiness… More than I wish happiness for anyone, even myself.' The wish hung like a fog over the Root's head, as Yomi raised his newly acquired drink up to his lips and swallowed quickly. Finding Ibuki would be in his best interests, considering that the young Anbu was more likely than anyone else to know where Hitori went. His eyes scanned around for his unmistakable friend, and once he found him, Yomi stumbled off in that direction, muttering under his breath, in a slightly comical, drunken fashion.

"Okay…" Nisei whispered lowly to herself as she walked towards the boxy, tanned buildings, and started searching all over again. That cloaked figure, it was more than just coincidence, and the feeling tugged at her until she realized she'd go crazy if she didn't do something about it. If Ruka truly had the intention of harming others on such an occasion, then she would be sure she was ready to meet him halfway. Even if Kakashi's words were still loud amidst the muddled mess in her head, she couldn't allow herself to continue to blindly listen to his reason.

Kakashi was levelheaded, she'd give him that, but the Jonin didn't know how to follow his heart. It would probably never be like him to act on impulse. He simply stood by, with a book in hand, merely raising his slender brow in question. That wasn't enough this time. Why did no one else seem to care that perhaps the enemy was this cunning? Maybe the truth was that she just needed to get away from everyone. This entire time, she could feel eyes on her, going over every move she'd made throughout the whole night. Dancing with Kouki may or may have not been a mistake, and Kakashi…

She jumped, hearing and feeling the first dull shock of the fireworks being set off. It burst into the sky, the colors pale blue and silvery white expanding across the dark blanket of the night. The hanabi would be an unavoidable distraction to hearing or thinking, let alone tracking down some nut who was working for Danzou in the most evil of ways. That old man was scheming something awful, and it was irritating that everyone knew, but no one could put a stop to it. Just then, one shadow quickly separated from its almost comfortingly grouped fellows on the ground and darted away. She picked up on it the second it moved, and took off down the deserted street in pursuit.

A tiny gray kitten crossed her path, and stopped to stare at her accusingly, as if she had interrupted it's important business. Next to the cat, a festival kite bumped across the sand covered ground, tugged by the fitful fingers of the wind that managed to slip between the buildings. It was a possibility that the shadow was just this forgotten object… Now she felt stupid, as she took another sip from Yomi's stolen cup that still rested in her hand, wincing the moment the alcohol met her lips. The bitter taste burned on the way down, igniting a small tongue of warmth that flashed through her body, and she mentally cursed Yomi for his choice. She lifted the kite from the ground and narrowed her golden eyes at the cat in a glare, as it swished it's tail and began to saunter off nonchalantly in a different direction.

The opposite direction being important…

Of course, no one was there. She couldn't peg her suspicions on an overactive imagination, though. With a sigh, Nisei decided to let it go, and the girl made her way quickly back towards the crowds of the festival. Fireworks were going off loudly in synchronized groups, now. Everyone remained close to their friends and family, and watched with smiles and wide eyes in celebration of the two lovers in the stars, who brought them all together this night. She hadn't yet stopped to regard the sky as it was being greatly disturbed by the tiny explosions, and couldn't bring herself to do so at this moment, either. Perhaps she was the disturbed one, frantic amidst the contented.

All contented, except for one, that is. Nisei raised a hand to her hip skeptically when she saw Yomi walking towards her, again. This time his approach was different, and he carried two drinks. When she had finished his last cup, she'd thrown it away, and now she found herself almost eagerly grabbing the nameless poison from extended hand and drinking it without thought. It went down easily this time, as opposed to the last. His face was pale, and his eyes seeming to hold emptiness, if that was even possible for such a person, who was always so happy.

Nisei decided not to question him on the topic, but rather, to avoid it with skill. She turned towards the tables and handed Yomi yet another glass, which he took before she could even really offer it. Their eyes met, and his weren't even slightly apologetic. This was very much not his normal way, and perhaps he should feel guilty, but he couldn't bring himself to care. The silence that burdened him was his own fault, and the reality that had consumed him felt even worse than this guilt, or anything else he'd ever experienced. It felt like he had been struck in the face repeatedly by the endless opportunities that he'd let slip past him. Perhaps he'd never expected to see such an abrupt end to those possibilities.

If anyone was responsible for Hitori, it was Yomi. He lifted a hand to his head and let the light pressure from his fingers remain there. Nisei's presence, he discovered, was a much needed one at the moment. He couldn't physically reach for drinks anymore and the Anbu captain was more than willing to hand them over without questioning, or trying to stop him. He didn't fail to notice that she was in much the same condition, as she winced with each sip she took, and each cup she went for. She would damn them both, and neither of the two truly cared about the outcome thanks to the alcohol induced numbness that was slowly and pleasantly blurring their minds.

"You're great company, Nisei-chan," Yomi muttered breathlessly, as a small pained laugh escaped him. "I always knew, ever since the day you whooped me all around Konoha and back. You have potential, kid. Root potential." Even his own eyes seemed slightly confused by, but absolutely certain of, what he'd just said, almost as if there was something he should be remembering.

She shook her head through a clouded haze, her glassy eyes desperate to focus as she tried to sober up enough to get her very important statement across. "You work for a really, really, really bad man, Yomi…Yo-m-ster…Yonster…"

"That's not the worst of it…" He leaned in, and pressed a finger to his lips, matching her seriousness with the closest approximation of the same feeling that he could muster. "Don't tell anyone, but he's a really bad man."

"News, Yomi! News…" Nisei swatted her hand in his face, unable to stop the stream of giggles that left her mouth. "I already knew that. Who doesn't know that… ? Everyone knows that, Yoni…Yomi."

"Not Hitori. She thinks he's like her father, but I..." He drew himself up and puffed his chest out a little. "I am her fucking father." Yomi took a seat on the edge of the table, lifting the other half high into the air, as cups cascaded down around him. He jumped a little as he quickly got up. "Oh, excuse me, sir."

"You're too young for that, Yomi. Besides, Gaara is her new…mastery guy… thing... " Her hand fluttered around, as if that would call up the words she was searching for, and before Nisei could continue her rant, she watched in surprise as the Root became suddenly animated.

"Not her actually actual father, but I am the guy who taught her how to love. It makes sense that she'd be with me right? I taught her facial expressions and expressions in general. I should take credit for who she is!" He dropped his cup to run his fingers tough his hair, tugging at the ends in frustration. "Why the hell does it have to be a guy that I can't compete with? Sure, I'm tall… But I'm older."

Nisei stood up to her full height and stood beside him, now. Yomi looked like he was about to quake as she placed a hand on his shoulder, after several failed attempts. "Okay, Yomi. All I'm hearing is 'me me me'…" She paused for a moment, her eyebrows knitting with confusion as she thought hard for a moment. "Did you just say that you're tall?"

A loud firework went off that left Nisei clutching onto Yomi's arm. They laughed hard, while swaying back and forth against each other. She'd never thought that she would see the day when she would be standing next to another Anbu, drunk. Nisei was a lightweight to start with, but her entire body felt weightless now, and it was a surprisingly pleasant sensation. He kept his arm around her shoulders as they fought for who would be the main form of support. The Anbu captain took a step back while Yomi stumbled forward. Those actions would have resulted in a painful fall for both of them, but Nisei felt a strong hand close around her arm, gripping tightly.

"Ouch…" She giggled, despite the pain radiating through her suddenly weak joints. Kakashi's face turned serious as he slowly realized that she was under the influence of what seemed to be a rather large amount of alcohol. She smiled cheekily, raising her chin to try to see the Jonin more clearly. It wasn't working, and she only laughed harder now. "Kakashi senpai…I am so happy to see you…You saved me back there."

He kept his voice level, even though his veins were housing fire at this point, and he was beyond furious with the girl. "Nisei, you're drunk."

"That was the plan that I had been thinking…" Yomi trailed off, as he too squinted up at the older man, grinning now from ear to ear before falling over and giggling softly. "You have white hair."

Before Nisei could respond, or add to what her partner in crime was saying, she felt the grip that Kakashi had on her arm grow tighter, and he began dragging her away. Her feet planted into the ground as he pulled hard on her wrist, and his fingers slipped a little down her skin. The hold he had on her was firm, but her stubborn behavior was going to give him problems. His thoughts were rushing, and Kakashi felt himself unable to catch up, even as he was forced to stop around every corner. Nisei was barely keeping up with him, and actually still struggling to free herself from his grasp.

"You're being a serious jerk!" She yelled loudly into the empty street, trying to prevent him from pulling her even further away from the festival. Nisei finally just dropped completely, letting her legs give out in the hope that, finding her such a burden, he would simply let her go. "The fireworks are going off, and I was having fun… and Yomi needs me! He's all upset, and now you're just…What are you doing?!"

Kakashi took her by the waist and effortlessly placed her over his shoulder, finding that it was much easier than trying to drag her around behind him. He let his lazy expression linger, doing his best not to growl when he felt her tiny fists start pounding against his back. Annoyed, he continued his way through the hotel lobby and up the stairs to his room. His key slid in with ease, and Nisei's angry screams died down into sighs of frustration, since fighting him was proving impossible in her intoxicated state.

Once the door was closed, he set her down on the floor and started to make his way further inside the room. His arm shot out, and he successfully caught the offending pillow she swung at him in his hand. Within the blink of an eye, he had the girl pinned to the door behind her, and dropping the second pillow that she had been aiming for his head. Kakashi wasn't in the mood for playing games, and that was all their relationship seemed to be, anymore. He'd decided he was going to put an end to it, right now.

"You're mine." She raised an eyebrow, not at the statement, but at the tone of his voice. It was low, dark, and almost threatening. She hadn't realized until now that Kakashi could be possessive. Attempting to counter it with her own words would have been useless, since only seconds later his mouth took hers, effectively shutting her up. It was the insinuation of the claim he made to her. As her arms were freed, she slowly wrapped them around his neck and allowed him to slam her against the opposite wall.

Of course she was his, it had always been that way. He had already marked her. She felt his hand come up to the side of her face, feeling over the scar. In a way, he felt satisfied by it, even if he had been harboring guilt for injuring the girl on the most profound mission of his life. She tried to turn away, but he grasped the side of her face and held her still. Kissing her had become a sudden fixation, and his tongue parted her lips slowly, tasting her. It was absurd how much want had taken over, as his fingers trailed down the collar of the silky fabric she was wearing, and easily pulled the kimono open.

Just as her weakening legs started to slip, he caught hold of her thighs, keeping her pinned against the hard surface before he moved to his mask and pulled it down to his neck. The material was getting in the way when he needed more than anything just to feel her. He tore the glove off of his right hand and resumed caressing over her pale skin, satisfied without the fabric between their skin. The kimono wasn't much of a barrier, hanging open off of her shoulders. With only one free hand, he was still successful at quickly removing the silky fabric attempting to bar his way, as well as the fragile undergarments that never stood a chance.

"It's the only way to show you…" She felt pressure, warmth between her thighs. His pants were loose, hanging below his hips, as he pressed himself against her, and his mouth brushed against her ear, his breath washing over her sensitive skin. "It's the only way that you'll realize it, too. You're mine in every possible way." He slammed his hips up, and felt her stiffen as pain wracked throughout her body, causing shock to run through his. He hadn't known she was a virgin, even if he had, he doubted that he could have made it pleasant for the girl with his emotions on edge.

She kept her legs closed tightly over his hips as he started to move in and out, slowly this time. His mouth trailed fire from just below her ear down along her neck, sucking in the skin enough to leave light bruises. The small sighs and gasps escaping her only fueled his need. Who they were made it impossible to leave the marks she rightfully deserved, the ones that he wanted almost desperately to make in several places on her pale flesh. He brushed his lips towards the less exposed inches of skin beneath her collarbone, and even lower as he roughly took her small wrists into one hand.

She tensed again, feeling his teeth moving down along the space between her breasts. With each kiss, each bite, he savored every inflicted moment of pleasure and pain. His mouth closed down just as he thrust upwards again, causing the girl to cry out louder than before. The flush on her skin was proof enough that she'd been insecure from the start, and was now simply dying from having both of his eyes on her this way. Kakashi's heavy gaze saw right through her at the most revealing point of her life. She felt like she was unable to gain any control of the situation, as it further warmed, yet continued to embarrass her.

All of those books... Her mind reeled at the thought of the books that he'd been reading, and she was nothing like those girls. Nisei suppressed a moan, pressing her face into his shoulder as he moved them away from the wall. The cool sheets on her feverish skin felt like relief. He hurriedly removed his vest, and beneath it, the long sleeved shirt. He was impossibly paler than even her, and delicately built, with an attractive slender frame that not even his Jonin uniform could hide. When he returned to her, his silver hair hung in his face, and his mask and headband lay discarded beside them.

"Nisei…Daisuki…" It was a breathless declaration from him, but it was enough to make her heart tighten. She was the first one to start moving this time, her hips meeting his in earnest. She only wanted him more now, especially since it was finally clear to her that he loved her. Kakashi was careful, gently resting his hands next to her head on the mattress. She could feel his shoulders flexing beneath her fingers as her nails skimmed across his back. It made perfect sense to hold on as tightly as she could.

The pain she'd felt before had suddenly been replaced by something else, and she was nearly ashamed to be enjoying it. When his mouth closed over hers, she felt him breathe in against her, stealing the air and leaving her gasping . He ground his hips against her, going as deeply as he could go, before pulling out slowly, and then slamming back in. He repeated this several times, until their kiss broke from the noises she couldn't stop herself from releasing. It felt undeniably good there. Kakashi was only encouraged by her moans and breathy sounds, and his pace gradually picked up, until she was repeatedly arching from pleasure, and lost in the throes of it.

In fact, Kakashi wondered when, or if, he would be able stop tonight.

--

After the dawn had lit up the horizon, Nisei's eyes began to slowly open. The sun in Suna was practically blazing already, and she crawled from the bed, reaching down to collect her clothes from the floor. She threw them towards the corner upon realizing that they were ruined, and went to her bag to pull out her Anbu uniform, dressing in a quiet rush. The man sleeping on the bed was oblivious to her soft footsteps, and she tore her gaze away from what she was leaving as she stepped out of the room.

There were a lot of things that she couldn't understand, like why she had to leave, and why it felt wrong to stay. She felt like actually being with Kakashi only pushed them miles away from each other, somehow. Nisei found she already missed him as the sand wisped beneath her feet, her steps carrying her along the path out of Suna. The sudden presence of another person caused her to slow to a stop. It wasn't Kakashi, there was no way. She lifted her head up towards the sky and took in a deep breath of air.

"Yomi...?" She asked as she turned to confront him. He stood there with his mask in his hand, twirling it on the tip of his finger. "What are you doing up this early? I figured you'd have a hangover to sleep off."

"I wonder what the point of keeping this mask is… ?" His dark eyes looked at her for a moment, before he crossed the short distance to stand directly in front of her. "I need you to return it to Konoha, but not to Danzou. I need this to go to the Hokage. I fully understand the difference between Root and Konoha Anbu, finally. Even if he didn't break my spirit, I've done some pretty messed up things at his command. I want to forgive myself, and this is part of my way."

"Have you told Ibuki this?" Nisei teased, as she took the porcelain mask from him and held it gently in her hands. A monkey definitely looked like the mask Yomi would wear.

"Have you told Kakashi that you were heading back to Konoha?" As the words came from him, Nisei couldn't stop herself from laughing a little. She felt awful about it, but the former Root was far too clever, and obviously paid very close attention. The response was only warranted.

"Touché…It's been nice seeing you. I'll visit whenever it's possible." Nisei froze when she felt his arms wrap around her, and a long moment passed before her arms moved to hug him in return. "Yomi, it won't be too long. I promise."

With a small nod, he drew slowly away from her. "I know, and I don't know at the same time. It's complicated, but in case I do something stupid before then, I wanted to say goodbye."

"Stupid?" She asked, as she raised an eyebrow at him. "You mean recklessly jumping in to save someone?"

He gave another sad, pathetic nod. "I guess that's it…"

"That's the kind of stupid recklessness that's okay, Yomi." She patted his head, before turning to walk through the gates. "I'll see you soon!"

"If you're not being spanked," He muttered to himself, thinking of what the Copy ninja would do once he woke up in an empty bed, to an empty room. "I'd fucking kill her."

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End of chapter. Thanks for reading!


	23. 勇気 Courage

Author's Note: Chapter Twenty One. It really doesn't seem like it's been long enough to get this far, lol. Again we thank you so much for all the hits and reviews. Hope you're enjoying the story!

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Moon's Light, Reality's Dream  
月の光、うつつの夢  
Chapter Twenty One - 勇気 (_Courage)_

手を伸ばせば君がいた_  
When I stretched my hand out, you were there._  
まだ心に君がいた_  
In my heart, you were still there._

"You really should have been there," Nisei started, as she took a seat from across the Hokage. Tsunade, at this point, was just ecstatic to see the young Anbu in a good mood for once. "We arrived there sometime in the early afternoon, and we were shown to a hotel, which was okay. I mean, they were actually really very nice people, and I did get to learn more about Suna while I was there."

_'Why do I have to wear this thing?' Kouki tugged on the tan colored material, and tried to figure out where to put his head through the shirt. 'This is ridiculous. Nisei, where the hell are you? I need help with this…' _

_Nisei stood beside him and looked over the clothing, unable to find the specific area where his spiky head could fit through, tugging on what she thought was the hood. 'Kouki, I really…Well, maybe…Wait, no…Here, here we go…Put your head through here…'_

_'That's the sleeve, little miss.' A soft fit of laughter followed the statement from the old man standing next to the cart. At least he knew how the shirts went on. The man joined in attempting to help the Captain a moment later, as soon as Kouki had very ungraciously fallen to ground, bested by the unfamiliar clothing. 'Hold still, young man. I'll help you. No, don't use your foot…' _

"Kakashi, during that time, had successfully set up a wide perimeter, even though it probably wasn't necessary," Nisei remembered, as she looked at Tsunade, whose expression hadn't changed since the moment Nisei started to tell the story. "Well, you know Kakashi, he'd rather be safe than sorry. It's just how he's always been."

The blond let out a 'Hmph' sound, her eyes wandering over towards Shizune, who looked all too enthusiastic as she beamed back a smile, before mumbling out a response. "I suppose that Kakashi-san is a very peculiar man. Especially with that one summoning jutsu. What was it again… ?"

_Kakashi bit into his thumb, smearing his blood across the scroll, 'Kuchiyose Doton, Tsuiga no Jutsu!' The smoke dissipated quickly, revealing his eight ninken. They looked back at him with personality, and he smiled almost affectionately at the sight of them. Pakkun leaped from the top of Buru's head and calmly awaited orders from his master._

_'Ano, Kakashi-san, it hasn't been that long, has it?' The pug laughed, at least as much as a dog could get away with. 'You didn't use an ordinary summoning jutsu, so I take it that you don't want us to be hanging around. Who is it that you want tracked?' _

_'Ruka from the Foundation, the same man who attacked Nisei. He might find tonight a perfect opportunity to strike again, except this time his target is Hitori. Do your best to track him, and if you don't find him after searching through the Sand, then I'll assume he's not in Suna.' Kakashi didn't want to take the risk of something happening tonight, especially with so many civilians present. Kazekage-sama had his plans, but then again, so did Kakashi, and he hoped that the young Kage wouldn't take this as a slight. _

_'Easy enough,' Pakkun said, as the other dogs separated out into their own teams and formations before darting off in haste. The festival was only a few short hours away, and Kakashi was uncomfortable with how those hours were starting to close in on him, now. He needed these moments to think clearly. Sure, he wanted to enjoy himself, but there was something that continued to bother him, a tension that wouldn't go away._

_'Are you going to get something to wear tonight?' He froze, hearing Nisei's voice. She was standing nearby with her hands resting behind her back. How long had she been standing there for? Kakashi pushed the thought from his mind as she started to walk towards him, irritatingly followed by the seemingly ever-present blonde Anbu Captain._

_The intended eye-crease failed to turn out right when he found himself glaring at Kouki instead, almost entirely ignoring the young man beside them. Kakashi was satisfied when he heard himself answering in a sickeningly friendly voice, 'Of course! Kouki, Ibuki…Shall we?' _

"You know, Kakashi isn't really a bad guy. I mean, he can think for you, himself, and an entire army. I guess he's always been that way," Tsunade smiled, admiring the Jonin's self-imposed authority, before she leaned in towards Nisei. "Tell me what it that you wore that night. It must've been foreign to you, wearing something like a kimono. Sometimes, even I have a hard time just thinking back on it."

Nisei tilted her head, trying to get the picture correct in her mind when so much had happened. "It was checkered purple and white. Minase and Hikaru, from Kouki's team, helped me choose it. They needed their own festival outfits to wear." She laughed softly before continuing on. "I won't deny it, the silk was very hard to adjust to, and it was very tight around the waist. The men were too busy not caring about having something to wear. In fact, they remained in uniform."

Tsunade's eyes widened, "They didn't! How disrespectful…"

"That was my reaction, as well. Something must've stopped them. I mean, what are the chances of both of them not finding something to wear? Anyway, my reaction…" Nisei nodded, remembering fully her reaction to what Kouki and Kakashi had been wearing as they stood awkwardly next to each other. If you had been there, you wouldn't have been able to tell, but there was an underlying tension, one that was created from the deeply laced hatred and jealousy between them.

_Nisei stood in front of the long mirror and let herself release a loud sigh. She didn't feel overly girly, but more ridiculous than anything. She hadn't bothered to follow Minase and Hikaru to the woman who was doing makeup for only a couple of ryo. It would be a joke if she had that gook on her face. It felt more natural going as her usual self, even if it wasn't anything spectacular. She'd barely even paid attention to her long, dark hair, only twisting it into a simple bun._

_There weren't any masks to hide behind. When she finally willed herself into taking the first step outside of the room, she opened the door to see both girls standing there, dressed beautifully in colorful silk, with their faces made up to perfection, and their hair framing their faces exquisitely. This would be one of the only nights, with their profession, that they would ever get to dress this way. Nisei flashed a nervous smile as they started to head towards the spot where both teams were going to be meeting._

_'Ibuki looks so handsome,' Minase whispered over to Hikaru who was already nodding in response. _

_'When doesn't he look handsome? The elite boy spawned by perfection... I don't think he can help it." The pink haired girl nearly giggled as the two leaned their heads even closer together. "As much as I appreciate gawking at his Anbu uniform, I must admit, he looks especially good in formal wear.'_

_Both girls came to a sudden halt, and Nisei's head shot up to see what stopped them. There, in front of the building opposite of the hotel stood three elite ninja, two of whom were still in uniform. It took thought, patience, and practically three hours to choose a dress and find some sandals, then have hair and makeup done. Kouki and Kakashi had achieved nothing within that time, except maybe looking a little less dusty than when they'd arrived. Nisei's hand left her side as she stormed her way over to them. _

_Nisei decided not to care about the awkward feelings that were practically forming a visible line between Kakashi and Kouki. With an arm reeled back to slap the closest person in the face, she felt a hand abruptly stopping her. It made little sense for Ibuki to be the one to do it, but he did. She looked back at the boy's calm face, and made note of how impossible he could be sometimes. Kouki's protege was even more infuriating in that he had dared to stop a Captain._

_'Now, now Nisei sensei, you wouldn't want to embarrass yourself by making a scene.' His voice was even, precise, and completely unruffled by the possible consequences of his actions. She couldn't believe that the brat had gotten between her and Kouki's face. She yanked her wrist back, and stared openly as the young Anbu sauntered off in the direction of the festival with one of his teammates hanging on each arm, leaving the other two men to stand there amused. _

_'You know, I really did raise him to be a lot like myself,' Kouki sighed, while he shook his head, mimicking the action of a proud father. 'Can you feel it, the nostalgia?' _

_Nisei took that moment to get in the slap she needed, causing Kouki to rub at his now stinging red cheek. She turned her heated gaze to Kakashi, who was smiling under his mask at her. It was his only way of getting out of being slapped into a ball of misery, like Kouki currently was, and the Anbu pathetically stalked off muttering about 'how could you' and 'it was all a misunderstanding'. There had to be a reason why these two hadn't bothered to dress properly, and she wanted to know what it was._

_'So, what happened?' Nisei asked, as she and Kakashi started to slowly walk towards the entrance of the festival. 'You're standing here in a Jonin uniform and Kouki showed up as Anbu. That's not exactly what I thought this was about.' She glared in ahead of them at the others and let out a soft sigh. 'Even Ibuki managed to dress up. I saw this festival as something more like a vacation, or hell, even an honor to be invited to.'_

_'We decided to be on our guard tonight. It could get rather dangerous.' That was it? The boys decided that they would rather be in uniform, just in case something interesting happened. She rolled her eyes at the typical shinobi male, and walked ahead of the Jonin to gather her thoughts. It would be a waste of time trying to understand him. There had to have been another reason, a different one that put a complete end to finding formal wear. _

"That's all of the men in this village, Nisei," Tsunade tried to make it sound reasonable as she folded her hands together. "They'll look for any old reason as to why they don't have to step out of uniform. It's starting to become more like a security blanket, in all honesty. I think it's sad how the men of Konoha are becoming little boys."

"Ibuki-kun," Shizune closed her eyes for a moment, and a visible blush appeared on her cheeks. Tsunade and Nisei shared a small laugh, hearing the breathless words escaping the aide. "I wish I could have been there to watch the fireworks with him. It's such a special moment, to be shared with the people you care about most, and especially the one that you're in love with…"

"Shizune… you and Ibuki?" Tsunade asked, as a blond brow arched in question. It was an amusing thought considering how young the Anbu was compared to Shizune.

"IIE!" Though of course, that frantic rushed 'NO' seemed more like a definite 'YES'. Shizune cleared her throat self consciously as she looked at Nisei again. "So, how was the rest of the evening?"

"Well, there was a lot of dancing. Hitori and Ibuki danced a few times, and so did Kouki and I." She looked down at her hands, trying to see in her mind what exactly had happened. It was her fault for hurting Kouki's feelings. She should have been standing with him, but she'd ended up ignoring him for most of the night. The confession that they were just friends had somehow seemed to ruin their moods, and she couldn't think too long on the reasons behind that. It was because they both knew she could have been with him. "Then, I met up with Yomi and we had some laughs."

That wasn't the entire truth, far from it, actually. She did go chasing after a shadow, thinking that it was Ruka. When she looked into Tsunade's eyes, she just didn't have the heart to say so. It was impossible to tell the Hokage that she would have willingly rushed off into danger again. "The fireworks started to go off, and Yomi and I had a few drinks. Then Kakashi found me, and the three of us watched them together. Which reminds me…"

_'I need you to return this to Konoha.' _

Nisei retrieved the Anbu mask from her bag and placed it carefully down on Tsunade's desk. She looked at it for a long moment before meeting Nisei's eyes, and the girl tried to continue calmly. "Yomi wanted me to tell you that he fully understands the difference between Root and Konoha Anbu, and that he wants to be forgiven. Lady Hokage, he really wanted you to have his mask."

"Then I will gladly have it." Tsunade's voice faded into a soft whisper as she lifted the porcelain into her hands and ran her thumbs beneath the eyes. It felt more like a trophy. One of Danzou's best had realized his wrongdoing, and now he wanted to be forgiven. Tsunade would surely grant it in a very long letter. "Thank you, Nisei." Her head snapped up and a change came over her softened features, immediately transforming her back into the usual, all business Tsunade. "I will assume that you have your speech for the Anbu graduation ceremony finished and prepared for tomorrow?"

"Yes ma'am…" Nisei nodded, as she rose from her seat, walking towards the door once she was dismissed. If she had told Tsunade the truth about her night of fireworks, then it would have been a disappointment. How could she ever tell her Hokage that it was almost the worst night of her life? She was able to breathe once she had stepped out into the unusually chilly air, and started in the direction of her small apartment.

No matter how many times she tried to distract her mind from it, she could still hear the sounds from that night in her head. The sounds, the sensations, the way it felt with his mouth everywhere, everything down to what it felt like moving as one, all seemed burned into her thoughts. Sure, that was what she'd wanted, it was what she needed from him, and also obviously something that he'd felt he had to prove to her. But the tension she'd felt that morning left her insides crushing like she was going to break apart. What was it that was scaring her away from him?

Love... ?

At what point had love become so frightening? Reaching the point of finally been able to obtain it was probably what set off her fear. Nisei felt the need to run away whenever the Jonin was around, like all of her emotions were going out of control. There were so many complications in the way, and the more she thought about him, the more she realized that she missed him horribly, the more she remembered the mistake she'd made. She had no right to abandon him, but the stubborn and selfish part of her hadn't been able to find any reason not to leave him.

Why couldn't she just admit it, that she loved him, too? Nisei stopped, seeing Kakashi standing outside of her apartment, and her eyes went as wide as saucers. He was deeply engrossed in that damned orange book, but that didn't make her feel any less vulnerable. After what had happened between them, she found it hard to stop the blush that rose in her cheeks. One foot in front of the other, she slowly crossed the short distance, and he finally looked over at her.

"Good afternoon, Nisei." He'd dropped the suffix. The lack of it did something to her, something that shouldn't happen, and her stomach flipped and flopped, to the point that her heart just about burst out of her chest. She shook her head to rid herself of the thought as she waved at him, and headed for her door. His silky voice was close enough to penetrate her senses, and her ear tickled slightly from the assault. "Mind telling me what happened? I woke up, and you were gone."

Nisei found herself shrugging, and damned herself for the false carelessness she felt compelled to show him. "I wanted to come back to Konoha to work on the speech for tomorrow. Why? What's the matter?"

"Nothing," Kakashi breathed as he closed her in. She felt his chest press against her back, keeping her pinned against the door. Nisei's eyes closed tightly, feeling his fingers in her hair before he tilted her head to the side. His mouth was already moist and warm – pressing kisses along the side of her neck. A deep chuckle sounded against her ear. "Is that difficult to wake me and tell me that you're leaving, or did you just want to be chased after?"

"It wasn't that at all-" She didn't get the chance to finish before she was turned sharply to face him. Nisei kept her back against the door, in an attempt at separating them. He searched her eyes, knowing that the truth wouldn't just come out of her without a little encouragement. She looked scared, but not of him, of something else. He already knew what it was, that it was typical Nisei, and he also knew that he would have trouble with her again, not that he minded too much at the moment. "It's just that... I needed to be away, in order to think. I'm sorry."

"Or…" Kakashi trailed off, disregarding her words to stay on the topic he preferred. If he didn't ask her now, he felt like he might never be able to, since he had never in his life chased a woman. This woman was worth chasing after. Onyx suddenly pierced into her golden eyes, as he held her there. The next stream of words came out in a gentle murmur, "…is it that difficult to say that you love me?"

"Kakashi, I…" He pulled her up onto her toes, and kissed her hard. His short nails dug into her arms as he held her there firmly. When he was certain that she was in need of air, he released her, settling her back onto her feet as she watched him curiously. The answer was what he wanted, and yet, he had stopped her.

"I want you to think about this, Nisei. Think about it, and get back to me. I'm a very patient man, when I want to be." And with that, Kakashi was gone, leaving her in another cloud of infuriating, swirling smoke. He comes in, sweeps her away and then dumps her on her doorstep again. At least, that's what it felt like. Now she had two concerns: Kakashi's answer, and the ceremony speech. Just when the day had started to look bright, it was slowly starting to grow dim again. Either way, Nisei would be sure to find a way to get through tomorrow.

--------

_Why do you still breathe?_

Yomi's eyes opened slowly as the strange question, in his own mocking voice, echoed through his head. With an agonized groan, he quickly squeezed them shut again, feeling the light pounding of a certain hangover starting up. What the hell had he done to himself last night? His memories had a fuzzy, surreal quality that made him start to feel vaguely angry. There was something important he needed to remember. With a sigh, knowing he'd have to start at the beginning and think his way through everything, he got down to business.

The first bad moment came when he remembered Ibuki's arm tight around Hitori's waist, and the feelings that had accompanied the image. That sort of irrational anger made him squirm a little, especially when it was directed towards a person he considered such a close friend. The beginning of the descent into alcohol induced haze quickly followed, and he sat straight up in bed when he remembered his drunken need to go find Hitori during the fireworks. That desire to have a moment with her, to share even something as small as a wish, had eventually led him to the roof of the tower.

He'd never made it to the top of the stairs. Even now he wasn't entirely sure what stopped him, but leaning back against the wall, he'd cocked his head to the side, and then felt his heart crumbling to dust. Hitori's voice, the way she'd said Gaara's name, had left no doubt in the tiny Anbu's mind what he'd nearly interrupted. The sound floated through his mind again, and that same swift pain contracted his chest, making him feel as if he couldn't breathe.

_Why do you still breathe?_

It was a good question. Yomi felt paralyzed, and he desperately tried to steer his mind away from what he'd forced it to remember. Ruka's cold face filled his thoughts. He needed to go tell someone that Ruka was here. Feeling the threat of tears in his eyes, the tiny Anbu forced himself out of bed, ignoring the sickness in his stomach and struggling into his clothes. As his hand closed over the doorknob, he decided what he would do. Maybe it was sneaky, and Hitori might very well hate him for it later, if he lived through it, but he was willing to risk that pain to save her life.

His mind made up, Yomi began jogging down the hall towards the door. He had something he needed to take care of first, but then he'd head for Ibuki's room.

Hitori stretched with her eyes still closed, consciousness creeping over her. There were strange, but pleasant aches in her body that reminded her rather forcefully of the night before. As a light blush suffused her cheeks with color, she finally let her eyes blink open and sat up slowly, careful not to disturb the warm figure beside her.

Asleep, Gaara's face had an almost innocent quality to it that pulled at her heart. His messy hair fell over his forehead hiding his closed eyes, and she had to force herself not to give in to the impulse to brush it away. Sorrow stabbed at her and made her turn away. Maybe someday he would understand why she'd changed her mind, and she could only hope he wouldn't hurt too much, for too long. With a regretful glance back at him, she slipped quietly out of the bed and into the now very wrinkled yukata laying on the floor. She started to feel a sense of time slipping away from her as she hastily tied the thin obijime around her waist, entirely ignoring the obi and geta when she ran out the door.

Ibuki peeked out of his room through half open, sleepy eyes, irritated to be woken so abruptly by the annoying, persistent knocking.

"Let me in, neko boy. It's important," the tiny Anbu hissed, practically bouncing from foot to foot with impatience. Ibuki didn't say a word. He just walked away from the door and crawled back into his bed, pulling the blanket up to his chin as he rolled over, turning his back towards his friend. "Oh no. You won't want to do that after what I'm going to tell you."

"Why are you up this early, Yomi kun?" Glancing back with a sigh, the Anbu cracked one eye open to semi-glare at the other man before he yawned hugely. "What could possibly-"

"Ruka is here." Yomi felt a distinct sense of satisfaction as Ibuki sat straight up in bed, his eyes no longer looking the slightest bit tired or disinterested. "Good. Get dressed... We're going hunting."

"Does anyone else know?" Ibuki's voice was low and calm as he dressed, already strapping his Anbu armor over his usual clothes.

"Nisei knows. She's the one who spotted him last night." Yomi was impressed with just how quickly his friend was moving. Even though the younger Anbu occasionally annoyed him beyond belief, or made Yomi want to punch him, it was the moments like this one that reminded him of why he respected Ibuki. That, and his fighting abilities. When Ibuki said he was the best with his hands, he wasn't lying. "But as for Kankurou, Gaara, or Hitori..." he nearly stuttered over her name, and angrily shook his head before continuing. "No. I don't think so."

"And you don't intend to tell them, do you?" The ninjato made a soft sound as Ibuki slid it into the sheath on his back and turned to regard Yomi thoughtfully. There was a hurt, almost defeated look to him that a hangover wouldn't account for, and he hadn't missed the way Yomi's voice seemed to break when he said Hitori's name. It was a bad idea to let his friend run off in search of a fight if his head wasn't in the right place. "What happened?"

Another swift flash of pain passed over Yomi's face before he shook his head. "That bastard isn't going to have a chance at her." Golden brown eyes held a deadly serious look when they captured Ibuki's even, pale blue gaze. "She deserves to be happy, for once." He turned to walk out without looking back, fully expecting Ibuki to follow, and the Anbu didn't disappoint him. Nodding to himself, Ibuki decided to remain quiet. If the need arose, he would prevent Yomi from doing anything irrational or foolish, but he couldn't try to stop his friend when this obviously meant so much to him. It was only natural to want to protect the one you love.

Hitori had just finished strapping on her Anbu armor when she heard a soft sound behind her, and turned to see Gaara leaning against the door. Her eyes closed at the look of mixed hurt and disappointment on his face, and his hand dropped to turn the lock before he stepped towards her.

"You've changed your mind." His deep voice sounded rough, and he made no move to touch her, merely crossing his arms slowly over his bare chest as her eyes opened again.

"I... " She looked away, unable to face the questions in his eyes. The right words, as always, didn't seem to want to come, and without them she didn't know how to explain her need to stop the sorrow that plagued her mind. Pain threatened to overwhelm her as she angrily wiped at the tears that insisted upon spilling down her cheeks. Only then did he move towards her again, and a choking sob burst from her chest when her Anbu armor began to fall to the floor, his fingers moving quickly to unstrap each piece.

"Don't go." The words were quiet and harsh against her ear as she found herself nearly crushed in the warmth of his embrace. "I won't let you..." His face pressed against the side of her neck and after a moment she felt a single warm drop slide over her skin. It was immediately followed by another, and she closed her eyes tightly as her arms went around him.

"No matter what I do, I cause you pain." The words hurt, a bone deep ache that left her feeling lost and powerless, and Gaara leaned away from her just enough to turn her face up to his. Hitori averted her gaze, desperately trying to avoid looking at him, but his patient silence defeated her, and their eyes finally met.

"Even if you are sometimes the cause of my pain," he leaned closer to her, their noses just touching, "you are always the only cure for it." She wasn't given the chance to reply, his mouth covering hers immediately with an almost bruising force. Staggering backwards, she could feel the desperation coming from him, and her fingers tightened on his shoulders as her back met the wall violently. A loud gasp came from her when her hands were ripped away from him as he roughly pinned her arms to the hard surface and pulled away a little to look down at her. She could tell that he was struggling to calm himself down, loosening his nearly damaging grip, bit by bit.

One hand released her to let him trail his fingers slowly over several of the dark marks he'd left on her skin the night before. Her eyes closed as he continued to touch the tender, bruised flesh. "Gaara..."

"It's hard enough to know that I might lose you, without being given the chance to fight for you." Both of his hands raised to take her face firmly between them, and her eyes fluttered open at the pressure to meet the steady gaze of his turquoise eyes, just inches from her own. "We're stronger together. That's part of what love is."

She could feel herself cracking even before his lips met hers again, and with the rush of feeling that followed, her resolve shattered. Hitori's arms wound around his neck and she pressed against him, forcing away her doubts and fears. Gaara nearly sighed, holding her tighter as he felt the change. The sun was rising fast outside the window, and somehow they both knew that this day would likely bring what they dreaded.

Ibuki frowned hard at the tiny Anbu's back as they ran towards the training area. He already didn't like Yomi's plan. It left too much to chance, and it left Yomi entirely too vulnerable if something should go wrong. A heavy sigh escaped him as his friend stopped and turned towards him. Ibuki knew there was no way he'd change Yomi's mind, now. The man was unbelievably stubborn when he thought he was right.

"I'm counting on you." Yomi could see Ibuki's disapproval written all over his pretty face, but he knew his friend would do as he'd been asked in spite of it, and that was all he needed. "Let's go." They headed towards the gate in silence, Ibuki following far behind Yomi. The small man seemed to have some sense of where to go once they left the village, almost as if he was hunting down a scent. Ibuki slowed even more as they drew close to the large mass of dunes and rocks where Yomi seemed certain Ruka was hiding out. All the caves in the area, including one with a fresh water spring inside, and the area's proximity to Sunagakure made it the most logical choice.

As Yomi disappeared from his view, Ibuki started climbing, uttering a short, whispered prayer for the safety of his friend. By the time he reached the top and looked down, he knew his breath hadn't been wasted.

"Clever," Ruka said softly as Yomi walked towards him, his face betraying nothing even though his dark eyes narrowed at the small man. "I'm surprised to see you here alone."

"I don't need help to take down the likes of you," Yomi growled as he slid his ninjato from his back and held it loosely in his hand, already moving into a fighting stance. "You made this personal."

"Oh, but it is personal, Yomi." The scorn in Ruka's voice when he uttered Yomi's name made the Anbu grit his teeth, though he refused to let the rage within him flow free. He knew all too well that uncontrolled emotions were likely to get you killed. Instead, he would harness it and use it to his advantage, a distinct advantage that his opponent didn't have. Ruka almost smirked as he drew his own weapon free and closed with his former student. "I hope you're not as disappointing as you used to be."

"As pleasant as it's been chatting with you," Yomi grinned, also moving forward, his weapon at the ready, "I'm afraid it's already time to say goodbye, sensei." A blur of motion followed his words, and the echoes of crashing steel resounded loudly within the open space between the large rocks.

Ibuki leaned forward, tensed and waiting for the right moment. He watched carefully as the two exchanged blows, seemingly evenly matched with their blades. Each shriek of steel on steel made him grip more tightly onto the rocky ledge, and he had to bite his lip to keep from shouting encouragement when Yomi drew first blood.

It was a satisfying feeling to see the crimson stain slowly spreading through Ruka's sandy colored shirt, but Yomi didn't stop to gloat, bringing his weapon around in another curving arc aimed straight for the man's neck. The tip of his blade just barely caught the side of Ruka's face, in spite of being blocked, and the tiny Anbu smiled grimly as his former teacher pushed him backwards, those dark eyes only growing colder.

"Cocky, aren't we?" Ruka hissed as he sprang forward, his blade leading. At the last moment he changed the direction of the swing and felt his own satisfaction as it sliced deeply into Yomi's thigh. "That's the same weakness you've always had, Yomi. I can't say I'm surprised, though I figured you would have learned by now."

Yomi's eyes widened as the steel withdrew from his flesh, but he clenched his jaw against the pain and moved forward, knowing the other man wouldn't expect it so soon. His blade bit into Ruka's side, though not very deeply, and he dragged it back towards himself, cursing his weakening body when he felt dizziness already threatening to overwhelm him. The bastard must've cut him deeper than he'd thought.

Ibuki watched in horror as Yomi started slowly sinking to his knees, seemingly oblivious to Ruka's weapon raising for the killing blow. Without thinking, the Anbu leaped down, drawing his own blade as he fell, and landing in front of Yomi just in time. Ibuki gasped when Ruka's free hand came up to knock his sword arm away, and the descending blade never slowed. Steel pierced cleanly through Ibuki's chest, the weapon just missing his heart, and he was certain he didn't even feel it until it burst through his back. A moment later Ruka jerked the blade up with an almost amused look on his face, before pulling it free and watching Ibuki collapse to the ground. He bowed mockingly at the pair and turned to walk away, disappearing like an apparition between the rocks surrounding them.

"Ibuki!!" The scream tore itself from Yomi's throat when his friend landed atop him, and the tiny Anbu felt tears stinging his eyes as Ibuki's blood poured out over him. He struggled into a sitting position and pulled the taller Anbu across his lap, tearing at his shirt to see the extent of the damage. Pale blue eyes fluttered open, and Ibuki tried to speak as blood leaked from between his lips. "No, Ibuki, don't talk... I.... Why did you do something so stupid?" His head fell forward to rest against his friend's at the sight of the ghastly wound, and the tears started to flow.

"You... you're my best friend, Yomi." Coughing followed the weak whisper, and brought more blood to spill down Ibuki's chin. "I don't want to die... with your anger... in my ears."

"I refuse to let you die!" Yomi tried to stand, and nearly fell, but he managed to find some fount of untapped strength within him, that let him lift Ibuki into his arms, and start moving slowly forward.

"Promise me you'll keep her safe." The words were hard to understand through the blood that seemed to be filling his mouth with each strained breath the Anbu drew. "I... am sorry I failed you."

"Just shut up, Ibuki. Stop wasting your strength." Grim determination had settled on Yomi's face as he moved faster, his legs seeming to be possessed. He couldn't even feel them anymore. "You didn't fail anything. You never have."

He didn't miss the smile that spread over Ibuki's face, or the way his pale eyes slowly closed. "Thank... you."

The gates loomed just ahead when Ibuki let out his last shuddering breath, and Yomi crashed painfully to his knees as a scream of rage erupted from him. Pushing the hair away from Ibuki's face, he didn't bother to try to stop the tears that fell from his eyes to run slowly down his friend's cheek.

Ibuki's perfect, peaceful smile was the last thing Yomi saw before darkness claimed him.

---------

End of chapter. Thanks for reading.


	24. 終わり The End

Moon's Light, Reality's Dream  
月の光、うつつの夢  
Chapter Twenty Two - 終わり _(The End)  
_

どこまで歩いても終わりが見えない 過去の記憶を道連れに_  
No matter how far I walk, I cannot see the end. Dragging along memories of the past._  
此の身は何色に染まりゆくのだろう 答えを探している_  
I wonder what color this body will be tainted by. I search for that answer_

_----_

[すり抜けて蝶の羽を狩る スパイダー_  
The spider slips out, hunting butterfly's wings_]

Hitori stopped and crouched down in the hot sand, trying to convince herself that she was only checking the armor strapped to her leg, but knowing she'd paused to give herself one last chance to look back. Her gaze was immediately drawn to the tower, though the view was obscured by the smoke that was already rising. The attack had come almost exactly as they'd expected it, only much larger. Black clad shinobi seemed to form a wave that swept through Sunagakure like a tsunami, badly outnumbering the defenders.

_'I'm sorry.'_

That's not why she was out here, alone, and hunting her former teacher, though. Her eyes closed tightly as her hands curled into fists, remembering the sight in the hospital. She hadn't wanted to believe it at first, and she'd gone on her own, leaving Gaara and Kankurou to worry about the safety of the village. Maybe it was crazy, but she needed to see for herself that what the messenger told them was true.

_Yomi wasn't yet conscious when she leaned over to kiss his pale forehead. Hitori simply stared at her former partner, while the medic quietly repeated to her what the guards who'd brought the two in had told him._

_"Ibuki," she whispered as she moved over towards him. Even now he was beautiful, smiling so serenely, with the stark white of the sheet drawn up to his neck detracting from the pallor of his skin. Her fingers brushed softly against his cold cheek as she leaned down to whisper next to his ear, the same words he'd said to her only the night before, that she finally, now understood. "It's the wish we make for those we love that really matters." Hitori let her hand drop away slowly as she straightened again, still looking at his peaceful face, and remembering the spark in his pale eyes. "I hope your dreams are beautiful."_

_"Hitori, I'm so sorry." Yomi's voice was barely even a harsh whisper, and it still managed to crack. She was at his side, clutching his hand tightly in both of hers before he'd even gotten just those few words out._

_"He wished for you to live," she said with a soft smile, as she lowered his hand back to the bed. "And he got that wish. There's no reason for you to apologize to me."_

Shaking her head, Hitori dragged herself back into the present, and double checked her weapons as she rose to her feet. Other thoughts tried to intrude, and for one long moment she allowed Gaara's face to fill her mind before blocking it out. Footsteps started up again, her long legs stretching as she gained speed, heading into what was mostly likely a trap. That didn't matter much. Ruka's sick game needed to end, even if she had to start off playing by his rules.

So much made sense, now, that had completely confused her before. Everything she felt, every emotion she once saw as a weakness, those were the things that actually made her stronger. She had a new purpose, one with a deeper meaning behind it than blind obedience to the whims of a madman. It felt like finding the missing part of yourself that made you whole, even though you hadn't known you were broken to begin with. Wishing, dreaming, hoping - all of these things weren't foolish, they were necessary. She slowed, cautiously approaching the area Yomi had described, and her tanto whispered with Death's mocking voice as she drew it from the sheath on her back. Hitori found herself grimly hoping it was a promise.

Gaara stood on the roof of the tower between Kankurou and Baki, his narrowed eyes moving constantly over the battleground of urban warfare that Suna had become. Every now and then, Kankurou would see his brother's head turn as he gazed out over the open desert Hitori had disappeared into, but those glances never lasted long. The puppet user couldn't begin to imagine what Gaara must be thinking and feeling, knowing that he'd had to let her go alone. They'd marched along to the beat of Ruka's drum this entire time, and now they were left with no choice but to see this mess through as best they could.

_'It's difficult to accept being so powerless.'_

Anger seethed within the redhead, as the realization that he'd been rendered personally useless to everyone he cared about grew stronger within him. Unless he went down into the streets to fight alongside the Suna shinobi and black ops, he could do little for his village that hadn't already been done. Baki and Kankurou would never allow him do such a thing, anyway. He was too 'valuable' to risk in combat of that nature. And Hitori... His eyes turned back to the rolling dunes, where he was convinced he could see her tracks through the sand, even though the light wind shifted it around in a constantly hazy cloud. Leaving Suna in the midst of an attack wasn't possible, either. There'd been no choice but to let her go on her own. Agitated sand swirled around his feet like the tail of an irate cat, and Gaara only frowned harder when Kankurou moved a step closer to him, his forehead furrowed in concern.

"I can-"

"No." Gaara didn't give his brother a chance to complete the sentence, because he already knew what Kankurou was going to say. "You saw Yomi and Ibuki." Two sets of equally angry eyes met and held. "Our battle is here."

"As you say," the puppet user answered in a chilly voice as he took a few steps back. "I'm going to go join in the fighting, then." He didn't wait for Gaara's reply, but ran for the stairs immediately, the angry slam of the door into the office loudly punctuating his departure.

"Kazekage sama," Baki began hesitantly, rubbing at his eyes a little as he squinted out over the miles of sand outside the walls. Gaara had never heard quite that tone of voice from the man before, and turned to see what he was looking at. "Lightning." Even as Baki spoke the word, a jagged bolt of bluish white pierced the cloudless sky, and arced towards the sand below. It left a hollow feeling in the pit of the redhead's stomach as he watched a thin plume of smoke rising into the air.

_'I don't want to fight alone.'_

Ruka smirked when the clone of Hitori melted into a pile of smoking earth. He'd honestly expected no less from the girl who'd formerly been his star pupil, and possibly the best ninja he'd ever seen. Three lightning strikes, and she'd dodged them all. It would come down to their blades, and he'd known that from the start. He looked forward to it with an almost sadistic sense of pleasure.

"Impressive." His eyes never stopped moving, nor did his feet, as he scanned the rocky area around himself. Hitori had burst upon him like a firestorm, dodging every trap he'd laid for her with an efficiency that made him proud. A change in the air caused Ruka to spin abruptly, his ninjato raising by instinct to catch the tanto aimed for his head as she crashed into him, staggering him back several steps. "I see you haven't lost your skill." Dark eyes roamed rudely over her form and he laughed harshly. "Though it appears that's the only thing you haven't lost."

Hitori's reply came in the form of a shriek of tortured metal as she slid her blade along the keen edge of his, down towards his chest. He darted backwards, pushing her away as well, which was exactly what she wanted him to do. Before either had time to blink, she'd flung three kunai at him and was already on the move again. Ruka's blade whipped out and knocked the projectiles harmlessly aside as he circled to the left, narrowing his eyes at her.

"I'm surprised the boy Kage didn't lock you up." In a blur, Hitori closed with him again, though her face never changed expression. Ruka couldn't tell if his taunts were having any effect on her at all. The unbelievable speed and strength of each strike made him unwillingly retreat, and forced him to maintain a defensive stance, unable to do anything more than parry each blow. "Or did he already tire of you?"

"I didn't come here to talk," she growled, driving his blade up and away from their bodies just enough to allow her to stab forward with the kunai in her free hand. Ruka blinked at her as the dagger pierced into his flesh beneath the shoulder of his sword arm, and then grinned evilly, moving back before she could yank it free.

"It's a shame about your pretty little friend." His grin only grew wider and Hitori's eyes narrowed dangerously, both of her hands wrapped around the hilt of her tanto as she drove his blade towards his face with a bone shattering strike. Ruka released his ninjato at the last moment and dove to the side as it flew by his head, his hands quickly moving to form the seals: Boar, Ram, Snake. The girl let herself hit the ground, and rolled forward, knowing better than to try to halt her momentum. She was running towards him again immediately, but by then he'd had enough time to complete the jutsu.

"_Raiton: Jibashi._"

Hitori's eyes widened as the wave of lightning surged from his hands. There was no chance to dodge, no place to hide, and no jutsu she could call up fast enough to keep the electricity from catching her, this time. She wondered if she would end up being forced to use the jutsu Danzou taught her, and then thought ceased as pain burned throughout her body, ripping a scream from her, as her tanto fell from nerveless fingers to lay in the sand. It was only seconds before she collapsed beside it, smoke rising lazily from her clothes. Half open jade eyes fixed on Ruka's cold, smirking face as he slowly advanced towards her.

Shaking his head ruefully, he crouched beside her and then moved forward, straddling her still twitching body to hold her to the ground, showing her the wicked, curved blade in his hand that glittered with the promise of the agony yet to come. "I see the boy left his marks," Ruka laughed softly, his eyes nearly dancing with perverse enjoyment as he trailed the razor sharp tip of the dagger over one of the bruised spots just below her collarbone, watching her skin part like tissue paper to release thin streams of blood. "Mine will be much more... permanent."

'_You won't be alone.'_

Swearing, struggling, and complaining loudly, Yomi somehow managed to drag himself towards the tower. Sweat covered his sickly, pallid skin as he leaned forward, resting his hands on his knees. When he could finally raise his head, he found himself face to face with Kankurou. Why was the fool just standing here when war was waging around them, and Hitori was alone in the desert fighting for her life? The tiny Anbu had seen all three of the lightning strikes as he slowly made his way here, and expected to find both the Kazekage and his brother gone. Drawing himself up to his full, unimpressive height, Yomi stalked towards Kankurou, wrapping his hands in the puppet user's clothes as he leaned up on his toes towards him.

"What in the hell are you doing?" he growled, ignoring the dizziness that threatened to send him sprawling at any moment, and pretending that his grip on the other wasn't the only thing keeping him upright. "She needs you, us..."

"Do you think I don't know that?" Kankurou hissed back, though he didn't pry Yomi's hands away, knowing the Anbu would crumple into a heap if he did. "Why are you out of bed?"

"Fuck bed." Bright red spots started slowly appearing in Yomi's cheeks. Anguished golden eyes slowly closed as his grip loosened, and he sank to his knees. "I'd be out there with her, except I'd never make it." With a sound of pure, tortured rage, the Anbu slammed his fists down, oblivious to the pain and the blood that followed.

"I'm not free to make that choice, Yomi." The puppet user kept his eyes fixed on the battles still raging through the streets near them, though he couldn't keep his voice from wavering with anger.

"The hell you're not!" The anger in his tone started to fade as he thought about the position Kankurou was stuck in, but he shook his head and continued on. "She's never beaten Ruka in any match. The best she ever managed was a draw."

Unconsciousness was relentlessly chasing him down, and Yomi lacked the strength to keep running from it. None of the words he could think of now, to try and convince his friend, made any sense at all. The darkness closing in on him was warm and inviting, promising a surcease of pain, worry, and fear, at least for a little while, and he longed to embrace it. He fell over on his side as his eyes slowly fluttered closed, and Ibuki's last wish whispered through Yomi's mind.

_'Promise me... '_

"I made a promise that I can't keep." It took everything Yomi had left in him to force his eyes even halfway open to meet Kankurou's. "I'm asking you to keep it for me. For Ibuki... and for your brother." A soft sigh followed his words as he surrendered to his dimming mind. "Keep her safe."

With a groan, Kankurou lifted Yomi up, carrying him inside the tower and to his room, easing the tiny Anbu down onto his bed. "Ne, I'll do what I can, Yomi." Just before he turned away, a small smile slowly tugged at Yomi's lips, and to the puppet user, it felt more like a thank you than anything.

Blood splattered across Ruka's face as he dragged his knife over her chest just below her neck, letting it bite deep into the flesh before he leaned back, sensing something different in the air around him. Those few seconds of inattention proved to be all Hitori needed, her eyes snapping open as she pushed herself up, flinging Ruka backwards onto the ground, and trying to get her fingers to grip more tightly around the tanto she snatched up. There was still a lingering numbness in her extremities, though she'd felt every cut of the dagger he'd put to her body. It was hard to say which of them was wearing more of her blood.

Moving quickly, Ruka retrieved his fallen ninjato, though he kept the curved knife in his other hand, as they began slowly advancing on each other again. Something wasn't right, he was sure of it, but he couldn't take his eyes away from Hitori long enough to scan around, not without risking giving her an opening he couldn't afford. She didn't even seem slowed by the damage he'd done when he had her pinned to the ground and helpless beneath him, and he found it very difficult to suppress the rush of twisted pride that flashed through him again.

As she closed with him, Hitori reached behind her for the second, shorter blade she'd concealed in a false bottom of the of the tanto's sheath. It had been Ibuki's idea, a strategy that Ruka wouldn't expect her to come up with on her own, and both the young Anbu and Yomi had trained with her, to rid her of the awkwardness of handling two blades. The imminence of attack had spurred her into learning quickly, and she'd excelled at it.

She blocked the curved dagger with the shorter weapon, and was surprised to not feel any sense of satisfaction whatsoever as her tanto pierced his body just below his ribs. With a soft grunt, she slammed it through the slight resistance and her face settled into a grim line as the blade ruptured through his back, leaving her hand resting almost against him where it wrapped around the hilt.

A smile spread slowly over Ruka's face as blood leaked from the corner of his mouth, and Hitori registered a sensation of warmth that caused her to glance down, surprised to see two hands firmly holding the blade of the sword that had entered her body, in the same place she'd struck her erstwhile teacher. Only then did she feel the form pressing against her back, and the arms closing her in, as Gaara held tightly to Ruka's weapon, refusing to let it pierce further into Hitori.

"Fight harder," Ruka choked out the words as he struggled to remain on his feet, continuously pushing his ninjato, trying to force it past the grip that held it off. "I'll still take you with me."

"Kill him." The pain from her wounds seemed to lessen when she heard Gaara's voice at her ear, and Hitori tried to pull her weapon up, or out of Ruka's body, but she somehow seemed to lack the strength to do so with only one hand.

"Stalemate," the Anbu laughed harshly. "The moment he weakens, I'll shove this blade through both of you." Ruka's ninjato move forward another inch, and Hitori gasped loudly as it drove deeper into her body. She could hear Gaara swearing, and she knew that if he let go with even one hand to attempt to use a jutsu, the blade would finish it's motion completely through her before he could kill the Root Anbu.

"Stalemate?" she half whispered, as she turned her sword inside him and started wrenching it sideways, widening the wound with agonizing slowness. The way Hitori had to twist herself to move the tanto caused more damage to her own body as well, but it was minimal compared to what she was doing to Ruka. "We'll see who drops first, sensei."

Ruka started to speak again, but a shadow rose behind him, hovering menacingly for a long moment before a flurry of steel ripped into his flesh. Shock spread over his face and he fell backwards, sliding off of Hitori's blade as he released his own. The puppet's attack didn't cease until the Anbu was nothing more than an unrecognizable lump of gore on the ground.

Gaara eased the ninjato out of Hitori's body and tossed it away, his palms pressing tightly over the wound as he lowered them both to the ground, leaning her back against him. He frowned lightly as her eyes fluttered closed and a soft sigh escaped her.

"It's over." Hitori's voice was weak, and with each heavy beat of her heart, more blood oozed between Gaara's fingers, no matter how hard he held his hands against her. Kankurou looked over at them as he dismissed the puppet, and rolled the scroll back up hurriedly.

"There's supposed to be a team just behind me. I'm gonna go speed them up." He darted off, glancing back over his shoulder a few times before he disappeared from view, and unable to hide the concerned look on his face.

The words were almost unintelligible and meaningless to Gaara while he stared down at Hitori, watching her paling as her blood kept spilling. Had they come this far, and fought this hard, only to lose in the end? It didn't seem right, or fair, but then again, few things in this life ever were. There were so many wounds, all over her, that he didn't know how she'd still been able to fight, or been strong enough to hold off Ruka at all.

"Aishiteru, Gaara," she whispered, and more blood flecked her lips with each word. Was this her way of saying goodbye? He pushed that worry from his mind when a new thought occurred to him. As if she'd heard his silent questioning, she'd given him the answer he'd been searching for.

"Ore mo aishiteru yo." He leaned his head against hers gently, closing his eyes and just listening - for the sounds of the team approaching, for the quiet breaths she drew in and let out, and for the soft, slow beating of her heart. Her skin felt cool against his, a marked contrast to the heat washing over his hands. Gaara glanced up at the noise of people rapidly getting closer, but a small movement from her drew his gaze back immediately.

Hitori's head slowly turned up to his, and her eyes cracked open as she smiled a little. "Time to tell a new story." Gaara held her gaze as he pondered the meaning of her statement. This was the moment, wasn't it? Would she spread her now unfettered wings like the butterfly he'd so often compared her to, and take flight into the promise of all the tomorrows left for them?

"How does it go?" He couldn't help but smile back at her as they found themselves being quickly surrounded. Frantic medics pulled her gently away from him and set to work immediately, though no one tried to stop her hand from reaching out for his. Their bloody fingers twined tightly together, and even through the other voices and sounds, he heard her soft reply clearly. Her words gave him a reason to let himself dare to hope.

"We haven't written it yet."

---------

It wasn't easy, saying goodbye. In fact, Nisei was certain that she didn't know how to, she'd never learned it properly. To simplify all of her thoughts and feelings into an ordinary speech didn't seem like it would be enough, though she'd written the flimsy words regardless of what she felt. Tsunade would roast her if she didn't have the meaningless prop of this paper in her hand. Even as she took in the sight of the graduating Anbu before her, she could feel something else swelling in her heart. Now definitely wasn't the time for doubts, or to feel that these young trainees still weren't ready, and might never be.

Ibuki's death was enough proof of just how unready these shinobi often were, and he'd been counted as one of the best. Could she really sit back at the end of the day, and think that she'd taught her three Anbu perfectly, making sure they knew everything they'd need to survive whatever awaited them? Would guilt rest upon her shoulders as a continuous burden should anything ever happen to them? It was true that once these students stepped out of the Anbu training facilities, they would no longer be hers, but Konoha's to use however was deemed necessary. It's not like Nisei tried to protect them from danger during previous missions, but at least she'd been there alongside them.

There, to stop things from turning into a disaster.

Her hand trembled slightly as she stepped up to the podium, and prepared herself to give her unwritten, unrehearsed speech. The scribbled words on the page in her hand amounted to only a few coherent sentences. She would wing this to the fullest potential. The topaz eyes burning into her threatened to grow angry should Nisei fail to produce what was expected of her. Tsunade never could tolerate her favored Anbu looking like the black sheep, since the truth was the complete opposite. Nisei had always been more, so much more, and would never be anything less.

"Thank you all for coming." The greeting was simple, easy enough, and Nisei swallowed thickly as she tried to calm her nerves down. Easily half of the village had turned out for this occasion, even Kouki, though she didn't know how he'd managed to drag himself out of bed. Then again, he was elite, and duty meant more to him than his personal feelings. His two students stood in perfect formation, obviously struggling to withhold the tears caused by the loss of their missing teammate. The sight struck her, putting a new spin on her perspective. Now, it made perfect sense. "Today we celebrate the promise of a new generation in the shinobi world. These young ninja you see before you have been trained under the best supervision, and are ready to protect their village by carrying out careful and precise operations…"

Careful and precise? Was that how things really were, or did they all just manage to cover up the fact that occasionally they were all idiots? Nisei's thoughts began racing frantically when she realized that what she was saying hardly made any sense. Everyone would act on their own impulses, and those impulses would either get you killed, or make you a hero. Her eyes roamed slowly over the room, and she studied each of the young faces she'd just referred to. It made her wonder with curious hope about this 'new' generation, and if they were truly ready, even if they had been taught the laws of the shinobi realm.

"Parents, you should be proud to have such brave ninja welcomed into Anbu. Their acceptance means that they have very unique skills, and absolute dedication to their village. They will sacrifice every ounce of sweat and blood. They're ready to be the strength that you rely on when this world seems to go dark. If there is a war, they are ready to charge in without thinking twice. Their pledge…" Nisei trailed off, as her voice grew softer the more she realized that what she was saying wasn't why she had joined Anbu at all. Every word that left her lips felt like a lie. The one reason she'd joined, the one person she wanted to overcome…

"…thank you, everyone, for your hard work. May the future become the reality of the safe, peaceful dream we're fighting for! Congratulations, Anbu!" Nisei's eyes darted to Ishida as he raised his arm high and gave her a thumb's up. Ayu beamed back a smile as her fingers pressed into Koji's cheeks, trying to make him grin. Her team had always been the goofs of Anbu, and for that, they would most likely pay dearly during a mission one day. Nisei sighed a little in relief, delighted when the sound of clapping filled the room. It was a celebration, after all.

With a slow smile, the Anbu captain stepped away from her seemingly godly spot and continued on, matching the strides of the Hokage step for step. Nisei wordlessly offered the paper in her hand, and watched as the blond unfolded it. Dark golden eyes skimmed rapidly over it, before a twisted, sour smile appeared on Tsunade's face. Nisei was sure that gambler had plenty of angry words she wanted to say, but wouldn't, due to fact that the speech was over, and the lack of preparation had been somewhat humorous.

"I bet you're proud of yourself, too." Tsunade said as she rested a hand on her waist. It was hard not to smile, especially as the taunting realization that Nisei had, in a way, betrayed her, dawned in her mind. "Was it easy to tell your Hokage you wrote a speech that you really didn't, or do you think me so gullible that I would miss your obvious lie, Nisei?"

As she shook her head, Nisei's eyes met Kouki's, and she wondered why she couldn't help being rude today. "I can't always be perfect." After a sound of annoyance, Tsunade walked away, secretly admiring the new attitude that she felt was most becoming in her favored Anbu. Exhausted, Kouki slumped against the wall, waiting for the room to clear, and Nisei lowered her gaze to the floor. He was really in horrible shape. No matter how many times death had occurred in Kouki's life, nothing had ever been quite this close to home before.

"I'm sorry to hear about Ibuki," Nisei hesitantly began, not quite sure how to formulate the right words. Every time Nisei apologized for the death of another, it didn't seem to ease the situation, but instead amplified it. Kouki's eyes didn't indicate that he was even paying any attention, so she continued. "I know how hard it can be to lose someone. Ibuki, he was…I mean he sacrificed himself in order to save another human being."

"That doesn't make it any less severe." The blunt tone of Kouki's voice caused Nisei to snap to alertness. He sounded like he was on edge, and he had every right to be, but tension started to flow through her body, making it feel difficult to breathe. His icy stare was locked onto her now, and she watched the curve of his full lips twisting into a lazy smirk. "I really thought that he was conceited enough to not do something that reckless. It wasn't his business to get involved in that mess, but he did whatever he wanted to, anyway. That was always his downfall. Just when I think Ibuki would never sacrifice himself that way, he does it, as if to prove me wrong."

"Ibuki felt like he was doing the right thing," Nisei said, before briefly wondering if her words would reach the blonde Captain at all. "Yomi and Ibuki were pretty close, weren't they? I mean friends-wise, in a fun way. Can you not understand that Ibuki valued Yomi's life more than his own? You're being selfish, and I swear it hardly seems like you care-"

"Don't care?!" Nisei found herself suddenly held by Kouki's hands gripping her arms tightly. The crowd was long gone, but for him to act this way, at this moment, only proved just how affected he really was. "Every single thing I've done has clearly demonstrated that I've cared, and that I've loved. I'm being forced to let two of the most important things in my life, die. I have to let Ibuki die, and I have to let my dreams of ever being with you die, and it hurts. It hurts in ways I didn't even know existed. So, the next time you want to tell me that I don't care, you just think about that."

Nisei's eyes narrowed at him, as his growing anger became more evident in his heated expression. Her upper arms were becoming numb, but he wouldn't let go of her, not until he, in some way or another, fully expressed himself. His lips met hers in a slow kiss, going between her top and bottom lip, before he stilled. Feeling her lips, breathing in her air, tasting and being with her – this was everything that he'd always wanted…? This moment, here and now, when time washed away, and was replaced by something new. He wanted to remain like this, to remain here forever.

He released her gently to run his fingers through her hair, feeling the long, soft strands of midnight silk sliding over his skin. Kouki always felt that right here was where he needed to be, for both his and her sake. Even if Nisei stood there and allowed him to say goodbye to the love that he had for her, goodbye to his dreams and lost reality, he wondered if it could ever truly be enough. He settled his hand on her lower back and brought her closer. The moment their bodies touched, he felt a shock run up his spine. The strings on his heart pulled, and the squeezing painful feeling returned.

Again, Nisei didn't know how to say goodbye, and everything that came to mind seemed wrong. Kouki's other hand came up to the side of her neck, as he parted her lips again, tasting her one last time. The feeling that his lips left on hers lingered, nearly searing her mouth. It was a memory that would bring a feverish glow to her cheeks if she, when she, thought back on it. Kouki pulled away slowly, and she allowed his head to touch hers. The soft sigh that he released was followed by sharp breath that made her wonder if he was crying.

"I love you."

There they were, the three simple words that doomed Nisei's thoughts. Kouki loved her in a way that she would never be able to return, and he knew it. Those three daunting words were in the air long before Kouki actually said them. Nisei had known for years that the feelings Kouki harbored for her were there. He'd taken care of her, and pieced her back together so many times. Kouki was the one who'd brought her back to life.

"Thank you, Kouki…" As the words escaped in a gentle whisper, she felt his lips brush over her temple, leaving a soft kiss there. It was his form of letting her go, and she was thankful that it had been this hard. She didn't feel she deserved the easy way out. It was true that she'd had her pick of two great men, and the one that had hurt her most had won in the end. That said a lot about the leniency she deserved from Kouki.

As her best friend, the elite captain only saw this outcome as fitting. Nisei belonged to the man whom Kouki despised, and would utterly loathe, if Kakashi wasn't someone who deserved respect. Kouki couldn't deny that the Copy ninja deserved _his_ Nisei. He watched the tan cloak flutter into the air as Nisei slipped her arms through the sleeves. This time Kouki smiled, a real smile that couldn't be stopped even if he'd wanted to, and he looked towards the ceiling. Nisei left without another word passing between them, and took her first step into a long awaited vacation.

When the leaves began to fall, and the flowers peeled away, their blooming at an end, she would then return to her ritual of training the strong, making them even stronger still, and good enough to be called Anbu. As for right now, she could only think of renewing a relationship, or perhaps it was more like mending one. The answers that Kakashi so badly craved, like a stubborn child with a heated temper, would be given in full. With the new time on her hands, the captain found herself in the position to track down the Jonin, and tell him exactly how she felt, without complications barring her way.

It was idiotic to deny the feelings that only she could respond to, and she wondered if Kakashi had grown impatient by now. Her hand knocked on the green door as she stood there and looked up at the apartment. The books were on sale downstairs, and the most frequent buyer wasn't there. He was always on the move. Whether it was training or a mission, Kakashi could never stay in one place for any length of time. Neither could their relationship, Nisei mused, as she looked around, waiting for long, tantalizing moments. These profound confessions wanted to be let out now.

Just as she turned to walk away, she heard the door quietly opening behind her. There, in those ridiculous blue plaid pajamas, stood an exhausted Kakashi. He didn't look surprised to see her. Then again, she was the one convinced that his face was permanently stuck in a dull expression, or even sometimes entirely blank. She stepped inside his apartment, and jumped slightly when the door closed behind her. It was hard to remember that she was the one who'd come to confess, and he was merely the person who had to listen.

"I realized something, today." Nisei grasped for the words that would let her start at the beginning. Kakashi was the one who'd made her into who, and what, she now was. "Everything that I've done up until this moment has been selfish. When I first saw you, I wanted to be just like you. I wanted to become a Captain, and when you said I couldn't, well..."

"That's what you came all the way over here to say?" Kakashi closed the orange book on his table, and looked at her skeptically with his set of mismatched eyes. "Things that I already know, Nisei?" He laughed as he shook his silver haired head at her, "I really don't have time for this. I ruined your life. You went out of your way to show me just how badly I messed it up, and became an Anbu captain."

She was taken aback by his casual cruelty before she laughed sadly. "That's not all I wanted to say. I love you. I mean it, that I do. I always have, and that was the point. I wanted to overcome who you were to me. I strived to become stronger, because in a way, I knew that you wanted me to…I knew that you were fond of me, and you wouldn't have liked it if I had simply listened to you, and became less. I have loved you every single day, since the day that you, in your own way, abandoned me."

Even though she'd finally said it, the air in the room started to close in on her, and she started to feel like she wasn't able to breathe, anymore. This was when Kakashi was supposed to say something sweet, or clever. The Anbu captain would even settle for sarcasm. The mental clock in her mind started to tick on, as she looked at him. Red and onyx quickly glanced elsewhere, and her shoulders slumped as her mind became enraptured by nervous thoughts. Maybe this was all just a big joke, especially the part where she actually spilled everything.

Was he laughing at her?

The silence grew quickly and seemed to consume time itself. When it became too much to bear, with his eyes burning into her skin, Nisei began to wonder if she would break. The Jonin let her words slowly sink in, as he tried to determine if they were the truth, or just another game. He wanted her to want to be loved in return. If she was ready for a commitment, he needed to know that for certain. As he crossed the short distance, she could feel his presaging steps moving across the floorboards. She couldn't prevent the tinge of fear and excitement from quickly rising with his every action.

"I…It's what you wanted to hear, and it's what I needed to say." Her breath hitched in her throat when she felt his fingers draw her face up to look at him. Even with the Sharingan, he had a gentle expression, deeply searching her eyes for any trace of doubt. The tip of his thumb moved across the line of her bottom lip as he stared through her. Swallowing hard, Nisei tried again to rationalize her thoughts into words. "Please… say something…"

When no reply followed her plea, she started to shove him away. She'd put herself out there just for him to say nothing? An annoyed cry of frustration left her, as she made her way towards the door. She couldn't accept the fact that he was still conflicted, especially when it came to this topic. He'd said it so many times, but he couldn't say it back now? When she'd finally honestly admitted that she wanted to be with him, he was just going to look at her that way? She moved to open the door, and the pale hand above her head kept it shut.

"No, I don't want to stay here any longer with you!" She was furious, and that he wouldn't let her go caused her to become even more infuriated. "Kakashi! I mean it. I'm not in the mood for _your_ games. Do you understand me? I tell I love you and you just stand there? What the hell is your problem, anyway? Do you enjoy teasing me this way? Because it's not funny."

"You just did a perfect imitation of the thoughts that have been running through my head while I waited for your responses…Games and confessions, Nisei. It's not so much fun being on the receiving end, is it?" He pulled his mask down before his arms encircled her waist and lifted her up to her toes. Was he insane? He softly kissed her stunned lips. "I'm sorry, but you needed to understand me a little bit better, ne? You've been doing this to me the entire time, driving me absolutely crazy…"

He softly kissed her lips again, as she breathed slowly, tense from her still simmering anger. "You're a jerk, do you know that?"

"Somehow, I'm sure that you'll continue to remind me…" He locked the door behind him, and turned off the light as he carried her to his room. Breaking the kiss, she looked towards the previously obscured mess she had only glimpsed before, seeing that the room was a disaster and the mountains of books had returned. She was going to kill him. Kakashi turned her face back to his, as his teeth tugged at her bottom lip, distracting her from her dangerous intent. "I love you, Nisei, and if you loved me, you wouldn't care about the state of my habitat."

"A jerk!" Nisei cried out, before crashing onto his bed, and Kakashi followed her like a shadow over her body, his hands taking hers. The kiss he placed against her lips was soft, as her heart beat in a steady rhythm against his chest. This was just the beginning of the two destinies that were chosen to become aligned again. For awhile, it had been hard to catch up with the Jonin, or to even inspire him to love again, but the odds were stubborn. It was possible to find love, in the rarest places.

This was what happened when a dream became a reality.

---------

The End.

---------

Author's Notes:

Thanks everyone for your patience with this story. I'm so happy that ya'll liked it. It took a lot of time to formulate this story into something believable and enjoyable. Many consuming hours went into this, and I hope to at some point continuing writing more for you! - Lisa

--

I wanted to thank you all for reading and reviewing this story. Finishing it is a little heart breaking for me, I will admit. The time will come, I am sure, when the opportunity to write at least one sequel will present itself, and I'm very much looking forward to that day. - Amy


	25. PS

In case you were curious about the inspirational music throughout the story, we made two separate playlists. We'll post links to the actual playlists on the Author's profile page since it won't let us do it here.

Nisei's Playlist

01. Sick Hearts - the Used

02. So Contagious - Acceptance

03. Beautiful Lie - 30 Seconds To Mars

04. Time of Dying - Three Days Grace

05. Away - Breaking Benjamin

06. All I Need - Within Temptation

07. Ghost of You - My Chemical Romance

08. You Are the One - Shiny Toy Guns

09. Thinking of You - Katy Perry

10. Decode - Paramore

11. Reach - Eyes Set To Kill

12. Connect the Dots - The Spill Canvas

13. Chizuru - the Gazette

14. Returner - Gackt

15. All Is Numb - 32Leaves

16. the Autumn Effect - 10 Years

17. 24 - JEM

18. Where Does the Good Go? - Tegan and Sarah

19. Falling Apart - the All American Rejects

20. The Beautiful Name - Alicenine

21. Paparazzi - Lady Gaga

22. Forever Yours - Sunrise Avenue

23. Good To Be In Love - Imogen Heap/FrouFrou

24. Still Alone - Ayumi Hamasaki

*********

Hitori's playlist:

01 - ジャイアニズム叱 - ナイトメア

02 - 邪神ト薔薇 - ナイトメア

03 - 砂 - ナイトメア

04 - Neo Ark - Phantasmagoria

05 - Material Pain - Phantasmagoria

06 - DIRTY - ナイトメア

07 - Moonlight Revival - Into the 'Phantasmagoria' - Phantasmagoria

08 - S[k]apegoat - Deluhi

09 - Chizuru - the Gazette

10 - Raison D'etre - ナイトメア

11 - Pixy False - by Phantasmagoria

12 - Fairy Times Memory - Phantasmagoria

13 - Mikansei to GUILT - Phantasmagoria

14 - Orion Once Again - Deluhi

15 - Lost in Blue - ナイトメア

16 - HATE - ナイトメア

17 - Black Sick Spider - ナイトメア

18 - Alumina - ナイトメア

19 - 縷々 - ナイトメア

20 - Raven Loud Speeeaker - ナイトメア

21 - Hana Kagari - Yumi Shizukusa

22 - Star [K]night - ナイトメア

23 - Crevasse - ナイトメア

24 - Tsuki no Hikari, Utsutsu no Yume [月の光、うつつの夢] - ナイトメア


End file.
